This chapter is dedicated to the usual, Yani, who has the amazing story Maurader meets girl, which is fabulous! Like this and you'll love that Sirius and OC fic! And to the people who have put this story on alert or favorite but haven't reviewed! I adore you too! Please review! :) they make me write faster! Lol.
The next weekend came quickly. It was incredibly difficult to keep my distance from James for a week. Every time he was near me, he tried to pull me in for an overly passionate kiss and I would have to push him away. Lily had reassured him that we weren't on the verge of breaking up. It made me hurt that he would think I would ever be the one to leave him.
Alice had promised me that the dorm would be empty the day of the hogsmeade visit. The girls were all going shopping. I sat in the common room with James, in my pajamas, until it seemed that every single person from third year up was out of the dorm. I grabbed James hand and started to pull him up the stairs. He gave me an odd look but I continued to drag him along.
Once we reached the door I pulled him inside and cast a stronger silent locking charm on the door. I moved toward him and kissed him briefly. He responded with vigor. I began to move us back toward my bed. With each step the butterflies in my stomach fluttered harder. He sat down on the bed and I pushed him back, much like the last time we were in here. Except, it was a lot more forceful. I straddled his lap like I always did, our lips never leaving each others. This time, I decided to take the first step.
I reached down with criss-crossed arms and sat up. I pulled my shirt over my head and threw it off to the side. James eyes bulged out of his skull for a second. He opened his mouth to say something but was distracted by me tugging on the edge of his shirt. I pulled it off before he could stop me. His hands caught mine.
"Natalya." he groaned. I knew this was coming. I was prepared for it. I moved his hands up and placed them over my bra. His eyes went wide. I leaned in to him, kissing him tenderly.
"Please." I just barely whispered. He groaned again. I kissed him more forcefully this time and to my surprise his hands twitched. I let out a small gasp. I moved my hand off of his and ran them down his chest. They rested right at the waistband on his pants. I began to slip off his belt and he moaned against my mouth.
"We can't." his strangled voice answered. This was the answer I always got. Except usually he only had his shirt off. I shook my head and continued to work on getting his belt off. He didn't stop me. He wanted this as much as I did. After getting his belt off I unclasped the back of my bra. He stared at me for a long moment. "Are you sure?" he asked in the same strangled whisper. I nodded.
His hands slid down to my cotton shorts. I gasped as his cold hands (how was he cold if we were in May?) slid just slightly underneath it. He made as if to back away but I took his hands and placed them back where they had just been. I undid the button to his pants and then the zipper. I tugged them down to his knees and he kicked them off the rest of the way. I looked at him suspiciously for a moment.
"Jamie, how many girls have you slept with?" I inquired. He looked a bit shocked at my question.
"One." he replied. I nodded. He most definitely knew what he was doing. If he had already done it before, why was he so hesitant to do that with me? I didn't get the chance to ask. His hands slid in to the cotton shorts and pulled them off with a swift tug. I felt almost completely exposed.
Yet, somehow, he made it feel alright. I kissed him savagely as I ground my hips in to his. I felt him through his boxers. I smirked and began to pull those down as well. He kicked those off and I gulped. This was it. The butterflies all disappeared. His fingers hooked in to the sides of my lace knickers and slid them down slowly. I was making it difficult as I continued to grind against him. He flipped us over and stared down at me.
"I don't want to hurt you. Please Natalya. I can't." he sighed in to my hair. Shivers went down my spine. We were so close. He couldn't back out now!
"I'll be fine. I took the anti-conception potion. I'm prepared for any bit of pain. Please Jamie. I need this. I need you." I replied and ran my hands down the planes of his chest. He moaned as my hands traveled a little lower. "Please Jamie." I whimpered. His resolve collapsed.
He was right. It hurt. It hurt a lot. But after a few seconds on intense pain, I was on cloud nine. I was overcome with sheer bliss. He kissed up and down my neck as he picked up a steady rhythm. I moaned in to his mouth when his lips came back to mine. It was simple. Easy, loving James. He made it so easy to be in love with him.
After we were finished, I laid my head on his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around me. I sighed. His kissed the top of my head. I was totally and completely content. Nothing could ruin this for me. Ever.
"I love you. So much." he whispered in to my hair.
"I love you more." I joked. He chuckled.
"I doubt that's possible." he said seriously. I looked up at him and raised my eyebrow.
"I've fancied on you since you kissed me in December. I've had more time to contemplate my feelings and love you more." I argued. He shift us so that we were facing each other. An inch of space between us.
"Natalya," he said my name as if it were a rare flower, "I have fancied you since I met you on the train in first year. Why do you think I became friends with you?" he kissed my cheek.
"But, if you fancied me then why did you go out with all those girls?" I asked. He pushed a lock of hair behind my ear.
"We just grew really close and I never thought you would think of me that way. Besides, I was going to ask you to ball in fourth year but you had already been asked by Garett." James replied. I ran my fingers along his jaw.
"We went as friends Jamie. I wanted to go with you but you had asked Mia." I stated. He raised an eyebrow.
"Mia asked me. She said it would make any girl there jealous. I was trying to make you jealous." He said, putting special emphasis on the word you. My mouth was agape. He had been trying to make me jealous? My heart twitched. He was so, sweet. An arse, but sweet.
"James," I started. I needed to know the answer. I wanted a peace of mind.
"What's the matter? Natie, tell me." he whispered. I gulped audibly.
"Who was it?" I questioned, I buried my face against his hot chest. He placed a hand under my chin and pulled my face up so I was looking at him.
"Who was what?" he asked me, a look of concern on his features. I tried to tug my face away but he held my gaze firmly.
"Who...who did you...who did you sleep with?" I asked, I felt tears sting in my eyes. I was being an idiot. I knew that. But I had to know. He was my first. Why hadn't I been his? Who was it before me? He sighed and kissed my lips gently.
"You're going to hate me." he muttered. I shook my head. I could never hate him. He sighed once more. "It was Lindsey." he said quietly. I felt myself choke up and the tears well in my eyes.
"Oh, alright." I sniffled and moved back a little bit. He groaned and snaked his arms around my waist.
"Please don't be like that. I was just being a normal hormonal teenage boy. That's why I didn't want to rush in to this with you. Please don't cry." he muttered and brushed the tears I had just shed away with his thumb. I felt like such an idiot. I was crying for no reason.
"It's fine. Jamie," I took his hand off of my waist, "I'm fine. Really." I stated and sniffled a little. I got out of bed and put all of my clothes on, not even looking at him. I finished pulling my shirt over my head and saw that he was just laying there. Staring at me. "What?" I snapped. He got out of bed and pulled his clothes on as well. He never answered me. As soon as he was dressed he came over and sat on the edge of my bed.
"Please Natalya. Don't do this." he whispered and grabbed my hands, pulling me closer.
"Do what?" I sniffed, looking away. He rolled his eyes and pulled me down to the bed next to him.
"Talk to me. Don't bottle this up. We just had this amazing time," my cheeks got a tinge of pink, "and you're closing yourself off. Please, talk to me." he put his hand on my waist. I sighed.
"It's just, well, she's such a little prat. I know you weren't with me then but it still hurts. It was my first. But it wasn't yours. I feel hurt Jamie." I said in a low voice. He pulled me on to his lap and then placed me between his legs. My back against his chest. I put my head back on his left shoulder and looked up at him.
"I swear, I never even thought I would be with you Nat. I thought we were only friends. I thought I was in love with the girl. Do you know why I finally gave in to you? Not because you were starving me of your attention," he gave me a pointed look and I looked down, "but because I know in my heart that this is love. I thought it was love with Lindsey. But as soon as she got what she wanted, it went down hill. I KNOW this is love." he kissed my cheek.
"I'm sorry." I said.
"It's not your fault Nat. But I do love you. I know that for a fact. Please don't close yourself off." he kissed my neck. I sighed.
"I swear I won't. Ever again." I promised, winding my hands in to his hair.
XxXxXxXxXxXxXx
I bit my lip and looked up at him through my lashes. We had just gotten off the train and walked through the barrier. Harry and Ginny were waiting off to the side, talking to Margo, who had come to get me. I turned to see Lily kissing Scorpious goodbye. He kissed her forehead and left to find his family. Albus said something to Margo and she flashed her ring with a smile. Who in their right mind would marry my spoiled sister?
I looked back at James. He smiled sadly down at me. I didn't want to be away from him for two whole months. Well, part of June and all of July. I just didn't know how I would survive. He kissed me gently but I wanted so much more. Sure, I would see him often. I was spending the whole month of August with his family. Under the condition that I stayed in Lily's room. Ginny's exact words were 'I love you dearie. But I was a teenager once too'. I could respect that. It didn't mean James couldn't just walk across that hall.
His arms wrapped around my torso, crushing me to him. I rested my head on his shoulder.
"I'm going to miss you." I said sadly. He smiled and added a bit more pressure to his hug.
"I'll see you soon enough. Your birthday is in two weeks. Then you'll be of age along with me. We can apparate to see each other whenever. I promise, time will go by faster than you think." he kissed my forehead. I sniffled and pulled back.
"I love you." I whispered. He smiled widely and and kissed me full on the lips. It felt me slightly dazed as he pulled back. I would never get used to that initial spark.
"I love you too, angel." he said and gave me a quick kiss again. Angel? That was new! I liked it. I was anything but, but if he wanted to call me that, I wasn't objecting. Margo popped up behind him and nearly scared the life out of me.
"Natie! I missed you sissy!" she yelled and pulled me out of James' arms. I glared at the side of her head for a moment. Then finally hugged her back. I didn't hate my sister. Not really. She just always got what she wanted because my mother seemed to still think of her as an only child. "Can you believe I'm getting married in two days?" she shrieked happily.
"No." I muttered. She gave me an odd look. I quickly recovered with "It's all just flown by, hasn't it?" She smiled, content with my answer. James waved goodbye. I repeated his action pathetically as Margo continued to talk my ear off about her wedding plans. God, these next two days would be torture.
A/N: Alright, a bit short but totally worth it, right? Lol. Please please please review! They make me super happy!