Chapter 18

If there's one thing Brittany Pierce knew all about, it was routines. Brittany had a thing about routines. She had to stick to them. If she didn't, she be late. She'd get lost. She'd lose everything she owned. She'd figured that out pretty early in life. It was ingrained in her mind at this point. Just like all the dance steps she had ever learned. Stick with the routine and everything falls into place. One move at a time. It had served her well. That was until Santana Lopez answered that fated phone call.

Santana Lopez was not routine. Nothing about her was routine. She didn't even have a normal routine. Not the same way Brittany did. Santana's life could be chaotic at times. Nothing was set. Everything was day to day. New plans. Roll with the punches.

Just Santana's inclusion was shaking up Brittany's life. Brittany would say Santana was like a milkshake. Like a marshmallow, caramel, extra whipped cream and sprinkles milkshake. Don't get her wrong, the milkshake was freaking delicious. It was the best milkshake she'd ever had, and she was fairly certain that it would be her favorite milkshake flavor forever. But, falling in love with a chaotic milkshake that's only available in New York meant she had to change her routine.

Wake up earlier. Check phone. Take a shower. Check phone. Get dressed. Check phone. Walk to work while checking her phone and dodging people and traffic. Switch to silent, which only made it more complicated. Will herself not to check her phone the entire time Blaine is droning on and on about demographics. Check her phone in the reflection of Artie's glasses. Sneak in a text. Make a quick call. Savor the twenty five minutes she can get around lunchtime. Power through the afternoon grind. Wait all night until Santana calls. Then do it all over again the next day.

The new routine was getting more and more exhausting. So, needless to say, Brittany felt like her life was a little bit topsy turvy. It felt like everything was changing really fast, and yet nothing was happening fast enough. Her normal routine was so off, that she found herself stopping completely throughout the day and having to remind herself what she was doing, where she was going. And when Holly Holliday sent her a memo to meet her upstairs in the executive offices, she was pretty nervous. She couldn't remember messing anything up lately, but anything was possible. She wasn't exactly the smartest cracker in the Triscuit box. She knew that was accurate, too, she had worked with some really smart Triscuit people a few years back.

Holly was kind of infamous for keeping people waiting. It was sort of her thing. The rumor was that she watched them sweat on her closed circuit security camera next door. Brittany didn't really believe that, but there were several red, blinking lights all over the place in there. She made a conscious effort not to look directly at any of them. She also went back over everything that she could possibly have done to piss Holly off and nothing came to mind. Thoughts of Santana were distracting, but she didn't think they'd been that distracting. Or maybe she was so distracted that she didn't even know how distracted she was.

To calm her nerves, she felt the best option was to entertain herself by thumbing through pictures on her phone. There were all kinds of her and Santana while Brittany was in New York. They looked really good together, if she said so herself. There were a bunch that Kurt had sent her that she referred to as The Cutest Thing Santana Did Today series. Kurt meant for them to be embarrassing, but they really just made Brittany fall in love with her more. There were dozens of Santana that she had sent every morning because Brittany was curious about what she was wearing or how she had fixed her hair that day. In most of them, Santana was making silly faces, but that was okay. That day's picture had Santana actually giving her a genuine smile. She was genuinely smiling back at her screen when Holly tapped her on the shoulder.

"Oh," Brittany said. "I didn't know you had come in."

"You seem distracted," Holly craned her neck to see the display, "Who's that?"

"Santana, my girlfriend, you met her at Rachel Berry's dinner party." She held her phone so that Holly could get a better look.

"Oh, yeah. I remember her stepping over me at one point. I think she refilled my flask with tequila," Holly studied her picture for a second and then gave her a wink. "Nice."

"Uh, thanks," Brittany said, not really knowing how to respond.

"She's hot," Holly approved. "I'd bang her."

Brittany gave a her boss a glare and quickly hid her phone away, "Yeah, let's...not. Ever. No."

"I'm just saying," Holly said with a double thumbs up. "Good job."

"Did you need to discuss something with me?" Brittany changed the subject.

"Oh, yeah," Holly gathered herself and walked around her desk to take a seat. "I was impressed by your work in New York, Brittany. I've been impressed by you for a while now, actually. If everything goes well with Whoopsies, and it will, I want you to be the new Creative Director around here. You'd oversee all the creative choices by all the teams. I think you're ready for it. No, I know you're ready."

"Really?"

"Yeah, really."

"Wow," Brittany was surprised. "That's an amazing offer."

"You're talented, Brittany," Holly continued. "You're great with your team and with clients. You have fantastic instincts. You're the right person for the job. Plus, I've been ready to retire Hagberg for years. If that old bitch tells me I'm being inappropriate one more time...I'm going to do something really inappropriate to her morning coffee."

"Uh...thank you...so much. For the offer, not for getting rid of Hagberg, but I..." Brittany looked all around the office trying to find the words to use next.

Holly's eyes narrowed, "I'm sensing some hesitation. And I'm pretty great at sensing things, I dated John Edward while he was still honing his gift."

"No, there's no hesitation because of the offer. It sounds great and I know I could do it," Brittany tried to explain. "I just may not be...available."

"Are you entertaining offers from other agencies?"

"Not exactly."

"Is is a money thing?" Holly asked. "We can sort out the money. You'll be well compensated."

"No."

"Hours?" Holly took another stab at it. "The hours would be probably be the same."

"I'm probably...I might be...I'm planning on mov-ing," Brittany finally spit out.

"Moving? I thought you'd been in Seattle most of your life, what's this about? Where are you going?"

"Well," Brittany straightened in her chair, "Santana lives in New York and well, I'll probably be moving there soon. To be with her."

"She's asked you to move?"

"Um, well, not exactly." This line of questioning made her uncomfortable. "She hasn't asked me yet, but she's going to."

"So, are you saying you don't want a promotion because your girlfriend might ask you to move to New York? How long have you two been together?"

Brittany swallowed, "Three weeks."

"Three weeks?" Holly exclaimed. "I've had drunken binges that have lasted longer than that, Brittany. I once did a kinky role play as Snow White while I lived with seven dwarfs in a Mexican shanty for longer than three weeks. I was stuck in a well as a child a whole month and lived on earthworms and little canfuls of water that they sent down with a rope and pulley system."

"That was you?"

"No, that was a lie," Holly admitted. "What I'm trying to say is...I know you're a lesbian, Brittany. I know about the urge to merge. I, myself, had the urge to merge with Ellen during our short lived romance in the late 90s. But, three weeks is hardly long enough to be considering a huge move like that."

"It's more serious than it sounds."

"Everything is more serious than it sounds at three weeks."

"We've known each other longer than that," Brittany said defensively.

"How long?"

That probably wasn't the best defense, though. "A few months."

"Oh," Holly laughed. "Do you go out there often?"

"Uh, no," Brittany bit her lip. "We've only met once, really."

"Just once?"

"...Yeah." This was quickly becoming one of those times that she got flustered and confused and couldn't decide the best route for escape.

Holly seemed to catch on, because she leaned on her desk and said, "Okay, how about we say the offer is on the table? After you finish the Whoopsies account, we'll revisit it."

Brittany nodded, not willing to say it probably wouldn't matter. "Thank you so much, Holly."

"Britt," Holly said as she opened the door. "You should really think about it. The position is yours, just...think about it."

"Okay," she nodded as she left the office.

The door hadn't even clicked before Brittany had dialed Santana's number. And, of course, all she got was voicemail. Her timing really sucked sometimes. Redial just because. Voicemail again. It didn't matter. It shouldn't matter. Santana was going to ask her.

Hours later, she was still telling herself it shouldn't matter. She'd worked really hard for this, but it didn't matter. She was comfortable here. She loved this city, it was her home. She loved Santana. She loved Santana more than anything, Santana was her future. It didn't matter. Santana was totally going to ask her.

If she moved to New York, she could get another job at another agency. No, it wouldn't be here, but change was good. She'd probably have to start at the bottom again. But, she'd have Santana. She'd kiss her goodbye before she left for work. She'd hold her hand while they walked down the street. They'd make out in movie theaters. They'd have dinner at Santana's favorite pizza place. She'd sleep next to Santana every night. They'd have a life together, because that's what she wanted. That's what Santana wanted. Santana was going to ask anytime. It was inevitable.

She had psyched herself up so much for the question that when Santana's name flashed across her phone unexpectedly, she almost answered with, "Yes, I'll move to New York."

She didn't.

Instead, she answered with, "I was just thinking about you."

"I was thinking about you, too," Santana laughed. "Wanted to hear your voice."

"Is it everything you thought it would be?"

"And more."

"What's up?" Brittany asked while rocking back in her desk chair. "Rachel otherwise occupied with Premiere Week stuff?"

"I guess so. Kurt has her testing earrings for reflective qualities," Santana answered. "I got away while no one was looking. I can't find it in me to give a shit about Premiere Week."

"Rachel would be mortified if she heard you say that."

"Oh well, I'm mortified by everything about her most days."

"San..."

"What?" Santana said innocently. "She's mortifying. Ask any animal or small child."

"Is that the real reason why she can't be in any of those feel good movies about dogs finding their way home?"

"She claims it's allergies," Santana said conspiratorially. "It's really because all furry beings hate her."

"I think it's her voice."

"I think she gives off a threatening scent."

"I can see that," Brittany thought out loud. "It is Rachel Berry's Golden Glittery Girl: Smell Like the Star You Are Parfum."

"So you got her care package?" Santana assumed.

"Yesterday," Brittany answered. "It also contained blu-rays of all of her movies, her cd, and 10 page letter about how great it must have been for me to meet her."

"No signed photo?"

"Poster size, but I gave it to Artie."

"Good, that shit will haunt your dreams, babe."

Brittany still smiled at the term of endearment, "So..."

"So what?"

"I have some news," Brittany said nervously.

"Okay."

"Holly offered me a promotion. Creative Director of the whole company."

"Oh," Santana said blankly.

"Yeah, it's a big step up."

"That's...uh..."

"What?" Brittany's heart was in her throat.

"Did you accept it?"

"Well, it's sort of an after Whoopsies kind of thing."

"In Seattle?

"Of course."

"Wow, Britt. That's amazing," Santana said with a squeak. "Of course, she offered you a promotion. You're a fucking genius."

"You think it's something I should consider?" Brittany asked.

"Do you want to consider it?"

"I wondered what you thought about it."

"I can't make that decision for you, Brittany," Santana told her. "Though, it sounds like you're already thinking it over."

"It's a great opportunity. I've worked really hard for a shot like this."

"I know." Santana's reply was barely audible.

"Unless..."

"Unless?"

"Uh, nothing," Brittany dismissed it. "I don't have to decide anything for a while."

"Yeah, you have a while," Santana agreed.

"A couple of months at least."

"Is that all?"

"Well, we're hoping to have Whoopsies all sewn up by the end of the year."

"Oh," Santana replied. "That's...soon."

"Yeah..." Brittany steeled her nerves for what she was about to do. "San?"

"Britt?"

"What are we doing?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well," Brittany paused. "We want to be together, right?"

"Yes," Santana answered. "Of course."

"Okay, well, we haven't really discussed how to make that happen."

"Because I'm not entirely sure how it is going to happen yet," Santana said. "It will. I know that. But..."

"But?"

"There's lots of things to consider, Brittany."

"Like?"

"Like...we both have careers. Mine involves the three ring circus that is Rachel Berry, but it's still my job."

Brittany ran her hand through her hair. She tapped her pen on her desk. Why couldn't she just say it. She'd move. She'd move today if Santana wanted her to. She'd catch a flight out right now. She wouldn't even pack, she hated to anyway. All she needed was the question. She had to hear it. She couldn't just invite herself into Santana's life and home without being asked, right?

"Yeah," Brittany said finally. "We'll sort it out."

"We will," Santana tried to assure her. "The important thing right now is that I love you and you love me and we have our routine."

"Our routine," the blonde repeated.

"It's working, right?"

"Uh-"

"Hey, I think Rachel is looking for me," Santana said suddenly. "She's shrieking like a howler monkey and stomping around."

"Oh, okay."

"We'll talk about some more, though."

"We kind of have to, Santana."

"And we will," Santana said. "I love you, Brittany. I'll call you soon. As soon as I can, okay?"

"Yeah, I love you, too."

Brittany disconnected and pushed her phone across her desk and stared at it. She was so tired of that being the thing that tied them together. It was just a stupid phone. She wished she could just chuck it out the window. She really thought this whole long distance relationship was ultimately a short term thing. She just knew that it would only be a few months. She thought that they'd figure it out sooner rather than later. How long was she going to have to wait to start their life? Why was Santana so content to wait?

She'd never had a stronger craving for a marshmallow caramel milkshake and Santana still hadn't asked.