Stephenie has it all. I just decided to play with her characters and add some of mine.
Beta'd by TeamAllTwilight.
Enjoy some more Daddyward. This time he gets in trouble. ^_^
This chapter takes place before the chapter I posted on Monday...but Abby's in the same age span - around three y. o.
EPOV
After spending my morning in the gym, I couldn't wait to get home, shower and relax in front of the TV.
Of course, it didn't work out like that.
When I stepped inside the house, Bella was telling Abby something about me and never checking if my phone had battery. Shit. Did she call? Did my phone die?
I went to the kitchen where they were talking, more like yelling, making them turn their attention to me.
"Hey," I whispered, gauging from Bella's face in how much trouble I was.
She looked pissed. "Finally! Where's your phone, Cullen?"
She rarely called me Cullen these days. That meant I was in trouble. Heaps and heaps of trouble.
"Uh, here?" I asked, searching in my pockets and coming out with it. I pressed the screen and nothing happened. Shit. "It's…dead. I'm sorry."
"If I wasn't in such a hurry, you'd be dead!" she hissed, storming out of the kitchen, muttering about me.
"I don't know how it happened! It had battery this morning!" I protested, following her.
"That was four hours ago! And how much battery did it have?" She whirled around, glaring. "Look, I have to be on the other side of the city in like half an hour. This is very important. I don't wanna talk about your stupid phone now." Bella marched to our bedroom and slammed the door in my face.
Great. It wasn't my fault.
And she wasn't one to talk! She never had her damn phone around when I called.
"Awe you fighting?" Abby mumbled.
I completely forgot about her. "Of course not." I turned to her then crouched to her level. "Mommy's just a little upset she couldn't reach me," I explained.
"A little upset?" Bella screeched from behind me making me jump, startled. "Give me the car keys." She extended her hand, wriggling her fingers. "And can you take care of yourself and Abby for a few hours? I won't be gone too long."
"We won't get in trouble. Right, little bit?" I gave Abby a serious look. She nodded enthusiastically.
"Okay. Food's in the fridge. And make her sleep at least an hour," Bella instructed me.
I walked her to the door and tried to apologize again, but all I got was a peck on my cheek and a wave goodbye. I'd grovel tonight.
After locking the door, I turned around to find Abby watching me expectantly.
So much for my leisure day.
"You hungry?" I asked, picking her up. If I fed her then put her to a nap, I could lay down for a while too.
"Yep. But I don't want the sauce," she said pouting.
"Okay, no sauce." I had no idea what Bella cooked.
After a little snooping around the kitchen I found pasta with red sauce and some soup. And there we cookies too. I was tempted to start with the dessert.
"So you don't want pasta?" I asked to make sure.
"Nope! I want cookies." She threw me her killer smile.
Bella wasn't home. I wanted cookies too.
"Go and choose a cartoon," I urged her while I poured soup in two bowls then grabbed the plate with biscuits.
When I made it to my bedroom, Abby was clutching a DVD, beaming at me. I knew what we were watching from that smile.
"What do you have there?"
"Nemo!"
"Can't we watch something else? I bet you know the lines by now, Abby," I pleaded her.
Even cartoons lost their charm with her. She watched the same thing until she got bored – that usually happened after the fiftieth time.
She sighed and shuffled out of the room. Really? I stared amused after her. We were going to have a change. Finally.
While Abby searched for another movie, I fired up the laptop and arranged our spot on the bed. In times like these I knew why Bella loved to have ten pillows.
When Abby returned with her movie choice, I had to laugh. It was only Mom and Dad's fault for buying the book and movie.
With a scowl, I inserted the Wizard of Oz movie in the laptop and picked Abby up, depositing her on my lap. She made herself comfortable against my chest while the movie started.
"Try not to spill the soup on the bed or us, okay?" I requested. She usually insisted to hold the bowl, got distracted by the movie and the soup would pour on us. It was my fault, too for not making her eat at the kitchen table, but I knew she loved to watch cartoons while eating. Who doesn't?
By the time the movie was done, half of the cookies were eaten and Abby was fast asleep in my arms. I didn't want to move her too much so I put her on Bella's side of the bed, closed the laptop and went to clean the dishes then take a shower.
When I returned to the bedroom, I decided to sleep too only to remember about my dead phone. I plugged it in quickly, hoping Bella hadn't tried again to reach me.
I didn't get to sleep much because the phone started ringing just as sleep was about to take me. Dammit. It better be good.
Through half open eyes I saw it was Alice. Great.
"Hi, Alice," I mumbled.
"About time one of you decided to answer!" she screeched.
"What? Bella's probably in a meeting or something. I'm home," I explained, yawning. Damn, my sleep was long gone.
"Oh, she's busy… Oh, well! You can help," she added cheerfully.
"What can I do?" I wondered.
"Do you remember the times Mom left us alone with the neighbor, Zafrina?" Alice asked curiously.
"Vaguely. Why?"
"And you remember how we misbehaved on purpose?" she added.
"I don't get it. Where are you going with this?" I moaned. All I wanted was an hour of sleep.
"You don't get it? It's Friday! It's March twenty-third!" she yelled in my ear.
"Whoa, Alice!" I protested, putting the phone away. "I know what day is it."
"You don't apparently. It's their day! Emmett is taking Rose away for the weekend."
"What day?" I was confused. What was so important about this day?
"Oh my God, Edward! It's their ten year anniversary! Ten years ago, Emmett got the balls to ask Rose out!" Alice shouted.
"Oh. Okay," I mumbled. Sadly, I had no idea of that until she told me a moment ago. "But what do you want from me?"
"We're babysitting! Or we were supposed to babysit until Jazzy bailed out on me! I'm stuck with two demon kids."
Oh. "Why didn't you say so from the beginning?" I muttered.
"I thought you'll realize what's going on," she said sarcastically.
"I'm sorry I'm not a mind-reader, sis." Damn, women were so confusing. "So what do you want from me? I can't exactly help you from here."
"I need a few advices. And…I need to cook," she added in a whisper.
"Holy fuck! Don't kill their kids! We're going to hang up now and this conversation never took place. I'm not an accomplice in Rick and Nick's deaths," I said hurriedly and very seriously.
"Edward! Have some faith! I've learned how to cook."
"Oh, that's a relief," I mumbled. With the corner of my eyes I saw movement and when I turned my head to see what was going on, I found Abby preoccupied. She was snooping through Bella's nightstand drawer. "Hey, what are you doing?" I inquired making her jump and give me smile. "Hold on, Alice," I whispered in the phone. "Abby, what do you need?"
"Nofing." She shrugged.
"Then what are you doing with Bel… mommy's stuff?"
"Looking…it's pretty."
I had no idea what Bella's nail polish was doing there but if that fell and ended up on the floor…
"You still there?"
Shit. Alice. "Yeah, sis," I answered, keeping my eyes on Abby. "Sorry, but you're not the only one stuck with evil kids."
"Oh, I bet you have it easy. Abby's one and a girl!" she protested.
"You have no idea what her little brain can cook up sometimes. Watch out!" I lunged for the small bottle of nail polish.
For how long had she been awake?
"Is everything okay there?" Alice asked worried.
"I've got it under control." I hope. "What do you really need, Alice?" I asked.
"Well, I need the recipe for roast chicken Bella uses. She told me about it once and…"
"Uh, I don't know it," I told her. "But I think it's written down in our notebook."
"You have a notebook with recipes?" she asked surprised.
"Yep. Why is that strange?" I muttered getting out of the bed and walking to the kitchen.
"That's so…I dunno…old fashioned. We have cookbooks nowadays," she teased me.
I rolled my eyes and snatched the notebook from its spot before going back to the bedroom. "Do you want this or not?" I muttered.
"Course I do. Let me grab something to write with."
My eyes widened when I found Abby going though my drawer. I rushed there worried of what she could have found.
"Why are you taking my stuff out of the drawer?" I demanded, trying to put everything back. Thankfully, she hadn't gotten to the forbidden things.
"Nooo!" she screeched then slapped my hand before taking out the change and notes I had in there. She turned to put them on the bed.
Then I saw that all of Bella's stuff was spread on the bed and now mine was getting the same treatment. I had a crazy kid.
"I'm back," Alice said in my ear scaring the crap out of me. I had forgotten about her.
"Okay…." I started reading the recipe, but keeping an eye on Abby.
Maybe, just maybe, there weren't any condoms, although the rational part of my brain told me that there were cause I had used one last night. Fuck. I rubbed my temple, watching as Abby took stuff out of my drawer only to put it on the bed.
I had just finished telling Alice about the recipe when the much awaited box appeared. How do I take it without having a tantrum from Abby?
"Alice, I have to go now."
"Oh, I was just going to ask what I can do to keep them entertained," she mumbled.
"You can watch some movie. Ask them what they like and watch that. Play some games. I dunno."
"You dunno? Seriously? You want me to believe?"
"Alice, I usually go with the flow. Like now… I'm trying to understand why she's emptying our drawers on the bed, but yeah… She can do it." I shrugged.
When Abby returned to my probably empty drawer, I snatched the condoms box making her turn to me with inquisitive eyes.
"What did you take?" she asked seriously making me laugh.
"Nothing, I swear."
"Show me your hands!"
"Seriously, little bit."
I could hear Alice laughing. Yeah, laugh away.
"Hands, Daddy!"
I shoved the box in the back of my pants then showed her my hands. Her little eyes widened then she crawled behind me to look around. She was just too funny.
"I'll let you go. I hear you're busy," Alice said.
"Yeah, bye, sis," I said distracted.
Once the phone was next to me, Abby continued to look behind me still unsure what I'd done with the box.
"Whew is it!"
I laughed and shook my head. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
"You took sumfing!"
"Still no idea."
"Dadddddy!" she wailed.
I grinned at her.
"You hidin' it!"
"What am I hiding? I don't have anything? See?" I showed her my hands again.
"It's sumwhew here!" she insisted and pushed me away. It was too funny.
I moved away from the bed allowing Abby to search for the box that was safely tucked in my boxers.
"You took sumfing!"
After searching fruitlessly for a few minutes, she huffed and started glaring at me.
"You don't even know what you lost," I teased her.
"It was a bwu box!"
Holy shit. She really saw it. I tried not to show it on my face. "I didn't have a blue box in there." I pointed to the drawer.
"Daddy! Gimme bwu box!"
"What are you doing here anyway?" I asked, hoping to distract her.
"Helping Mommy," she said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"You're definitely not helping, little bit."
"No, no! Mommy said she haf to clean it. She lost sumfing."
I gave her a dubious look which she returned with a very serious one. Okay, we were cleaning.
"Now we can put everything back," I told her softly.
"No, Mommy haf to see what she lost."
"Abby, I bet mommy found what she lost before she left."
"No, she said it was mishing!" she insisted.
I sighed and sat back on the bed. "What did she lose? Maybe we can find it and surprise her?" I offered.
"Wew… I dunno." She shrugged her little shoulders making me burst in laugh.
"Okay, how about we do something else until mommy returns?"
"Like wut?"
"Hmmm…" I eyed her for a minute then grinned and pressed my fingers to her hand before running away.
She squealed loudly and took off after me.
Shit. I thought as I ran. I had no idea where to hide from her. She always got to me because she was small and quick. It was a horrible idea to play tag.
Before I knew what happened, I felt a tap on my thigh then she was gone. Fuck. I took off after her. I wasn't going to lose again.
An hour later, I had her trapped in our bathroom. We were both sweating and breathing hard. With all the running, the box managed to fall at some point because I couldn't feel it pressed against my back. But I couldn't think of that now. I had to give her the tag and it was so fucking difficult, even though I had her cornered.
Abby made to duck between my legs and that's when I caught her raising her up. "Got ya!"
Just then the doorbell rang and I hoped it wasn't Bella. We had left a messy trail in our wake. Abby was down to her underwear and my shirt was somewhere on the floor, along with different items we might have knocked out.
Cody started barking as the person at the door kept ringing.
"You have it. Just hold on," I told Abby before going to the front door. "Fuck, Cody! What have you done?" I shouted when I saw a roll of toilet paper around his head and everywhere else he had been. "You're not one year old anymore."
He only barked some more and wiggled his tail at me. I dodged the mess of toilet paper and opened the front door. My eyes widened when I saw Bella.
"Hi," I greeted her, leaning against the door.
"Am I not allowed in the war zone?" she joked knowing well what was inside. There was always a mess when I was left alone with Abby.
"I swear, Cody is on his own. I was playing with Abby," I warned her. Cody growled from behind me for ditching him.
Bella pushed me away looking around cautiously then she gasped, grabbing my arm.
"Edward!"
"Uh, yeah. That's totally Cody's fault," I told her quickly. He barked at me. "What? I didn't tell you to unroll that thing," I defended myself. He continued to bark.
Bella bent to untangle Cody from the mess he had gotten into when Abby came running to us.
"I found the bwu box!"
"Fuck." I grasped my hair. What have I done wrong? Seriously.
"Mommy! You'we back! I cleaned for you!"
She was distracted. Good. If I was quick, I could steal the box again before she opened it.
"You cleaned?" Bella asked incredulously. "You turned the house upside down in a few hours. It's your special skill. You two should never be left home alone ever again," she demanded glaring at me.
"No, Mommy!" Abby tugged at her hand. "We cwened your dawer!"
"Really?" Bella glanced at me and I shrugged.
We followed Abby back to our room.
"Why is she wearing only her underwear? I bet she's dripping wet," Bella whispered.
"We played tag, you know?" I whispered back.
"And destroyed the house in the process."
"Well…" I shot her a grin.
"See?" Abby said loudly getting our attention.
I was sure Bella's eyes would fall out of the sockets as she took in the bedroom. Not only the bed was full of whatever had been in our drawers, but the game had gotten a little out of hand and Abby ended up in our closet. Some clothes were on the floor.
"What did you lose?" I asked Bella, hoping to steer her attention off the box that was in Abby's hand.
Shit. How do I get it?
"My red nail polish. Apparently, she found it," Bella said slowly eyeing the room. "What are you holding there, sweetie?" she finally asked, returning her eyes to Abby.
"Nothing! It's just som-" I rushed out only to be cut off.
"Balloons! I found them in Daddy's dawer!" Abby quipped up.
I wondered if I could just disappear. I shot Bella a panicked look because she realized what was there.
"Wait!" I shouted. She said balloons…not that it was hard to mistake them, but that meant… "You opened the box?" My mouth was dry.
"Yep." She beamed at me. "Will you fill it?"
"I…"
To my utter horror and surprise, Bella started laughing so hard there were tears on her cheeks.
Short, random outtakes are always floating around in my head...this one came so sudden...I could see Abby finding condoms in Edward's drawer and decided to have a little fun with that.
Review and I hope you had fun.