Hey! What's up peeps!
Yes. I am sooo gangsta like that LOL
Yeah, I am aware that this is a little late... But cut me some slack. This baby is ten thousand words long.
And stuff does happen. I swear.
Disclaimer: I own nothing
She was giddy with excitement.
Her face flushed with embarrassment, hands trembling slightly, Jin raised the dress closer to her eye-level, trying to keep the hem she was sewing in a straight line. It was for her Uncle Shirong's eldest daughter, who had tried on her formal robes and recently found it was an inch or so too short. They could probably afford to buy another one for her with a little penny-pinching, but instead the wood-turner handed it to his brother-in-law's wife, claiming she was skilled enough with the needle to perform a flawless job. It was a lie, and everyone knew it. Shan, although very skilled, was far from extraordinary with a needle, and certainly no match for the seamstresses that the man could have hired. It was a charity case, the wealthier man finding a way to give money to his poorer relatives, especially as Hai was beginning work at his wood-turning business in a couple of days. But as Renshu was too proud to accept money straight, and Shirong didn't have the spare money to give his new apprentice a steady wage, giving Shan a few items of clothing to re-hem and darn was the next best option. However, as Chang had came home half an hour ago, an hour after Jin – who received severe rebuking for her inability to come home on time – absolutely plastered in mud, Shan had no choice but to force him into a bath, assigning the work to Jin, who, to be frank, needed to work on her needlework anyway.
Her hands and eyes were on her work, yes, but behind then, Jin's mind was a million miles away. All she could think about was her short excursion with Zuko. The way he smiled, spoke, held her hand, it was all so unreal to her. She'd never encountered such raw honesty in any boy before, and it was a little unnerving. But, more than that, it was exciting, new, and different. Oh, I can't wait to see him tonight... I hope that it goes well. I hope that he hasn't had some sort of strange change of heart... That would be so like him... poor Zuko. Jin was so excited about her date tonight, that she was able to look past a certain... Unpleasant encounter. Cautiously, the girl cast a sidelong glance to her twin, who knelt at the table with a small, sharp knife, and a pile of vegetables that needed peeling and dicing. Aware that, whatever Jin had gotten up to, Jiro was in on it, Shan had admonished them both, extremely severely, setting the both of them tedious chores, with the unpleasant promise of more when they had finished. I just hope she doesn't tell Dad... This isn't what I need right now. How am I going to get out and see Zuko? Just tell my parents I'm going to bed at eight o'clock and sneak out? How? It's so early, they would never buy it! I don't think they'll ever trust me again if they knew that I snuck into the upper ring to see a boy... And then got caught by the Dai Li... It was only a fleeting glimpse, a shout, and a panicked sprint down a few back alleys. They weren't pursued any further, so the four assumed that they were safe. Nevertheless, they kept their noses in the narrowest, most-secluded side-streets they could find.
"Jin, be careful." Another howl came from the metal washtub, but Shan ignored the cry of protest, the coarse bristle brush grating hard against dirt-caked skin. "I don't want to have to unpick everything you've done. Sew that straight and keep your stitches near invisible."
"Sure, Ma." Jin didn't argue. When her mother was in this mood, it was just better to drop things and act as the meek, subdued girl she was supposed to. Shan nodded, and turned her attention to the small figure in the tub, pulling the boys' arm straight outwards, before beginning to vigorously scrub it.
"Ow! Mama, that hurts!" Chang protested, squirming desperately under his mothers hold.
"You should have thought twice about rolling about in the mud then." She said crisply. "Have you learned your lesson this time?"
"Yes! Yes!" The boy howled. "I won't do it again! Please!"
"I haven't finished cleaning you off." Jin hid a smile at the torture. Oh, the wonders of earthbending... It was a definite bonus, having the ability to shake away the dirt as a dog shakes off water. At least, it avoided punishment such as a painful cleaning when she was Chang's age. "When you're finished, you can dry off and-" The woman was cut off by a swift knock on the door. "What?" She straightened up, still clinging to the scrubbing brush and bar of soap. "Who could that be?"
No. Jin shot her brother a sidelong glance. It couldn't be... He shook his head slightly. 'You're just being paranoid.' He mouthed as Shan set down the brush and soap, moving towards the door. 'Calm down.' Jin swallowed, and nodded, returning her gaze to her needlework, but keeping an eye on the door, hands trembling.
"Hello?" Shan opened the door, the three children noticing in an instant the way her profile froze. "H-How may I help you?" She choked out, reeling backwards.
As the two Dai Li walked into the modest living room, Jins' heart dropped like a stone. However, she forced her face to resemble an expression of modest curiosity, clenching her hands tightly to mask the trembling. Near her, Jiro cast his eyes instantly back to the vegetables, mouth as dry as sand.
"Sorry to disturb you at this time, Madam." He had a slick voice, oily and liquid. "But we've had a report about a group of teenagers breaking into the Upper Ring of our fine city."
"Really?" Shan raised an eyebrow, but her jaw was set tight. Those two. "Well, I can assure you that my children have been home all afternoon, doing chores."
"All the same, Madam," In the tub, Chang was shaking. Slowly, Jin set aside the darning, and taking the towel which was warming by the stove, knelt beside the tub with her arms held out, draped in towelling. The little boy buried himself into the comfort of his sisters' arms, trembling violently. Locking her eyes with the pair of Dai Li, Jin wrapped his skinny little frame up tight, gently rubbing soothing circles in his back. "We would like to take the boy and girl for questioning." The knife slipped from Jiro's fingers, clattering loudly to the floor, and Jin tightened her grasp on Chang, trying to control her breathing. Nononono they can't they can't be serious they won't they don't know it's us they can there's no way, oh crap oh crap oh crap...
"Listen to me, I told you my kids have been here all afternoon!" Panic flashed in Shan's eyes. "Jin got home just before one o'clock, Jiro half an hour after. They've been helping out with chores! There's no way the kids you saw were my children!"
"Please, Madam." There was a tight edge to the oily-voiced mans' tone. "Let's not make this unpleasant for anyone-"
"You have no reason to take my children." Her voice shook. All five in the room knew what 'questioning' really meant. She'd be lucky if she ever saw them again, and if she did, their brains most likely would be as addled and sluggish as soup. "Where is your proof that it was them?"
"Please, Madam-"
"Where is your proof that it was them!" She was borderline hysterical, but didn't care. Shrouded in the very real terror that her eldest remaining children would be taken away, Shan took a deep breath, and tried to hold her composure. "Please, you have it all wrong. Do you think they are the only sixteen-year-olds in the entire city?" She reasoned. "I swear, by the spirits, that my children were here all afternoon. It couldn't possibly be them."
"I would like to believe you, Madam, but with their reputation-"
"What reputation?" Jin's eyes stung, and she glanced over at Jiro, who refused to look at her. "They've made a few mistakes. But their records' have been clean for months! They're learned their lessons, they're good children. Well-behaved. I promise. They're not the kids that you're looking for."
"I'm sure you believe very heartily in that, Madam, but-"
"I would be willing to testify in the highest court that my children are innocent." Shan said in a low, even voice. "They're not the teenagers you are looking for." She stepped aside. "Do they look like the boy and girl you saw in the Upper Ring?" She gestured at the pair, who had changed their clothes, Jin braiding her hair. "Any genuine resemblance?"
"I don't know." Jin swallowed. "I wasn't there to see them-"
"Then how do you know?" She protested. "I bet you were told to find every girl and boy around their age with a record and chase them down. Weren't you?"
"Yes, we were." His teeth were gritted. "Madam, I would appreciate it greatly if you spoke with a little more restraint and respect." Shan's eyes widened even further, but she took a long, deep breath, trying to calm herself.
"You're right." She said eventually. "I'm sorry for acting so out of line. But please, listen to me. My children have been here all afternoon. My daughter Jin washed the dirty laundry and hung it out to dry, before working on some clothes that needed mending. My son Jiro repaired the roof of the coal shed, collected water from the nearby pump, and began preparing dinner." She rattled off a list of chores, mostly imaginary. "These aren't the children you're looking for. Please, they're good kids. They work hard." Shan put on her most pleading expression. "If they get something like this on their file, it's going to be much harder for them to work their way up in their workplaces." She swallowed. "I know, after the trouble with my eldest son, you've kept a close eye on our family. But I promise you, my two children are not going to tread such a path. They're excellent, well-behaved citizens."
"Xiao-Sheng," One Dai Li muttered into his partners' ear. "I don't think it's them. Look at the kids. They're just scared. Most are defiant and proud when they're taken. And the mother is serious. Let's just leave. We're wasting time."
"... All right." Xiao-Sheng cleared his throat. "Sorry to disturb you Madam." He gave a short bow. "But, just a heads-up, please make sure that you keep your children under tight wraps. I know they might be good now, but a past record doesn't go away." He eyed the twins carefully, trying to catch any sort of slip, something that could expose their guilt. However, they were as impassive and impervious as stone. His partner was right. It wasn't those kids. "Enjoy your evening." He turned to leave, Shan giving the pair a nod and a low bow herself. As the second Dai Li left, Shan shut the door quietly behind them. Chang was still in Jin's arms, eyes leaking tears. Jiro slowly picked up the knife, hands shaking so hard he didn't trust himself to use it. Shan's hand remained on the door handle for a long time, eyes fixed on the wood panelling. The seconds stretched into minutes, and no one dared to move a muscle, the air in the room tenser than it had been in months.
"I cannot believe the pair of you." Shan slowly turned around, and with a painful stab, the twins saw she had tears in her eyes. "How. How could you do something like this?"
"... We're sorry." Jiro finally whispered, Jin clinging tightly to her youngest brother, nose buried in his hair. "We didn't mean to-"
"Didn't mean to what?" Shan snapped. "Didn't mean to what, Jiro? Get caught? Get found out? You thought that you could go wandering about the Upper Ring and get away with it?"
"Ma, please." Jiro begged. "We're both really really sorry-"
"How could you put our family in jeopardy?" She was crying in her anger, tears rolling freely down slightly lined cheeks. "After what happened to Meng! How could you! How..." Jiro slowly put the knife down, and walked over to his mother, trying to hug her. "No!" She snapped, pushing him away. "Don't, Jiro. Don't... I-I can't even look at you! Either of you!"
"Ma, I'm sorry." He pleaded. "W-We were so stupid, we know. It was a terrible, horrible mistake. A-And we promise, it'll never happen again... We didn't think, we didn't realise that there would be these sorts of implications." Jiro wiped at his eyes. "Please Ma... don't hate us. We're so sorry." Bowed down with guilt, he couldn't look at his mother, feeling sick. He'd never moved her to open tears before. "Ma-"
"Finish making dinner." She muttered abruptly, pushing past the boy. "Jin can help." Jiro closed his eyes as Shan walked out of the room, into the little hallway, the sound of her bedroom door shutting filling the little apartment.
"... Dammit." He sat down heavily, head in his hands. "We messed up Jin."
"No kidding." It was evident from her voice that she was crying. "I'm so sorry, Jiro. This is my fault."
"Maybe, but I'm to blame, too." He murmured. "I shouldn't have gone, either."
"I shouldn't have dragged you into it." Jin gently stroked Changs' damp hair. "But... I didn't know the easy way to get in, and I was scared to get caught."
"Look, what's happened, has happened." He stood up. "We should go talk to her. Say we're sorry and all that."
"Jiro, she doesn't want to see us." The girl argued. "It's pointless to talk to her now."
"Come on." He muttered. "If she's still a mess when Dad gets' home, we're screwed. We have to at least try and cover ourselves."
"Is that all you care about?" She frowned. "Making sure we don't get in trouble with Dad?"
"No, of course not." He sighed. "Look, I feel dead guilty for this, don't worry. Get up."
"Fine." She released her hold on Chang, who wiped his eyes. "Look, sweetie." She smiled at the peaky little face. "Go and get dressed. Jiro and I are gonna talk to Mama, all right?" He nodded slowly. "And... Let's keep this meeting with the Dai Li our little secret. Dad doesn't need to know, does he?" After a pause and a frown, the little boy nodded again. "Good boy." She gave him a brief hug, and let him go. He slid down from her lap, and scampered across the room.
"Poor kid." Jiro commented. "He didn't need to see any of that." Jin just shot her brother a look, before following him down the narrow, dark hallway, pausing outside the door to their parents' bedroom. "Ma?" He knocked gently on the wood. "Ma, you all right?" There was no response. "Ma, we're going to come in, okay?" He said cautiously. Still, there was no reply. Looking worried, Jiro slowly pushed open the door.
She was sitting on the edge of the bed, a scroll of paper in her hands. Both of the children knew what it was in an instant. Her sister Jiaying married an artist, and one year, he'd painted a picture of them all, the week Chang was born, to be exact. It had hung on the wall for a time, the happy, smiling family of seven. Wordlessly, the twins sat beside her, flanking the women, three pairs of eyes drawn to the picture.
"You've lost a lot of weight since then." Jin remarked with a comforting smile, a hand on her mothers' shoulder. Shan didn't respond, her eyes fixed on the figure of the sixteen-year-old boy, standing beside his father.
"Yeah, look at us." He looked at his sister of Shan's bowed head. "We were so tiny then."
"Well, we were twelve." Jin pointed out. "Look at how dorky I am. All skinny and gawky. I was so weird-looking."
"Yeah. So was I." He raised an eyebrow. "You know, Hai now looks just like you back then."
"Hey, that's not nice." She frowned. "I'm not boyish-looking."
"No, I'm saying he's really girly." The twins let out a chuckle, trying so hard to lighten the mood. Shan was silent, staring the image of at her eldest son. "Ma, maybe you shouldn't look at this." He tried to take it gently from her, but her hands held fast. "It's just making you depressed." It was why her father had taken it down, three-and-a-half years ago. Shan had developed a habit of staring at it for ages, then breaking down crying.
"I still think about him." Her voice was strained, barely above a whisper. "Every day. Whether he's still alive or..."
"Okay, that's enough." Jiro said firmly, wrenching the paper from her hands, rolling it up. Jin frowned at his brother, but he ignored it. "I know it's hard, Ma. It's hard on everyone. But we can't sit here and wonder why and what if. He's gone, Ma. Meng is gone. He's not going to come back." He hated himself for saying it, but it was the truth. He knew it, despite the protest, the argument of hope, in the pit of his stomach. Jin glared daggers at him, her arm around her mothers' trembling shoulders. "But you still have us, Jin and I. And Chang. And Hai."
"I almost lost you today." Her lower lip was trembling. "If they'd taken you away..."
"But they didn't." Jiro argued. "Ma, please. Jin and I, we are so, so, sorry. It was a really stupid thing for us to do, and we understand that. Look, can you please just shout at us and punish us or something?"
"... If I lost you two..." She trailed off with a shuddering sigh.
"You won't." Jin said comfortingly. "We're not going anywhere." Jiro slowly replaced the picture in the bedside cabinet, and stood up, hands resting on the windowsill.
"I know you two are growing up, and in a few years, you'll be out on your own, but..." She gave a small smile. "You're still my babies. And you've caused me heaps more trouble and grief then the younger kids, for sure." She rested her hand on Jin's knee. "But I still love the pair of you so much."
"And we love you too." Jiro murmured, staring out into the back yard, which was little more than a dirt patch, sparsely littered with grass. "C'mon. Dinner still has to be cooked and Dad'll be home soon. He'll want to know why you're upset."
"It'll be okay, kids." Shan stood up, wiping at her eyes. "I'll handle things with your father. Just get back to your chores." With a nod, Jin stood up, and Jiro turned away from the window. "I'll be there in a moment."
"Okay." Jiro closed the door behind himself, walking beside his sister in the narrow passage. "She's slipping." He muttered in a low voice. "I know she's trying hard to hide it, but losing Meng is still killing her."
"I know." She murmured. "But what are you gonna go, go under Lake Laogai and try to find him? He's dead to the family. It's the only way to move on."
"But she's not moving on." He argued. "Neither is Dad. You know how he gets sometimes. And I miss him like crazy, too."
"You think I don't?" She shot back. "Do you have any idea how horrible I feel about it? But we can't dwell on it. Look, what happened when Nana Ling and Aunt Lanfen died? When Ting was stillborn? We mourned, and then we moved on. That's what we have to do." Chang was sitting in the lounge, fully dressed on the floor beside the stove. Jin took the comb from the shelf, and sat at the chair the boy rested before.
"Look, it's easy to say that Jin, but we can't." Jiro argued. "It's not like Ting. She was just a baby. We didn't get to know her. And Lanfen and Ling were family, but not our family. They didn't live here under our roof with us. It's different."
"It is different." Jin agreed, starting at the ends of Changs' hair, attacking the tangled locks with a comb. "But it's not because of that. It's because he didn't get to go properly. You heard Ma. She still deludes herself and thinks he's alive. We can't mention him or talk about him, because it's too upsetting."
"You think it would be different if there was an accident, or he got sick?" Jiro knelt down before the vegetables.
"If we had a funeral? Closure? A grave to go and visit? If we could talk about him comfortably? Of course it would. But as it is, we don't have any of that." She started to braid the little boys' hair, starting at the nape of his neck.
"Then let's go and have a funeral for him." He rolled his eyes. "Bury an empty box at the family plot. Come on Jin, what are we supposed to do?"
"Why are you asking me?" She pulled a little at Changs hair, the boy wincing. "Sorry." She gently kissed the top of his head. "Jiro, I don't know." She looked up at her brother. "I honestly don't."
"We can't live like this." He muttered, head in his hands. "It's impossible. You think it would get better with time, but it's not. It's worse."
"Why do you care, you'll be gone by the end of the summer." Jin muttered. "Abandoning us to go and get yourself killed in the military."
"I'm not abandoning you." He argued. "I'm just doing what I have to."
"You're escaping Ba Sing Se." Jin clarified.
"And you're not planning to?" He shot back. "Look, shut up. Ma's gonna be in here soon." She nodded quietly, winding a loose piece of ribbon about the end of Chang's hair. The little boy was staring, quite intently at Jiro, confusion evident. He looked away, refusing to stare his little brother in the eye.
"Heya!" The front door opening made all three jump. On the threshold, Hai frowned, cocking his head to one side. "Sorry, I was with Eri... Hello? What's up?" He looked around at the trio, his frown deepening. "What... Happened? Where's Ma?"
"Ask Jiro." Jin stood up abruptly, the comb clattering to the floor. Barefoot, she fled across the room, pushing her way past Hai. Her thumping footsteps could be heard for a long time as she ran down the rickety staircase, almost losing her footing twice. As she burst into the street, breathing harsh and ragged, she realised with a start the state that she must have been in. With a gulp, Jin wiped at her eyes, and leaned against the side of the narrow, tall house, home to four large families.
I can't put up with this. Normally, it was all right. The family was okay, functioning harmoniously. Life went on uninterrupted and happy for weeks, months, even. But then, the same old problem flared up, as five troubled children and adults struggled to comprehend the loss of their golden boy and cope with the appalling injustice of his arrest. Reckless behaviour, a confrontation, shouting, a breakdown, it was what the family knew all too well. If Jin was lucky enough, when she returned, her mother would put it down to some sort of reaction to Meng and wouldn't punish her too severely. Nobody in the family, immediate or extended, had any sort of psychiatric experience, but even they had a basic understanding of stress disorders and repressed grief.
It's not intentional. She walked slowly, as if she was in a dream. I hardly sit there and consciously put everything down to Meng. I can't blame him for my mistakes. They're my own and I have to take fault for them. No matter how sick it makes me feel, just to think of them. Damn, her hair was falling all about the place again. She pushed it back, staring idly about her, at the ostrich-horses leading carts laden with rather wilted-looking vegetables, the best being reserved for the Middle and Upper Rings, laughing and scampering children, and the young couples walking hand-in-hand. They all seem so happy... She was jealous, and not ashamed to admit it. Most of the citizens, especially the refugees, kept their head down and behaved. It wasn't hard, really. The laws were somewhat flexible. After all, a rat is free to wander the maze – so long as it stays in the maze. Unfortunately for her, it only took a few unpleasant incidents for her entire family to become blacklisted. At least she wasn't known by sight, like a couple of her older friends, all of which had eventually gone missing.
Perhaps I should talk to Zuko. She dared to hope. He might feel similar... Like Ba Sing Se is horrible and he can't stay here... We could...
What am I thinking? She blushed in the street. I wouldn't... Run away with him, would I? I couldn't leave my family. Not yet. And besides, he has a job in the frigging Upper Ring! Why would he leave that for anything? He would be crazy to. And he'd never leave his Uncle, too. Especially not for me. Why would I even think that...
All the same... She turned on her heel, staring back at the front of her home, so similar to every other in the street. But the top floor told a much sadder story, which ran deeper than the familiar anecdotes of poverty. With a sigh, she turned away. I can't leave them. Not now. Zuko was right. They are all I have. And I love them to pieces. I always will... But until we clear this mess once and for all, nothing's ever going to be completely normal... And when is that going to happen?
I'll go and see Lanying. Her older cousin was one of the few people she could confide in, and had grown up closely alongside Meng, being the same age. Aside from the fact that she needed to talk to someone, - and Zuko probably wouldn't have cared to listen – she was also starved. It was approaching evening, after all, and she hadn't eaten since breakfast. Although funds were a little stretched for the fledgling family, having recently given birth to their first child, she would be able to spare a little food for a hungry family member, surely.
She'll lend an ear at least. The girl turned into a narrow side-alley, turning back quickly first, to make sure none of her brothers had followed her.
Try to let her go.
Aang kept his eyes closed, fingers entwined. Thinking of Katara was easy. He remembered her on their last waterbending session, a weave of dusky skin and snowy cloth and twisting snakes of water. She was strong, beautiful, and yet so incredibly gentle and motherly. How can I ever let her go?
All right. He took another breath, trying to clear his head. I can do this. Pure cosmic energy. Aang imagined her floating away, illuminated, becoming one with the cosmos. All right...
A bridge of light. Aang began to tread the path, as cool and as fragile as glass. I can do this. I can do this. It was the most incredible experience in the world. He was one, not just with his physical being, his mind, but also his spirit, embedded in every leaf, every rock, every insect, on the planet. He was in tune with the entire world. At that moment, he was the world.
They can't get away with this! Aang's footsteps stilled on the glass path as an achingly familiar voice flashed through his mind. They can't do this... They can't! With a low cry, the nomad sank to his knees, limbs as heavy and useless as lead. He couldn't think, couldn't move, couldn't see. Aang please. Please don't come for me. He gasped in realisation. Aang had somehow tuned in to her, tapped into her mind and spirit. In that position of intense meditation, when he was reconnecting with his Avatar State, and the world, he could have tuned in to anybody, from Firelord Ozai to a spider-fly. And with a cold wave of shock, he realised why his subconscious had chosen Katara. I'm begging you... Don't walk into Azula's trap.
When he saw the eyes, Aang jumped. They were printed clearly in his minds' eye. Two brilliantly golden eyes, reminiscent of fire, ringed in red paint. The white face was leering over him, a smirk on dark-painted lips. The makeup of the Kyoshi warriors... But he knew those eyes-
"NO!" Aang jerked himself out, as one does from a frightening nightmare. Opposite him, Guru Pathik looked up, eyes wide. "No!" He repeated again, lurching forward.
"Aang, what are you-"
"I have to go." Aang was shaking, his skinny frame covered in a thin sheen of sweat. "I-I... Katara... Something's wrong, I felt it! I saw her."
"Aang, you cannot leave!" The ancient Guru protested in alarm as Aang stood up. "If you do, you cannot access the Avatar State at all!"
"I don't want it without Katara!" He shot back, turning away from the man. "I have to help her!"
"Aang please!"
"You don't understand!" He turned back to Guru Pathik, eyes oddly bright. "I love her! I'm not sitting by while she's in danger! She- She is my world!" With that, Aang fled, leaping down from the tall plateau. Guru Pathik slowly stood up, watching the figure leap gracefully down the mountainside, toes barely touching the earth.
"Foolish boy." He breathed, with disappointment, not contempt. "You have doomed us all in the name of love..." The ancient man gently shook his head with sadness.
"Goodnight Lee, Mr. Mushi."
"Goodnight, Quan." Iroh waved the last of his new employees' goodnight, a wide smile on his face. Zuko gave a half-hearted wave, his eyes fixated on the broomstick, and mind on a pretty young girl with unruly hair.
"So, my nephew!" Iroh gave the teenager a quick jab in the side. "What are your plans for tonight, hm?"
"My plans?" He blinked. "Oh! Uh, I don't exactly know?" Iroh raised an eyebrow. "What, I don't. I haven't exactly thought about it." That was a lie.
"You know, you're very lucky to have found someone as accepting as she is." Iroh arched his back in a stretch, walking to the serving counter. "Does she really know everything?"
"Pretty much, yes." He shrugged, leaning a little on his stationary broom. "I kind of can't believe it either. And apparently, I'm one of the nicest people she's ever met. That part I don't understand."
"I do." Iroh pulled open the drawer where the takings were stored. "You, my nephew, have a very strong sense of honour and respect." Zuko sighed. "Not just for yourself, but others around you. It's hard for girls like Jin to find people who have such respect and honour them."
"Why?" He frowned. "She's a nice girl. Why would anyone want to treat her badly?" Iroh only chuckled, and shook his head, carefully stacking the pile of coins, trying to gauge how much profit they had gleaned on their opening day.
"That's a very good question." The retired General murmured. In reality, he knew the definition of 'badly' in that sense, and he knew why, it was a little obvious. His well-trained eye had quickly spotted the glint in her eye and curl in her smile, traditional flirtatious mannerisms, but thought he would spare his clean-minded nephew. "Would you like your weeks' wages in advance?"
"Hm?" Zuko set down the broom, dispelling any pretence of actual work. "Why?"
"I don't know, maybe so you can buy Jin a nice gift, take her out?" Iroh said patiently, suppressing a desire to smack his borderline idiotic nephew. "I've heard of an excellent place to eat in the Middle Ring, on the same street as the University. It shares a small courtyard with the only school of Ghost Koi in the city. Take her there, it's apparently lovely." It was just so incredibly sad that he had gone this long without the barest female contact. Even in his younger days, before his engagement, Iroh had been prone to harmless flirting, and he'd caught his own son in a somewhat compromising situation once or twice. It was why he encouraged Zuko's budding relationship to this extent; it was something that bore a resemblance to a normal, healthy life, something Zuko deserved, but had been robbed of for a heartbreakingly long time.
"Oh!" Eyes widened in recognition. "Yeah, of course, that would be good." Iroh nodded, and pushed four gold pieces and three silver ones across the table. Zuko froze. "What... Really? Just for this week?"
"I'm the manager Zuko, I decide the wages." Iroh assured his nephew. "And... To be honest..." He gestured at the growing columns of money as Zuko walked towards the counter. "I'm pretty sure that it can be spared."
"Wow, thank you Uncle!" He slipped the money inside his clothing, before giving his Uncle a quick embrace. "That's really generous of you."
"Any time, my nephew." He murmured softly before pulling apart, smiling. "You should probably think of heading off soon, no?"
"Oh, yes." Zuko nodded. "Er... Then, I guess I'll see you later on tonight?" He started to walk out of the shop. "I won't be out too late."
"Uh, Zuko?" Iroh called out, making the teenager pause. "Are you forgetting something?"
"Am I?" Zuko turned around, confused. "What am I forgetting?" An eyebrow raised, Iroh pointed to the apron that the teenager was still wearing. "Oh... Oh!" He pulled it off quickly, shooting his Uncle a glare. "Don't laugh." He threatened the elderly man, setting it down on a table. "I mean it."
"Wouldn't dream of it." Iroh bit back a chuckle, watching the retreating figure of his nephew with a happy smile. "Enjoy yourself tonight, Prince Zuko." He murmured, before turning back to the laden countertop.
I hope she likes this.
Zuko swallowed nervously as he fingered the small wooden box in his pocket, keeping a suspicious eye out. The sun had set half an hour ago, the atmosphere darkening. It was usually all right if you kept to yourself, but Zuko was wearing his finer robes from the Upper Ring, giving the largely inaccurate impression that he was wealthy, and his purse ripe for the taking. On the safe side, he wore his Dao swords, slung at the waist, one hand resting carefully on the hilt. He stood a little far back from the action, although not invisible, he would be hard to pick out. Jin was due to be here very soon, he realised, and she might not be able to see him. With a sigh, Zuko stepped forward, into the light a little more. Arms crossed, he stared idly up at the string of lanterns which ringed a part of the little courtyard. They'd been fixed, and replaced, which surprised the teenager a little. He didn't really think people cared that much, but there you go...
"Lee!" His stomach softened when he saw her. Jin stood at the wide entrance to the courtyard, a wide smile on her face. As she walked towards him, arms held out, he noticed her face in sharper detail. "It's so good to see you!" She embraced him, Zuko holding her for a few moments, before pulling away, his frown deepening. His suspicions were right.
"Why have you been crying?" His hand rested on the side of her face, analyzing her red-rimmed eyes. Jin swallowed hard, and looked away, biting hard on her lower lip. "Jin?" He pressed, lifting her jaw so she had to look at him. "What happened?"
"It's... Nothing, really." She murmured. "Just stupid family stuff. You don't want to hear about it, it's just something that we always-"
"Tell me." He cut over her, the abrupt words causing Jin to blink.
"What?"
"Tell me." He repeated, his hand drifting from her face. He was unsure of what to do with it now, how to lift his hand away without giving the impression he was recoiling from her. Zuko settled for placing his hands lightly on her shoulder. "Look, I've blabbed to you all about my messed up family, tell me about yours."
"They're not messed up!" Jin argued, lips stretching into a weak smile. "Well, not usually, anyways." She let out a soft sigh, and looked down at her feet, clothed in shoes she borrowed from her cousin. "It's just... It only takes one bad thing to happen and screw everything up forever."
"Don't have to tell me." Zuko muttered. Jin looked at him. "No. You were talking." He took her hand, and started to walk. "We have a little while yet... Tell me while we're walking."
"What?" She blinked. "Why? Where are we going?"
"Oh! Well, er, I hope you don't mind, but I was hoping we could maybe go and get something to eat, if that was okay by you."
"Yes! Of course!" She beamed, heart instantly lifted. "Where did you want to go? Back the first place we went to? Or I know a really great place a little south-west of here that do the best baozai. Or did you have something else in mind?"
"Yeah, I did." Zuko nodded. "I got this place in the Middle Ring recommended to me by Uncle... It's apparently really good."
"Oh, okay." Jin nodded slowly. "But... How am I going to get in? I really don't think I should be sneaking around again today."
"You won't have to." Zuko assured her. "I'll get you in, no problem. Don't worry about it." She frowned a little. "Honestly, it will be fine." He said firmly. "Trust me."
"... Okay." She relaxed into a genuine, if small, smile. "I'll trust you on it, then." She gently took his hand, curling her fingers around his, pressing their palms together.
"Good." Zuko smirked. "Now, tell me what it is that's troubling you, Jin. I don't mind listening." At the words, she clouded over, and looked away. "Jin." His tone tightened. "Look, whatever it is, I'm sure my story is much worse. What's wrong?"
"Well, to be honest, I didn't really think that you would care that much." Jin confessed as they walked down the street. "I mean... Look at you. Everything you've been through. I can't even begin to comprehend how that must have felt for you. And to say that I have problems, and that my family's past is complicated, it's just selfish."
"Jin, it's not selfish." Zuko murmured. "Everybody's different. I won't tell you how many hundreds of hours I spent angsting and tormenting myself over everything that's happened. To be honest, a lot of my grief is self-inflicted. I was the one that was weak in adversity."
"Zuko, you're not."
"I was." He contradicted her. "I really, really was. It took my Uncle hours and hours of patiently lecturing until I realised that all I was doing was hurting myself. But I-" He broke off the sentence, shaking his head. "This isn't about me! This is about you." He tightened his grip on her hand. "You told me once before that your family remained whole throughout the war. If it wasn't that, then what was it?" He watched her carefully, the girl raising her eyes to the sky for a moment, examining the emerging stars, before lowering her gaze.
"It didn't need to be the war." She began quietly, scooting a little closer to him so she could keep her voice lowered. "Not when there are enemies of your personal safety and privacy right on your doorstep, ready to pounce."
"The Dai Li." Zuko breathed, watching her nod.
"The Dai Li." She agreed. "I was twelve. It... It was my fault, really. Mine and my brothers'. See, we were right little scamps at the time, always fighting and getting into trouble. Usually, it was just with stallholders and family, but one time, Jiro and I got into a lot more trouble." Jin swallowed hard. "We were bending rocks, stupid kid stuff, hiding on the roof, hitting people, knocking things over. You know, just being little idiots. Thing was, there were a couple of Dai Li patrolling. Jiro hit one of them, it was an accident. Well, he claims it is, but I don't know. Either way, they got really angry and tried to chase us down."
"For throwing a rock?" Zuko raised an eyebrow. "A couple of kids?"
"They're evil." She mumbled. "You know that. They should have let it go. I wish they had. But they didn't. They managed to catch us, just as we reached the place where our older brother Meng hung out with his friends." Jin bit her lip. "I think that they were just going to yell at us and send us on our way, but Jiro freaked out, and started to try and knock them down with rocks."
"They would have loved that." He felt her hand clench, nails digging into his skin rather painfully, but said nothing.
"Yeah. They announced that we were under arrest for antagonising a Dai Li officer. A couple of twelve-year-old kids! That's how horrible they are. They just don't care, about anything." Jin blinked rapidly, vision wobbling. "But... Our brother, he saw everything, and of course he wasn't going to let that sit. He pulled a house down on top of them, and told us to run, that he would take care of everything. So we did. We got out of there, as fast as we could. We waited for a couple of hours, and then went home, hoping it would be safe. It was, we didn't get any Dai Li knocking on our door, but..." She rubbed at her eyes with a free hand.
"Did you see him again?" Zuko asked quietly, his grip almost as solid as hers. Jin sniffed, and shook her head slowly, trying to keep her breathing even.
"Never again. He was gone. A friend of his witnessed everything, he explained to us later that Meng killed one of the Dai Li when he was trying to fend them off, and the surviving agent knocked him out and he was taken away. That's kind of why Ma's told us to not bend in public anymore. She's paranoid, but also a little right. It is dangerous when it goes wrong."
"Oh..." Zuko mumbled, not knowing what to say... "Jin, I'm so sorry..."
"It makes me think he's been executed." She looked at the ground as they walked. "Killing a Dai Li agent would warrant an execution I'm sure, even at sixteen. I hope that's the case, anyway."
"You do?" Zuko was confused. "Why? Why would you wish death on your brother?"
"Because it's the not knowing which is tearing our family to pieces." Jin explained. "To think he could be alive, somewhere, is slowly driving my mother insane. He was her favourite, everyone knew it. He was Dad's favourite too. The golden child of the family. Don't get me wrong Lee, I loved him so much, and I miss him like nothing else. I want him to be alive, more than anything. But, in my heart, I know he's not. I know there's just no way he would have been kept alive by them, not for this long. If I could have anything, it would be to have confirmation that he's dead. Written proof so I can show everyone and my family can finally move on."
"Wouldn't you rather have him here? Have him returned to you?" The teenager frowned. "Sorry, I just don't understand... Not knowing is a blessing, Jin. It give you hope, you could think that they might still be alive, that there might be a chance, no matter how stupid it is, that you'll see them again." He was speaking more personally now, the image of his mother fixed in his mind. "Because your life without them is so horrible, sometimes the only thing that keeps you going is the hope that they might be out there so they can make everything okay again."
"Your Mother." She quietly guessed, watching him nod slowly. "You said she was gone, but not..."
"I don't know." Zuko said. "I hope she's alive, of course. And it still keeps me up a lot of nights, wondering. But I'm not going to let it destroy me. I'm going to look for her, after all of this is over. When I'll be able to ask after her by her real name, not some alias I don't even know."
"... I hope you find her." She said gently. "I really do. No one deserves to lose their mother, not if they're just a kid." Jin sighed. "It messes them up for life. My cousins collapsed after my Aunt Lanfen died, and they're still not the same, eight years on."
"Sometimes, I can't help but wonder what might have happened." He sighed. "If she never left. I definitely wouldn't be here. I'd still be in the palace, with everything intact."
"You'd be evil." Jin wrinkled her nose. "Filled with hate against the Earth Kingdom and wanting to raze Ba Sing Se, sworn enemy of the Avatar and all that. Plus, when the good guys win, you'd kind of either be killed or imprisoned."
"I know, I know." He sighed. "That's what I tell myself, whenever I get homesick, when I think about how, if I was lucky enough and worked at it, I could capture the Avatar, bring him to my father, and have everything restored. I know that's not the right way, I know that it's evil and wrong of me, and my Uncle would be so angry and ashamed if he knew what I thought. I... I don't know why I even still have these stupid fantasies about going back. I'm not the same person I was. I know everything that's happening is wrong, I know my father is a bastard, and nothing will change that. I wouldn't be happy there."
"Exactly." Jin nodded. "That's why you have to be happy here, Lee. I mean, you have to admit, you've got it made. The greatest Uncle I've ever met, a big fancy apartment, a cushy tea-serving job with a, awesome wage..."
"It's not that big." He said modestly, thinking of the massive wealth he used to be heir to. "I mean, it is just a serving job, Uncle has to give me a realistic wage."
"Lee, what I earn per week would keep our household afloat for about a day." She noted. "You daily wage could probably run our family for a month."
"Things in the Upper Ring are a lot more expensive." Zuko pointed out. "You've seen how much Uncle charges for his tea. And by their standards, that's reasonable." He blinked, the conversation on price reminding him of the little box in his pocket with a jolt. "Oh! I can't believe I forgot!" He paused in his walk, disentangling his hands from Jin's. "I should have given this to you earlier... I'm sorry."
"Should have given me what?" She froze as he withdrew the box from his pocket. It was square, about the size of her palm, made from a dark, reddish wood, which she took to be teak. The lid was carved, detailing a single flower, with a long thick stem, sprouting ornately detailed leaves. "Oh Lee." She breathed, taking the box from his hands. "What... Why?"
"I've been a real idiot." He sighed. "You were only trying to be nice, and understanding, and I was a huge prat. Uncle was the one who suggested I give you something, to help say I was sorry, and advanced my wages for the week. Although, I think he just meant some flowers or something... But I saw this in a shop, and I thought that it was really nice, and kind of unique. So that way, you can always keep it, and... I dunno... It might be a little memento or something." With slightly trembling hands, Jin lifted the lid on the box. "If you don't like it, I can take it back and get something else."
"O-Oh my..." Jin's heart seized up as she stared at the gift, lying on a little bed of pale green silk. It was a necklace, a little rectangular pendant a couple of inches long, hanging on a thin gold chain. Made of a beautiful mid-green jade, edged with gold, the pendant bore a dragon, twisting about the minute space, emitting a jet of flame. "Lee..."
"You don't like it." He winced, heart sinking a little. He should have chosen something more conventional, a symbol for peace or luck, or a nice flower. "That's all right. The shopkeeper sounded happy enough to exchange it if I wa-"
"No, Lee, it's beautiful." Her voice shaking, the girl wrapped her arms tightly about his neck, still admiring the jewellery. "I love it." She murmured as she pulled away, her free hand covering her mouth. "I... How could you... You shouldn't have, Lee."
"Well, I'm glad you like it." He lifted the necklace out of the box, releasing the clasp. Jin turned around, lifting her ponytail so Zuko could fasten the piece around her neck. "I was a bit wary about my choosing a dragon... I thought you might have preferred something nicer, like a flower or a symbol."
"From you, Lee, I would have preferred a dragon far more. Flowers are sweet and pretty and I'd never ever say no to a bunch, but... Sort of empty. A gigantic, extinct, fire-breathing monster is way cooler." She turned around, her smile stretching almost from ear to ear. "But... You didn't have to buy me fancy gold jewellery just to apologize again. I know you're sorry."
"Maybe." He shrugged. "But I still wanted to get it. Is there something wrong with wanting to buy you something nice?"
"No, of course not." Her fingertips grazed the jade pendant. "Thank you Lee, so much." The stone, cold against her skin, was slowly warming. "Now, where did was this place you wanted us to go from here?"
"Let's get to the Middle Ring entrance, the one that's a little north-east." He explained. "From there, it's not far."
"Sure." She started to walk, taking his hand. "Let's go." She turned back to look at him. Zuko staring at her, the strange girl, who liked dragons more than flowers, who thought his lineage was interesting, not terrifying. Whose appetite was far bigger than his, but gorgeous, sensual figure refused to show it. Who knew everything, and couldn't have cared less. It was a pure, innocent love of hers, without a fraction of judgement. A warmth that he hadn't felt since his mother.
He broke into a wide smile. "Sure."
Sokka was, admittedly, more than a little nervous.
How long had he dreamed of this day? It was where his mind drifted, when he was curled inside his sleeping bag at the end of a long day, when he dozed at the edge of a campsite where Aang, Katara, and later Toph, practised their bending. It was a fantasy of his, not so secret, that he mentally indulged in, at every opportunity. Ever since he was a little boy, less than four, his father whispering words in his ear as his mother dealt with a fussing Katara. Stories of heroism, of epic battles, forlorn hopes, death-and-glory clashes. Stories of a warrior. Sokka was bred on them, and for as long as he could remember, he fiercely anticipated the day he would finally be able to prove himself to his father, show that he measured up to the heroes of myth and legend, and more importantly, to Hakoda himself.
His father was right, he didn't have to prove himself. Sokka knew this. But it was self-confirmation, more than anything. A form of vanity. He'd fought before, alongside Aang and his sister, and, although he emerged the victor less often than he liked, the experience had to count for something, right?
Slowly, Sokka stood up, enjoying the night spring breeze, salty and gusty from the sea, in his face. Idly, he turned his jawbone blade in his hand, watching as his fellow tribesman ferried back and forth, arms loaded with barrels, rolls of blankets and furs, bundles of poles. Sokka offered to help, but his father advised that he stay back, as he had no idea where everything was packed. So like an eager child, waiting for his parents to pack for a long and exciting journey, he waited. And waited. By the looks of things, however, they were winding up, and getting ready to go.
"Time to head off." Hakoda smiled warmly as he stood beside his son, a hand on the teenagers' shoulder. "Got everything ready?"
"I've been ready for a long time." Sokka looked up at his father with a smile.
"I know you have." The Chief sighed. "Sokka... The battleground is no place for a thirteen-year-old boy. I hardly had a choice."
"I know that Dad." Sokka arched his back in a stretch. "I'm not holding anything against you for that." He turned to regard his father. "I understand." Hakoda smiled again, and opened his mouth to respond, when a shout from Bato made him start, and look up.
"It's Aang!" Bato pointed at the dark shape crossing the sky, which loomed closer, until Sokka made out Aang clearly against the moonlight. "But why..."
"Oh no." Sokka murmured as Appa landed on the beach, groaning as he did so. "Aang, what's going on?" He demanded, rushing towards the bison as Aang leapt gracefully onto the sand. "Why are you so early? What's wr..." He trailed off as he saw Aang's face, his heart plummeting. "Aang?"
"It's Katara." He leaped forward, taking the Water Tribe boy by the wrist. "I was meditating, releasing my final chakra so the cosmic energy could flow – had to surrender earthly attachment. Had to let her go and I tried but I couldn't - s-something happened – I was in her head I was hearing her think-"
"Aang." Sokka pulled his arm free, and rested his hands on the boys' shoulders. Aang was hyperventilating, his words little more than garbled fractions of sentences. "Slow down. What's wrong with Katara? Is she in some kind of trouble?" A few feet behind the boys, Hakoda's heartrate quickened in dread.
"Yes!" Aang blurted out. "She's trapped! Azula has her prisoner. We have to go now."
"Right." Sokka turned to his father, inwardly sick with disappointment. "Dad, I-"
"Go." His jaw was tight, worry for his daughter evident. "Quickly." A quick nod, and Sokka ran towards the bison, grabbing fistfuls of hair as he clambered on his head. Aang leapt easily up beside his friend, taking the reins with shaking hands.
"I hope for her sake you're wrong." Sokka whispered as Appa rose into the air, clinging on to dear life.
"Me too." His voice was trembling. "But... I don't think I am... It was so real Sokka. It was more than a vision. I... I was in her head. I saw Azula. She's got Katara. And it's a trap. She doesn't want us to go and rescue her."
"Well, we're going to, whether she likes it or not." Sokka muttered, feeling more than a little sick. "Aang, we're not expected back for days. And Azula isn't going to anticipate you using weird Avatar powers to get into Katara's head. We've got the upper hand here."
"... Y-Yeah..." Aang gripped the reins, still deeply troubled. "Sokka... There's something else you really need to know."
"Yeah?" He blinked. "What?" Aang looked over at his friend, trying so hard to keep his composure. "... Aang?"
"A-Azula... She was disguised as a Kyoshi warrior." Aang murmured. "That's how they got in to Ba Sing Se... How they were able to get to Katara."
"What?" Sokka's eyes widened. "But... If they're disguised as the Kyoshi warriors, then..." He held his hands over his mouth, a lump of ice in his stomach. "Suki."
"I'm sorry Sokka." Aang breathed, turning his attention back to the moonlit landscape. "I really am. But... We have to focus on Katara right now."
"I-I know." Sokka choked out, feeling as though his chest had caved in. Spirits... How could this have happened? So soon after... First Yue and now...
"We should try and find Toph when we get to the city." Aang spoke up after a long silence. At his side, Sokka was staring intently at the moon, trying to maintain his composure. "Okay?"
"Yeah..." His voice horse, Sokka turned back, craning his neck one more time to catch a final glimpse of his fathers' ships, tiny blackened pinpricks on a brilliantly silver basin of water, before they were swallowed up in the gentle waves. "We're gonna get her Aang. That cow Azula can't get away with this." At his side Aang nodded. "So..." Pushing thoughts of Suki to the back of his mind, Sokka turned to his friend. "Did you manage to control the Avatar State with the Guru or..."
"I had to leave." Aang swallowed. "I couldn't... Not while Katara's in trouble like this... I'll go back, after this is over."
"Sounds like a plan." Sokka slowly leaned against the flying bison, gripping large handfuls of soft white fur.
"Hopefully, I won't need it." Aang's eyes were focused on his hands. "A-According to Guru Pathik, it's locked. U-Until I can open the final chakra."
"We'll be okay." Sokka said resolutely, wincing a little at the cold night air. He sat back up, wrapping an arm loosely about Aang's shoulders. The boy blinked rapidly, taking deep breaths, trying to clear his head.
"You're right." He said softly, his voice almost lost in the air. "Let's just focus on getting there as soon as possible." Aang focused intently on the horizon, jaw set. "If we make good enough time, we might be able to rest for a couple of hours."
But try as he might, Aang just couldn't shake the image of a pair of golden eyes, as sharp and blazing as embers, from his mind.
Argh... If a scene doesn't involve Zuko or Jin, it absolutely refuses to be longer than a few paragraphs X.x Suuuuucks.
All right, so, when will you see more? I am working on rewriting the first chapter at least. I've picked out a few niggling narrative anachronisms, and issues with characterisation that fill me with self-loathing. And I want to get that out within a couple of weeks, ideally before my holidays end, but we shall see. And also, I am working on writing another fic. Not much to say about it, but involves (another) rare pairing, and involves a situation I haven't seen before (but I haven't exactly looked hard haha), so I'm quite excited, and want to work on that too. But this will remain my primary objective. I also have a couple of oneshots that are bursting to get out.
Stupid brain. STOP COMING UP WITH WONDERFUL IDEAS THAT NEED ATTENTION!
Oh well. PLZ to be review? Many thanks.