This is long. Sorry about the delay… had to finish it and work was just so darn busy today. I won't be updating Thursday, just so I can get the next one written. So enjoy the long chapter!

Oh… yeah… Dr. Creepy warning… NO FCs were harmed in the making of this chapter, but I killed a bunch of M & M's….

What Goes Around Comes Around- Justin Timberlake

~~oo~~

Chapter 37: "You have two options."

EPOV

I can't say what it was about Bella that put me at ease.

Having her beside me as we sat and talked changed the atmosphere in my home like a light bulb being turned on. There was still the presence of the shadows around the edges, the fear of what would happen when Carlisle returned home, or the idea that when she went home, her light would go with her.

I wanted to bottle some and carry it with me, like a lantern to light my way.

So as I watched the clock, I felt the slow leeching of her light with each tick of the minute hand.

I didn't want her to be here when he got home. After the night before, it would only make things worse. Each time Esme peeked in to check on us, I tensed with the idea that she was coming to warn us.

Carlisle will be home soon.

Prepare.

Bella needs to leave.

Say goodbye.

"Edward?"

I looked up to see Bella watching me worriedly. I tried to smile, but I caught the movement by the door, seeing Esme there lingering.

"Are you all right? I'll stay if you want me to," Bella was saying.

Wait, she was really leaving?

I couldn't handle that.

I was just imagining, right?

"Esme, maybe I should stay," she said, looking over at my mom who was checking the time as well with a frown on her face.

"I think after everything that has happened, it's not the best idea, Bella, " Esme said.

"He can't bully me," Bella said and instinctively I reached for her hand.

"I don't want you to go," I whispered, and then swallowed. "But I don't want him to verbally attack you either."

Bella turned to me and scowled, her hand tightening around mine.

"He already tried. He doesn't scare me," she insisted.

"What do you mean he tried?" I asked, feeling the panic rise.

She leaned in and kissed me softly beside my lips, her fingertips brushing over my ear and down my neck, instantly offering a bit of calm.

"I didn't want you to be upset, Edward. It's nothing, okay?"

I pulled away from the serenity of her touch to look down at her, wanting an answer. She sighed and pulled away, frowning.

I didn't like to see her frown. Probably as much as she didn't like to see me upset.

"He came by the house this morning, to tell my dad that I shouldn't be allowed to see you," she said carefully, squeezing my hand a little harder, as if to control my reaction.

It was a little difficult to manage, even with her touch.

"He came over to your house?" I choked, anger and humilation roiling through me in waves.

"Please, Edward," she whispered, leaning in again to take my head in her hands. "He doesn't understand how tough the Swans are. We don't lie down just because someone tells us to."

"Does your dad know about me?" I asked, a new sort of panic rushing through me that the Chief of Police would want his daughter to be as far from the likes of me no matter what.

She shook her head.

"Charlie only knows that I trust you. He'll look out for you, if need be. That's the kind of man he is, Edward," she said.

It was so strange to see that much love and fierce devotion come from someone. Bella seemed to have it in abundance for anyone she cared for. It made my heart swell that she included me in her devotion.

She barely knew me, and yet she wanted to see me safe and happy.

"Bella, Edward. We really need to talk some things over tonight. It's best Bella went home," Esme said from the door. I could hear the pain in her voice.

Esme was just as nervous for Carlisle to come home.

Would it be wrong to just leave?

Leave and not come back?

Why did he have to make it so difficult, when I had found a little peace with Bella?

"I should go," Bella whispered.

I felt her fingers slipping from my neck, leaving me cold.

She was right, but it still terrified me.

She stood beside me, her fingers slipping over my shoulder as she addressed my mother.

"Thanks for letting me come over," she said simply, but her eyes seemed to be carrying an entire conversation with my mother.

I wondered what they really talked about.

Pies and cookies didn't make my mom look like she was readying for battle.

"You are welcome anytime, Bella. Thank you," Esme replied, the cryptic eye speak lingering until the phone in the kitchen started to ring. Esme glanced quickly towards me, and then the door.

"I'll walk you out," I murmured and walked quietly beside her as we made our way out to her old truck.

It was much darker outside, both physically and emotionally.

"It's going to be okay, Edward," she whispered when I pulled her in for another infusion of her warmth. "Will you call me if you need anything?"

I nodded into her neck, inhaling her scent and hoping it stayed on me after she left.

"I'll pick you up tomorrow?" I asked. I couldn't let her go just yet.

"I can't wait," she replied and slowly pulled away, kissing me softly before sliding into her seat.

I watched as she started the beast up, trying to smile when the truck slowly moved away. I stood there in the dark and watched her make her way down the long driveway, the red of her tail lights the only thing I could see at the road before those too disappeared, leaving me cold as I stood in the dark.

It wasn't until I saw headlights making their way back towards me up the driveway that I moved. I squinted at first, hoping maybe it was Bella, coming back. But it didn't sound like her truck. I took a step back, thinking perhaps it was Carlisle, but quickly I saw that the car was too small for it to be Carlisle's.

And it was yellow.

It pulled up into the space near where Bella had been and I had to wonder who was inside behind the tinted windows.

I didn't know anyone who drove a Porsche.

Carlisle was not a Porsche man, no matter what his ego.

I heard the door behind me open, and glancing back, I saw Esme stepping out and down the steps towards me.

"I thought we could use a hand tonight," she said and smiled as the car door opened.

I was about to ask what she meant when a familiar voice answered.

"You'll need all the help you can get, Esme."

I turned back around in surprise to find Dr. Alice Whitlock gracefully slipping out of the car. But as soon as the car door was closed, she moved quickly over towards us and took Esme's hand, a fierce look on her face.

"This was too long coming, Esme," she said, standing tall, even with her short stature.

Alice seemed to simply command a presence of authority as she stood there staring down my mom.

"I know," Esme agreed and glanced at me. "I need to make this right and get things in order again, for Edward and Emmett."

"What about Emmett and me?" I asked, confused.

Was this an intervention?

I thought Esme wanted Bella here?

Fuck, I had only jacked off twice today!

What the fuck?

Alice took my hand and drew my attention from the debate in my head.

"This isn't about you directly, Edward. I don't want you to think I am here because of you. I'm here because Esme asked me, and because we have to make this a safe place for you to feel comfortable," Alice explained.

I was completely lost now.

"What do you mean? Is this about what happened last night?" I asked, thinking now that maybe this was not so much about my issues, but perhaps about what had happened the night before.

Alice glanced back down the driveway and frowned.

"Let's go inside. I need to get us settled before he comes home," she said and motioned us inside.

"What's going on?" I asked as we stepped into the foyer.

"Yeah, what's going on?" Emmett chimed in from the living room.

"Emmett, turn off the TV and come into the dining room," Esme called. "Family meeting."

Immediately, I was nervous.

My therapist was here, and Esme was calling a family meeting.

The last thing I needed was for Emmett to know everything.

"I can't do this with him here," I said, pulling away from Esme.

She looked at me strangely and then nodded.

"Emmett needs to know about Carlisle and I, we're not going to be talking about you tonight," she said. "At least, not unless you want to talk."

I shook my head and glanced at Alice.

"He doesn't need to say anything," Alice agreed and squeezed my arm. "This isn't about your issues, Edward. This is about making this place a safe home."

Emmett glanced at me, his attitude suddenly very apprehensive as he took in the atmosphere. It was the first time I had ever really seen him behave seriously. I nodded and slipped into my seat, watching with my own sense of dread as everyone else settled around the table, Alice taking the head of the table usually reserved for Carlisle.

She placed her hands on top of the table, clasping them together in a very business like way. She was a different person than I was used to based on my one meeting with her just yesterday. I supposed I didn't really know her, but I felt more at ease with her than I had with even my own family. But now, she was a little intimidating.

Difficult to say about a woman that barely reached my chest.

But as she looked from one to the other of us, you could feel her intensity cut through the air like lightening.

Gone was the thoughtful and open minded demeanor. Now she was in charge.

The idea of that scared me a little.

Especially when she spoke.

"I need to make this clear so that all of you understand," she said, looking at all of us intently. "I am here to provide support to you in case things become heated or uncomfortable."

She turned to me and I felt myself flinch. Her eyes tightened, as if she were hurt by the reaction.

"You don't have to say anything, Edward. You need to hear what is to be said, but don't feel the need to answer any questions brought up, okay?" she asked, offering me a supportive nod and a smile.

I simply nodded, not knowing what else to do.

She turned then to Emmett.

"This may upset you Emmett, but its important that you let Esme and Carlisle have their say before you offer any comments, is that understood?" she asked.

"What is this about?" he asked, agitated.

"Emmett," Esme admonished and put her hand out to take his, comforting him. I felt an urge to reach out to take her other hand, the need to feel something overbearing. But I remained in my chair, hands gripping my thighs tensely.

Alice turned to Esme and stared her down the hardest. The power in her stare made it hard to breathe.

"Esme, remember what I said on the phone. It's one way or the other," she said. "I won't be able to help you if you cave. One or the other."

Esme nodded and was about to say something when we heard the garage door open and Carlisle's car pull in. Immediately the tension in the air intensified. Emmett looked around in bewilderment while Alice and Esme had one of those silent conversations all women seem capable of.

We heard Carlisle come in and call out, his voice clearly agitated.

More than anything now, I wanted to stand and run.

This was going to get ugly.

And still, I felt to blame somehow, regardless of what Esme and Alice said.

This was because of me.

"Whit," Carlisle said as he walked in, looking around at all of us warily. "What is this?"

Alice stood and offered him the chair, the look on her face proof enough that she was in charge. He looked from me to Esme before inclining his head to Alice and sitting in the chair, much as she had, hands clasped tightly before him. She took the seat beside Esme, effectively creating a buffer between the two.

"Is this an intervention?" he mused, his eyes showing the darkness that lingered there some nights after an argument.

Alice glanced towards Esme.

"I have been asked to mediate, Carlisle. I am here for everyone's benefit," Alice replied, the professional voice coming through.

He chuckled and look towards Esme.

"Very well," he said, his voice dangerously soft. "What's on your mind Esme?"

We all turned to watch as Esme sat up a little straighter and fought to speak.

Carlisle smiled and waited patiently. Almost like he was mocking her.

"This isn't working out the way you said it would," she finally said.

"How is that, exactly?" he asked, clearly entertained by her discomfort. It made me want to leap over the table and knock him out.

She glanced at Alice, who inclined her head in silent support.

Esme turned back to Carlisle, chin a little higher.

"This isn't that safe place you and I promised we would create for our boys," she said.

He glanced at me, frowning.

"It wasn't my fault we had to move to Forks."

I opened up my mouth to speak but Alice raised her hand to silence me.

"That's not what she means, Carlisle," she stated, nodding for Esme to continue.

Esme looked briefly at me before continuing.

"When we decided to adopt, we were going to change our lifestyle to protect our boys. They didn't deserve to have that stigma should someone find out," she said.

"Found out what?" Emmett interrupted, completely lost in the conversation. I was too though.

One look from Alice and he closed his mouth, letting Esme continue on.

"We need this house to be a sanctuary and it feels more like a prison because you have made it so," she said.

Carlisle's eyes narrowed.

"Now, now, Esme," he chided. "The whole part of an intervention is not to make the person feel like they are being attacked. You're supposed tell them how much you love them and how you want to see them healed."

"I want to see you healed, Carlisle," she repeated.

Everyone noticed she had omitted the first part.

He sat a little straighter and stared her down.

"So what are your conditions, Esme? What are we trying to solve? Edward's pain and distress at having to live in a home we have provided? Or something else?" he hissed.

I swallowed and opened my mouth again, wanting to intervene to defend Esme.

But the look in Alice's eyes kept me quiet.

"This has to do with my happiness, Carlisle. And my sons safety. You aren't a good role model for them now, not until you get help," Esme said, her voice cracking near the end.

"What sort of counselling?" he asked, incredulous. "I don't have a problem."

"You need to stop projecting your anger on our son, Carlisle," she said, her voice becoming more heated as she spoke. "He has become a victim in the worst way, and I will not have him badgered and abused anymore. I will not let my sons feel unsafe in their own house."

He scoffed and leaned back, pointing at Alice.

"She told you to say that," he said dismissively and turned to me. "This is because of you, you realize. All of this. If you hadn't spent your time thinking about getting in Tanya's pants, we'd still be in Anchorage, blissfully ignorant."

"No, we wouldn't," Esme exclaimed, standing up fast. "If you hadn't been screwing Tanya, if you hadn't gone back on your promise about your sexual needs, and if you hadn't debased Edward to the point of making him think he was a deviant, then we'd be having dinner right now instead of this argument!"

Emmett and I both sat there stunned.

Carlisle and Tanya?

Tanya had done those things to Tanya?

"You screwed…Tanya?" Emmett asked in a small voice, eyes wide. "You cheated? On Mom?"

Carlisle stood as well, pushing his chair back violently and ignoring both Emmett and me.

"You were never to say a thing about that!" he yelled, forcing Alice to stand as well, hands going between them.

"Sit down, both of you," she said, earning their shocked looks before they slowly sank back into their chairs.

Alice looked at all of us and fought hard to keep the anger off her face.

"This discussion is not a blame game. It is a means to find resolution and help," she said forcefully.

"Dad?" Emmett asked, still stunned. "Did you?"

Carlisle fingered the edge of the table, not looking at anyone.

"Your mother forgave me. It was something I needed," he muttered, his eyes flitting up to mine briefly. "Until your mother forbade me to see her and she found herself a new toy to play with."

His look was acidic as he glared at me.

I had been the new toy?

"That's why you were so mad?" I asked, stunned. "Not because of what I was doing but because you were jealous?"

He laughed darkly and shook his head.

"You're not so different from me really, Edward," he said, grinning. "But Esme can't see that. She wants you to be normal, but you'll never be."

"That's not true, Carlisle," Esme said angrily. "You will not poison Edward's mind anymore! You will not stay here as long as you say those things!"

He turned to her, surprised.

"Wait, what?"

"You can't stay here, Carlisle," she said, more sure of herself. "You need to leave until you can prove to me that you have us in your best intentions."

"You don't mean that," he scoffed.

"Yes, I do," she confirmed.

"I won't leave. This is my house," he said, starting to rise again.

Alice put her hand up and silenced him.

"Esme has the authority here, Carlisle. You know how it goes. And I am not afraid to call the police here, Carlisle and have them escort you out," Alice warned.

"No," I said loudly, panicking.

No way was I going to handle that humiliation with Chief Swan witness to my fucked up family.

Carlisle leered at me.

"No, we wouldn't want that," he said pointedly. "Wouldn't want your new little girlfriend to be embarrassed. Have you told her everything about your issues, Edward?"

"You don't get to talk about her!" I seethed, ready to pounce.

He wouldn't fuck up my chances with Bella.

"Let's get back to how to resolve this," Alice interjected and looked fully at Carlisle, who was shaking his head in denial.

"There's nothing to discuss," he said.

"Well, Carlisle we can do this two ways," Alice said, taking control again.

He glared at her but remained quiet.

"You have two options, Carlisle," she stated. "One, you go into counselling, and you provide proof that you are willing to change. But you need to not stay here until you can prove to Esme that you are making progress."

"And the second?" he spat.

"I tell the medical board everything and you lose your licence, your well being and your family."

"You wouldn't do that," he said angrily.

"Yes, I can," she stated, a frightening smile on her face. "As a professional, Carlisle, I am obligated to report you regardless. But we have a history. And you have a family that cares. I am willing to treat you, and Esme and Edward. Even Emmett should he want it. And I am willing to take Esme's lead on whether this relationship is worth saving. Is this relationship worth saving?"

"That's up to Esme," he grunted.

"Yes, it is," Alice replied simply.

"Either way I need to leave my home," he said, more as a statement than a question.

"Yes."

He looked from Esme to me, and then to Emmett.

Emmett had been quiet for so long I had forgotten he was there.

"You cheated on Mom?" he asked again, his voice like a lost boy.

Carlisle remained silent.

It was quiet for a long moment.

No one moved.

And then Emmett stood up suddenly, towering over all of us.

"You cheated on Mom! Get the fuck out!" he screamed, slamming his hands down on the table enough to make it tip towards him.

"Emmett," Carlisle said, a pathetic plea to him.

"No!" he hollered and moved to stand behind Esme. "You betrayed us! You lied to us! You hurt us! You don't deserve to stay here! Get the fuck out! And don't ever come back!"

"Emmett," I said, standing so that I could move to stand beside him.

He looked at me and shook his head.

"He lied to us, Ed," he wailed. "He fucked you up, and he fucked around behind Mom's back! He doesn't deserve to have us in his life!"

I nodded and stood beside Emmett, both of us putting a steadying hand on Esme's shoulder.

Alice turned to Carlisle, both of them slowly rising from their seats.

"It's your choice what choice you make, Carlisle," she said calmly. "But it's their choice whether to accept you back."

He looked at us hard, saying nothing before striding out of the kitchen. We heard his car rev, heard the gravel outside as he pulled out quickly, and it wasn't until the silence followed that anyone moved. Alice sat back down and nodded for us to do so as well.

Emmett hugged Esme hard before sitting beside her, holding onto her as if she might disappear. I felt strangely detached, numb almost from what had just happened. I wasn't sure how to feel.

Esme had just stood up for all of us, and had willingly torn the family apart.

"You need to tell them what you feel comfortable with," Alice was saying to Esme, who was wiping at her cheeks, nodding.

Alice looked my way and held her hand out to me. I took it tentatively.

"We're going to fix this, in whatever way is best for all of you," she said quietly. "But I want you to understand that you are nothing like him. Nothing at all."

I nodded, afraid to argue.

I wasn't so sure.

Both of us had been with Tanya.

That had to mean something.

"Esme, do you want me to stay?" Alice asked.

"No, I can do this part,"Esme murmured.

Alice stood and gathered her things.

"It'll get better," she said to us. "You just have to be there for each other, okay?"

We all murmured our agreement and she turned to me.

"I'll see you on Saturday?" she asked gently.

"Of course," I responded automatically.

I needed to figure this out. I needed to know I truly was normal.

Alice said her goodbyes, leaving us with Esme, who pulled us closer, hands in hers, and relayed to us a story none of us wanted to hear, but needed to regardless.

She spoke quietly, about a life before us.

About a world of pleasure and pain. Control and submission.

About she and Carlisle choosing to live differently, to give us a chance.

She talked about how she found out about Carlisle and Tanya.

I was stunned to hear that Tanya had been the one to be controlled to Carlisle's dominant behaviour. I was her foray into dominating someone else.

Emmett looked at me thoughtfully as Esme relayed her life, and her fears about what had happened between Tanya and I. She cried when she begged me to forgive her for letting me down. I hugged her tighter and opened my mouth to relay what I had kept hidden for so long.

Except to Carlisle.

He knew it all.

And that scared me.

About how Tanya had offered me pleasure if I behaved.

At punishing me for not pleasing her.

For keeping me from having sex, because if I did, she'd tire of me. She wanted me left wanting. Starving.

It was quiet as we all sat there, absorbing our confessions.

Emmett slowly pulled away and let out a long breath.

"I've been screwing Rose in the gym bathroom for three months," he said, huffing in relief at his admission.

Well that explained why Bella thought he was a perverted ass.

"Don't do that any more, Em," I said, shaking my head. "She deserves better."

Esme looked up at us and pulled us closer.

"Don't treat them like objects boys," she whispered against our shoulders. "Cherish them like they are the most important parts of your life."

I knew this already.

I felt it in my heart that Bella belonged with me.

So as I laid in bed, in the silence of our house, I couldn't get comfortable.

I had been told that I was normal.

A heavy weight had been lifted from our home with Carlisle leaving.

I wasn't sure I could handle the feeling.

Something was missing.

I crawled out of bed, knowing what I needed.

I needed normal.

I needed honest and good.

I needed Bella.

~~oo~~

AN: *sobbing in emotional PMS state*

No lie… I should never write while I am pmsing… JS… I cry at Folger's commercials. I'm a dork. lol

So this was super long. I'm going to take a little reprieve tomorrow.

I know… but I promise… the next chapter will be worth it…

Love to all of you… I'm going to go eat a pound of chocolate and watch a chick flick… cuz I'm emotional….

MWAH!

See you Friday!

steph