Chapter 39
Choke
"I CAN'T FUCKING TAKE THIS ANY MORE!" Jeff yelled while the physical therapist was stretching his leg as he sat on the hospital bed.
"Mr. Jenni, that is not a good attitude to have," the therapist replied.
"Yeah Jeff, What is wrong?" Alyssa asked.
"My NYADA audition is this week. What kind of broadway performer is in a wheel chair?"
"Well, you can be one. Don't let your condition get you down," Alyssa tried to rationalize with him.
"I have also been thinking about us getting home..."
"And?"
"What am I going to do if I am in a WHEEL CHAIR and we get home? What will I tell my dad?"
"I don't know, but we can think about that when the time comes."
"What about you? Have you been thinking about your future here? What if we can't get back?"
"Yes I have, but it is a surprise, I haven't told anyone about it yet."
"You can tell me, we are like best friends."
"I don't want to tell you, but you will find out soon."
"Whatever."
"I have good news," the doctor announced once he entered the room, "The muscles in your legs are starting to regenerate."
"Yeah, but isn't that just because I am using them in these stretches?"
"Possibly, but I believe it is a sign that you are recovering."
"REALLY!" Jeff squealed.
"So, is he going to start walking soon?" Alyssa questioned.
"Maybe, but it depends on him now."
"It depends on me?"
"If you push yourself you might be able to walk within the next few weeks."
"Isn't pushing yourself dangerous when it comes to your physical health?" Alyssa asked.
"Of course, but I simply meant that he should try to come to physical therapy everyday."
"Okay Alyssa, you're coming to my audition tomorrow right?"
"Of course."
They went their separate ways in the parking lot and headed home
"Kurt, Blaine told me that you were going to do Not the Boy Next Door for your audition, and I have to tell you, you're making a huge mistake," Rachel argued to Kurt at his locker.
"I need to be excited about this."
"It is too controversial."
"It was too controversial in 1962."
"I am not singing Don't Rain On My Parade because it is my go to song and it makes me cry every time I sing it, but because I have been belting it since I was two years old. This is the biggest moments in our lives, we cannot be taking risks."
"Isn't that the time to take risks?"
"Hey, what's up?" Jeff asked, rolling up next to Rachel and Kurt.
"Jeff, you must tell Kurt he can't sing Not the Boy Next Door," Rachel pled.
"Why can't he?"
"It is too risky, he should sing a safer song."
"I think he should take a risk, it will help him stand out."
"What song are you going to sing?" Kurt asked.
"The Book Report, from You're a Good Man Charlie Brown."
"Really? You're doing that?" Rachel asked, her face scrunched in distaste.
"I don't care what you think, at least it is unique."
"Okay, good luck."
"You too."
After school, in the theatre
"Kurt, you know how they say that knowledge is power?" Rachel questioned.
"Yeah?"
"I know who our NYADA educator is, it is Carmen Tibadeaux,"
"Carmen Tibadeaux! She is one of NYADA's most famous and infamous alums. Once she stopped a performance at the Met because a guy in the audience glanced at his watch!"
"You can do it," Rachel encouraged him.
"Kurt Hummel," Carmen called from her table in the audience. She was wearing a silk purple gown and a matching turban.
"Hello, I am Kurt Hummel, and I will be performing Music of the Night from Phantom of the Opera. Which I am sure you heard a lot of," Kurt muttered.
"That, The Impossible Dream from La Mancha and Being Alive from Company, yes."
"That is why, in the eleventh hour, I have decided to change it up a bit. I will be doing, Not the Boy Next Door from the biomusical The Boy From Oz."
Kurt: Comin' home used to feel so good
I'm a stranger now in my neighborhood
I've seen the world at a faster pace
And I'm comin' now from a diff'rent place
Though I may look the same way to you
Underneath there is somebody new
I am not the boy next door
I don't belong like I did before
Nothin' ever seems like it used to be
You can have your dreams, but you can't have me
Oh, I can't come back there anymore
'Cause I am not the boy next door
You've been savin' those souvenirs,
Faded photographs from our foolish years
We made plans, but they're wearin' thin
And they don't work out 'cause I don't fit in
And those mem'ries will just weigh me down
'Cause I got no place to keep 'em uptown
I am not the boy next door
I don't belong like I did before
Nothin' ever seems like it used to be
You can have your dreams, but you can't have me
Oh, I can't go back there anymore
'Cause I am not the boy next door
I'm not sorry for just bein' me
But if you'd look past the past you could see
That I am not
Nothin' ever seems like it used to be
You can have your dreams, oh, but you can't have me
I can't go back there anymore
'Cause I am not (Britney, Tina, and Mercedes: You are not)
I am not (Britney, Tina, and Mercedes: You are not)
I am not the boy next door.
"I am certain that Hue Jackman would have been as impressed with what you did with that song as I am. Congratulations and I commend you for taking such a risk today."
Kurt rushed off the stage.
"Rachel Berry," Carmen called a few minutes later.
"My name is Rachel Berry, and I will be doing Don't Rain On My Parade from my favorite musical, Funny Girl."
Rachel: Don't tell me not to live
Just sit an' putta'
Life's candy and the sun's a ball of butta'
Don't bring around a cloud to rain on my parade
Don't tell me not to fly
I've simply got to
Life's candy and the sun's a...
Her hand flew up to her mouth as her face flushed red.
"I'm so sorry, I've got to start again. I'm so so sorry. Just let me start again," she panicked.
Rachel: Rachel: Don't tell me not to live
Just sit an' putta'
Life's candy and the size a...
"I'm so sorry, I know this song backwards. Just let me start over one more time."
"No."
"Excuse me?"
"You get eight bars, I gave you sixteen. Do you know what happens if you forget the words on Broadway? They give the part to your under study."
Rachel begins to cry, "Please just give me one more chance..."
"Next."
Finn hugs Rachel and pulls her off the stage.
"Oh my god, what the hell was that?" Jeff panicked, rolling back and forth backstage.
"Calm down," Alyssa advised, "She choked because she was nervous."
"Rachel? Nervous?" Jeff laughed, "She has performed in front of thousands of people before, how could she be nervous?"
"It is Whoopi Goldburg, or some Carmen lady. Maybe she was worried due to her," she reasoned.
"I can't do The Book Report, it is a stupid song. I let my love of Charlie Brown cloud my decision."
"Then sing a different song."
"By the way, why are you back here and not in the audience?"
"Umm, moral support..."
"Okay, thanks, but you should really go take a seat."
"Alyssa Anderson," Carmen called.
"Wait, did she just say..."
"Surprise..." Alyssa walked out onto the stage.
"I'm Alyssa, and I am going to sing Tomorrow from Annie."
Carmen jotted some notes onto a pad in front of her as the music began to play.
Alyssa: The sun'll come out
Tomorrow
Bet your bottom dollar
That tomorrow
There'll be sun!
Just thinkin' about
Tomorrow
Clears away the cobwebs,
And the sorrow
'Til there's none!
When I'm stuck a day
That's gray,
And lonely,
I just stick out my chin
And Grin,
And Say,
Oh!
The sun'll come out
Tomorrow
So ya gotta hang on
'Til tomorrow
Come what may
Tomorrow! Tomorrow!
I love ya Tomorrow!
You're always
A day
A way!
"That was an interesting choice. Thank you for coming out."
Alyssa rushed off the stage and joined The New Directions in the audience.
"Jeffrey Jenni," Carmen made her final call and Jeff rolled slowly to the middle of the stage with Rosa, Alejandra, and Alegandra walking behind him in beautiful black dresses with golden sparkles.
"Hello, my name is Jeff, and I am going to be singing Good Morning Baltimore from Hairspray."
"I thought you said he was doing some Charlie Brown song?" Blaine whispered to Kurt.
"He must have decided it was a bad choice."
Jeff: Oh, oh, oh
Woke up today
Feeling the way I always do
Oh, oh, oh
Hungry for something
That I can't eat
Then I hear that beat
The rhythm of town
Starts calling me down
It's like a message from
High above
Oh, oh, oh
Pulling me out
To the smiles and the
Streets that I love
Good morning Baltimore
Every day's like an open door
Every night is a fantasy
Every sound's like a symphony
Good morning Baltimore
And some day when i take to the floor
The world's gonna wake up and see
Baltimore and me
Oh, oh, oh
Look at my hair
What "do" can compare with mine today?
Oh, oh, oh,
I've got my hairspray and radio
I'm ready to go
The rats on the street
All dance round my feet
They seem to say
"Jeffy, it's up to you"
So, oh, oh
Don't hold me back
'Cause today all my dreams will come true
Good morning Baltimore
There's the flasher who lives next door
There's the bum on his bar room stool
They wish me luck on my way to school
Good morning Baltimore
And some day when i take to the floor
The world's gonna wake up and see
Gonna wake up and see
Baltimore and me
(Rosa, Alejandra, and Alegandra: Yes, more or less we all agree)
Jeff: Baltimore and me...
(Rosa, Alejandra, and Alegandra: Someday the world is gonna see)
Jeff: Baltimore and me!
"What made you want to become a broadway actor?" Carmen asked after squiggling a few more notes onto her notepad.
"Umm, I like to talk in front of people and I love to sing."
"How do you plan on overcoming the challenge of being in a wheelchair?"
"Well, the doctor said that, if I try hard enough, I might get out of it this month."
"Good to know. Thank you for auditioning. All of you will hear from me within the next few months," Mr. Schue helped Carmen carry her things to her car.
"Hey Jeff, Finn is organizing a get together for the dudes, would you like to come?" Blaine asked as Jeff rolled down the ramp.
"Sure, can Alejandro, Jarrett, Ivan, Eduwiges, Sixto, and Ulises come too?"
"Yeah, it is tonight, in the choir room."
"Cool."
"Hey, Shortie," Alyssa shouted at Alejandra who was getting out of her seat.
"What's up?"
"I thought that you, me, Cristina, Bella, Alegandra, and Rosa should have a girl's night. I mean, the guys are all getting together, so why can't we?"
"Sure, where do you want to go?"
"Let's just meet up at Britney's and watch movies."
"Sounds like a plan. When do you want to do this?"
"Now, we are done with school, so why not?"
"Okay."
A few hours later, in the choir room
"Okay, so Puck is scheduled to arrive at the Schnider's pool at two P.M. So he should be there at three thirty. Sam, you are the driver, so you will stay in the car."
"Can I play with the radio?"
"Blaine, Mike and myself will triangulate an attack from here, here, and here," Finn points to a poorly drawn backyard and three stick figures.
"Is that a bear I'm hiding behind?" Blaine asked because the scribble looked quite similar to a bear.
"No, it is a bush."
"It looks like a bear."
"Maybe it is a shrub?" Rory suggested.
"What is the difference between a shrub and a bush?' Jarrett asked.
Update 5/11: "Oh, and Puckerman hates me, so why am I here?" Jeff asked.
"I thought you two made up?" Eduwiges questioned.
"We did, but we aren't best friends now."
"I don't think I have even met him," Joe added.
"Jeff, you said you graduated from your high school with straight A's and I thought you could help him study," Blaine answered.
"What am I supposed to do?" Artie asked, trying to determine what his stick figure was doing.
"That is the best part," Finn began, "you're the bait. When Puck comes through the gate you are going to roll your wheelchair into the pool!"
"What the hell is wrong with you people?" Alejandro shouted, "You are always making the disabled kid go into the pool."
The door to the choir room opened and Puck entered, "Hey guys."
Alyssa popped Mulan into the DVD player while the girls gathered on Britney's couch.
"Hey, I've been thinking..." Alegandra began, "We haven't sang a song together in a while. You know, just us girls."
"So you want to sing a song?" Rosa asked.
"We should," Alyssa agreed, "in fact, I know exactly the song that we should sing."
Alyssa got up and put a CD in the CD player.
In the choir room the next day
"Mr. Schuester, we would like to sing a song," Bella said and the girls went to the front of the room.
Alyssa: I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?
Alejandra: Yeah, I, I know it's hard to remember,
The people we used to be...
It's even harder to picture,
That you're not here next to me.
You say it's too late to make it,
But is it too late to try?
And in our time that you wasted
All of our bridges burned down
I've wasted my nights,
You turned out the lights
Now I'm paralyzed,
Still stuck in that time,
When we called it love,
But even the sun sets in paradise
Rosa: I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?
If happy ever afters did exist,
I would still be holding you like this
All those fairy tales are full of it
One more f-ing love song, I'll be sick.
Alegandra: Oh, you turned your back on tomorrow
'Cause you forgot yesterday.
I gave you my love to borrow,
But you just gave it away.
You can't expect me to be fine,
I don't expect you to care
I know I've said it before,
But all of our bridges burned down
I've wasted my nights,
You turned out the lights
Now I'm paralyzed,
Still stuck in that time,
When we called it love,
But even the sun sets in paradise
Bella: I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?
If happy ever afters did exist,
I would still be holding you like this
All those fairy tales are full of it
One more f-ing love song, I'll be sick.
Now I'm at a payphone
Alyssa: Man, eff that shhh
I'll be out spending all this money
While you're sitting round wondering
Why it wasn't you who came up from nothing,
Made it from the bottom
Now when you see me I'm stunting,
And all of my cars start with a push of a button
Telling me the chances I blew up
Or whatever you call it,
Switch the number to my phone
So you never could call it,
Don't need my name on my show,
You can tell it I'm ballin'.
Swish, what a shame could have got picked
Had a really good game but you missed your last shot
So you talk about who you see at the top
Or what you could have saw but sad to say it's over for.
Phantom pulled up valet open doors
Wiz like go away, got what you was looking for
Now it's me who they want, so you can go and take
that little piece of shh with you.
Cristina: I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?
If happy ever after did exist,
I would still be holding you like this
All those fairy tales are full of it
One more f-ing love song, I'll be sick.
Now I'm at a payphone...
The whole room was filled with clapping and the guys were wooting.
Last night, in the choir room
"Wait, what are you doing here?" Finn asked Puck, who took a seat at the piano.
"I just saw my dad. He wanted to borrow money."
"What did you do?"
"I gave it to him because I knew that was the only way I wouldn't have to see him again."
The room just stared at him.
"That is why I need to pass this damn European Geography test. I kept seeing myself as him sitting across from Beth, like him."
"Great, let's get started."
Rory pulls a map of Europe down in front of the white board.
"What is the biggest city in Ireland?"
"I don't know."
"Dublin," Ulises answered.
"In the UK, what three counties have the least amount of violent storms?" Finn asked.
"How the hell would I know that?"
"Have you even opened your book?" Alejandro questioned.
Puck just glared at him.
"Hartford, Hereford, and Hampshire," Jeff answered.
"Okay, here is an easy one, what area of Spain receives the least rainfall?" Finn quizzed.
"That is an easy one?"
"Just think about it dude. The rain in Spain stays mainly..."
"In the plains?"
"Yes, again."
"The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plains."
"One more time."
Puck: The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain!
Finn: I think he's got it!
Jeff: I think he's got it!
Puck: The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain!
Blaine: By George, he's got it!
Ulises: By George, he's got it!
Finn: Now, once again where does it rain?
Puck: On the plain!
On the plain!
Finn: And where's that soggy plain?
Puck: In Spain! In Spain!
All: The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain!
Eduwiges: Bravo!
All: The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain! The rain in Spain!
Mike: In Hartford, Hereford, and Hampshire...?
Puck: Hurricanes hardly happen.
Alejandro: How kind of you to let me come!
Finn: Now once again, where does it rain?
Puck: On the plain! On the plain!
Sixto: And where's that blasted plain?
Puck: In Spain! In Spain!
All: The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain!
(Hahahaha aaaahh haha)
The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain!
Finn: Again, where does it rain?
Puck: On the plain! On the plain!
Finn: And where's that blasted plain?
Puck: In Spain! In Spain!
All: The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain!
The rain in Spain!
The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain!
The rain in Spain!
The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain!