Jimmy knelt next to Faith gently brushing her hair away from her brow which had beaded with sweat. She looked so pale and fragile in his arms and he felt helpless.

"Faith, sweetheart," he said softly kissing her forehead and tapping lightly at her cheeks. He knew that usually you would slap at someone's face to wake them but he just couldn't bring himself to. "Open your eyes, please. I'm here."

After what seemed like an eternity Faith groaned and opened her eyes frowning at him.

"What happened?" she croaked.

"I'm not sure. A telegram came for you and once you read it, you lost your lunch over the rail and then just sort of collapsed."

Faith had been flushed when she had reawakened but the color left her quickly then and she shook her head almost violently as the tears pricked at her eyes.

"No, this isn't happening," she insisted although it sounded more like a plea but Jimmy wasn't sure who she was asking this of. "This is not happening. This cannot be happening."

Jimmy had no idea what was happening but Faith did not look well to him so he carried her inside the house and settled her on the couch before hurrying to fetch her a glass of cool water. Returning with the water he crouched next to where she lay on the couch and stroked her cheek tenderly.

"Tell me what's wrong," he pleaded.

"A-A-Aaron," she managed before tears obscured any other words she might have tried to form.

Jimmy was torn. He had no idea what she was talking about; he knew that if he went outside and picked up the telegram that all would be explained but on the other hand, Faith was crying and he couldn't leave her crying alone. So he kept his questions to himself and just held her tight to him as her tears soaked his shirt. In time those tears slowed and he dared to inquire further.

"What about Aaron?" he asked.

"He's alive."

Jimmy sank back onto his heels feeling like he'd just been punched—or maybe shot—in the gut. The one man Faith loved as much as him was alive.

"How long before he's here?"

"I don't know," she said, "It said he's still in a hospital somewhere in New York I think. He was injured in the head. He wasn't recognizable and when he came around he didn't know who he was or couldn't say. I'm not sure which. I don't know who they identified as him before or if they just assumed he was dead. I never had a body here to bury. This is not happening."

Jimmy didn't know what to say and therefore said nothing. Faith looked at him and searched his eyes for something but there was such a maelstrom within him she could make out nothing. It frightened her. She had no idea what to do and needed to know what he wanted, what he felt.

"Say something, please," she begged.

"I don't even know what to say," he told her honestly. It was taking all his concentration just to breathe. "I expect I'll need to be moving along soon though."

"You're leaving me?" she was incredulous.

"Faith, your husband is coming home. I don't figure he'd be too happy to find you playing house with another man, especially one of my kind."

"But we were going to be married," she protested.

"Yeah, only problem is that you already are."

"No, I don't think I am," she said, "He was declared dead, that has to mean something."

"Faith, honey," he said gently wanting to buy everything she said and take her in his arms and never ever let her go. It could work. He could marry her before Aaron got home and then she'd be his and no one could take that from him. He could have the simple life of a family man that he wanted so badly. Days of hard work and a real sense of accomplishment and nights next to Faith. But he couldn't. "You look me in the eye and tell me you don't still find yourself looking to that horizon wishing you'd see him coming over the hill; coming home to you. You do that and I'll haul you right into town and get us married today."

She raised her eyes to his and stared deeply into him and could not lie as badly as she wanted to be able to. Faith could see in his eyes how badly he wanted her to be able to say that she didn't still pine for Aaron a little bit at least but she could not and he seemed to grasp that fact and his eyes softened.

"It's alright," he said, "I knew from the first day here that I was in line behind him. I should be happy for you. This is a good thing, right?"

"You aren't leaving right away are you?"

"I guess I can stay a little while but I don't want to linger," he answered, "It'll only make it harder to leave you."

"Maybe if it's so hard then it isn't the right thing to do," she offered.

"I wish it weren't but I've learned a fair amount while appearing to most I hadn't learned a damn thing. I know the easy option usually ain't the right thing to do and the right thing to do is usually harder."

"But you gave up everything for me," she protested, "You can't leave. It's not right."

"I gave up a job I wasn't feeling too good about anyway," he said, "I got so much more than that."

"Where will you go?"

"Well, I'm closer to Rock Creek so I thought I'd head that way first and see if any of my family would have me back. Not sure what I'll do but I have a little money saved and it might just be enough to buy some land. If they're still too sore at me to want me around—which I'd understand if they were—I imagine I'll see what the prospects are in Omaha. I'd sure like to meet Emma's little ones."

Another communication came the next day telling of Aaron Lassiter's impending release from the hospital and that he would probably arrive within two weeks. Jimmy decided that meant he needed to leave in no longer than a week's time. Faith hated having a timetable for his departure. Knowing he was leaving her was bad enough but knowing when and having every minute that ticked by mean one less minute to be with him and one minute closer to being alone. It tore her up inside. She did love Aaron, his smile, his eyes, the way he would bring her a wildflower he happened to pass because its beauty reminded him of hers. But Jimmy had a passion and a fire that she never knew existed anywhere in the world and even if she had known of such a thing she never would have guessed to look within herself. He had taught her so much about herself and about love and healing and redemption and forgiveness. She had finally forgiven herself for everything; for not fighting harder to keep Aaron from joining the army, for Adam's death, for everything that had gone so terribly wrong in her life. She was in love with two men and that wasn't fair to either of them or to her but it was the fact of the situation nonetheless.

Faith tried to keep busy that week and spent every minute she could with Jimmy even if it was just sitting alongside while he did chores or cleaned his guns which he had taken to doing every night. One of those nights she dared ask why. He hadn't fired them since the day he taught her to shoot. They could not need the cleaning that much.

Jimmy stared blankly at her for a moment or two trying to find an answer to her question. In honesty he wasn't all that sure himself but he thought on it anyway.

"I guess it's an old habit," he said, "When I needed them every day it made sense to clean them every day and make sure they wouldn't let me down. Part of it is that I'm riding through some rough country here pretty soon and I need to know when I grab for one of these that it'll come through for me."

He paused and thought a bit more.

"I guess the other part is I know I might be heading into another life like the old one where all I really am is these guns. And one where all I really have are the guns. I don't know how else to say it. Guns aren't people but sometimes they're all you have. Maybe I was feeling guilty for having neglected such old friends like I have. I don't know."

He looked at her again and could not gauge her reaction at all.

"Hell maybe I just needed something to do with my hands," he added.

He looked up again to see one of Faith's eyebrows arched.

"What?" he asked.

"Come with me," she said taking his hand and pulling him toward the door.

"Faith, it's late. Where are you dragging me to?"

"Oh don't be silly," she chided him, "How late would Wild Bill stay up? Why, I'll bet he'd tell you the night is still young and if a woman was dragging you somewhere you'd be a fool not to go along."

"But I'm not-"

"You're not Wild Bill," she finished for him, "Seems like you're preparing to become him again. Doesn't Jimmy do anything crazy and impetuous?"

"Faith, morning comes early," he still protested but he didn't know why he felt he needed to.

"Oh sleep in tomorrow. You're gone day after anyway. Besides you owe me this."

"How do I owe you this?"

"Remember that day that Patience's letter came and you said I could have anything I want and I said there was something else I wanted but it would be a surprise? Well, this is going to be your surprise if you'd quit dragging your feet and come with me."

At that Jimmy gave in and followed willingly to the path that broke from the main trail near the house and all the way to a pond.

"Isn't it beautiful how the water shimmers in the moonlight?" she asked smiling at him. If she was only two have a couple more nights with him she was going to find a way to enjoy them.

"Yes it is," he agreed but he was looking more at the way the moonlight illuminated her face. He had stopped walking close enough to nearly be brushing against her and the energy he felt pulsing between them was hard to ignore. He had been feeling guilty the whole week every time he touched her or kissed her. It hadn't stopped him from touching her or kissing her or holding her tight or making love to her but he'd felt guilty all the same. Right then in that moment he felt no guilt or shame and he raised his hand and quickly pulled the comb from her hair and watched those lovely tresses come cascading down around her shoulders. "Are we here to admire the water?" he asked in a husky voice.

"No we're here to go for a swim," she replied, her hands working at the buttons of his shirt.

"Why are we here in the middle of the night? Wouldn't it make more sense to swim during the day?"

"There are people here during the day," she explained, "You wouldn't want a bunch of kids from town coming upon me swimming in my altogether now would you? And besides, if we're swimming here without our clothing, who's to say we wouldn't be come impassioned and feel the need to do more than swim? Now I know I would prefer to not be interrupted if that was to happen. And I think it's very likely to happen."

Jimmy's shirt was open and she leaned in and made a trail of kisses across his chest.

"I would imagine that could be very possible," he said helping her with the buttons on her dress. It didn't take very long for the two of them to be standing next to the pond naked as the day they were born. Jimmy wanted to touch her, to caress her, to lower her to the ground and—

"Last one in is a rotten egg!" Faith called out as she ran toward the water. Jimmy stood stunned for only a second and then broke into a run after her. Which one of them was in fact a rotten egg was debatable but soon they were both in the water splashing at each other like children. Faith was giggling and Jimmy soon found himself laughing as well. It felt good to just have fun and it felt even better to hear her laugh after the week she'd had, the week they'd both had. She swam to him almost close enough for him to reach out and touch but then she just swam lazy circles around him. She was on her back mostly floating but moving her hands or feet once in a while to keep her course and propel herself through the water. The way she was, Jimmy could see her breasts peeking out of the water and her long hair stuck to her shoulders. Even in the cool water he could not help the response from below his waist. He lunged and grabbed her around her middle and pulled her to him.

"Well, hello," she said with a smirk, "Whatever did I find?"

Her fingers lightly traced his growing erection and Jimmy's eyes began to slide closed only to fly open when her whole hand tightened around him and began pumping up and down his length. His breath quickened as he was lost momentarily in the sensations but he came to his senses and clamped his hand over hers before bringing his lips to her neck.

"You know I'm not much for subtle," he whispered in her ear, his breath cooling her wet neck giving her chills. "What is it you want, Faith?"

Faith batted her lashes and smiled her sweetest smile at him.

"I only want what I want every time I have you naked," she said, sugar dripping from her words along with unveiled lust.

Jimmy planted his feet more solidly in the bottom of the pond and ran his hands down her sides and along the contours of her backside. Bending over he continued down to the backs of her thighs and then between them. The sigh that escaped her lips then drove away all thoughts of a slow and tender encounter. He grabbed her thighs and wrapped her legs around him and quickly guided himself into her.

Faith thought she would die of need while he was tenderly running his hands over her body and then more quickly even than he could draw his Colt he was inside her and she could not hold back the moan that escaped her.

"Yeah, that's what I wanted," she said arching her back and grinding her hips into his.

Jimmy settled his hands on her hips and held them tight raising and lowering her as his hips bucked almost of their own accord. He could feel the water swirling around them stirred by their movements and the cool of the water contrasted to the heat of her body. It was like nothing he'd ever felt before. He could feel Faith's legs start to quiver around him as her muscles became rigid and she screamed out his name to the night. When his release came a few sharp thrusts later he felt as if he was exploding into her.

Faith's legs and arms went limp and she allowed herself to relax back into the water and float away from Jimmy. Her whole body was vibrating and she could feel her walls fluttering, the muscles tensing and relaxing faster than she could even acknowledge. She was only vaguely aware that she was humming though right then she couldn't possibly have told anyone what the tune was called.

Jimmy watched her float away and almost grabbed her out of a fear that she'd drown but then he took note of the contented smile on her face and the soft melody she was humming. He thought he had heard it once before but it was some piece of music that didn't have words and was written by some foreign guy in Europe or somewhere so he didn't know the name of it. He just watched her nude form glide lazily through the water as the moonlight shimmered around her.

"Come float with me, Jimmy," she said quietly, "It's perfect."

"I can't," he answered, "I can't swim."

"I didn't say swim. I said float," she clarified her voice so relaxed that she could have hypnotized nearly anyone right then and she nearly had Jimmy going with her. "Besides, you agreed to come in knowing you couldn't swim."

"I can touch bottom. It's not very deep."

"Then there's nothing to fear," she said so soft and tranquil he just had to believe it. "If you start to sink you just put your feet down. But you won't sink. People float. Just go limp. Let your head fall back and your feet float up."

He did as he was told. This was Faith and she'd never allow him to be hurt. He relaxed and felt himself drift backwards into the water and as she said, his feet floated up. Before he knew it, he was floating atop the water. It was magical floating there with the stars twinkling in the blackness overhead. There was a willow at pond's edge and he could see a soft rustle within it as a bird readied and took flight. Half of the time he could hear nothing but the muted swishing of the water in his ears and the rest of the time he heard crickets chirping accented only by the occasional hoot of an owl. Right there might just as well have been heaven for all he knew. A new sound joined the others as Faith began humming that tune again.

"What's that song you're humming, sweetheart?"

Faith wracked her brain a moment and then it came to her.

"It's a sonata by Beethoven," she said, "Part of one anyway. The second movement of the Pathetique Sonata. I remember Patience playing it over and over when she took piano lessons. I always loved the tune."

"It sure is pretty," he agreed.

They floated like that for a few minutes admiring the stars, their hands linked together. Jimmy felt a pang of sadness that with every day that he spent with Faith he discovered some new and wonderful thing and the many wonderful things he would now miss out on because he would not be with her.

"I guess it's time we got out of the water before we shrivel up to nothing," Faith said sounding like she'd rather stay until they did indeed shrivel to nothing.

The two left the heaven they had found floating dreamily in the water and Faith headed for her clothes but Jimmy took her wrist.

"See how soft that grass looks under that willow? It'd sure be a shame to waste grass that soft by heading home now," he said, "I'll bet the stars are just as shiny from there as they are from the pond."

Faith smiled knowing he didn't want the night to end any more than she did. Soon they were snuggled in each other's arms gazing at the stars through the embracing branches of the willow tree.

"I don't suppose it matters much that I love you," Faith said startling Jimmy from his brooding.

"It matters a whole awful lot," he replied bringing her hand to his lips and planting soft kisses on it. "It doesn't change the right thing to do but it matters. I did mean to marry you, Faith, I really did. I could love you forever. I'm sure I will actually. But you're not mine."

"I'm not his either," she said softly, "That's what you taught me, Jimmy. I'm not property and I have worth and value outside of a man. My own desires are important and what makes me happy is important. Don't you care that you make me happy?"

She sat up and looked down at him until he sat up as well and pushed the hair from her face, his hand lingering on her cheek.

"Were you happy with him?" he asked, "Before he left, I mean. Did he make you happy? Did you love him and want to make sure you kissed him each time you parted?"

Faith looked down, "Yes," she admitted softly.

"I'm glad I made you happy again," he continued, "You deserve happiness no matter what your rotten sister says. I wish it could be my place to give you all that but I know it's not. You love him. You never stopped loving him and I could take that when he was dead or, you know, when we thought he was. I can't stay with you knowing the man you love more is still out there and I'd be keeping you from him. I love you far too much for that."

"Will you write sometimes and let me know how you are?" she asked, "I'll still worry."

She felt a chill steal across her shoulders and then Jimmy's arms tightening around her obviously blaming the night air for her shudder. In fact she was remembering the dream she'd had the night before. It was the same nightmare as before. She was in town and saw him—but not him, Wild Bill—and then the shots rang out and she ran to him and felt the life slip from his body as she held him tight. The difference this time was the man who had shot him didn't run. He hovered over the pair in the street. Faith looked up to see Aaron looking back at her. He didn't speak, just nodded for her to come with him. His eyes were hard and cold, not the warm laughing eyes she remembered, not the ones she fell in love with. He frightened her and she found herself in the dream preferring to stay in the street holding a corpse than to follow the man she had married and bore a son. She woke terrified and clung even tighter to Jimmy. Something was telling her that her future was no longer to be found with Aaron but it ought to be. This was news she had dreamt of and prayed for. Even after she had first taken up with Jimmy she longed for Aaron sometimes. Faith knew Jimmy would tell her it was just nerves at seeing her husband again. Perhaps it was at that.

Whatever was causing her troubled feelings, Faith was going to treasure every moment of this night with this man she loved so deeply. She continued to stare at him forcing an answer to her question.

"I'm not real good at letter writing but I'll try to get word to you every so often," he finally told her causing her to melt further into him.

They spent the rest of the night until near dawn holding each other and making love under the warm glow of the moon and the twinkling light of the stars.

When they wandered back to the house the next day, they were tired but neither one felt a great deal like sleeping. It was to be their last day together and they didn't want to let the other one out of their sight for any length of time. They did nothing of any real consequence that day but then each thought those were the best days of all. That night they went to bed early. They were both tired from not having slept the night before and Jimmy wanted to be off at first light. They readied for bed without words. Jimmy climbed under the covers first and laid there watching Faith brush her long brown hair and wind it into a braid. He had seen her do this many times and it never got old to him. This time though he wanted to look away to spare himself the thought that this would be the last time he would look upon this simple yet lovely sight. At last she was ready. She darkened the room on her way to the bed but then the same large moon as the night before shone through the window casting a soft and nearly magical glow upon them.

Jimmy held her in his arms but it was different. There was a distance between them that had never been there before. She rolled away from him and he curled around her until his body contoured to hers, like spoons in a drawer. He felt her nestle closer to him and then heard her breathing grow slow and even as sleep overtook her. He still could not sleep. This was going to make for a very long day of riding the next day and he truly hoped he would not meet trouble as he surely would not be up to defending himself against it. Instead of sleep he took in every sensation he could. He memorized the room, every shadow, every nook and cranny. He inhaled deeply the scent of her hair so fresh and clean. She never wore perfume and only lightly scented her baths and yet to him she smelled better than the women who used to visit him in town that smelled so strong of perfume. They always made him think of wilted bouquets. Faith smelled of sunshine and outdoors and her own sweat which was not foul in the slightest but sweet like honeyed fruit. He listened to the silence which was broken only by her soft breathing and the occasional coo she would make along with the random chirps of a cricket that had taken up residence outside the open window. The cricket had been there at least a week and a half and Jimmy had on one of its first nights there named the creature George since the thing had no plans to leave and was intent on talking to them all night every night. On this night George seemed to be keeping time with her breathing and soft sighs and coos. But the feeling Jimmy wanted most to remember and be able to call upon in the future was the way her warm body felt in his arms. How when they laid like this it felt as if they had been made as one piece and broken apart and had simply found each other so that they could fit back with their other half. She would sometimes shift in her sleep and rub closer against him. He closed his eyes to take in every sensation and realized that her nightgown had ridden up around her waist. She shifted slightly in her sleep causing her hips to wiggle and press her warm soft folds into his groin. If he was having trouble sleeping before then it was completely impossible now.

Jimmy's arm had been draped around her middle but now he moved it slowly to her bent knee and trailed his fingers up her thigh and over the curve of her hip. She made another soft noise and her backside rubbed against him again. He pressed against her and rubbed himself over her moistening heat. Her hips moved with his to create more friction and he thought then that she was awake. He was certain of it when she took his hand and moved it under her nightgown to rest upon her breast and gasped audibly when his fingers made circles around her nipple. He moved his hand only long enough to take hold of his erection and slide it into her. It was so soft and warm inside of her and right then it felt like the only place he ever wanted to be for the rest of his days. Jimmy lifted Faith's leg over his to allow him to get deeper into her and then let his hand trail from her breast to the spot between her legs that he knew ached for his touch. He could feel her pleasure build within her and then when he sent her over the edge. He needed more though.

She whimpered when he pulled out of her rolling her on her back. He pushed her nightgown over her head and tossed it to the foot of the bed before leaning back on his heels to look at her memorizing every curve, every rise and fall of her body.

"That's better," he said, "Now I can see you."

He traced her with his finger and his tongue finally settling both between her legs. His tongue circled the hardened nub bringing her closer to her bliss while his fingers pumped in and out of her speaking of things he still planned to do to her with a different appendage. He kept a maddening pace until she screamed out his name. It was still the sweetest sound he could think of. He quickly positioned himself to enter her and very slowly allowed his length to part her soft and still quivering folds. He moved slowly to draw this out. He knew it would be the last time he would make love to her and he wanted—no, needed—it to last. Once fully encased in her warmth he just as slowly withdrew almost completely and then back in. he lamented that he could not keep this pace up but he just needed her too badly and she was writhing beneath him urging him to a faster rhythm. His next thrust came even quicker and harder until he could hear their skin slapping together and her cries begging for more. He kept pumping in and out each time trying to go deeper within her, never feeling like he was quite far enough inside of her. If he could have somehow merged himself with her to live within her skin with her, to truly become one then he would have right then. Inside her to his very base was not close enough to her. If Jimmy could have lived in these few minutes forever he would have but he knew they would come to an end and they did. With the final few thrusts and her once again calling out his name and God's as well, he coated the inside of her walls with his release.

He was able to fall asleep after that with her in his arms but he woke before dawn all the same. That was good because he had places to go and he needed to put as much distance between himself and the dream existence he had been living as he could in the first day. He kept telling himself that while it was a home he was leaving it was also a home he was going to. It didn't help much but he hoped it would give solace the closer he got to his family.

Faith was quiet as Jimmy readied to leave. He didn't see her stuff a couple of things inside the old mochila he still carried, nor did he notice much as she packed a satchel of food for his trip. She had slept some after making love with him but her sleep was frequently interrupted by the nightmare and her own feelings of apprehension. She wanted to beg him to stay, fall to her knees and plead, cry, wail, whatever it would take for him to not get on that horse, for him to stay with her. Maybe he would just take her with him instead. Deep down though she knew that he would not take her with him and he would not stay and there was reason to his decision. So she held her stoic face for him as she watched him lead his horse out into the yard and offered a smile to him.

"I will always love you, you know that, right?" he said begging her to believe him.

She nodded and then gave up the stoicism and let the tears fall. Faith could not even find words to say to him but when he embraced her she whispered into his ear, "I love you James Hickok and I always will. I would have proudly been your wife. Please do something for me now."

He pulled back to look at her and hear her request.

"Be happy," she told him, "Find someone to share your life. You deserve it. Please, just be happy."

"I will because you wish it," he said before leaning to kiss her.

Those were the last words he would say to her but they were honest. He pulled himself into the saddle and rode away. He did not dare look back because he knew he could not leave her if he did and he knew he had to leave. It was the right thing to do after all.

Faith stood in the yard watching him ride away from her forever. She was alone again. She hugged her arms tight around herself and then sank to her knees right where she had stood. She sat and watched his shape grow smaller and smaller until she could not see him anymore and it was then she wept and wailed to the heavens, to God Himself if He was listening. Eventually she got up and started preparing for Aaron's arrival but her heart was not in it.

Jimmy rode on and on. There was a time when riding the open landscape brought him freedom and joy but he didn't want freedom anymore. He didn't want to be running away from anything. He wanted to run toward and not the thing he was heading toward either. He wanted to be running toward Faith. How fitting her name was, he thought. Faith. She had given him back his own. He still wasn't all sure about God but his family was something he could believe in again. He sighed and kept riding hoping that old wounds had healed over the years and he'd find welcoming arms in Rock Creek.

First of all, sorry for the length of this chapter. It sort of got out of hand. I knew the things that needed to be in this chapter and those crazy kids just kept filling in details. Now when I originally came up with the idea for this story, this was where it ended but I recently came to know that I needed to follow Jimmy back to Rock Creek. It's important. So it does not end here.-J