A Maka for All Seasons
By DarkAngel
Disclaimer: Soul Eater belongs to Atsushi Ohkubo. I'm just borrowing his creation for a bit of fun. :)
Author's Notes: This was inspired by an article I read in one of the Soul Eater fanbooks. The producers were talking about Maka and her mother, and how Maka was too young at the time to understand the complete story behind her parents' divorce. She still equates divorce = Papa's fault. I wanted to explore that theme.
[26. Blame]
When her mother tells her that she's leaving, Maka knows full whose fault this is.
As she watches her mother pack her bags, she bites down hard on the inside of her cheek to keep the tears back. She knows that crying won't make Mama stay; the only person that could possibly make her stay is that one that's driven her away; forced her into vagabondage. At least, this is the way the thirteen year old Maka Albarn sees things.
Mama is pragmatic as always. "I'll leave the spare keys with you so you can come home if you ever need to, though I imagine you'll be just fine." She stuffs a set of clothes into a duffel bag. She gives the albums on the bed some consideration before turning to her daughter. "Do you want to take the albums with you?"
Maka nods. It's all she can do. "When will you be back?" she asks.
"I really don't know the answer to that," her mother replies. And then she seems to realize something, because she stops her packing and sits down on the bed, patting the space beside her. Maka sits, her fists clenched between her knees. Mama puts an arm around her shoulder, her breath ruffling her hair and warming her ear.
"It's not your fault this is happening, Maka." She must feel Maka tensing because she adds, "It's not Papa's fault, either." She lifts her daughter's face so they're looking each other straight in the eye. "I'm going to be honest. This has little to do with him. This is something that I need to do."
Maka gulps past the lump that is suddenly threatening to cut off her air. "Do you mean a mission?" Shibusen sends a lot of its meisters on missions, even after they've finished with their weapon partners, after all.
"Not exactly." Her mother smiles, and despite herself, Maka smiles back. "But I will keep in contact with you. I'll send you postcards." She pats Maka's cheek. With a sigh, she stands back up and places her hands on her hips, giving the room a sweeping glance. There is something in her eyes as she does this, but Maka can't pinpoint what that might be. Regret? Resolve? Nostalgia? Maka takes a look around herself. The room has changed considerably; it had already been kind of strange once Papa had taken his stuff out. Now the room looked far too empty, devoid of life.
"Maka, I want you to do something for me."
"Hm?" Maka looks back at her mother, wondering what it is that Mama wants of her.
This time Maka can identify the look in Mama's eyes. It's love. The same expression she gets when she looks at Maka; the same expression she used to get when she smiled at Papa.
"Look after your father for me. I… won't be able to do that once I'm gone."
It's then that Maka realizes that her mother still loves her Papa, fool that he is. And Maka hates him all the more for it. How could he do this?
Papa loves Maka and Mama the best. I mean it. I really mean it! The words she's gotten so used to hearing that they've lost all meaning. Mama rarely says things like that, but to Maka, that seems more sincere than her father's frantic insistence. She shakes her head.
"I know you're angry," Mama says. "I won't tell you not to be. But Maka, you're our daughter – mine and his." Her smile now is warm; none of the sadness or anger she remembers from her is reflected in her face now. "Do you know why he works so hard at Shibusen?" Maka shakes her head. "He does it for you. I know I've been selfish, but I'm not going to deny him that."
Maka thinks about this. She doesn't understand. She does understand enough to know that Mama still loves Papa, and has a bigger heart than Maka herself does. Mama has moved past blame and into acceptance; it will be a long time (maybe never) before Maka herself can do that. But for her mother's sake, she nods and says, "Okay."
"Thank you, Maka."
As they leave the house together for the last time, Maka stops and looks back at the place she once called home. It won't ever be the same anymore. Up until now, she'd always considered this her home, and the apartment she shared with Soul, well, a secondary home. She'll have to give that up. Despite what Mama says, she knows that what she's lost is Papa's fault.
It will be a cold day in hell before she can forgive him.