To all those who are craving Rizzles - I did say that it would be a while. Sorry guys. Please be patient and keep reading, you'll get your fix at some point.

Still love you guys, still not owning anything here.

Maura hummed lightly as she busied herself in the kitchen. In the last two weeks, she had developed a cleaning urge that she was finding increasingly difficult to satisfy. She found herself spending much more time cleaning upstairs when Jane was over, especially after what she had revealed three weeks ago. She knew that she wouldn't be able to keep this up, especially now that she was just over six months pregnant and getting increasingly dependent on those around her. Jane had even taken to staying over in the spare room most nights, which was what she had done this particular night. But she couldn't face Jane properly just yet; the look of pity in her eyes was enough to send her insane. She couldn't stand feeling so weak and she especially couldn't stand anyone else thinking she was.

She finished wiping down the surfaces in the kitchen and went to the downstairs cupboard to get her vacuum cleaner. She had dusted all the surfaces, polished her ornaments, cleaned her entire kitchen and downstairs bathroom and put a fresh load of washing in the machine. She made a silent vow to herself that she'd stop after this. Then again, she thought as she put the plug in, she couldn't guarantee that.

She had been working away for almost fifteen minutes when the main light in the living room came on. Jane stood, sleepy eyed and dressed in short pyjamas, in the doorway. Her arms were folded and by the look on her face, she wasn't particularly happy.

'Maura, what the hell are you doing?'

'Hoovering.'

'Okay, but it's three in the morning.'

'I know. I want to hoover, okay? If you don't like it, go and stay with someone who isn't pregnant.'

'Sorry, Maur. Want a hand?'

'No.'

Jane sighed and leaned against the doorframe. 'Do you want me to do anything?'

'Go back to bed.'

'How can I when you've got that damn thing on? Come on, switch it off and come sit down. Please.'

Maura scowled but did as she was told. 'I thought you were tired?'

'I have enough energy left for you. Leave the vacuum, just sit.'

'Okay, okay.' Maura sat on the sofa beside Jane. 'What?'

'What's with the cleaning? Is it a pregnancy thing?'

'I guess. Just be thankful I'm not horny. Although I have been experiencing an increased libido-'

'Maura, eww! Come on, I don't need to know about your libido.'

'Anyway, it's one of the better symptoms. What do you want?'

'Charming.'

'You know what I mean.' Maura rubbed her tired eyes. 'Why are you still down here rather than back upstairs asleep?'

'Because you're not. There must be some reason for you to be up at this ungodly hour. Other than your hormones, of course.'

'Jane, I'm fine.'

'Then why can't you look me in the eye since you told me about Senegal?'

Maura looked down, her hands fiddling with the hem of her pyjama top. 'I don't know what you're talking about.'

'You're going to get hives in a minute. Does Cassie know that I know?'

'No. She doesn't know half the story anyway.'

'Why didn't you tell her?'

'Because it didn't seem important at the time. She wanted to know, obviously, but she was more concerned with making sure I didn't do anything stupid.'

'Are you ever going to tell her?'

'No, of course not.' Maura looked shocked by the very idea.

'Don't you think she deserves to know?'

'I can't tell her, Jane. I can't hurt her.'

'So what are you going to do when we see her for the next scan? You going to lie to

her?'

'No, I..' Maura paused. 'I just won't relay specific information. That's not lying, that's just retaining facts.'

'Oh, just.' Jane said sarcastically. 'Look, I can sort of understand why you didn't tell Cassie. But why did you keep it from me for so long? Did you think I wouldn't love you as much? That I'd think less of you? Did you think I'd look down on you or push you away?'

'I was scared that you'd think I was weak.'

Jane stared at Maura. 'Weak? Maura, you're the strongest person I know. You've been through so much and you've still got the time to help other people. That's one of the millions of things I love about you. No matter what happened in your past, nothing you could ever tell me would change that. In fact, I think it's made me love you more. Knowing that you've survived so much crap and you're still just as amazing as I'm sure you were before, it astounds me. You're far from weak, Maura. You're strong, sophisticated, intelligent beyond belief and I love you.'

Maura's eyes filled with tears. 'I love you too. But how can you not think less of me? I tried to take my own life. I tried to take the easy way out. You said when we first talked about becoming a surrogate that I'd made some tough decisions but I always chose right in the end. That time, I didn't. I chose to give up rather than stay and put up a fight. It even took me seven years to gather up the courage to tell you what happened, Jane. I'm not strong or amazing, and I'm certainly not worthy of your love.'

'Is that how it feels?'

'That's how it is.'

'Well, that's crap. I care about you more than you could ever know, okay? You're.. you're my best friend. You're smart, sweet and yeah, you frustrate the hell out of me sometimes but I know I get on your nerves too. And that's okay, because that's what friendship is about. Compromises, give and take. You can think what you like, but don't you ever dare think that you're not worthy of anything, because it's bull. Okay?'

'Okay. Thank you, Jane. Really.' Maura smiled, her eyes finally meeting Jane's.

'You're welcome. Come here..' Jane put her arm around Maura and pulled her close, letting Maura's head lay on her shoulder. She rested her cheek on the mop of blonde curls and breathed in her smell. She prayed that that scent would linger in her nostrils forever or that one day, she would be able to smell it on her pillow when she woke up. But none of that would happen until Maura was stronger and less pregnant. Or at least, Jane resolved, until she was able to stand the mention of Maura's libido.