Hey all! Thank you so much for your continued interested in this story! I appreciate each and every one of you!
A big thank you to my Beta Lyra, she rocks so much! (Still any mistakes that linger are definitely mine!)
Thank you so much for those who reviewed for the last chapter: Ladygris, BMick, Moonlight83 and SGA FAN ^^ You guys make my day each time you review! It was actually Moonlight and SGA fan that prompted me to update today ^^
Chapter 4
Enjoy ^^
Rodney McKay didn't avoid things. No, he was simply focused. Focused on anything that wasn't Carson's unknown condition, that is. It was called being busy. Yes, technically he had told Dr. Nortan that he would hang around the infirmary until those blood cultures came back from the lab, but the guilt was like a storm in the physicist's mind, crushing and drowning Rodney in unwanted emotions. So the scientist grabbed onto his own personal life preserver and buried his mind under a pile of work. Even if what he was working on was too complicated for even a man of his brilliance – not that the prideful man would ever admit it out loud. Still, it was a pleasant distraction.
"Rodney, what are you doing here?" Radek questioned, stopping in his tracks halfway into the room.
Without looking at the other scientist, Rodney rolled his eyes to the ceiling before once again fixing them on the tablet he was working with. "What does it look like I'm doing?"
"Working," Radek answered, his voice sounding unsure, but probably not for the reason that was obvious. Still, bullying Zelenka was another opportunity to not think about what Rodney was so desperately trying not to think about.
"Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner!" Rodney cheered with no real enthusiasm and plenty of mockery.
Radek set down the equipment he had been recalibrating and eyed his fellow thinker carefully. Rodney watched this from the corner of his eyes and tried ignoring the concern in his friend's expression. "What do you want Radek?" Rodney sighed out his frustration, typing a sequence of code out on the keyboard in front of him as he set down his tablet.
"Well, I hadn't expected you here," Zelenka admitted. "However, since you are here, perhaps you can update me on Carson's condition? I unfortunately have not had the time to go to the infirmary to see him for myself."
Already stiff muscles tightened painfully across Rodney's shoulders, causing the scientist to hunch in more, curling into himself protectively. "Do I look like a medical professional? Go ask Nortan, she's 'Carson' for today," McKay snapped, his voice sharper than normal. Everything about his appearance was telling Radek to back off.
Zelenka didn't receive the hint, or choose forcibly to ignore the signs. "Look, Rodney – "
"Radek, I'm kind of in the middle of something here…if you wouldn't mind?" Rodney snapped again, blazing blue eyes glaring into Zelenka's surprised face.
Without making any indication that he intended to leave, Radek moved to glance over Rodney's shoulder at the equations on the screen. "What even are you trying to do?" Zelenka sounded genuinely confused before making a 'oh' noise in the back of his throat. "Are you trying to – "
"Yes, yes…I realize it's too much for your small mind to comprehend but even after my loss of super brain power – "
Radek scoffed, interrupting his friend easily as he waved a hand to the screen. "Rodney, this equation doesn't even make sense…" The man started to point out several flaws only to be abruptly interrupted himself.
"Shows how much you're small mind can – "
"Rodney!" Zelanka snapped finally, his voice a sigh of frustration. "Please, we both know this isn't about your terribly miscalculated equations." This caught Rodney's attention, and Radek continued before Rodney could speak again. "You're avoiding what's happened with Carson."
For a moment Rodney stared at Zelenka with his mouth opening and closing slightly, like a goldfish in a glass bowl would do. The moment passed although Rodney remained flustered, moving to stack some papers on his desk. "I'm not avoiding it: he's in the infirmary, I'm here. There's no avoiding happening!" Spent from his ranting, Rodney let his body fall into the nearest chair, hands covering his distraught face. Who was he kidding? No one. Radek was oh so very right – though Rodney would never say the words 'you're right' out loud to Zelenka.
Another minute ticked by and ended with a longsuffering sigh. "The whole thing is my fault and I can't even do anything to help," Rodney admitted finally, looking at his colleague and sometimes friend.
Radek's eyes filled with sympathy for the other man, "Look, Rodney, if you want to talk about it…"
"Nope." Rodney tensed up as he mentally rebuilt his defenses. Turning back to his equations, McKay's eyes refocused on his computer screen, effectively shutting the conversation down. "I've got a lot of ingenious work to do at the moment. So if you wouldn't mind…" The physicist waved Zelanka off with his hand, never looking at the man.
With a drawn out sigh Radek relented, visually deflating. "Rodney, just know that there are people you can talk to, if you want to."
Slowly, Rodney nodded and with nothing left to say, Zelenka left.
Carson woke again with a new companion by his side.
"Ronon?" Carson muttered, his voice sounding softer than he had anticipated. Eyelids blinked slowly at the large man suddenly towering over his bedside. The Scotsman was a bit more awake this time and the alarm that surfaced hit fast. It wasn't a creeping memory in the back of his mind; it was a car crash force rushing to consume every thought in his consciousness. Carson immediately started to push up off the medical bed to sit up, his facial expression the definition of panic. "Rodney, I have – "
"Doc?" Ronon hesitated at first, unsure of what to do, "Doc, lay back down…" he spoke firmly, grabbing Carson's shoulder to stop him from making it off the bed.
"No, I have ta – " Carson insisted, only to be sharply cut off by another familiar voice.
"You 'have to' do nothing, Dr. Beckett." Olivia appeared on the other side of Carson's bed, helping Ronon force the downed doctor back against the pillow. "All you need to do is sit back and relax." She smiled brightly despite her stern words. "Now, how are you feeling?"
The alarm within Carson wasn't calmed by her words. It spread like a wild fire, sending his heart racing in response. "Wait – no – Rodney, we need to get him back to the chamber! I have to save him, don't you understand?" Carson tried to push upward again, only to be held in place by strong hands.
"But McKay is fine." Ronon spoke out, voice confused as his brown eyes locked with Olivia's.
Olivia frowned as she looked down at her panicked patient, "Carson, you already saved Rodney, he's fine."
That caused Carson to pause from his struggles, "What?" The question hung in the air as Carson visibly searched his mind for the memory of the actions. After a few shaky minutes, Carson recalled the past in detailed flashes and nodded slowly. "Aye, I-I remember that now." The panic wasn't leaving him though, the Scotsmen still felt the overwhelming need to repeat the actions to save Rodney's life.
Olivia and Ronon both could see the confusion on Carson's face growing, his hands trembling slightly as Olivia felt his rapid pulse on his wrist. "Dr. Beckett, can you tell me what it is that you're feeling?" She was doing her best to project 'calm' hoping that somehow her own serenity could be passed on to her CMO.
Carson took a moment again before answering, his eyes filled with misted confusion, "Ta be quite honest I feel a bit lost, love. Ye're positive that Rodney's fine? The danger's passed? There's nothing further wrong with the lad?" The Scotsman's voice broke slightly at the end of his sentence as the sea of panic continued to surge within him.
"Yes," Olivia answered firmly, her voice clear with absolution.
The word seemed to mean little to Carson, who shook his head in a frustrated gesture and moved to get off the bed again despite both Ronon and the female doctor restraining him. "I donnae know why I feel so panicked, just let me see him for me self. Maybe I'll be better off if I see him with my own eyes, lass." Carson trained his begging eyes to Olivia, pleading with her with his whole being. Yes, he remembered rushing his friend down to that horrid room and vaguely could picture the strange ribbon like light wrapping itself around Rodney, but still the panic seized him.
Slowly Olivia nodded, looking very worried as she glanced from Carson to Ronon who met her eyes, silently agreeing to take on the task of locating the wayward physicist and left the infirmary immediately. Stalking down the halls of Atlantis with a set mind to complete his mission.
Hope you like it, thank you so much for reading! More will come soon!
- Berry