Hi I am back sorry it took so long to update. I had a bit of writer's block but now I am certain of where I want to go. I had some inspiration from the late Mrs Whitney Houston. Thanks for all the reviews and those of you who made this story as your favourite. It means a lot to me. On with the story now!

It's not right but it's ok

Dinner had been a tense but enjoyable affair once Alex and the children recovered from their afternoon from hell. Maria and Alyssa went out of their way to prepare for the whole family along with their last minute guests. The food made everyone's mouths water the moment they saw the food dished up. The food ranged from roast chicken, steak, lamb and pork to a range of different pastas, curries and salads. Dessert just made the affair even more uplifting with ice cream with chocolate mouse on top, chocolate cake, custard and fruit salad, everyone had eaten their fill.

"Dinner had been a lovely affair tonight Alex, I hope we can all do this sometime with the rest of CID when you and the kids are up for it." Said Ray as the group stared to part from Alex's doorstep.

"After this afternoon, it might take a while." Sighed Alex

"Hey hey, look at me Alex, you are going to be fine, and those kids are a testimony of just how good of a mother you are. It's not easy raising kids on your own especially when their father is such an uncaring bastard." Replied Ray.

"He is your superior you know."

"Yeah well, until he starts to act like one then he won't get my respect."

Alex just smiled and hugged Ray, it was easy to see the effect that Melody had over him.

"I'll see you tomorrow eh Guv?"

"Yeah, count on it."

As Ray and Melody finally exited the door with the rest of the team Alex closed the door and leaned on it and sighed heavily. Today had been going great until her fight with Gene occurred. She couldn't really blame him for the way he had acted after all she had prevented him from becoming a father. Deep down she knew that Gene had always secretly harboured the desire to someday have children of his own and show them off to his team in Luigis. He didn't have to say it because she could see it in his eyes after Jackie Queen had tricked him and that had hurt him. And now she just added to those wounds by keeping his children away from him. Alex then stopped and shook her head mentally, why was she feeling sorry for him? Why the hell was she blaming herself for his mistakes? If it wasn't for him acting like a cold hearted bastard towards her then she would never have left. If he had only apologised for the cruel things he had said and also for the injustice that he had placed on her then they could've had something. They could've been married by now and maybe trying for a third kid but no he acted like a stubborn spoilt child and made her life hell. So again why is she beating herself up for his arrogant stupidity?

Alex shook her head in order to get rid of her emotions. She didn't want to acknowledge the feeling that was nagging deep down inside her. She lifted her hand to her chin and closed her eyes as she remembered the way Gene had roughly pulled her face up to his that afternoon and a shiver ran through her as she remembered his touch. There was that feeling again so Alex quickly snapped out of her dream and allowed her cold calculating side to take over again as she silently vowed to maintain her cool when around Gene. Nodding to herself she went over to the kid's bedrooms to check on them. Violet was curled under her duvet, her little brunette head peaking out of the covers as she snored. In the other bedroom Eugene was curled up in a foetal position underneath his car duvet, a lock of floppy blonde hair covering his left eye as he too snored. Maria had done a great job putting them to sleep after dinner by reading to both of them even though the two was not on speaking terms due to their fight about their father.

Alex shuffled along to her bedroom and went into the bathroom and made herself a nice hot lavender bubble bath. She lit some candles and placed her Whitney Houston CD into her HI-Fi system and allowed the sweet melodies to fill the room, the latest 80s edition, not as good as the technology back home in 2008 but it will have to do. After setting the temperature of the water she undressed herself and silently slipped into the bathtub and laid her head on the wall and let the lavender fragrances wash over her. She had been in the tub for over an hour before she started to turn in.

She didn't sleep well. Her dreams were taunting her. Images of her and Gene on the night they consummated their love flowed into her mind. Alex tossed and turned as flashbacks of that night swam across her mind. His kiss, his eyes, his touch, his beautiful hands and those magician like fingers, playing her like an instrument as she sobbed his name in ecstasy. She remembered his bare chest and how she skimmed her hands across it and over his shoulders as she clung on to him for dear life while they made love. She remembered his powerful long legs, his muscle toned arms as he lifted her up and over his body. She pictured wrapping her legs around him as she sang to the heavens, she never felt so beautiful in her life. He made her feel like a goddess. She wanted that feeling again. Alex then woke up covered in sweat, breathing hard as she tried to clear her head of those erotic images. What they had was over. It had been over for a long time. But goddamn it she still loved him and she still wanted him.

It's not right but it's ok.

Across town Gene was having the same dreams as Alex as he too tossed and turned under the covers, he could literally feel her. He often dreamt of holding her, basking in the sweet afterglow of their sweet, sweet love making. The flashbacks of their night of passion was being replayed over and over in his head, he had banished that memory the moment she had left but now it was all coming back to him in full force. Ever since he was told of Alex's return he had been having fantasies of her and was often dreaming of their erotic night together but tonight was something different, almost like he was connected to Alex, like she was sharing the same dream as him. The images taunted and teased him. Him quickly untying her robe to revel her satin pyjamas, her tearing off his coat and blazer, him ripping off her top, her ripping off his shirt, buttons flying everywhere, him lifting her up and carrying her through to the bedroom, feeling her laced covered breast crushed against his bare chest, both of them falling in bed together, her smooth skin against his, her sweet strawberry kisses, the way she cried out for him as they made love and those beautiful legs wrapped around him as she took him to paradise. All these intense images was becoming too much for him. Gene's eyes quickly flashed open and he sat up. He tried to control his breathing while he looked around the room. Empty. Always sodding empty and now he was horny and craving the touch of a woman who he hated and adored equally. The woman who happened to be the mother of his kids.

He knew he will have to make his move soon, it was his call, and the ball was in his court. He was angry about Alex leaving him and never telling him about the kids but after going through everything in his mind he knew that a lot of this was his fault. He should've swallowed his pride and apologised the moment it had been clear that she was right all long. But like the idiot that he was he had let a good thing slip away and now he was on the verge of losing his kids. His daughter wanted to get to know him but what if the fight caused her to change her mind? His son was already starting to loathe him, he didn't need Alex to tell him that because he could see it in his eyes the moment he had recognised him and hid his sister behind him while standing in front of him. He remeberered his son's blue eyes blazing in anger and protectiveness for his family. He remembered how his son had grabbed hold of Alex's hand and squeeze it when Alex had flinched and trembled in his prescience after her secret had gotten out. No. He knew that his son hated him and he knew it because that was the same way he acted when he was reminded of his own father and all of the terrible things he had done to his mam and to him and his brother Stu when they were kids. He was running out of time. He had to act fast but he would also have to trek carefully, if he ever had a chance of getting to know his children and maybe rekindle the magic with Alex then he would have to play his cards right. He would have to start from scratch.

It's not right but it it's ok.