A Gift and A Curse

Chapter 2

The tears rolled down her face and she did nothing to stop them, the terror she felt absorbed her whole being making sure she was frozen in place.

'Oh dear God no…please no.'

She rocked gently, back and forth still staring at the test in her hands. "Oh Jesus Christ, fucking hell, shit, bollocks…oh my fucking God."

She allowed the test to drop to the floor as she buried her head in her hands. "Oh please don't be true…please, please be wrong."

Jane knew she would've probably continued her hysteria if it wasn't for the gentle knocking on the door.

"Jane…Jane? Is everything alright, love?" Mrs. Hudson whispered. How did that woman always manage to arrive at the most inconvenient times?

Jane wiped her eyes quickly with toilet roll. "Uh, yeah…yeah. Fine. Absolutely fine."

'But it's not is it? Nothing will ever be fine again, will it?' The voice in her head, that sounded a lot like Harry, hissed bitterly.

Jane stood up and opened the door slightly, showing only a margin of her face. Mrs. Hudson's smile dropped immediately.

"Jane? What's wrong?" Mrs. Hudson had adopted the same tone that Jane remembered her mother using when she needed to be comforted. Something, possibly the memory of her mother, made the tears leak from her eyes.

Mrs. Hudson pushed the door open slowly and stepped inside the bathroom with Jane. She proceeded to kick the door shut with her foot and wrapped her arms around the younger woman's sobbing shoulders. Jane allowed herself to be embraced by Mrs. Hudson and placed her head at the crook of Mrs. Hudson's neck.

"Shhh…Shhh, it's alright. Come on, sweetheart. What's the matter? Where's the test? What did it say, hmm?"

Jane waved her hand vaguely in the direction of where she threw the test. Mrs. Hudson led Jane towards the bath where they both sat on the edge. Mrs. Hudson knelt down to pick up the test but before she reached it, Jane blurted out:

"It's positive. Oh God, what am I going to do? H-how can I tell him?" Jane buried her head in her hands and shook as her body was racked with sobs.

Mrs. Hudson placed her arm over Jane's shoulders and spoke calmly.

"Jane Honora Watson, listen to me. This is not something to be worried about, you understand me? This is one of the most joyous things in life and Sherlock is going to share that joy with you. And, if he does not then so help me I'm bloody well make him."

Throughout the course of Mrs. Hudson's speech, Jane's body began to relax and slowly she drew herself up. Mrs. Hudson ran her fingers through Jane's curly blonde hair and smiled.

"There. Feeling better now?" Mrs. Hudson smiled.

"But it's not safe. How can we bring up a child in this environment? Sherlock won't change, he just never will and a child…would be too much of a shock to his system. And what happens when we do keep the child? We can't keep it a secret. It will be a target to get to us…people will try to get to us through it. There's only so much protection we can give."

"Yes…I can see why you'd be terrified but you can't deny that you haven't got any choices. You've got the British government on your side, darling."

Jane looked at Mrs. Hudson. "How do you -?"

Mrs. Hudson winked. "Oh, you'd be surprised sweetheart…not very much escapes me."

Jane had to smile. Mrs. Hudson was a remarkable woman and there was no denying it. Jane frowned and looked slightly nervous as she asked, "How much do you know?"

"Oh…enough. Now, enough about me. You're the one having the emotional breakdown on the bathroom floor. So…what are you going to do?"

"I have to tell him," She snorted. "I can't sodding well not can I?" Jane breathed out slowly. "How do you think he'll react?"

Mrs. Hudson shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. But you're going to find out."

Mrs. Hudson rubbed circles soothingly into her back.

"Hm…oh God…right. I better do it now then." Jane gave Mrs. Hudson a weak smile before standing up. She extended her hand towards Mrs. Hudson, who held it tightly.

"Wish me luck?"

Mrs. Hudson just smiled sympathetically and Jane took that as her cue to leave. She walked out of the bathroom and then it hit her how unreal the situation seemed.

They'd been careful hadn't they? They were always careful, each and every time, which to be fair, was a lot. For a man supposedly 'asexual' he wasn't half eager. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that he'd been celibate for so long. Maybe he was going through that 'desperate for sex' phase that most teenagers go through.

Jane giggled almost hysterically at the notion which was surprisingly true. She ran her fingers through her hair and composed herself before clutching the banister with an iron grip as she walked back down the stairs.

Sherlock had apparently not finished his experiment and was still hunched over the microscope. He did however tilt his head marginally as she came in. "How was the toilet?"

Jane shook her head in relatively good humour at the condescending git. "Fine. Yes…uh…Sherlock? I need to talk to you."

Sherlock didn't move an inch. Jane had labelled it his 'selective deafness' and generally the only thing that could bring him out of it was her being naked or someone screaming.

Well, Jane certainly did feel like screaming and was absolutely sure that she'd never take her clothes off for the bastard ever again again.

"Sherlock, I really, really need to talk to you. Now." To her annoyance her voice cracked slightly at the end but it did seem to get through to Sherlock. He actually turned his head towards her.

"What is it? Can it wait I'm in the middle of reacting –"

"Bugger your reaction!" Jane exploded. She lowered her head and breathed slowly before raising it again and looking him directly in the eye.

For a moment she could've sworn she saw something akin to fear flash in his eyes but in milliseconds it was replaced by his usual cool exterior.

"Alright," He turned his whole body towards her. "What matter would you like to discuss with me?"

'What matter would you like to discuss with me?' The voice or Harry mocked. 'Oh, I don't know…let's say the potential breakdown of your relationship?'

Jane drew herself up to her full height, which in all honesty was only five foot six but it still gave her the confidence she needed. That was, until she looked into his eyes.

She knew she was going to cry, she just knew it and right at the moment when their eyes met. She hadn't felt like this much of an emotional wreck since Sherlock's 'returned from the dead'.

Sherlock rose instantaneously and crossed the room in six long strides until he wrapped his arms around Jane and pulled her into his chest. Sherlock didn't comfort her with words, he never did and Jane honestly never expected him to but it was the beating of his heart underneath that grey silk shirt that calmed her in minutes.

Sherlock manoeuvred her backwards and pushed her gently into her chair. He knelt down next to her. He held her hand and drew patterns with his thumb over her knuckles.

He didn't speak, which she was immensely grateful for as it gave her time to regain what very little was left of her pride and composure. She sighed heavily. She decided to fix her gaze firmly on the chair because she knew she couldn't bear to look at him.

She couldn't bear to watch as her life crumbled before her very eyes, again.

"I'm pregnant." She whispered, feeling her heart tear in two inside her chest. "I'm pregnant and it's your baby."