A Maka for All Seasons
by DarkAngel
Disclaimer: Atsushi Ohkubo and Square-Enix have all rights to it. I'm just borrowing the characters for a bit of good fun. Bubblicious, Google and YouTube are the property of their respective owners.
Author's Note: This is for raelynn gross, who requested a fic in which Black Star gets gum stuck in Maka's hair, and Soul tries to help her get it out. (Sounds like something the Great Black Star would do. XD) Thank you for reviewing, m'dear!
It was a typical day at the DWMA. Students went about their daily routine of attending classes and taking missions. The maniacal sun rose in the sky, laughing hoarsely as it reached its noontime peak. In one of the many mazelike corridors of the school was a classroom, and over the door to this classroom there hung a plaque that read "Class Crescent Moon". It is here that our tale begins.
As we established in the beginning, it was a typical day. Professor Stein hadn't entered the classroom yet, and so the students chattered animatedly with each other. Maka and her group of friends were no exception.
"So I was thinking, we haven't had a party in a while," Liz was saying, waving her hand in the air in front of her. Occasionally she would blow at the fingers on said hand. She gave them a critical look, and satisfied, nodded before speaking again. "It's almost Halloween, right? What's Halloween without a costume party?"
"Or trick or treating!" Patti burst out, giggling. She kicked her feet repeatedly onto the desktop, stopping only when Kid reached over and pushed her feet back down again. "I bet we can get lots of candy this year!"
"Yeah! I bet I can get the most! I'll even share some with you, my loyal followers!" Black Star cackled, and he and Patti traded an overenthusiastic high five. Maka looked up to where they were all sitting, her eyebrows knitting together.
"But Halloween falls on a school night this year, right?" They had their first semester tests coming up two weeks from Halloween as well; and Maka would be damned if she got anything lower than an A. Liz rolled her eyes.
"Chill out, Maka. You won't get anything less than a B even if you slacked off and you know it." Before the younger girl could open her mouth to retort, Liz continued. "And anyways, we can always have the party on the weekend, right Kid?"
"Yes, I suppose we could." Kid answered distractedly, his eyes level to the pencil on the desk he was trying to align with the others. Liz rolled her eyes at her meister's distraction but nevertheless leapt on the permission she'd been (semi-consciously) given.
"Great. It's settled then. Bring your costumed selves to the mansion on the 30th. I'll see if anyone else wants to come." Her eyes took on a calculating gleam, and Maka knew she was thinking of one of the boys in the year above them that she'd been eyeing – the older girl had spoken of nothing else for days now. She sighed.
"Well, Soul? What are you thinking of going as?" But he wasn't paying any attention, as it was fully diverted by his best friend and partner in crime, Black Star. Said boy was currently being fed square after square of grape Bubblicious courtesy of Patti, and Maka joined Soul in staring in morbid fascination as the blue-haired boy's cheeks began to bulge, his jaws working furiously on the gum.
"Kyahaha! We're gonna have a bubble blowing contest!" Patti took a break from stuffing Black Star's mouth to clap gleefully, fully aware that she'd gained the attention of everyone in their little group, Kid aside. She kicked him viciously under the table, her huge smile never wavering. The young incumbent Lord Death yelped, pencils scattering everywhere. At that moment, several things happened.
As Kid dove to rescue his writing utensils, he shoved Patti, who windmilled her way onto Black Star, who'd just blown a massive bubble about three times the size of his face. The huge wad of gum rocketed its way out of his mouth and looked comically like a parachute dropped package as it sailed its way over the desk and landed right on top of Maka's head, where it promptly deflated and settled over her head, covering her in a thin film of purple.
No one spoke for several moments. And then there were the simultaneous sounds of angry buzzing, like a nest of wasps that had had their hive disturbed, along with the sounds of raucous laughter on the part of one pea brained ninja who had no instinct for self-preservation.
"Makaaaaa….
"CHOP!"
There was an awkward shuffle to the front of the classroom as Liz and Tsubaki attempted to lead an enraged and embarrassed Maka out to the girls washrooms. Stein's miserably horrible sense of timing ensured that he wheeled into the classroom just as the girls opened the door.
"Augh!" Class Crescent Moon was getting a show today, that was for sure, Maka thought sourly as she got up, rubbing at the bruise that would undoubtedly form from a head on collision with a crazed nutjob in a rolling chair. Could her day get any worse?
Liz and Tsubaki picked themselves up, the latter hovering over Maka nervously, checking to make sure she hadn't sustained any serious injuries. Liz glared at the oblivious professor, who was even now seating himself back in his chair, cranking the screw on the side of his head. "Ladies, class is starting now. What's so urgent that all three of you have to leave?" He raised his eyebrows when he spotted Maka and Tsubaki, expressing his surprise at seeing the two most unlikely candidates for playing hooky standing before him. Then his eyes landed on Maka's head.
"Ah. Will the extraction be requiring all three of you?" He leaned idly against the backrest of his chair, one hand coming up to crank his screw a few times. There were several snickers from the class, including, Maka noted furiously, from one unrepentant ninja who clearly hadn't learned his lesson. Her book went sailing over the several rows of desks and landed point blank on Black Star's forehead. The laughter immediately ceased.
"Yes, Professor. I'm sorry. I'll try to come back as soon as possible."
Unfortunately, it wasn't as easy as all that. The gum parachute was pretty much lodged in her hair and no amount of makeup remover, warm water or baby oil was getting it out.
"Tsubaki, I hope you've written out Black Star's will for him. I'm going to murder him!" If anything, she looked in a far more pitiable state than when this whole sorry affair had began. The left side of her hair hung to her head in wet clumps, strings of gum intertwined with the chunky strands. The majority of the gum had tangled with her hair so it looked as though ash blonde tentacles were mating with a purple blob. No Maka chop was going to cover what she had in store for that midget ninja wannabe.
The older girl wrung her hands together. "I'm really sorry, Maka-chan. Black Star does foolish things from time to time –" She shut her mouth at the blatantly patronizing look the younger girl shot her. "B-But he didn't mean it! He wasn't trying to aim for your head, or any part of you!"
She looked so pitiful, her big midnight eyes pleading, her brows knitted together so they created a hillock of apprehension between her eyes. Maka sighed. She couldn't be that angry, not when Tsubaki was giving her those eyes. How many times had Black Star's ass been saved by his sweet angel of a partner? But he's still going to get it, she thought darkly, as she glanced at her pitiful reflection in the mirror. His pain will be nothing compared with what I'm going through now.
Liz whipped out her cell phone to Google 'ways to get gum out of your hair'. Her eyebrows shot up, a small noise escaping her. "Huh. It says here you can try peanut butter or olive oil to try and get it loose. Have we got any of that?"
Maka opened her mouth to retort that the likelihood of a jar of peanut butter just lying around for them to use would be as slim as Sid coming to school decked out in her Black Dress but Tsubaki, surprisingly, raised her hand.
"I think there's some in Black Star's locker," she said. At the look the other two females flashed her, she flushed. "He just likes to have a snack around. You know… just in case."
They continued to stare.
"You know how his appetite is. If he doesn't eat once every half hour, he gets irritable."
There was a pause. "You know…" Liz began. "I always wondered where that smell was coming from." She took a predatory step forward. Maka's brain immediately caught on to what Liz was getting at and her eyebrows shot into her hairline.
The Japanese girl made a squeaking sound in the back of her throat. She held up her hands, though what she hoped to fend off Maka honestly couldn't say, because Liz on a romantic bone was relentless. She tried to fend off disturbing images of her childhood friend and her current best girlfriend doing… things… with peanut butter.
Ugh. Well, there went her appetite.
By now Liz had trapped Tsubaki against the door. "Come on, you can tell us. We won't tell a soul, will we Maka?" Tsubaki flung a pathetic look her way, her eyes watering. Maka sighed. "Liz, give it up. There are more important things to deal with for now." She pointed to the disaster zone that was her hair. She ignored the looks of disgruntlement and relief shot her way.
"I-I'll be right back! Please wait right here!" Tsubaki fled, her face tomato red. Liz sighed, leaning back against one of the sinks. "Thanks a lot, Maka. I was onto something, you know," she muttered, but looked apologetic when she saw her friend's laser beam glare. "Oh. Sorry. I guess I got caught in the moment."
Maka let out an explosive sigh. They heard the sound of light footsteps, and then Tsubaki came jogging in with a jar of half eaten peanut butter in one hand and a butter knife in the other. Maka raised her brows. She knew she shouldn't be sniffy about her options, but she had no idea where that knife had been. She reached gingerly for the peanut butter, looking at it critically. "Liz, what am I supposed to do with this?"
Liz tapped away at her phone. "It says you're supposed to warm it up and then spread it on the patch of hair the gum's stuck in." She thought for a moment. "I have a hair dryer in my locker. Hang on."
In the end they spent the entire class period in the bathroom trying to find a solution, to no avail. Maka ended up borrowing one of Black Star's hoodies from Tsubaki. There would be gum and gods knew what else stuck to it when she took it off, but it was the least the monkey could do.
Soul looked up at Maka with raised eyebrows when she came back to class. "You look stupid," he said flatly, eyeing her makeshift 'solution'. "You do know the longer you have gum in your hair, the harder it is to get out, right?"
"I know that!" she snapped. Actually, she hadn't. She'd been planning to suffer her way through the remaining classes until she'd heard that. She grabbed her bag. "Come on, Soul. We're going home."
He raised his eyebrows at her. "We are?" She ignored the question, continuing to pack books into her bag. "You never skip, Maka."
"I've never had a monkey disguised as a wannabe ninja spit gum in my hair," she snapped back acidly. Soul raised one eyebrow. "Touche."
They made it home in record time on Soul's motorbike. Normally Maka would have yelled at him about breaking the speed limit, but she was in desperate straits. Her partner's words kept reverberating through her head. While she was no means a vain individual, she was not going to shave her hair off because she couldn't get some stupid gum out of her hair.
As soon as they got home, Maka ripped the hoodie off. She could feel a resistant tug at the back of her head as the fabric of the hoodie played tug of war with her hair. "Soul, do me a favour? Start up the laptop and look up ways to get this –" She pointed to the disaster squatting on her head. "-off."
"Okay." Soul shuffled – far too slowly, in Maka's opinion – off to his room. Maka threw the hoodie over a chair in disgust.
A few moments later, Soul came back. He continued his leisurely shuffle right past her and into the kitchen. Maka, who'd been sitting at the kitchen table, craned her neck over to see what he was up to. Her eyebrows furrowed when she saw him reach into the cabinets for a jar of peanut butter and olive oil. "Soul –" Before she could finish her sentence, he'd taken the box of cling wrap out of the drawer and turned back to her.
"Let's go to the bathroom." He handed her the box of cling wrap silently, taking up the peanut butter and olive oil and marching past her.
They settled with Maka sitting on the toilet seat and Soul alternating between spreading peanut butter and olive oil on her hair. Maka wrinkled her nose at the scent. "I'm never going to eat peanut butter again," she mumbled. Soul chuckled softly. "I wouldn't want to either." They were silent after that, Maka trying not to fidget while Soul spread the peanut butter over her hair, occasionally pausing to pour olive oil over the whole thing.
"There." He looked from Maka to the sink. "Could you turn the tap on?" He held up his hands. "I'd do it but –"
She complied with his request and watched him wash the peanut butter and olive oil from his hands thoroughly. He was taking an awfully long time with that soap, and her scalp was starting to itch. "Soul…"
"Sorry. Almost done." He finally turned the tap off and reached for the cling wrap. He stretched out a good length of it before cutting it. She could only snort as he swore when it started to fold in on itself. After some tries, he'd managed to get a big enough piece. He carefully placed it over her head and began tucking the edges against her head. She raised her eyebrows.
"I watched a YouTube video. They used this technique where you make a kind of masque thing and then heat it up with a hair dryer. That lets the gum slide out more easily."
"Wow." She thought for a moment. "Thank you, Soul."
"Huh? For what?"
"For doing this." She gestured to the gloopy mess on her head. "For not being an ass about all of this." For always being there for me. But she couldn't say that, not without feeling even more uncomfortable than she already was, so she kept it to herself.
"It's no biggie." He yawned, stretching. "We'll just let it sit for a little while and then wash it out." He turned to the door. "Let me know if there's anything you need, yeah?"
"Wait! Where are you going?" Maka scrambled up from the toilet seat again, alarmed. He wasn't just going to leave her here with this mess, was he?
Soul raised his eyebrows. "You can wash that out yourself. Unless –" He grinned deviously. "Unless you want me to help, that is." His eyes roved suggestively over her figure. "I'd be willing to give you a chance now that you aren't so flat anymore –"
"OUT!" Maka screeched, throwing the box of cling wrap at his head. He ducked and closed the door behind him with a chuckle. She fumed. And here she thought he'd grown up. What an ass.
When she came out almost an hour later, Soul was sitting on the couch watching TV. He turned at the sound of the door opening. "You got it out," he commented simply.
"Yeah." She sighed. "Thank god."
She sat down beside him. "What are you watching?"
"Huh? Oh." He blinked at the screen. "Some kind of nature show or something."
Maka rolled her eyes. "What's the point of turning on the TV if you're not going to watch it?"
Soul shrugged. "I got bored." Maka rolled her eyes again, ready to make a comment when she stopped. If Soul was bored he would usually hole himself up in his room and listen to music, or else strum something out on his guitar. There was no reason for him to be out here, unless…
"What?" Soul frowned. "Did I get peanut butter on my face or something?"
"No." Maka shook her head. She reached over and grasped Soul's hand. "Thank you, Soul."
He flushed. "Hey, I said it was no big deal."
"Thank you anyway." She squeezed his hand. After a while, he squeezed back.
"You're welcome."
Things went back to normal over the course of the next few days. Tsubaki looked relieved when she saw that Maka's hair was intact on her head, a bit limp that first day, but looking much better than she had expected.
But Maka hadn't forgotten. Her eyes took on a sharp glint at the thought of the unrepentant monkey sitting some rows behind her. Even now he was laughing loudly about something he'd done at lunch – poor Tsubaki was trying to get him to shush, and Sid was glaring daggers at him.
As Maka took notes, she wondered just how she could get to the assassin.
Although he looked as though he'd forgotten the incident, he'd probably be on his guard. They'd practically grown up together, after all. He knew Maka just as well as she knew him. And contrary to appearances, Black Star had amazing Spidey senses when Lady Vengeance reared her head. She sighed, refocusing her efforts on Sid's lecture. That was when she saw it.
A bottle of Quench Ade. Bright blue. Just like Black Star's hair. Her mouth twitched.
It was almost two weeks after the Great Bubble Gum Escapade. By this time, everyone (including Black Star) had forgotten what had happened, and life at the Academy carried on as usual.
It was five minutes before the bell. Maka and the other girls were gathered together, talking about a new movie they were going to see that weekend. Maka only paid the scantest of attention, her focus on the blue haired boy sitting with Soul and Kid. At his elbow on the desk was his usual bottle of Quench Ade. He reached out a hand for it. Maka giggled.
"Maka?" Tsubaki's concerned voice floated to her. She looked at her best girl friend.
"Hm?"
"Are you all right?" The Japanese girl's eyebrows were knit together in concern, and her hand was twitching, as though trying not to reach out and feel her forehead. Maka nodded.
"Sorry, Tsubaki. I was just remembering something funny that happened the other day."
"Oh, okay." Tsubaki looked relieved as she let her hand fall to her side. Maka turned her attention back to the conversation. Stein rolled into class some minutes later, and they separated, taking their seats. Maka took hers beside Soul. For perhaps the first time, Maka regretted the fact that they didn't sit further back in the classroom.
Class went on as usual for the first ten minutes. The sounds of Stein's lecture and chalk scraping across the blackboard filled the room.
The first sign that something wasn't right was Tsubaki's whispered "Are you all right?" Maka kept her eyes on Stein, her mouth pressed into a straight line. Black Star mumbled something about being fine. Of course. He would be the last person to show even a moment's weakness, even in front of Tsubaki.
But no amount of bravado could overcome what Maka had put in that drink. She could hear the gurgling sound from where she sat. The sound of books being knocked to the floor at the force of Black Star's movements and the thundering of his high tops as he bolted out of the classroom was music to Maka's ears. The class watched the blue haired ninja depart, the door slamming open and reverberating through the room.
"I'm sorry, Professor Stein! I'm going to check that Black Star is all right!" Tsubaki bowed hurriedly before following her partner out the door.
"What was that about?" Soul said, cracking one eye open. Maka shrugged. She determinedly refused to look at Liz and Patti, who had identical shit eating grins on their faces.
"Dunno. Maybe he ate something funny for breakfast?"
Soul snorted. "Wouldn't put it past him. Idiot." He yawned. "Wake me when class is over. I'm going to get some shut eye."
Maka glared at him. "I'm not giving you my notes."
"Stingy." Soul clicked his tongue at her. Maka merely sniffed at and turned away. But she couldn't stop the smile that threatened to split her face in two. She could only imagine what sort of horrors Black Star was facing at that very moment. He wouldn't be returning to the class for the rest of the morning, she'd seen to that.
Revenge. It wasn't as sweet as all the gunk she'd had in her hair that day, but damned if she couldn't taste it.
It was delicious.
Addendum: Done! Holy hell, how long has it been since I started on this? (October, actually. Hence the Halloween theme. And now look, it's June!) I just couldn't find a good way to write this, and it probably didn't help that I've been absorbed in another fandom since last October.
I'll get around to writing the other requests. There may be delays, but I hope you'll stick with me. XD