Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.
Chapter 23
Patience
A mistake.
That was what this all had been.
She should have been afraid when she saw him wounded in the forest.
She should have died in the village with her kind instead of running away from the wolves.
She shouldn't have followed him.
He shouldn't have protected her.
Pathetic as she was it only made her cry harder. No, she didn't believe in fate or destiny. And even if such existed hers and her lord's were never intertwined.
-A mistake…
She murmured.
She heard him shift in his seat. She gulped. She knew he was upset.
Why wouldn't he?
She was sure that he only tolerated her presence because she didn't dare bother him with her feelings!
She just…ruined everything.
She shouldn't even be alive right now…
…but that was his fault.
Rin peeked through her hands that hid her shame to see his beautiful face. Her lord was so magnificent and she was but a puny moth bewitched by his light.
She sighed and gathered her last portion of courage before he came to the conclusion that she had never been worthy.
She raised her head and met his gaze. She tried to stop but even when her sobs silenced her tears continued to spill.
Sesshomaru closed his eyes and sighed.
This pain in his chest…it was getting worse. It was so strange. He had never felt anything like this before. Whenever he looked at Rin it was like it exploded.
He hated it when Rin cried.
The demon lord got up and Rin flinched, already predicting what was to happen. But to her surprise, he just took a scrap of silk from his desk and extended it to her. She looked up confused but his head was inclined in a way that his silver bangs covered his eyes.
Such a kind gesture from her lord shouldn't be wasted so she accepted it and wiped her tears away. But no matter how much she fought them they wouldn't stop.
Then it dawned on her…
Dear kami, was HE comforting her? Pitying her?
She let out a loud sob and wailed.
It was more than she could take.
Sesshomaru leaned against the desk feeling suddenly tired.
What was he to do?
He didn't know what to answer because, sincerely, he didn't know what he felt anymore. And it surprised and angered him that he was feeling anything at all. That it bothered him so much.
If he didn't care for Rin he wouldn't have been protecting her ever since he met her as a child.
"Have you someone to protect?"
His fists tightened.
You should have known better than to leave those last words to me.
His eyes hardened.
You already knew this was going to happen, didn't you father?
-Rin.
She visibly jumped and looked at him with fearful eyes.
His voice was soft contradicting his conflicted features.
-Cease your crying, little one.
Her mouth opened for a few seconds before she gulped that knot in her throat down and nodded frantically.
Her eyes widened a tiny fraction when his fingers brushed her cheek in a ghostly caress.
They were lost in each other's gaze, looking for the answers that were never there.
Entranced by her feelings, she brought his hand to her cheek and held it there.
-I…don't understand.
She muttered.
He traced her lips with his thumb. That hunger was rising within.
-Neither does this Sesshomaru.
She blinked and another tear fell. She sniffled and then giggled.
-I'm a crybaby. I'm starting to understand your irritation with such displays.
He gripped her chin, making her gasp.
-Don't say that.
He caught the tear and observed it.
The ambient calmed and made Rin more at ease. She watched the midday sunrays reflect on her lord's hair making him somewhat glow. His expression was peaceful yet tired and it made her think that maybe, just maybe, her lord was feeling worse than she was. That thought stopped her tears almost instantly.
The tear in his finger disappeared as well as his peace. His eyes returned to hers.
-Why have you told me this now, Rin?
Her hands wouldn't stop trembling.
-I'm afraid I don't even know, my lord. But…what is done cannot be undone, right?
She closed her eyes and sighed.
-I will accept whatever you deem fit for me.
She opened them.
-Just don't ask me to pretend it didn't happen.
-This Sesshomaru still wishes you by his side.
She looked up, surprised.
He blinked but his voice lost any trace of emotion.
-You think I would have oppressed your feelings? What dishonorable opinion do you have of this Sesshomaru?
She shook her head desperately.
-I didn't mean to offend you.
Her voice lowered.
-You mean the world to me…
His lips twitched in a fleeting smile. He looked at the window, silently avoiding her gaze.
-You shouldn't proclaim such things to a demon like me, Rin.
She gulped but bravely approached him and held his hand.
-I know who you are.
He raised her hand to his lips and kissed it in a way that she could feel the sharpness of his fangs, his eyes never leaving hers.
-Do you?
She smiled a silly smile.
-Of course I do. And your fangs are tickling me, Lord Sesshomaru!
His mouth betrayed him and he gave her one of his rare smiles that seemed meant only to her.
Her own widened to the point she was grinning openly.
-You should smile more often. It is breathtaking.
He arched an eyebrow and unconsciously squeezed her hand.
-This Sesshomaru care not what his smile looks like, Rin.
She blushed.
-Oh…I'm sorry.
Her tone saddened.
-I guess I got a little carried away.
-Rin…
She gave a shaky sigh and she prayed not to cry again.
-Yeah?
He breathed deeply through his nose.
-This is not a 'yes'.
Her lip trembled but she nodded.
-It isn't a 'no' either.
She frowned.
-This…matter requires time. Time that this Sesshomaru currently does not have.
He growled and her eyes widened.
-You'll have to forgive me but I'm not entirely accepting of all of this.
She bit her lip.
-I…I understand, my lord.
She bowed and opened the door. She looked back and whispered.
-I'm sorry.
And she left.
Sesshomaru's claws raked through the desk leaving a mark as he growled angrily.
But the memory of your lips still burn mine, Rin. Are you making me finally insane?
Human…
-How long?
-Two days, my lord.
Akio frowned.
-The soldiers are getting too lazy. With so many stops, Sesshomaru may already know that something is amiss and be prepared!
The general's lips thinned in mild irritation.
-With all due respect, Lord Akio, we have been marching for thirty-four hours now. If we want to have a chance to win, the army needs to be at its best!
Akio sighed and nodded.
-I know! I know!
His orange eyes glowed brighter as he gripped his spear tighter and giggled rather childishly.
-I just can't wait to bathe in their blood and have a good fuck with dearest Naomi!
His lip stuck out in a mocking pout.
-I hope the dog hasn't soiled her though. That would be a shame…
Takeru crossed his arms and rolled his eyes.
I doubt Sesshomaru would touch something you did, you depraved lunatic!
But he gave him an obviously fake smile.
-I'm sure Naomi remains untouched by others, my lord.
Akio hummed and his expression turned serious.
-By the way…do you have it?
Takeru sighed and reluctantly handed an old scroll to Akio.
-Are you sure of this, my lord? The witch told me that there was a high chance that your soul would be lost forever.
The fire demon gave a chilly giggle.
-I am 100% sure, Takeru.
Akio's eyes changed with sadness and bitter anger. It was frightening how quickly his mood could change. Instability all over his being.
-My soul has been beyond salvation for centuries anyway.
He carefully guarded the scroll inside his armored haori.
-I have nothing to lose.
Takeru unconsciously took a step back and nodded, defeated.
Akio cleared his throat and headed towards his tent.
-I shall attune with the scroll tonight. Make sure no one disturbs me.
Takeru turned his head to the side and closed his eyes.
-Whatever you wish, my lord.
Kagome giggled but it quickly turned into a moan as his tricky lips kissed their way down her neck.
-Inuyasha…stop…
His ears twitched and he smirked.
-I can see clearly that is not what ya want, priestess.
He nuzzled her neck fondly.
-I have not remarked ya yet…
She covered her mouth to quickly muffle the loud moan when his fingers subtly entered her robes and caressed her in her most sacred place.
-Inu…Inuyasha…this is not the time…
She looked around the long (and thankfully empty) hall. She narrowed her eyes at him but his dazed grin only widened.
-…nor the place.
He kissed her passionately and pressed his body tighter against hers.
-That's hardly a problem…
She sighed, exasperated. He shrugged and started to undress her. She caught his hands and pushed him away.
-For kami's sake, Inuyasha, your brother is right behind that door next to you!
He crossed his arms like a pouting child.
-And?
Her eyes suddenly brimmed with tears and a frown appeared on her lips and brow.
-Have you forgotten?! If not for him, we wouldn't be in each other's arms right now.
She wiped her eyes and sniffled.
-The least we could do is show some respect to him.
Inuyasha sighed and nodded defeated.
-You're right, Kagome. It's just…so strange.
He leaned against the wall next to her and watched her adjust her clothes, mourning.
-Ya know me and Sesshomaru never got along.
She opened her mouth but he raised his hand to let him continue.
-He may have been the starter of this but I gave up on our brotherhood with the very first insult.
He licked his dry lips and shook his head.
-We were both young and foolish. And yet…here we are…not killing each other at the slightest glance.
He gave a small laugh and gifted Kagome with his true and pure smile.
-I actually ate, on the same table, with him, Kagome.
He stole a glance at the heavy door that guarded Sesshomaru's study.
-Do you think there is time for change?
She grasped his hands and held them to her heart.
-Change doesn't need time, dearest. It happens with every breath, step and choice we take.
His lips thinned and he nodded. He kissed her hands. He gave her a sly smirk.
-I still want you though…
He raised an eyebrow mockingly.
-Is that gonna change anything?
She smiled and hit him playfully on the shoulder.
-Dirty dog…you should know that you look a lot like Sesshomaru when you do that.
He frowned, looking extremely worried.
-Do what?
She wrapped her arms around his neck and pecked him on the lips.
-The eyebrow thingy.
He raised it again just to spite her.
That's when they heard two voices they knew all too well coming from the heavy door next to them.
"I'm sorry"
She had said as she closed the door. She stood there for a few seconds, staring. Sniffling away the incoming tears.
The sound of a 'crash' and something being opened harshly echoed beyond the door that startled them all. Rin gasped, turned and ran away. Kagome and Inuyasha looked at each other and the hanyou growled.
-To hell with respect and honor. I won't let him hurt Rin like this!
Before he could kick the door open, Kagome gripped his arm.
-Wait! I think this is more complicated than it looks.
He frowned.
-What do ya mean by that, Kagome?
-I mean that you should have an actual talk with him while I try to calm her down, okay?
He blinked and stared at her for a few seconds before asking calmly.
-Are ya fucking crazy?
She sighed and pushed him towards the door.
-Just…do it!
-Kagome…I am going to talk to Sesshomaru?
He moaned and tried to plead with his eyes.
-Less complaining, more love therapy.
-What the fu…!
-Hush!
One.
Two.
Three.
Three knocks.
-Rin-chan? May I come in?
She looked at the closed door and opened it absentmindedly.
-What is it, Kagome-chan?
The priestess sat on Rin's bed and patted the spot next to her. Rin nodded and sat down.
-Will you tell me what happened?
Rin frowned, her eyes confused.
-What do you mean?
Kagome looked surprised and a bit worried.
-Me and Inuyasha…were right beside you when you ran away. Did…did Sesshomaru hurt you?
Rin's eyes widened in horror.
-Kagome! My lord would never hurt me!
-I…I don't mean like that, Rin-chan.
Rin sighed heavily and covered her face with her hands.
-It feels like everything is falling apart, Kagome-chan…
She wetted her lips.
-I told him that I loved him.
Kagome snapped her head towards her. Her heart was beating fast in anticipation.
-W-what did he say?
Rin snorted softly.
-I'm just glad he didn't throw me out.
She got up and looked at her reflection in the mirror. She briefly touched the delicate glass.
-He is…confused.
She looked at her friend with sad eyes.
-So confused, Kagome-chan…
The priestess nodded.
Rin gulped and looked at her reflection again.
-And…and I hate myself for almost crying in happiness for him not being completely disgusted…for actually being considering it, while he's feeling like this.
Kagome's mouth opened in surprise and hope.
-He…he's considering it? He wants…something more with you?
Rin twirled around with a wide smile and tears of happiness pooled at her eyes. She could only nod frantically.
Kagome got up and hugged her with all her might.
-That's…that's wonderful, Rin-chan!
Rin was relishing in the embrace and her little victory over her lord's heart when she noted that her reflection didn't move with her. Kagome's wasn't there also. She backed away with a gasp, startling Kagome.
-Rin-chan? What is it?
Rin ignored her and focused on the form of herself in the mirror. Then the other Rin's eyes closed as her white kimono, given by Lady Mother, was slowly stained with blood. The other Rin opened her eyes and extended her arms. To the real Rin's surprise and horror, Tenseiga appeared in them.
The other Rin's expression turned miserable and a tear traveled down her rosy cheek.
But this tear was different.
This tear was burning.
Like fire but much more…alive. She could hear it. She could feel it. As clearly as if it was on the real Rin's skin. It was pulsing.
And it dropped on Tenseiga.
She gave a little cry for when the tear reached the heavenly sword it was set on fire and her other self disappeared between the flames; the normal reflection returned.
She dropped to her knees and Kagome looked panicked.
-What is it?! Rin-chan?
Tenseiga…Tenseiga couldn't be burned. The sword of Heaven couldn't be destroyed! No…Tenseiga's burning was a warning for something else.
The wielder of Tenseiga was her lord.
Her pupils dilated as she realized.
Fire.
Oh, kami…no…
Author's Note: Sorry the delay, once again. I was out visiting my hometown this past week and I didn't have internet or my laptop with me. So I had to write this chapter by hand in my notebook. I hope you guys liked it. Thank you for all the reviews!