A Harry Potter Fan Fiction

I don't own Harry Potter or Rush Hour 2 or Hannah Montana (the driving episode)

Pre-Chapter Wind - First day of school. Noel is reminded not to show off by Dumbledore before she heads off to go eat breakfast. Noel finds out History of Magic is a total bore at Hogwarts. During Potions Noel takes pity on Harry and helps him out leading to both of their potions getting marked zero. Noel decided to confront Professor Snape after class.

-Students VS Teacher-

Flashback

I twirl around in my green chair in Sev's office, where was our usual hang out place was located. I was beginning to grow bored since he was too busy reading to pay attention to me, and I needed attention to survive, so I conjure a wizard's camera before finding the right angle.

"Hey Uncle Sev. Are you going to look up?" I ask.

"Are you going to take my picture again?" He asks not looking up from his newspapers.

"No…maybe."

"Then no."

"Not even for your favorite Niece in the whole wide world?"

"I'm your Godfather Noel, not your Uncle."

"Aww, but I'd rather you be my Uncle. It's more funner and you'll love me more if we're family." I mope. He looks up from his paper, but doesn't lower it so I could only see his eyes. I pout at him. "Come oooooon." I whine. "Please!"

"Fine, but I better not find it lying around anywhere and we won't be like this when school starts. You wouldn't want to blow our cover would you?" He says, now lowering the paper, and flashes me my favorite grin of his. Yes he can smile, but only for the people he likes...which are rare and few.

"I know." I say before snapping the picture.

End of Flashback

"Oh, okay. Sorry about that." I apologize.

"And?"

"Sorry for the teasing."

"Good."

"Well since everything's settled, I'll leave you to your lunch." I say, leaving the Dungeons to head over to the Great Hall in time to see Harry storm off angry. I bet Ron and Hermione were at it again. Seriously, they were always fighting like an old married couple. Well...fighting equals hate and hate equals lust and lust equals love. OMG they must love each other deep beneath the food and books. How cute! Off in my own thoughts, I don't notice Harry stopping suddenly and I walk into his back with a bang, causing me to fall back and land on my bum.

"You were following me." Harry says, turning around to face me.

"Not on purpose. I got wrapped up in my thoughts and forgot what I was doing. It happens daily." I say and Harry helps me up. "You looked mad. Let me guess…does it have something to do with Ron and Hermione?"

"They're always bickering about things they don't understand or stuff that's not important." Harry says frustrated. "It gets on my nerves at times so I just left."

"At least Ron's not gay and is in love with you so that's why he's always bickering with Hermione because he thinks she loves you which she does." I joke in a mumble. It so wasn't true, but was fun to say and imagine up.

"What?" Harry asks confused.

"…nothing." I say. "But Harry, a wise man once told me that friends may act dumb, but they're not stupid."

"Ha. Funny." Harry laughs. I look around to see we ended up in the North Tower. "Thanks anyway." The bell rings and a silver ladder descend upon us through a trap door. We go inside and sit on the chairs at a table. Ron soon enters after and joins us.

"Harry we're sorry for fighting all the time because that's how we are, but you have to stop taking your temper out on us." Ron apologizes.

"Sorry." Harry apologizes back. Professor Trelawney, teacher of Divination, then enters the room.

"Welcome back dears. You will find a copy of The Dream Oracle, by Inigo Imago on your desk. Please turn to the intro to see what Imago has to say on the matter. Then use The Dream Oracle to interpret each others most recent dreams at your desk." Trelawney says.

"You say something. I don't remember my dreams." Ron says.

"I bet you remember some of them. The special ones." I murmur flipping the pages of the book.

"I don't." Ron blushes.

"Right…" I say. "Except the special ones."

"What about you Noel? Have any special dreams lately?" Ron asks.

"That's none of your business, but not lately." I say.

"Then why ask me?"

"Because I thought it would be funny to see you get all embarrassed."

"It wasn't funny, but I honestly don't remember my dreams."

"Neither do I."

"Make something up." Harry says.

"Fine. I HAD A DREAM…" I start in a loud voice. "THAT BLACK PEOPLE AND WHITE PEOPLE AND ELF PEOPLE AND MERPEOPLE PEOPLE AND EVEN CHINESE PEOPLE COULD GAMBLE TOGETHER WITH THE SAME NUMBER OF CHIPS!" I finish with a huge grin on my face. In the next table over Neville and Dean were laughing hysterically.

"I predict-" Harry says in an ominous voice. "-that you and Hermione will start a casino on Diagon Alley filled with black people and white people and elf people and merpeople and even Chinese people, but they will gamble with different number of chips and you will be forced to be happy about it."

"Oh no! Different number chips? The horror!" Our table two erupts with laughter, and Trelawney looks at our tables in disapproval.

"What about you Harry?" I ask him as we quiet down.

"I had a dream that a famous singer who was in disguise got picked up by a police man named Diarrhea." Harry says.

"That's not possible." Ron says. "Who would in their right mind keep a name like Diarrhea?"

"I know right? I bet you were thinking something weird before you went to bed Harry." I say trying to look in the book to interpret it.

The bell rings for the end of class an hour later and we walk quickly to DADA. I pull out my wand on the way there to save time. I couldn't wait to get to learning some good old DADA.

"Nice wand." Ron says. "What is it?"

"My core is special." I say as Hermione joins us coming from Arithmancy?. "I have a Unicorn hair and a thread from a Dementor's cloak as my core. They are like opposites in one wand." I say as Hermione's eyes widen.

"They only had one of those made fifteen years ago as a test wand. But only until four years ago, no one was compatible with in a way that no one was able to wield it for more that a moment before the wand rejected the holder. It's a really powerful wand." Hermione says shocked.

"How did you know that?" Ron asks amazed.

"Because I read." Hermione snaps as we enter class. "In the Library."

"We have a Library here? Where is this magical place?" I joke in a whisper as I sit down. Umbridge stands in the front of the classroom.

"Wands away and quills and parchments out please." Umbridge says in a sweet voice that sounded so fake, but I reluctantly shove my wand into my pocket to take out my quill and parchment. Umbridge pulls out her wand from her purse and taps the board on the front of the class to make words appear. "Copy this and when you're done take out your copies of Defensive Magical Theory by Wilbert Slinkhard and wait for further instructions." After a few minutes people finish coping down the notes and pull out their books. "Okay now turn to page five and read Chapter One. There will be no talking." Hermione raises her hand. I look at her curiously before turning to read the chapter very slowly, trying to take in each word. This was so boring, so I look around to find something better to do when I notice Hermione's hand was still raised and Umbridge was looking at anywhere but her. The whole class was now staring at Hermione. Wow! She must have some strong upper body strength to keep her hand up that long, I bet it's because she's always reading and must carry heavy books. "Did you want to ask something about the chapter Miss Granger?" She asks as though she just noticed her. I bet she finally gave up avoiding looking at her.

"Not about the chapter no." Hermione says.

"Well we're reading now." Umbridge says. Hermione opens her mouth to say more but Umbridge turns away, and I raise my hand. After eight long minutes, just when I was about to give up, she turns to me. "Yes Miss Dumbledore?"

"I think Hermione had more to say and it's very rude to move on before she's done. Aren't teachers supposed to set examples for their students? I bet if you listened to her she would have said that this chapter doesn't even say anything about using the spell and that's what DADA is for." I say quickly before she could interrupt me. I didn't have to read Hermione's mind to know that's what she wanted to ask. Anyone who read chapter one would be asking the same question as well.

"You aren't going to need to use defensive spells in this class." She states with a laugh. Oh no she didn't! Did she just laugh at me? She did not just laugh at me like I was a little kid who just said something stupid. I feel myself getting irritated.

"We're not going to use magic?" Ron asks loudly.

"Hand Mr. Weasley." Umbridge says.

"We're not going to use magic?" Ron asks again thrusting his hand into the air.

"No you're-" Umbridge starts.

"Why not?" I ask angrily interrupting her while raising my hand into the air.

"If you study the theory long enough-" Umbridge starts again.

"How's theory going to help out in the real world?" Harry interrupts her loudly with his fist in the air.

"This is school Mr. Potter, not the real world. There's nothing out there." Umbridge says softly. She was blatantly lying to our faces. How can be nothing out there in the real world? The real world was not crapping cotton candy, rainbows, and roses.

"What a load of crap." I say bluntly. "The world is a dark place out there filled with dark people and by dark I mean evil dark not skin dark."

"Noel…" Hermione hisses.

"And by evil she means Voldemort because Voldemort is out there!" Harry shouts. The class goes ghostly quiet. He just said Voldemort twice in once sentence. That is badass.

"Ten points from Gryffindor, You've been told by your headmaster that a certain Dark Wizard has returned. This is a lie." Professor Umbridge says standing up.

"It's not a lie." Harry and I shout.

"You don't have proof that Moldybutts not alive, the Ministry is just covering up to keep the people hopelessly clueless while you reap the benefits of power and gold. Besides, my Great Grandfather trusts us enough not to lie to our faces unlike you." I say glaring at her.

"I saw and fought him. Isn't that proof enough he's back?" Harry says.

"See. If they say he's back then what more proof do you need?" I demand.

"Detention Potter, Dumbledore tomorrow evening. Five o'clock. In my office. I repeat, it's a lie."

"You can take that detention and shove it up your-" I start before Hermione vaults over to cover my mouth.

"You can say Cedric just dropped dead last year. Voldemort murdered him." Harry shouts. No fair. I don't see Ron covering his mouth to stop him from talking. Why I ought to jump over and punch her in the face!

"Miss Granger let go of Dumbledore. You two up here." Umbridge says returning to her fake voice. We walk up to her desk, as she begins to write a note. She closes it with her wand. "Take this to Professor McGonagall dears." She says. I snatch the scroll from her hands, shoving my things into my bag, and stomp out of class followed by Harry.

"What a liar." I say with a huff.

"I know." Harry says. "I'm glad someone believes me." Peeves the Poltergeist Ghost floats by, and throws the things he was carrying at us. "Not now Peeves." Harry growls.

"Crackpots cranky." Peeves laughs raising another thing to throw.

"I wouldn't do that." I warn raising my hand up a little. Peeves glares at me before angrily flying off, swearing loudly. He didn't like me that much because I could hurt him. It was his fault really for setting off a dungbomb in the bathroom while I was trying to take a bath this summer. I didn't know I could actually hurt him when I yanked off a toilet seat at threw it at his head. We enter McGonagall's office and I give her the note. She opens it with her wand and reads it.

"Is this true?" McGonagall asks shocked.

"Define true." I say.

"You shouted at her, implied she was a bad teacher, swore at her, told her you-know-who is back, disrupted her class…and tainted the Ministry's name." McGonagall reads off the note.

"Then yes." I say.

"I am very shocked of you Noel. I had thought you learned how to control your temper like your Great Grandfather."

"That's not fair. He's like 150 years old and I'm nearly 15 years old." I state. She shouldn't have laughed at me, I don't like being laughed at so when that happens I get so riled up and then I just blow my lid. It's PTS from when I got teased and laughed at for being a little different in Elementary school and instead of using my magic on the kids I got angry instead to deal with it. Mom said she would rather me get angry then use my magic on people.

"Noel now's not a good time to be joking. You both have detention every evening this week." I groan. "Starting tomorrow."

"Professor McGonagall couldn't you do something?" Harry asks.

"No I can't. Now you two go down to the Great Hall for dinner." She says and the bell rings a few seconds later. We walk out of her office glumly, both of us not in the mood to be eati at the moment.

"Harry this sucks. I can't believe we're getting in trouble for telling the truth. Detention with that damned Umbridge… I'd rather have detention with Snape." I say.

"Me too." Harry admits.

"So you like Snape?" I ask.

"He's better than Umbridge and I've known her less. I'd rather not have either. If I had to choose I'd pick the lesser of the two evils." Harry says. It annoyed me that he thought Severus was evil, but I knew Severus was really cold toward Gryffindors and was especially cold towards Harry.

"Wow…that was deep man. That hit me deep." I say slapping my chest. "Ouch."

"Yeah I read that in a fortune cookie." Harry laughs.

"Does this mean...since we are united under a common enemy and hang out with one another between classes...are we friends?" I ask.

"I think we are." Harry smiles.

"With benefits?"

"What?" He chokes turning red.

"Just kidding." I snort.

AN: Yup...it was a day off today, and it's going a lot slower than I imagined...didn't get to sleep in thanks to my annoying ball of furry nuisance.
AN2: Oh right, did anyone see the new Doctor who on Satursay? Eggs...eggs...eg...EX-TER-MI-NATE!