Me: We're back again!
Ichigo: (Sitting amidst a sea of "Good luck Ichigo" cakes and his "my life sucks" booze basket from Dude) OMNOMNOMNOM- GLUG GLUG GLUG- OMNOMNOM!
Me: ...Wow. You're taking this whole Peyton thing pretty well, eh?
Ichigo: (With his mouth full) SHUT UP AND LEMME EAT MY FEELINGS! OMNOMNOMNOM- GLUG- OMNOM!
Me: And yet you dont understand why GIRLS do the SAME EXACT THING when they're on their period?
Ichigo: I think this is a BIT more major then cramps and bloating and PMS.
Me and Rukia: (Ominous glares) DON'T EVEN GO THERE, ASSHOLE!
Ichigo: (Cue the Poor Kicked Puppy look) I'm sorry, I'm sorry, i didn't mean it!
Me: Good save. (Dives into Coca-Cola Pool from Dude)
Rukia: (Slides on Chappy Floaties very deliberately) ENJOOOOY!
Twelve days. Twelve damn days. If they didn't find out where she was soon, Ichigo was gonna explode.
And it was obvious by how everyone else carried themselves lately that he wasn't the only one.
After seven days, Dad noticed how tired he was and decided maybe school could wait till after Peyton was home again.
There was no "if", no one ever dared let the "if" slip out. They only said "after".
Which made the "if" ring a little louder in everybody's heads.
What IF they didn't find her?
What IF they went to the wrong world?
What IF when they got there, it was too late?
What IF they couldn't go against their enemy because Hat-And-Clogs hadn't made a way to see them in time?
If, if, if. It was a very common word lately. Ichigo tried not to think about the ifs, but that didn't mean he succeeded half the time.
You know what sounds real nice? Things being the way they were before. Rukia beating us up for something stupid and perverted, Shinji constantly calling Peyton his beloved, Kon constantly trying to catch us in the act, -
...Oh, the act. Damn, did he miss the act. Badly.
Ichigo sighed heavily before turning over again, careful not to kick Nel in the head...again. "Life just isn't fair, making you go without the act once you're used to having it whenever the hell you please," he muttered miserably.
MEANWHILE...
Come on...Come onnnn...SENSE ME, DAMMIT!
Peyton was panting, short of breath at this point from exerting so much reiatsu. She was surprised the dudes keeping her here hadn't caught on yet and weren't trying to stop her.
Eyes closed, in her mind's eye, she focused on Karakura Town. She focused on all the reiatsu she saw there.
She focused on one in particular. A light blue one in the shape of a Hollow mask. It hurt, doing it from such a distance.
But then again, so did her rat bites she got a couple nights ago. They were on her legs, and they hurt like CRAP.
Speaking of rats, she was seriously considering roasting them alive with her spirit energy, but that would smell too bad.
No matter how hungry she was, she refused to eat a damn rat. Or two. Or five.
It sounded like five were scurrying around at the moment. Probably more than that. Peyton shook her head quickly.
No, shut up brain, focus on his reiatsu. Come on...Come on...Do you want outta here or not, Peyton? Come on...Harder...A little more...Come on come on come on COME ON DAMMIT, I CAN'T DO THIS ALL DAMN DAY!
Ichigo was about to go get some cake, giving up on sleep, and was halfway into the swinging-over-the-side-and-out-of-bed maneuver when he felt it.
It was like a tiny throb at first, but he felt it. It was unmistakably hers. Screw swinging, he pretty much flew out of bed and to the window.
The hell?
He closed his eyes and tried to see where she was. Amidst all the reiatsu he couldn't care less about, there was one.
There was one that was sort of...flickering. Way far off. Could he follow it? Was he dumb enough to try?
You bet your ass he was.
Ichigo stretched his sight as far as possible, her reiatsu getting stronger and stronger. And then it seemed to fade away the closer he got, almost like a projection.
But it was in no way, shape or form a projection. It was her, it was totally her, he just knew it. She must've been farther than she looked, and somehow managed to exert enough reiatsu to let him see it.
He grinned to himself. "That's thr Peyton I know." Nel yawned. "Itsygo, you're awake? But not scweaming? Is your girlfwiend back yet?"
Ichigo's grin grew as he threw his door open and headed down the hall. "Not yet, but I just saw-" CRASH! THUD, THUD, THUD, THUD, THUD, THUD, THUD, THUD.
"...Ow. Ow. DAMMIT, OW!"
Yoruichi smacked Urahara repeatedly in the head and shoulder, making him wake up with a grunt.
"Unh? What's happenin'?"
"It's her. Don't you feel it?" Tessai was in the corner, eyes closed and working like mad to figure out where the source of her reiatsu was.
Now he felt it. That hum her energy always put out, though it was pretty dim at the moment. But after twelve days of searching for the hum before Ichigo went postal and murdered him, that tiny hum was like a heavenly chorus.
And they were singing an amazing song titled "Kisuke Urahara, You Just Might Live Another Week!".
"Ahhh, angels," he muttered to himself as he tried to track it as well.
"Looks like...Soul Society. But along the Southern or Western border," Yoruichi said suddenly.
Tessai and Urahara opened their eyes, the shop owner huffing. "Jeez, Yoruichi, show us up why don't you..."
"With pleasure. Hmm...I don't think I've been near that part of the border before..."
Tessai made a noise of approval. "I'm impressed she managed to exert enough reiatsu to be felt from Karakura."
They sighed heavily as it disappeared suddenly, and Ururu said out of nowhere, "Every time I feel a reiatsu drop, it makes my heart drop too."
Urahara put a hand on her head in response. "Well, I wouldn't be too worried about Peyton's reiatsu. She's one tough kid."
Yoruichi nodded, and as she spoke, no one noticed Rukia walk in. "The Iga Clan have always been quite fond of mental manipulation and torture. Playing an annoying sound over and over, leaving a prisoner in poor conditions and complete solitude, neverending silence, ...Except for the creatures. Oh, those creatures...Their eyes were so red and narrow, the prisoner's only light through the night."
She shivered, and Rukia cocked an eyebrow. "Yoruichi, you speak as if you know first-hand of these things."
"I do. I was once held hostage by the Iga Clan for a bounty set up by some 'unknown source'."
"Aizen," Everyone said dully as if he were old news, making Toshiro and Renji sweatdrop. "How ironic. If only Aizen knew how little of importance he is to us now..."
Jinta crossed his arms importantly. "He was never a big deal. I could take him with one hand tied behind my back!"
"Yeah, wait until he's got his zanpakuto drawn at you, and see how big your talk is," Renji replied simply.
Rukia smacked him upside the head. "Don't SCARE HIM!"
Jinta's temple throbbed. "...Now that's just insulting, Rukia. Say, when the hell'd you guys get here anyways?"
"Ichigo woke me up when he fell down the stairs," Rukia replied dully.
"Matsumoto and I came after Lindsay told us she felt as if Peyton were suddenly nearby. Figured it was her way of feeling reiatsu, due to being around her sister for so long," was Toshiro's excuse.
"Where's Matsumoto?"
"Celebrating the finding of her location," He said with a temple throb as they heard a "WHOO-HOOOO!" outside the door, in a voice that was unmistakably Rangiku Matsumoto.
"I heard her 'celebration' and wanted to join in. Rukia got to me first, though," Renji added with a smirk as everyone sweatdropped.
Urahara clapped his hands together cheerfully. "Well, this works out perfectly! I just finished up a prototype for aura-bending! Now you can all try them out!"
Everyone exchanged fearful looks as he held up two plastic convex circles. "They're contact lenses! Only not just ANY contact lenses. Durable! And with moisturizers! And ALSO, they help you see almost every aura of the spiritual spectrum, with the exception of the Killer Clown Dimension Spectrum."
"The...The Killer Clown Dimension Spectrum," Renji repeated in awe.
There was a collective shudder from Yoruichi, the store owner, and his employees. "Don't even MENTION that dimension."
Rukia's temple throbbed as everyone else nodded solemnly. "You guys BELIEVE that crap?"
Urahara simply stared at her. "...Rukia Kuchiki, I suggest you start believing in the Killer Clown Dimension. It's where the creepiest of clowns, the actual killers, are sent in the afterlife. We can't have killer clowns running wild around Soul Society, can we? So...without telling Mayuri, because otherwise he'd set them loose as an experiment for some sadistic reason or another, we made them their own dimension."
"That used to be a Soul Reaper Academy fraternity initiation. Killer Clown Hunting," Tessai added suddenly.
Urahara pointed at him eagerly. "Tessai, do you remember Kaname? He was the one who ended up being the HUNTED, and we let them have him because he was so damn annoying and cheated on his girlfriend two days before?"
They exchanged some laughter, making everyone else sweatdrop. "Ahahahahaha! Ahhh...good times..."
"Because the guy wanted an extra piece of ass?" Renji asked incredulously.
"Nooo, he was also ANNOYING AS HELL, were you not paying attention?" Yoruichi replied innocently. She then shrugged. "Besides. His girlfriend Aiya was the hottest of our class. I can't believe he downgraded."
"They say he was totally baked at the time."
"Really?"
"Yep. You never heard that?"
"Well, no! If I had known that...maybe I would've suggested we hide his stash instead of feeding him to the clowns and leaving him there to die..." Yoruichi said thoughtfully.
Jinta sweatdropped. "I always knew you had an evil side."
She hung her head in shame. "I know..." Then she gave him a rather cat-like grin. "But it sure was funny! Did you see his FACE?"
"Oh, I know!" That got the three laughing again, while Rukia cringed. "I...am NOT trying out those contact lenses."
Urahara stopped laughing after everyone nodded in agreement. "But...Then who the hell's gonna test 'em?"
"Let Ichigo. It's his girlfriend."
"He's not here, Renji!"
"Ohhh yeaaaah! Where the hell is the damn Strawberry, anyways? FIGURES he only goes away when I actually want him," Renji muttered.
"I didn't know you swung that way," Jinta sneered.
"NOT LIKE THAT, YOU LITTLE TURD!"
"He's too busy hitting THAT ass!" Matsumoto said suddenly, appearing out of nowhere and pointing at Rukia's ass with her foot.
Toshiro held the tiny Soul Reaper back right before she lunged at Matsumoto, who giggled. "Was it something I said?" She asked them before hiccuping.
As if on cue, Uryu suddenly walked through the open front door. "Um...I found something interesting about the Iga Clan you guys might want to take a look at...Concerning executions and sacrifices during rituals to gain power?"
Everyone quieted down, while Urahara beamed. "Well, only if you try out these prototype contact lenses!"
Ishida fingered his glasses fearfully, eyes wide, then groaned and strode over to him, slamming the book down. "Peyton owes me so much for this..." He muttered as he removed his glasses and put them in.
Everyone stared in disbelief as nothing bad immediately happened to him, and Urahara's grin grew. "Alright, I want you to think the following words in your head: Iga Clan Aura."
He nodded and did so before jumping and attacking something on his left. As soon as he connected with it, a target painted to look like an Iga Clan member appeared to everyone as it clattered to the ground.
"How did you manage to-"
"Bend the aura of an inanimate object to magically match that of the Iga Clan?" Everyone nodded eagerly, and he simply smirked. "An inventor never reveals his innermost secrets."
"...You douchebag," Renji muttered about the same time Uryu suddenly shrieked and started running around in circles.
"MY EYES! MY EEEYEEES!"
"You tried to see the Killer Clown Dimension Aura, didn't you?"
"NOOO!"
"URYU ISHIHACKALOOGIE, DON'T YOU DARE LIE TO THE KISUKE URAHARA!"
"OKAY, YEEES! I HEARD YOU GUYS MENTION IT AS I CAME IN!" He wailed, beyond Quincy pride at this point.
He eventually freaked himself out so much that he passed out, and Ururu ran off to fetch some cold water.
Urahara waved his fan over his face a single time, and Yoruichi changed into her cat form, curling up on the table.
"Kisuke...We should probably find her before we send them out to get Peyton. Just to ensure if the lenses fail during any time, they have someone with them to see the auras for them."
He nodded. "You're probably right. You wanna go, or should I?"
"I will. I feel like playing pranks on Little Byakuya while I try to find her. I convinced him his mansion was haunted last time, I'm sure he's in need of some ghostly encounters," she said mischievously before disappearing from their view.
"Are you talking about who I THINK you're talking about fetching?" Matsumoto asked eagerly. Urahara simply fanned Ishida another time, and before he could reply, Ichigo and Nel suddenly kicked down his door.
"I SENSED PEYTON'S REIATSU! WE CAN FIND HER LOCATION NOW, WE CAN GO!"
They all sweatdropped, and Jinta spoke first. "...No shit, moron."