A/N: It's decision time, folks. This is the last chapter that my sister has beta read for me so far. So do I a)continue publishing a chapter a week, only this time the unedited versions, possibly (probably) of lower quality, or b)wait for my sister to catch up on editing and post as I get them, with better quality but an unknown timetable? I leave it to you, the readers.

Chapter 5
Study Sessions

Buffy: "Spells can be dangerous. It doesn't mean he thinks you're a bad witch."
Willow: "I am a bad witch!" -' Something Blue'

After two nights of useless searching for the vampire, Giles had given up on trying to keep Spike chained down anywhere, and had finally given him his freedom.

"If you choose to forgo the protection that you asked us for by going out every night and running the risk of being recaptured, then I'm not going to waste Buffy's time and energy trying to find you," he'd lectured, aggravated, "Besides, I want my bathroom back."

"'Risk of being recaptured'?" Spike had scoffed, "Right, like a bunch of gits dressed in fatigues and night goggles are going to zap me in the middle of the Bronze and drag me out. That'd make a bit of a stir, I'd reckon. Wouldn't be much of a secret then."

"So you're just assuming these soldiers don't have regular lives? That they never have time to change their clothes and go out like normal people?" Spike hadn't liked the way the Watcher had looked at him. He much preferred for things to be the other way around.

"All one of them has to do is spot you and make a phone call," Giles had pointed out, "Then the minute you are somewhere out of the way, they most certainly will recapture you. I highly doubt they'd make the same mistake twice and allow you to escape again."

If there had been any color in Spike's face, it would have drained away at that. He'd never really thought it through, the real risks of being spotted. Even Willow's dorm room could be dangerous. Hadn't they cornered him there once already? They could easily do it again, and the Slayer might not be there to distract them next time. He'd just have to spend a lot more time at the flat, as much as he'd hate it.

He hadn't been idle, though. Every chance he got, he spent scouring the Watcher's collection, looking for the spell Red had mentioned, or some clue to what had been done to him, and how to reverse it. He hadn't seen the witch much the past few days. He hoped she didn't think he was ignoring her, especially after the way things had ended the last time. But his only chances had been a couple of quick smiles when no one was looking, the one time she'd been over. It seemed she was still a bit mad at Giles. He would have liked to get her alone for a moment, if only to ask more about what he was looking for, but it had been impossible.

Spike wandered around the kitchen, looking for something to munch on. He'd been working busily for some time, and he needed a break. He glanced up at the loft, making sure he hadn't woken Giles with his foray into the kitchen. Night was really the only time he could do his research now, after he'd been caught when the other man had returned from an appointment earlier than expected.

"And just what do you think you're doing?" the librarian had accused when he'd walked in and spotted the stacks of books that had been piled around Spike.

"Fine, thanks, and how are you?" Spike had said mockingly. "Just a bit of light reading," he'd continued.

"Light reading?" Giles had scoffed, "You're trying to find that spell of yours."

"What if I am?" There had been no point in trying to pretend otherwise, really. "You lot can't seem to be bothered to look into it, so I figured I'd do the research for you." He'd gone back to his book, considering the conversation ended. It hadn't been.

"I won't have you using my own books to free yourself from this!"

"Whose books should I use, then? I doubt the Public Library has anything on this, even if they were open at night." Spike hadn't even bothered to look up, intent on the page before him.

Giles had walked up behind him, to see what the vampire was reading. He'd sighed in disgust. "You can't even read that one, Spike. It's in Latin."

"Oh, is that why it looks all funny?" Spike had shot a withering glance at the Watcher. "My Latin may be rustier than yours, Rupert, but I still remember enough to get the gist of it." He'd turned back to the book once more.

"You speak Latin?" There had been genuine surprise in the other man's voice. It had irritated Spike for some reason.

"As a matter of fact, I do," he'd shot back, "Latin, Greek, a smattering of French even, and quite a few demon tongues as well. Probably more than you do. Despite what you may think, I'm not a complete idiot."

But now the Watcher wouldn't let Spike near any of his books, as impossible as that might seem, considering the amount of them scattered across the flat. So the vampire was forced to do his research at night, after Giles had retired for the evening. Not that this was a real problem for him. It was the research itself that was frustrating. Some nights he'd ended up sneaking out to go find a thing or two to smash.

Tonight, though, he'd finally turned up something. He'd been puzzling his way through some text written in archaic French, and about to give up on the stupid thing, when he spotted something. He wasn't entirely sure, but he thought the section had something to do with seeing spells. Even better, he'd found a name too – Cloutier. Now he just had to find an English text that mentioned this bloke and find out if this was the spell he'd been searching for.

Snack in hand, Spike headed back to the little library behind the kitchen, hoping it wouldn't take too long to finally find what he needed.

Spike eased himself along the dorm hallway cautiously, with an eye out for possible hiding spots. He'd been dashing from shadow to shadow all the way from the flat. No point in taking too many chances, not when he'd finally found what he needed. An overheard comment had told him that Buffy would be out with some new fellow tonight, giving him an opportunity to have some time with Willow.

He knocked on the door, hoping for a reply. He was suddenly worried that the girl had gone off somewhere else, to study or something. He hadn't thought of that. But she responded promptly.

"Co…I mean, who is it?"

He smiled at that, and waltzed in the door. "About time, love. Someone dangerous could come in."

"Luckily for me, you're not." She barely glanced up from her laptop as she asked with a tone of impatience, "What do you want now, Spike?"

"Are you mad at me, pet?" he asked worriedly. He needed this spell done, he couldn't afford to have her angry with him, "Or is this just a bad time?"

She sighed. "Sorry, and yes, it is a bad time. I've got three major research papers due in the next few weeks, plus I've got to start studying for my final exams soon. I'm kind of swamped right now."

"I'd wondered why you hadn't been over lately. I would have come here, but it's just too dangerous to do it often." He didn't want to sound like a coward, but if she thought he'd been ignoring her, it could be bad. "Plus, if they keep catching me in the same dorm room, they're bound to get suspicious of you."

"It's okay, I'd figured all that out already." She smiled at him briefly before turning back to her work. "But I really can't hang out with you tonight, I'm sorry."

He grimaced and set his bag of ingredients down. Obviously, he'd have to play it differently if he wanted his spell done tonight.

"What are you working on now?" he asked, coming around behind her chair to look over her shoulder.

She twisted around a bit to look at him, curious. "Why?"

He shrugged, "It might be something I could help you with, get it done a bit faster. Then you could take a little break, maybe." He began massaging her shoulders and neck, and she relaxed back against him, unconsciously.

"I doubt it, " she said with an amused smile, "It's for my Ethno-Musicology class."

"Well, no, I can't help much with that one," he conceded, "What about that break, though?" he coaxed, "Your shoulders are like rocks. How long have you been working on this?"

She glanced at the clock, then stared. "Wow, three hours at least. I hadn't realized I'd been working so hard. Maybe you're right."

"Of course I'm right," he said matter-of-factly, as she saved the file and shut her laptop.

"Would this break include a massage?" she asked hopefully.

"Naturally." If anything would get her in a better mood for spell-casting, that would.

She laid down on the bed, with her feet towards the pillows. He debated for a bit on where to put himself, then decided on sitting next to her as the wisest choice.

"You know, it works better if you take your shirt off."

"Not a chance, Spike."

He shrugged to himself. It had been worth a shot, at least. He started kneading her shoulders again, trying to work some of the knots out.

"Mmmm," she sighed, "That feels so nice."

He worked on her back for quite a while, even managing to slide his hands up under her shirt eventually. She'd shivered a bit at first from his cold hands, but let him do it. He thought that was a very encouraging sign. She was limp as a rag doll now, the knots gone, but he kept up the massage. Things could get very interesting tonight, spell or no spell, he mused.

Then he saw she was frowning at something by her desk. The bag he'd brought.

"Uh, Spike, why exactly did you come over here?" She squirmed around to look at him, and he quickly withdrew his hands. She sounded too cautious for him to take any risks.

"I haven't seen you in days, thought I'd drop by and…" He stopped. Her skeptical look told him she wasn't buying it.

"That's not ice cream this time, is it? That bag's from the Magic Box."

"Well, okay, yes, part of the dropping by did include me hoping you might have time to try that trance thingy you mentioned. It would just be a little look at this spell on me, nothing else," he hastened to reassure her, "And you'd get a break from having to look at whatever that stuff is for a while." He gestured towards the laptop.

She smiled at that, but then her face fell. "Giles is right, Spike, I'm no good as a witch."

"Don't recall him saying that at all," Spike insisted, "If I remember correctly, he just said you were having trouble focusing right now, with the breakup and what-all. Well, here's your chance to prove him wrong."

She shook her head. "I've tried a few spells since then, small stuff, trying to do just that. They went all screwy on me, when they did anything." Her tone was a little sulky, as if hating to admit that the Watcher had been right.

He was disappointed at the news, then wondered if maybe he could talk her into trying it anyway. He decided to see how angry she still was at Giles. That might do the trick.

"So, I guess that means all regularly scheduled magic lessons are postponed until the Watcher decides you're stable enough again?" he said casually.

"Giles doesn't run my life!" Willow shot back, defiant, before considering exactly what he'd said. "What 'regularly scheduled lessons'?"

"Figured Giles must be the one teaching you all this mojo stuff. He knows enough about it," he shrugged in feigned indifference, getting up and rooting around in the girls' fridge.

"No, I mostly just figure things out for myself. He just tells me it's dangerous and I shouldn't do it. He says that about a lot of the things we do with Buffy," she added, her brow furrowing in thought.

Spike finally came up with an apple, and bit into it, heading back over to sit on Willow's bed. She sat up next to him.

"He says not to do it? I thought he wanted you to do that truth spell on me," he faked confusion.

"Well, if we need magic to help us, then I do the spell," she explained.

"Ah, so it's okay for you to do magic when it's convenient for him, then. The rest of the time, forget about it."

"Yeah. No! I do spells other times, just Giles doesn't approve of it really," she sighed, "I guess he does think I'm a bad witch."

"That's one way of looking at it."

"What's another way?"

Spike ignored the query for now. "So aside from the Watcher-sanctioned spells, what else do you do?"

"This and that," she shrugged, "Whatever seems like an interesting spell."

He cocked an eyebrow at that, "Sounds fairly hodge-podge to me. No wonder your spells go all wonky half the time."

"Why's that?" She seemed genuinely confused.

He couldn't believe she was serious. One or both of them was missing something. Bollocks. He'd have to actually take an interest in how she got here, walk her through this somehow if he wanted his spell done properly. He sighed.

"Well, how did you get into magic in the first place? What was your first spell?" he asked.

She thought about it. "Well, I first got interested in it when I was going through Miss Calendar's files. I started reading up on it, going to websites. But I guess my first real casting was when I re-ensouled Angel."

Spike nearly choked on his apple. "That was you? And it was your first spell!"

"Yes."

Spike quickly revised his opinions of the young red-haired girl sitting next to him. She had incredible magical potential, would have to have, to cast such a powerful spell with no experience.

"That's like learning to run before you can walk, or even crawl. I'm actually surprised you haven't fallen down more!" No wonder she was all confused, no one had ever bothered to train her properly.

"I don't understand."

"That was one powerful spell, love. You've no idea the lengths Darla went to, trying to have it broken or reversed. Never said what she was trying to break, but in retrospect…" Spike shook his head to clear the old memories and focused on the topic at hand, "You've got a lot of power, Red, incredible potential."

"Me? Don't be ridiculous! Half my spells don't even come out right!" She scoffed at the very notion that she might be any good.

"Of course not. Like I said, you got thrown in the bloody deep-end without learning how to swim first. It's just been luck and natural talent that's kept you from drowning," he explained, trying a different analogy.

"So you're saying I'm no good? I'm just going to keep floundering around until I hurt someone?" He couldn't tell if she was irritated at him, or upset at what she thought were her failings.

"If you keep at it this way." He tried to think of a way to explain it to her that she'd understand. "Look, you're good at maths, right? Calculus and what-all?"

"Yes," she replied, bewildered, "I don't see…"

"Well, you didn't start out doing…I don't know…algorithms or some rot, did you? Back in grammar school?"

"No, of course not!"

"You learned your numbers, then your sums, then algebra, and so forth."

"So?" She clearly didn't see where he was going with this.

"So, why should magic be any different? You need to learn those basic building blocks first – learn to count, as it were – before you touch even simple spells."

"You mean, I have to start all over?" she was shocked and dismayed at the notion.

He thought of something sarcastic to say to that, but held back. He needed her to do this, even if it meant having to wait longer.

"You've got to have a good foundation before you can build anything, kitten. Imagine not having to worry anymore if a spell's going to work or not – being able to help even more than you do now. Think of how powerful you could be if you just had the right tools to get the job done." He threw every ounce of sincerity he could into his tone, willing her to believe.

It worked. A light sparked and kindled in her green eyes, growing brighter with enthusiasm. "I don't know why I didn't think of that myself! That's a wonderful idea, Spike!"

"Just telling you what the librarian should have said. Regular practice, that's the key."

"I see that now. I can design my own 'curriculum of magic,' just like my major! It'll take some research, but the semester's more than half over, and I'll have plenty of time over the holidays…And Giles can't possibly object, when I won't even be doing spells at first."

"Oh, yes, by all means, let's get him to sign off on this." Spike couldn't keep the heavy sarcasm out of his voice.

"What?"

"Who cares what he bloody well thinks of it? He's been holding you back, love. Instead of teaching you, or even encouraging you to study on your own, he's been undermining your confidence in yourself. Except when he needs something from you. Probably doesn't want you overshadowing him…or his Slayer."

"It's not like that, Spike! Giles just worries, that's all. And there's no way I could ever overshadow Buffy," she laughed at the thought. "I'm just plain Willow."

"What is that, your catch-phrase?" he scoffed, "You cast a powerful and difficult spell on one of the worst vampires in history, with no experience. I'm sure you've cast other spells just as amazing at other times. With a little practice, you could very well be more powerful than the Slayer's ever dreamed of being."

Willow shook her head in bemusement. "I'm hardly that good, Spike," she said in that self-deprecating voice he was learning so well, "And you're wrong about Giles. He's not like that."

"Willow, I told you, I don't like the idea of you doing spells right now." Giles was standing in his study, arguing with Willow. After Spike had left her dorm, she'd come over to the Watcher's apartment to borrow some books, eager to get started on her research. So eager, in fact, that she'd apparently beaten Spike there. Not that she could mention that to Giles.

Willow rolled her eyes. "Not spells, Giles, more basic stuff – magic theory, grounding, elemental work, concentration drills…" She answered in an absent-minded fashion, too busy hunting among the shelves to really pay attention to his protest.

"Concentration – Willow, you're not still planning on trying that trance, are you?"

Something in Giles' tone rubbed her the wrong way, and instead of reassuring him, her temper flared. "What if I am? It's not like something bad could happen if I mess up, I just won't achieve a trance state."

"Willow, until we know more about…"

She whirled to face him, angry that he was being so stubborn. "We won't know more unless we do something like this!"

"I'm just saying…"

"Why are you being like this, Giles? Why do you always try to hold me back?"

"I'm not…"

"You are! It's always 'Oh, it's too dangerous' – until you need a spell done, then it's all 'Willow, do the spell'."

"That's not true! I'm only concerned…"

"So concerned that you leave me half-trained all the time? So I'm always messing up because I don't know enough about what I'm doing? No more, Giles. See these books?" She offered the selection she was holding, "They're the start of my new magic training. I'm going to practice every day. And you…" as Giles opened his mouth to protest again, "are not going to stop me!"

"I have no objections to you wanting to give yourself a firmer education in the basics of magics, I just think you should wait a little while longer before beginning."

He has no objections? Like I need his permission? Spike was right! Wait, Spike was right? As much as she'd started to rely on Spike's sympathy, she still didn't trust him entirely, especially about appraising her friends. Willow had assumed he was just, well, being Spike when he'd bad-mouthed Giles. She hadn't wanted to believe it, not about someone she looked up to so much.

"No. No more waiting, Giles. I'm tired of waiting. When we need a spell, we usually need it right then. The sooner I start, the sooner I'll be ready." There, he couldn't fault the logic of that argument.

"At least allow me to supervise…"

"Supervise? You think I need a babysitter? What, I'm so incompetent I can't even do concentration drills on my own?" She knew her anger was quickly growing out of proportion, but she didn't care. Right now it seemed that everything Spike had said was true – Giles was trying to hold her back. "You're afraid, that's all. Afraid of how powerful I could be, how powerful I'm going to be!"

"Let's be reasonable about this…"

"I am being reasonable, Giles. But you're just trying to get in my way!"

The sound of another argument interrupted theirs. "Giles, I accidentally killed Spike! That's okay, right?" Buffy called out in a patently false tone.

Giles blinked in confusion. "Perhaps we'd better go see what's going on," he said, heading towards the living room. Willow rolled her eyes again, but followed along behind him, still fuming.

Buffy was standing in the living room, face flushed with triumph, while a rather sulky Spike sat on Giles' chair, tied up. "I finally caught him! You know where he was? On campus, of all places. Trying to get back in to this secret lab."

"Buffy, what are you doing?" Giles was baffled.

She was taken aback at that, "I caught Spike, like we've been trying to do."

"I'm afraid we've given up on that. In fact, this is the first night he's left the flat in days. I was actually pleased to see him go," the Watcher explained, "If you'd bothered to drop by at all this week, you would have known that." There was a touch of exasperation in his voice.

"Told you so, Slayer. Or maybe you just like having your men all tied up," Spike stuck his tongue up against his teeth, leering at her.

"You're a pig, Spike," was the prompt reply.

"You know, you really need to come up with a new come-back, pet. That one's getting a bit stale. Or is that just too hard on your brain?"

Willow had been watching from the shadows behind Giles, but now she moved into view, hoping to distract her roommate from punching Spike, or worse.

"Will, what are you doing here?" Buffy asked, surprised.

"Oh, just thought I'd borrow some books from Giles," Willow tried hard to keep her tone casual. Surely Buffy would be on her side about this.

"Not spell books?" Buffy eyed the tomes warily. Willow closed her eyes and tried taking deep breaths. It wasn't helping her temper any.

"Buffy, could I have a word with you in private?" Giles interrupted before Willow could lash out at her friend, "Willow, you might as well untie Spike, in the meantime."

Willow sighed, then shrugged her agreement as Giles drew Buffy down the hall towards his study, leaving her alone with the vampire.

As she untied him, she asked, "Were you really trying to get back down there?"

He shrugged, looking a bit embarrassed, "Not sure what I'd do if I ever did get down there. I can't make them undo whatever they did. Maybe I could find some files, though, something." He sighed, "I can't just hide here doing nothing, Red. It's not my style."

She squeezed his shoulder a little in sympathy. She didn't exactly want the vampire to be able to kill again, but she could understand the frustration of being thwarted like that.

"You were right about Giles," she finally admitted.

"I'm sorry, pet."

"No, you're not, you love anything that goes wrong with the Scoobies." He might have been right, but he was still Spike, after all.

"Well, true, you've got me there." His candid grin brought a faint smile to her lips. Then his face grew serious, the flippant tone gone from his voice. "But I'm sorry that you're upset. It's never nice to realize you've been betrayed by the ones you love." She knew he spoke with the bitterness of long experience.

"Giles didn't…" She stopped as part of the other conversation drifted down the hall.

"…have been trying to discourage her…" That was Giles, apparently explaining the earlier conversation to Buffy.

"Well, discourage harder! You know what happens when she messes with magic when she's upset!" Willow was shocked. Buffy always seemed so supportive of her magic.

"You're her roommate, surely you…"

Willow's jaw firmed in stubborn anger. She would not be swayed from this. She wasn't just some emotional screw-up messing with things she didn't understand. "I can't believe them!"

Spike was watching her with that intense, disconcerting gaze of his. She shifted uncomfortably, not certain she wanted to know what he was thinking, when he surprised her.

"What are you doing on Friday, pet?"

"I told you, I've got to study," she said, a bit regretfully.

"All weekend?" He gave her an inviting look, "You'll need a break or two. Thought maybe we could meet up at that coffee place near your dorm."

"The Grotto?" she said, a little surprised. She doubted Spike had ever been in a real coffee house before. The Bronze didn't count.

"It'd be a nice study break, don't you think? We could meet up around nine, just for an hour or so. I'm buying," he coaxed, cocking his head and giving her his most adorable smile.

Willow sternly ignored the sudden butterflies in her stomach and opened her mouth to say no, when another shred of conversation drifted her way. ("…just have to humor her for now…") Humor me? Humor me!

"Absolutely," she declared rashly, "I'll be there."

Spike's smile was so infectious, she couldn't help but smile back.