EPOV

I lost my hearing when I was six years old. My father had beaten the sides of my head so severely … my ears that the doctors said I would never be able to hear again. Edward Masen the Fourth had been a trust fund baby with a nasty coke and heroine habit. Throw in Lizzie Platt's love for coke and they fell into a fairytale of self-destructive behavior. My mother and father everyone.

I once heard my grandparents say that the doctors that delivered me thought when I was born I would suffer from some sort of cognitive deformity, but I beat the odds. My first week of life I was addicted to coke and instantly ran me on a short course of phenobarbital. It was also when my grandparents, the Masen's, were notified they had a grandson.

Both my parents were forced into rehab and my grandparents were granted temporary custody of me. Lizzie and Eddie were in and out of rehab for years, embarrassments to my grandfather's law empire. My final trip to the hospital courtesy of Eddie gave my grandparents custody again.

I remember being sent to boarding school and being forced to sit in a room just my ASL instructor and me. I detested it, acting out as I threw various fits.

My father overdosed when I was twelve, my mother was found holding his lifeless body.

At his funeral is where I met Aunt Esme. They didn't know I existed until Grandmother Masen called for Nanny Platt to get my mother. I had never once been coddled or smothered with love until Esme and Nanny Platt. Nanny Platt decided to take Lizzie back to her home state of Washington to a facility for treatment. The last night of their stay in Chicago I wrote Esme a letter begging her to take me with them.

Nanny and Pappy Platt lived in Florida and Esme had just started nursing school. I didn't want to move to Florida and Esme was like the mother I never had. She fought for me and to this day, I would be grateful.

Forks was very different from the boarding schools of Europe I was accustomed to. I also found that ASL wasn't as common in this small town. Rosalie was the first person to ever talk to me and not judge me. Her grandfather was deaf so she and her brother Jasper knew how to communicate with me. Carlisle Cullen was the only other person who also knew ASL. He was the one who taught Esme and he soon became like a father to me.

I suddenly had a support system that I never had in my life people who genuinely cared about me. At school though my temper got the best of me, but Newton and Crowley fucking deserved it.

The day I hit Bella was the last time I had touched either one of them.

Bella.

Since that very first day of seeing her chomping away on her cereal, she had me. Then later that night I saw her topless. I wasn't a fucking pervert even though the peeping tom incident and Rosalie's fucked up threesome plan didn't speak very highly of me. She was absolutely beautiful. I had no idea how to act with her. I broke her nose. I fucking broke her perfect nose.

She was too good for me. Every time I saw her, I was reminded of that. I could see losing her father had been hard on her and her mother. I didn't want to complicate Bella's life any further. She deserved to be happy. Emmett McCarty made her happy and he made her laugh. Though I couldn't hear it, I saw Bella throw her head back in a fit of giggles.

The girl was turning me into a massive fucking creeper. I left her coffee, two creamers and one sugar she must have liked because she would be sipping at it in the school's parking lot each morning. The poems Esme filled me in on saying Bella's mom told her Bella was an old soul she was obsessed old literary works. I tried to express how I felt about her, only to act like an asshole.

You said it would work. I signed furiously to Rosalie.

My dick was back in my pants as soon as Bella's curtains closed. Rose was lazily buttoning up her shirt shaking her head.

No one was making any movement to explain what just happened. Alice was leaning on me laughing. I knew exactly how to remedy that, grabbing my laptop I typed. I bet Jasper would love to hear about this.

She glared at me. You wouldn't.

What was that dick squeezer? I cupped my ear for effect.

First of all that was Rosalie. If anything I'm a tit squeezer and I was making it look authentic. She paused and I shook my head. Have you ever been junk punched? She raised her pierced eyebrow.

As I was about to reply Rose's fingers gently tapped on my cheek gaining my attention.

It worked, trust me. She signed.

They looked disgusted, Rose. The plan was to make them jealous. I told you using Alice in this was too much. I started typing. My dick and your tits being exposed was too much.

Okay maybe I took it a bit far.

I think we took it very far.

This whole situation had spiraled out of control fast. It has always been hard for me to express how I felt and since Bella had moved to Forks, it was become increasingly difficult for me to interact with her. It frustrated me that I couldn't communicate with her as easily as I wanted to. Now she thought I was some kind of sex maniac.

Leave. I typed out.

Edward. She signed the sign of my name.

I stood up and took both girls by their arms guiding them out of my room. Rose stumbled and I could see Alice's lips going a mile a minute. Before I could shut the door, Alice gave me a quick hug and waved as I shut it on them.

My lights started to flicker and I knew Rose was pushing the button next to my door. I walked to my bed picking up my phone, texting Aunt Esme.

Rose is bothering me, please tell her to leave.

Kiddo, she says she's not leaving.

Please, Es…

My light stopped blinking and I sighed. I grabbed my smokes and lit up my cigarette. I puffed my smoke feeling some on my tension ease. Nicotine was love. I wasn't legally allowed to smoke, but Aunt Es said she couldn't scold me because she did it herself.

Carlisle was trying to get her to quit. I would always see him pull her cigarette from her lips and stub it out, giving her scowling face a quick kiss. Carlisle was slick like that.

He loved Esme and I knew he wanted to marry her. He showed me the ring he just wasn't sure how to propose. Esme wasn't one for romance she said she was a realist.

My phone buzzed.

Esme.

Your mom is downstairs.

I slapped my palm to my forehead.

Did I mention Lizzie visits every couple of weeks? Her sobriety had been very touch and go over the past couple of years, but she has been completely sober for two years. It was the same thing every time she came from Port Angeles. One look at me and she would start to cry. I didn't know if it was the guilt she had for everything she and Eddie put me through or the fact I looked like her beloved Eddie.

I grabbed my laptop and phone heading down to the living room. Esme was lying on the couch in a pair of Carlisle's Northwestern sweats and my mother was sitting in a chair fidgeting with her hands. Her strawberry blonde hair was piled on top of her head she was very thin, I wasn't sure if it was the drugs or if she was always that small.

I saw Esme's lips move and Lizzie's head snap up to me.

"Mom," I said.

I could speak. I remember talking just like I remembered hearing birds chirping in the early morning outside my window, cars humming down the busy Chicago streets, pages of a book when I turned the page. All those sounds would become just that, memories.

With my grandparents, if I needed something I would use my words I knew. I used to speak with Rose and Alice when I first moved here, but Alice once told me I sounded weird. I never spoke in front of them again.

Lizzie's green eyes began to tear. I moved Esme's feet and sat on the couch as she lounged. Lizzie started talking, she always seemed to forget, I glared and her lips stopped.

I tapped on my laptop and loaded it up.

Esme leaned forward touching my arm.

Take it easy, kiddo.

She doesn't try. I signed back.

Lizzie was scowling at Esme. I saw her lips say my son.

Now I'm her son.

Edward. Esme warned.

Lizzie said something else and Esme's shoulders slumped. She stood kissing the top of my head.

Hang with your mom.

I nodded.

We were alone, just me and Lizzie. She looked lost. I went to the window bench and picked up Esme's laptop. Instant messaging seemed to be our best bet. Lizzie watched as I set up the computers I made sure the program was opened for her too.

How are you? I asked looking up.

I've been real good. She smiled.

If she didn't look so worn out, Lizzie would have been beautiful. Her and Esme looked similar to each other except Esme could pass for more my sister than Lizzie's.

I heard you haven't been fighting. School is going well then?

I'm doing okay.

I saw Rose leave have you two finally made it official.

Rose is seeing someone and I'm not interested.

Alice then?

Alice is seeing Rose's brother.

Isn't he older?

And you care why? I look up cocking my eyebrow at her.

She blinked twice. I want to know you. You're growing up so fast.

How old am I?

You just had your birthday. You're sixteen.

Wrong. I'm seventeen.

This time when I looked up, she started talking at me.

"Se-ven-teen," I said slowly not completely sure if I said it right.

I was like this because of her. She could have stopped him. She should have left him. I was her child she should love me. I never deserved to be hit. They were high all the time. Our apartment was huge, but bare all the same. My room consisted of a twin mattress on the floor. I wasn't enrolled in school until I lost my hearing.

Every time she came here this happened. I only saw her because Esme insisted that she was the only mother I would have and no matter what I was her child. Carlisle has told me forgiveness is better for the soul. Maybe I didn't want a better soul.

Sometimes I think Esme wanted me to play nice just so Lizzie wouldn't relapse, which was totally possible.

I stood and went into the kitchen. Esme caught me by the sleeve of my shirt.

Did you at least try?

She doesn't know how old I am.

Esme looked up at me. I had almost a good foot on my aunt. It was almost laughable to look at us.

We go through this every time, Edward.

I need a break.

I hurried outside before she could protest. The cool fall air hit my face; the rain had stopped, which was good. I smacked my pack in my palm before pulling out a smoke. I should really cut back.

I saw movement from Bella's back porch. She was on the swing with her knees tucked under her chin. Her eyes met mine and disgust covered her features. She made to get up, but I didn't want her to go anywhere.

"Bella," I called.

I hoped I got it right. Carlisle had been working with me on her name for a while. I wanted it to sound normal. Her eyes widened as she froze. Even shocked she was beautiful.

I ran to where she was sitting. Her big brown eyes just stared at me. Her lips moved, but I couldn't quite make out what she was saying.

I'm so sorry. I signed.

She then shocked me by slapping me. Her jaw hung open and she covered her mouth. Bella's hand went from her gaping mouth to my cheek where she just hit. I flinched and she tried moving forward again. Something about being smacked like that hurt me. I remembered Eddie hovering over me, smacking away.

I stumbled back somehow getting down the porch steps. Bella kept moving forward, her lips kept moving and tears fell down her cheeks. I couldn't comfort her I couldn't even breathe. I somehow willed my legs to move, next thing I knew I was at Rosalie's house.

She answered the door in boy shorts and a ratty tank top. I pushed past her carrying myself to her room. I knew where her stash was. I grabbed a joint and lit up. She tapped my arm after I lounged in her beanbag chair.

You're face is red.

I don't want to talk about it.

And she let it go. Rose was good for that. We smoked and it was good. While it was good, I wished for things. Lately Bella had been one of my latest wishes; I just wanted to know her.

A/N: Maybe it was me, but I totally didn't understand some of the reaction to last chapter… So now that we actually have really met Edward… there he is! Dolphin62958 is my amazing beta and I'm glad she gives me her opinion! You all know what to do!