Quiet parked itself at the table once more and Jimmy searched for something to say to banish the unwelcome guest and, looking across the table, he thought Faith was doing the same thing.

"I'm sorry," he said at last and in all his years, he'd never meant those words more than he did at that moment.

Faith's puzzlement was evident.

"I don't understand; if anyone should be sorry, it's me. I'm being a terrible hostess."

Jimmy shook his head. He was the reason she was uncomfortable. He knew it.

"Faith, I know I make you uncomfortable. I did from the start," he held up a hand to quiet her protestations, "What happened last night shouldn't have. Hell that just confirmed everything you feared about me. You're hurting and lonely, I should have been stronger. It shouldn't have happened that soon."

"Jimmy," Faith spoke up, no longer able to stay quiet, "What happened was what I wanted, what I needed. I'm not sorry for it and I don't blame you at all. I don't feel uncomfortable with you specifically. I'm so out of practice at being with people that I'm uncomfortable around everyone."

"Out of practice or not, I think you're nicer to be with than most people I know," he said and then realizing how his words might be misinterpreted added, "Not because…"

She giggled and allowed her cheeks to flush, not from embarrassment or shame but with the memories of how he made her feel.

"I'm serious, Faith," he asserted.

"I know," she replied still smiling, "I'm not laughing at you. I'm happier when I'm around you and I guess being happy makes me giggle."

"I make you happy?" he asked with wonder.

She nodded.

He saw her smile fade as if she thought perhaps she had said something wrong but Jimmy felt quite the contrary; she said the most right thing he had ever heard.

"What can I do right now?" he asked sincere, "What will make you happy?"

"Kiss me."

He flashed that little boy smile and crossed the short distance to her. Jimmy crouched next to her, took her face in his hands and kissed her. Tender and gentle, this was no torrid kiss and yet it was far from chaste. This kiss spoke of intent but not a short-term intent of giving in to fevered passion. This was more a promise; a promise Jimmy was surprised to find himself making-surprised but confident.

Jimmy broke his lips away from hers and searched her for some reaction. Faith blinked at him and her shock was evident across her entire face.

"Is that what you had in mind?" he asked innocently.

Faith's laughter was the only answer.

"I hope you're laughing 'cause you're happy and this isn't some comment on my kissing."

She stood and cleared the dishes still giggling.

"It's happiness alright. I haven't had a kiss make me feel quite like that since Aaron and I were courting."

Jimmy would have to have been a blind man to miss the shadow of sadness passing over her features.

"Tell me about him. What was he like?" Jimmy finally asked as he took up a cloth to dry the dishes as she washed them.

"Aaron? Oh, you don't want to hear about him," she stated.

"I do," he argued, "But more than that, I think you need to talk about him."

"Talking about him feels too much like living in the past. I've done enough of that."

He smiled to himself and sighed before speaking.

"I spend a lot of time running from ghosts," he began, "I'm afraid to admit how much they meant to me because I can't have them in my life anymore. And then I'm too afraid-not that I admit fear or anything-to let anyone else be for me what they were. Being with you, I can talk about them and feel glad for what they were to me and then hope all the more for maybe what you could be, what we could be."

He laid the cloth on the counter and turned to look into her bewildered eyes.

"Remembering him, admitting you love him, talking about him; that's not living in the past. It's knowing where you came from so you can figure where you're going," he stopped himself a moment realizing how like Teaspoon he was sounding.

"You still love him. A blind man could see that. Loving him don't mean you can't love me or someone else, if you've a mind to."

Faith looked away and Jimmy quickly added, "Not that you need to even think on that right now."

He said the last as much to save himself from rejection as to take any pressure from her.

As Jimmy dried the last dish and set it in the cupboard, he suggested that perhaps they could sit on the porch a bit and enjoy the night air. They settled on the swing and Jimmy could hardly hide his disappointment as Faith sat on the opposite end leaving nearly enough room for another person between them. She sat stiffly and he found himself, yet again, confused by her behavior.

"You must think me a fool," she said at last, "I try to refuse your help and then drag you to my bed and now I'm acting like a virgin contemplating her wedding night. If I could explain this to you, I would. I really would."

Her voice was shaking and he was certain he could see her eyes shining more than usual in the scant moonlight.

"Let me try then," he said softly, "You are scared. Last night happened and I guess we both needed it for our own reasons but we didn't do a lot of thinking beforehand. You're hurting and you're still in love with a man you can't have anymore. Am I close?"

Faith nodded and began speaking.

"Yesterday you were so kind to me and it felt so good to have your arms around me but last night wasn't about you and I feel bad about that."

She turned where she sat and placed a hand over his own that rested on his knee.

"Aaron and I used to sit here together and when you put your arm around me, it brought the same comfort. I thought I could get that feeling back but the feelings were all different-not bad, please don't misunderstand-but different. I feel so torn apart. I know I can't have him ever again but I want him. And I want you too. I do. I think I might love you but I'll always love him still and I don't know if that's fair to you. I feel guilty. I'm not being fair to you and I feel like I'm betraying Aaron."

She was still willing the tears to stay put and not fall but when Jimmy pulled her close and wrapped her in his arms, Faith's will broke. She cried, wailed and balled her fists against the unfairness of fate that took what mattered most and left her behind with nothing but the pain and loss. Jimmy just held her tight, mostly silent but occasionally attempting a soothing word or two. He did not try to shush her or to elicit speech from her. She needed to cry and let out her pain as surely as the night before she had needed to dull it with pleasure. He decided that he'd sit on that swing holding her until the end of time if need be.

Faith's tears did slow in time though Jimmy wasn't sure if it was from exhaustion, dehydration or if she was really done crying. He just continued to hold her, smoothing her hair and rocking the swing gently.

"Please don't leave," she whispered so quietly he almost didn't hear her.

"Why would I do a silly thing like leave you?" he asked.

"Because I'm a mess and far more trouble than I'm worth. I kept expecting you to leave and I even talked myself into being fine with it if you did leave but I'm not fine with it and I want you to stay."

He smiled into her hair and kissed the top of her head before speaking.

"I guess it's a good thing I don't want to leave then, isn't it?"

She looked toward the front door and with resignation said, "I suppose it's time for bed."

Jimmy still held fast to her. He'd never pressured a woman and he wasn't about to be the reason a woman did something she didn't want to do.

"Faith," he said tenderly, "It's not time for bed until you realize and understand that what happens there hasn't been decided. I don't think you're in any shape to do much but try to get some sleep. If you disagree, let me know but I think you don't need to worry yourself. I'm not going away."

"I don't have anything else to offer," she responded.

"Oh, you've got plenty else to offer," he said chuckling, "But it doesn't matter because I don't need a thing from you. I don't think you appreciate what you've given me already."

Faith remained silent in Jimmy's arms a while longer before she asked simply, "Is it time for bed now?"

Jimmy pulled back from her far enough to look her in the eyes before responding, "You tell me."

She nodded and rose heading for the door. He followed her to her room and then paused in the doorway awaiting an invitation. Faith turned to see him hovering here and nodded for him to enter the room. She began to undress in order to change into her night gown and he stripped to his long johns. Jimmy climbed into bed and sat there, leaning his back against the head board, transfixed as she brushed her long brown hair. She was an absolute goddess and she wasn't even aware. She seemed oblivious to his rapt attention as she wound her hair into a braid. What he would give to bear witness to this simple moment every night.

She turned and saw him watching her and it caused the color to rise to her cheeks. He saw her begin to fluster.

"You never did tell me about him," he said, "Aaron, I mean."

"I don't know what there is to tell," she said climbing onto the bed and sitting stiffly against the headboard, "He was a good man and we loved each other."

"There's plenty more to tell," he said trying to hide his frustration, "How you met, what he looked like; he's here and there's no denying him but if you get him out in the open, he can't get between us."

Faith drew her knees up and hugged them to her chest then rested her head on them facing him and let her eyes half close with the memories.

"He was tall and strong and his eyes were the deepest brown I'd ever seen. They were almost black but when he smiled, which was often, they would sparkle so and when he laughed, they would dance. I think I loved him from the moment I first saw those eyes across the counter from me in my father's store. I wasn't sure at first if he felt the same but he was back in the store every afternoon after that for some small thing or another. He didn't say much; a remark on the weather or some such thing but every day I would rush from school to work and wait for him to stop in. One day when he came he seemed even less talkative; in fact, he didn't say anything at all. He nodded when he walked in instead of 'Good afternoon, Miss Mattson' as I'd grown accustomed. He kept browsing a display of canned goods some distance from the counter and sneaking glances at me. I went over to see if he was having trouble finding what he needed. He didn't even turn to look at me but said, 'Miss Mattson, I wonder if you'd do me the honor of letting me escort you to the dance this Saturday.' I said yes, of course and that was really all there was to it. We were married a year later."

Jimmy watched fascinated as her eyes looked beyond the years and rediscovered that young love. He was jealous of Aaron Lassiter; not because Aaron had been with Faith and had married her but because it was all a man could ask for to have a woman speak of him so.

Faith looked up at Jimmy for a response but he was unable to come up with anything to say about her story. He wasn't sure how he felt sharing her with the memories of that man that time would only elevate further in her mind.

"I see you picked up Adam's toys today," was all he could muster.

"It was time," she nodded with an odd look in her eyes, sadness mixed with resolve and a hint of something he knew only a parent could fully name; "The Jenkins' have a passel of boys. I thought I'd take Adam's things to them."

"Why not keep them? You might have another child someday."

She shook her head and fought the tears.

"Adam was a miracle. The doctor said I'd never be able to conceive at all and if I did, I'd not carry a child long. I made it the whole nine months and he was healthy and strong and perfect. I cherished him so."

Her tears broke free and Jimmy pulled her to him. He knew there was no real comfort he could give Faith aside from not having to be alone as she cried. He hoped that was enough.

"I don't think there's a rule that says you only get one miracle," he said tenderly, "It hasn't happened doesn't mean it won't."

She nodded and gripped him tighter and he carefully slid the both of them beneath the covers, her head on his chest.

"You need some sleep, sweetheart," he whispered, "I've got you; just relax and get some rest."

She nodded her head against him and Jimmy found himself surprised when she did relax and soon her breathing was deep and even. He inhaled deeply the scent of soap and fresh air that hung on her hair and whispered, "I love you."

Not even sure I can talk about Jimmy and Faith right now...really sad about Amy Winehouse. Her life may have been like the car accident you don't want to look at but just have to slow down and check out anyway but she was a truly talented woman. So very sad that she's gone so young. So, yeah, let me know what you think of the story. I don't think there's much more to the story but I'm still not sure how it ends.-J