BELLA
He's already at the door when I get there. We start walking. Edward keeps looking at me, but I just keep looking ahead. I want to get beyond earshot. Even if the house is completely soundproof, which it is, I don't want anyone who might happen to be in the yard to overhear us. He is waiting for me to start the conversation. Thank God for small favors, I guess. I'm careful to steer us away from the Full Moon Festival. Might as well get this over with.
"You lied to me," I say as I jump into a tree and sit on a limb. That's as good a place to start as any.
"Yes," Edward sighs. He joins me in my tree.
"You treated me like a child, like I was not capable of deciding what was best for me," I should be angry, but I just want all the drama to be over.
"Yes," Edward seems to only be able to say that.
"Not going to defend yourself at all?" I ask, getting annoyed.
"No," Edward answers. So he does know more than one word tonight.
"So, you don't feel like I deserve an explanation at all?" Now I am getting angry.
"Of course you deserve an explanation. There is no excuse, of course. But I was an arrogant, self-centered fool. If I could go back, I would change a lot. I know now what my behavior has cost us. I would treat you like the equal you are. I'm so sorry for what I did and how my actions made you feel," Edward sounds defeated. Damn him and his defeat, it makes me feel sorry for him. My anger once more melts away.
"I forgive you, Edward. But I think we should just try to be friends," I inform him.
"I can accept that…for the time being," he says.
"You might have to accept that for good. I just don't know if I can trust you. There's also the issue of treating me like the adult that I am," I respond.
"I know it will be difficult to rebuild your trust in me. And I have changed. I will treat you right this time around," he sounds confident.
"It's easy to fall into old habits. I don't want to go back to the way things were," I can't tell if he's really getting this.
"It will take time, but we are meant to be together. I'll stick around for however long it takes," Edward is really serious.
"We'll see," I concede…sort of.
"This time will be better," he assures me.
"Edward, I'm a Hunter. Do you know what that means?" I might as well get through this part out of the way.
"What?" he's curious.
"It means that, with Jen and Dakota, I take care of security problems," I start.
"Security problems?" he interrupts.
"I know that you understand the necessity in keeping the existence of immortals under wraps. Any immortal that threatens that security, in any way at all, need to be taken care of. Usually, but not always, that means that we have to silence them permanently. Some times, well every time really, they put up a fight," I pause here.
"Okay," Edward says.
"Riddle me this, Edward. What will you do when someone attacks me? Will you be able to let me handle it? Can you focus on another task if we need you to? Will you have the ability to restrain yourself until I actually need help? I should warn you though, that doesn't happen often," I inquire.
"I don't know. But I will try. I trust you to take care of yourself," Edward looks nervous.
"We can't have you mess up our well-made plans," I hope her really hears that.
"I know that. I really do understand how important your work is to you. And how important it is for all immortals," he seems to mean it.
"That's a start, I guess… if you really mean it, that is," I tell him.
"I really do," he assures me.
We sit in silence for awhile, each lost in our thoughts. I know it will take a lot of work, but maybe Edward and Jen are right. Some day a second chance at a real relationship could be a possibility. The anger is gone. That's good. Anger is not a healthy thing to hold onto. It can distract you from your own path. I fell…like a weight has been lifted. Damn, I guess I get cliché when I find inner peace. Jen and Dakota are going to have a field day with this.
The silence is comfortable. That is a good sign. I would be concerned if it was awkward. I mean, you should be comfortable with the man that you love. Yeah, I said it. I love him. I know that. So many people know that. But, trust is as important as affection. Just because you love someone, doesn't mean that you automatically end up with them. Not every romance is a fairy tale with a happy ending. I'm just sayin'.
"So…" Edward break the silence.
"So?" I look at him.
"Are we okay?" he can't help but ask.
"Okay enough to start a friendship…or at least try to," I answer.
"Like I said before, I can accept that…for now," Edward responds.
"We should head back," I land lightly on the ground.
"Do you have a curfew?" he is sincerely confused.
"No, but Jen, Dakota, and I need to start looking at possible targets," I start walking back.
"Ahh," he responds as he catches up with me.
We walk back companionably enough. Edward knows better than to try anything. He keeps a respectful distance as he lets me lead the way back. I hope that things really are different this time.