Just a quickie ;op to fill the gap. Hope you Enjoy, Cleo xx
"What?" Tilly announces, with a much more serious look on her face. 'Maybe she is just nervous' the teen concluded clearly still in a state of denial.
"it's alright to be nervous.." she adds, smiling again in an attempt to regain her lovers positive outlook "...once we get going it will be fine.." she continue.
"No Tilly" Jen interrupts the teenager as she babbles nervously. "I took the job at Hollyoaks Sixthform." Tilly's face drops immediately at the news.
"You can't have...you would of told me." The teen replies, not really sure what is happening.
"I should have ." Jen replies, staring at her hands; feeling suddenly ashamed of her silence.
Tilly stares ahead lost 'Why had Jen not told her something like this...why would she have not discussed it with her. ' her mind swirls with confusion. She says something to Jen but is not conscious of what; Jen is responding, all she can hear is a buzz. She stares blankly, gazing down, trying to fight the negative emotions filling her head. her mouth forcing her lips shut in a crooked line; She is struggling to process the confession from Jen. She tries to zone back in and drown out the tinnitus.
"...but that time is over for me now. its your turn." She hears the tail end of Jen's speech and looks up into her deep brooding eye; she notes the compassion, however, fails to believe it.
Everything she had done is to save Jen, for the relationship; is she alone in this? She stares intently at the brunette "I have given up everything for this... for you" she adds, fighting the tears and pain that is rising up within her, caused by the betrayal.
"Oh Tilly" Jen replies, noting the teen's suffering 'I know you have babe...that's why I have to stop this. I love you. see through this.' she answers in her head and instinctively tries to reach out to younger lover.
"Don't!" Tilly states, moving out of Jen's reach. Starring once more into her teachers eyes, allowing the brunette to see her pain; she storms away. She did not want Jen to witness her heart break as well, she felt so alone.
She takes two steps, her legs buckle , she falls into a crouch position on the floor. Jen runs to her, however, is stopped in her tracks ,as Tilly holds up her hand firmly in a stopping signal to halt her and keep her away. "Don't" she announces again. It is bad enough she had shown her pain and lost her pride; the last thing she needed is Jen's pity.
She exhales deeply and composes herself. "When?" she manages to say, in a half whisper; still facing the floor. Jen's eyes begin to fill with tears, she cannot bring herself to answer. "WHEN?" Tilly shouts, pulling herself up from the ground.
"Tilly I...W..What does it matter?" Jen answers, trembling as her tears begin to roll. The reply fuels Tilly's growing anger, the rage replacing her anguish.
"What does is matter? huh! probably nothing to you. but I want to know how many times have I let you kiss me since" She finally makes eye contact with the brunette. "How many times have I been touched by a stranger." she adds bitterly. Jen looks down at her hands, trying desperately to remain strong whilst her chest is collapsing.
"When Huxley green fell through..." Jen finally answers..
"Before the hotel?...I was with you that night" Tilly Interrupts.
Jen shakes her head "No not then I swear...Tilly...please" she begs; she is trying to protect her from the truth. 'God I'm destroying her.'
"When? Jen...I want to know the exact point where you betrayed me." Tilly demands. Jen looks up again with pleading eyes. "When?" Tilly states again. this time through gritted teeth. Jen knows she has to tell her lover the truth. She sighs hard.
"The phone call...the night we...Diane interrupted us...it was keeler." Jen answers slowly.
"Oh Jen.." Tilly replies, her anger dissolves back into anguish, tears stream down her cheeks now; she fidgets on the spot. "You were down stairs accepting the job...as I lay upstairs in YOUR bed... like a fool." she brings her hands to her face suddenly, in further realization "oh god...you came back upstairs after and fucked me Jen." she turns her back on the brunette. "I'm such an idiot." she states, more to her self than to the teacher. She walks away, slowly and without looking back; the teacher knows not to follow.