Me: Weeeelllll, Ichigo is currently hunting down Abby (as in Vivian's sister, of course) because, and i quote, 'I smell a fucking CHALLENGE!'
Rukia: (sighs and shakes head) Needless to say, Ichigo's a dumbass.
Me: I wonder if he realizes it's not HIS medieval weapon? I'm pretty sure his battle axe was buried in Disney World...
Rukia: Should we...y'know, TELL him that..?
Together: (waves off) NAH!
Me: Oh, and by the way, i forgot to mention this. If i never answered a message one of y'all sent me through PMs, it's because my account decided to suddenly have a huge drop in brain-cell-counts. In other words, it keeps disabling my PMs in the morning (RIGHT after i fall asleep, it seems) and i try to enable them as quickly as possible, but sometimes the messages don't go through! I know, it sucks. So if you've sent me a message recently, or EVER really, try re-sending it and i'll probably reply pretty quickly. Y'know, since i have no life and all that.
Rukia: But ANYWAYS, enjoy! :)
The next morning, Peyton was the last to wake up from what she could first gather. Shocking, right? She was greeted by a wonderful sight.
Matsumoto and Rukia were talking in the corner in their giddy whispers.
Byakuya was fuming, looking out the front door.
Senna was having another playful argument with Shiro, who simply asked if he could see the battle bruise on her ass to see if it really existed.
Toshiro was talking with Tetsuo, who was "flustered by the behavior of the Soul Reapers from the Modern World".
And Ichigo and Renji had matching black eyes, one per Soul Reaper, on opposite eyes.
Arisu was sitting next to Chiyoko, who was still asleep. Cool, so I WASN'T the last one to wake up!
Peyton's eyebrows shot up at the sight of the two morons. "So. Who did you piss off this time, guys?"
Ichigo scowled in Byakuya's general direction. "Ask an honest question for Trimmed Pineapple Head, and you get an unwanted eye accessory."
She sweatdropped. "Damn, what the hell kind of question WAS it that could've caused BYAKUYA KUCHIKI to lose self-control?"
The two exchanged a slight smirk. "Renji and I were just curious about his random act of non-douche-baggery towards Arisu last night."
"It still just completely blows my mind, and disturbs me a little, that he actually CARES about that kind of stuff. Or anything besides his Captaincy, really," Renji added.
"You mean besides his hair?"
"Very true," they both agreed. Renji smirked. "Jeez, Ichigo, I pegged anyone dumb enough to date you as anything BUT smart or observant..."
"I know, right!"
Peyton's temple throbbed as the two high-fived. "...Karma's gonna get you for that one."
THREE HOURS LATER...
Ichigo rolled his eyes as Renji got all defensive. Again. "Could you guys PLEASE stop riding me about damn Rukia?" He hissed at Toshiro.
"Look, we all know you want her. Especially after sharing a room with you. Might as well just TELL the damn Midget," Ichigo replied between bites of his orange.
Toshiro nodded. "It's almost more obvious than Ichigo and Peyton's non-platonic relationship was, and THAT was ridiculous enough."
Renji just sighed and shook his head. "Y'know, it's easy for YOU TWO to talk about this crap. Toshiro, you're a Captain. You could have any chick you wanted. And Ichigo, you've already bagged the one you wanted! What about me? I have a 'trimmed pineapple head', for crying out loud! ...Not that this is about Rukia," he added quickly.
They ignored that little extra sentence. "So? Toshiro's hard-assed and I'm annoying as hell. Oh, wait, scratch that. YOU'RE annoying as hell, too. But so is Rukia, so it all balances out!" Ichigo pointed out matter-of-factly.
"This ISN'T about RUKIA!" He insisted.
Toshiro shook his head slowly. "Why DO people fight emotions like these?"
"The same reason you do for Masumoto," Renji and Ichigo shot back in unison; they snickered and high-fived each other.
Toshiro's temple throbbed. "Very well. I had some advice, but now I shall keep you in the dark about them."
"Tch. That's fine, I've got even better advice than whatever you have," Ichigo replied.
Renji shook his head quickly. "No way, I want Toshiro's!"
Ichigo's temple throbbed. "Dumbass, you said it yourself. I've already bagged the chick I want! What makes you think I have worse advice?"
"Be-CAUSE, Peyton totally wanted you from day damn one. It wasn't exactly a challenge, not even for you, 'King Stud'" Renji replied in a "duh" tone.
"Oh, yeah right! That's just what the geeks and players call me!"
"I beg to differ, Renji. That seems a bit far-fetched, it was definitely a challenge," Toshiro agreed.
"Well, I wanna hear yours anyways, Toshiro."
Ichigo peeled some more of his orange and ate it defiantly. "Fine, I see how it is."
Toshiro cleared his throat importantly. "Well...This is a tip Shunsui gave me."
"Then it HAS to work!" Renji said excitedly.
"Precisely. His exact words were: 'You wanna know if a woman digs you? Whisper somethin' dirty in her ear. If she doesn't slap you in the face, she's interested.' I, for one, have tried it a few times to test its effect, and I must say, it works like a charm."
Renji gaped at him. "THAT...is by far...THE most genius thing I've ever heard in my life!"
Ichigo sweatdropped, and Toshiro smirked. "I think I know exactly how to test this, too. Ichigo, why don't you demonstrate?"
"W-WHAT?" He sputtered, nearly choking on his orange. He didn't know what was more sad, Renji and Toshiro banging the shit out of his back like morons or the fact that no one else even thought twice about it.
Only Chiyoko, but Peyton just shook her head and told her he was 'a natural spazz, and PROBABLY won't die'.
Oh yeah, she loved him so much.
Ichigo's temple throbbed, and he glared at Toshiro. "If this backfires, I demand payment."
"Fine. It's fool-proof," Toshiro replied confidently.
He let out one final heavy sigh before lingering back to wait for Peyton, who was playing an intense round of Thumb-War with Shiro.
They caught up with Ichigo right as Peyton totally beat Shiro's thumb's ASS, however nonexistent that ass might be, and Ichigo let out a sigh of relief.
At least she was now in a good mood.
"Hey, Peyton."
"Yo."
"Come here."
She glanced at Senna and Shiro, who were now battling each other in Thumb-War, then decided she had nothing to lose and moved to his side.
"What's up?"
He bent his head down a little to whisper in her ear. "Okay, just like I told you earlier. That 'experiment' me and Toshiro mentioned. Right now I am currently saying something dirty to you, so react on the count of three."
"Okay. Wait, I forgot...React positively or negatively?"
"Positively."
"Only if you promise to pay me back for it later."
"Deal."
"Okay!"
"One...Two...THREE."
She whirled her head around to look at him and let out a flirtatious giggle. Quite well, in her opinion. She gave him a quick eye-inspection while biting her lower lip suggestively before smirking and walking a little ways ahead.
Ichigo looked to Renji, whose jaw was currently on the ground, and bit into his orange with a very triumphant smirk.
Toshiro chuckled, but then Byakuya called out from way up ahead. "Keep it moving, Lieutenant Abarai. I would like to keep to the schedule."
"We have a schedule?" Everyone asked, making Byakuya sigh. "...Just keep it moving."
Peyton leaned towards Ichigo as Renji and Toshiro started talking. "You think he bought it?"
"Yep. Kinda hard not to, that fucking gave me chills."
"Why thank you!"
"You SUCK. I'm gonna have so many perverted dreams about this."
"You'll live. So who did he want to tell him this 'advice'?"
"Toshiro. Unbelievable, right?"
"Do you want me to honestly answer that?"
"NO."
"Didn't think so!" She said brightly as Renji ran to catch up to Rukia, who was between Matsumoto and Arisu.
They watched with expectant grins as he whispered in Rukia's ear, and sure enough, all hell broke loose.
"EXCUSE ME?" Rukia screeched.
Renji laughed nervously as a rather deadly aura surrounded the small Soul Reaper. "Uhhh, Rukia, it wasn't what it sounded like!"
"Really, now? Because it sure as hell sounded a LOT like 'Rukia, the next time we're alone, I'm-'"
"NO NEED TO REPEAT IT!"
"THEN WHY'D YOU SAY IT?" She shot back, fists clenched. She was advancing towards him rather menacingly.
Everyone had stopped to watch, and even Byakuya looked a bit disturbed at the scene plying out before him.
"Rukia, I...see...we...IT WAS ALL ICHIGO'S IDEA!" He wailed, leaping back to get some distance between them.
Ichigo's temple throbbed. "DON'T YOU DRAG ME INTO THIS, YOU DAMN TRIMMED PINEAPPLE HEADED PERVERT!"
"SHUT UP ABOUT THAT DAMN DEMON DOG'S MISHAP! And I am NOT a fucking PERVERT!"
"REEEENJIIIII, YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD!" Rukia shouted, letting out a battle cry before charging at him.
Everyone watched with wide eyes and "Oooh"s at every blow for about three minutes before Rukia finally calmed down.
She simply squared her shoulders and marched forward. Everyone soon recovered and followed suit as quickly as possible.
Poor Renji was sprawled out on the ground, face down, groaning.
"..Well...She didn't slap you. OR kill you, so I think that means she's into you," Peyton pointed out cheerfully.
"You told her about Shunsui's advice?" Renji asked Ichigo, rolling over to look at them. Toshiro shook his head with a mischievious grin as he helped the poor Soul Reaper up.
"No, sorry Renji. It was all an elaborate scheme us three cooked up earlier."
"WHAT? WHY the HELL would you DO something like that?" He shouted in surprise.
They all shrugged. "To test the relationship between you both," was Toshiro's excuse.
Ichigo smirked. "For the hell of it."
Peyton grinned. "Revenge for this morning. I told you karma was gonna get you back for that one!"
"B-But Ichigo agreed with me! Where's HIS punishment?"
"He bribed me with a promise of a mystery reward once this whole thing's over," She replied with a shrug.
Renji made a weird little noise of disbelief, then sighed. "...You are a trio of EVIL little fuckers, you know that?"
Toshiro followed him as he tried to catch up with Rukia and make sure his life wasn't in any immediate danger at her hands.
Ichigo sweatdropped as Peyton stole a couple slices of his orange, then laughed and ruffled her hair. "Dammit. I love you, and it's all your fault, you know that?"
She shrugged. "I think I can live with the guilt of knowing that."
"Can you, Peyton? CAN YOU?"
"Yeah, I can."
"You sure?"
"Pretty damn."
"Awesome."
She shrugged and continued walking. "I know I am. Tell me something we don't know."
He was about to reply when they heard two very loud voices that sounded a LOT like Toshiro and Matsumoto.
"...L-LOVERS?"