I know I know it's been a while since I've done like anything and I'm not even gonna bother making a promise because I know I probably won't keep it. I just honestly hope that my readers love me enough to stick through the long gaps like these? Please? *puppy eyes*

Thin knuckles, trying to break through the skin, raw, dry skin, rapped on the wooden door in front of him. Fingers tinkered across his skin, up the nape of his neck, through his hair.

Crazy shit.

Axel couldn't contain the smirk on his face and he couldn't stop asking himself the same question. Why did he want a boyfriend so bad? It wasn't even a want, it was a need. A soul consuming longing to know that someone loved him, to know that someone needed him as much as he needed them. It was just something that made him feel good.

"Ax? What are you doing here man?" Reno asked as he rubbed his eyes and looked down at his watch. "Dude it's six in the morning. I work in a bar, I need this time to sleep." Axel merely rolled his eyes as he pushed his way into the apartment.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Anything." His brother replied as he closed the door, rubbing his eyes vigorously as he walked into the kitchen.

"Have I always been a uh...relationship guy?"

"Relationship? Like boyfriend girlfriend crap? Or uh boyfriend boyfriend crap in our case eh?"

"Seriously, can you remember a time I haven't thought I was like fucking head over heels for some guy?"

"Well I wouldn't say head over heels but there always seems to be someone in your life, yea." Reno answered as he swigged down a mouthful of orange juice. "Why dude?" He asked curiously as he ran his arm over his mouth.

"Dilemma. You're grotesque by the way." Axel added with a look of disgust as he sank down on the sofa. "No wonder Zack won't sleep with you."

"Hey! He's straight."

"So he says. Prolly just to keep you at bay." Reno pouted as he joined his brother on the couch, readjusting his boxers as he collapsed.

"Listen dude just cause you're having an existential crisis doesn't mean you can come to my house and be mean."

"Did you hear about Demyx?" Axel asked as he stared blankly at the television screen, nothing playing back to him, just a darkened reflection of the living room, a shadowed portrait of the two brothers sitting.

"Yea..." Reno said quietly and looked at his brother. "Is that what all this is about?"

"Kind of I guess. I mean not all about Dem...but there's this guy now but he wants nothing to do with relationships. In fact you know him."

"I do?"

"Yea. Roxas." Reno's eyes widened and he slowly slid off the couch, inching away from his brother. "What are you doing?" Axel asked with an amused smirk as he watched his brother try and escape him.

"Listen, I'm protecting myself. Last time we were both into the same guy I got my ass kicked."

"I'm not gonna beat you up." Ax rolled his eyes and nestled his head against the back cushion, raising his arms above his head and crossing them behind his neck. He did in fact remember what Reno was talking about. "Besides, I got the last one didn't I?"

"Don't you always get them?" Reno grumbled and pouted, crossing his arms over his chest like a defeated child.

"Buck up champ."

"No way. It's not fair. You got Demyx even though, even though I knew him first! I went out with him first but noooo. Axel comes home and sees me with a cute blonde guy and it's all down hill from there." Reno sighed deeply and shoved his thumb in the corner of his eye, an action Axel watched with a gentle grin.

"Yea but you have to admit. Me and Dem were good together."

"Whatever." His brother said as he stretched his arms above his head and stood up form the sofa. "The point is Axel you may think you can always get what you want but you actually can't. Yea, you got Demyx and basically everything else you wanted, but Roxas is different. I've known this kid longer than you have and he just won't budge."

"Have you ever tried to date him?" Reno shrugged as he scratched the back of his head, gazing lazily into the kitchen. "See maybe that's the problem. Has anyone ever tried to actually date him or has everyone just been using him for sex?"

"You make us all sound creepy when you say it like that." Reno replied with a grimace.

"Well you are all a little creepy." Axel smirked as his brother rolled his eyes. "Anyways, I'll leave. You can get back to your beauty sleep. You look like you need it."

"Har har. Get the fuck outta here." Reno said as he shoved his brother out.

"Later." Axel smirked and Reno rolled his eyes as he waved him down the hallway. He closed the door slowly behind him, leaning his bare back against it, hoping that conversation wouldn't disturb him enough to keep him from sleep. He rubbed the corners of his eyes again, sighing gently. He tried to make an intangible list of everyone he could remember seeing take Roxas home. Himself, Leon, Terra, Seifer, Lex. He was sure there was more, those were just the regulars. Reno clenched his shoulders, immediately feeling that familiar feeling of slight guilt, knowing it would build up. But just as he felt his heart start to sink into his feet, the door opened behind him.

"What the hell? Oh, hey man. Why are you up?"

"Uh my brother came by and woke me up." Reno replied as he watched Zack walk across the living room, into the hall and finally into his bedroom.

"Oh well are you going back to bed? I mean I don't care if you are but I just got off so could you like not make too much noise?"

"Nah I'm going back to bed, I got home at like five. Like I said Axel came by so I was just up." Reno sank back down onto the sofa and stared at Zack's back as he rifled through the fridge. "Dude can I ask you something?"

"Sure." Zack replied as he sniffed a take out container and put it back.

"Do you think I'm a creep?"

"What?" The tall raven haired man laughed and turned around to look at the sullen redhead. "Why?" He asked as he tried to restrain his smile.

"I dunno. I just..." Zack arched an eyebrow as he walked over into the living room and sat down next to Reno, making the redhead tense up and making his heart clench in his chest. Zack laid his hand on the other man's shoulder, making Reno look over at him with a quizzical expression.

"I dunno what you uh talked to your brother about? But you're not a creep or anything." He grinned as he gripped Reno's shoulder, not even noticing his reddening face, his legs crossed as he tried to keep his boxers closed. "Alright?" Reno just nodded and Zack nodded back with a grin as he stood and rested his hands on his lower back, staring down at Reno.

"Are you straight?" Reno blurted out and immediately regretted it. But instead Zack just laughed and leaned forward, planting his lips on Reno's forehead, causing him to close his eyes and hold his breath.

"I never actually said that." Zack whispered and merely walked back into his room, leaving Reno to stare blankly into space.

"What the fuck."

Anyways I hope that was worth the wait. And I know. I always seem to add more drama and twists and turns than is necessary but it just wouldn't be my style without it. =D