Title: Into The Fire
Author: miss_peg
Rating: T
Summary: It's been two years since Van Pelt shot Craig O'Laughlin and nothing much has changed, after a difficult start to a new case she finds herself questioning everything until her life unravels and she's forced to make some difficult decisions.
Notes: The final chapter and I didn't really want to write this one, but it's done. The story is over. Thanks to tromana for review all of the chapters and everyone who has read them, let me know what you thought. :)

The soft tone of music played out across the room, Van Pelt slipped her arms gently around Rigsby's waist as his fingers slowly traced the edge of her trousers. She rested her head on his shoulder, breathing in the smells of a long since eaten dinner and the lingering scent of Rigsby's cologne. He swayed his hips, pulling her along with him as they moved to the beat of the song.

It was one of those moments where Van Pelt could have forgotten everything going through her mind; her job prospects, the future she couldn't quite make perfect, the last remnants of feelings come and gone.

The briefest of kisses pulled her away from her thoughts and back into the moment, the perfect moment which she longed to replicate over and over until the world righted itself and she had nothing left to think about. Except for Wayne Rigsby. Van Pelt responded as his lips met hers again, his fingers tugging at the ribbed edge of her sweater until she unleashed every button and allowed him access to her innermost secrets.

Once they'd relaxed into the soft blankets of her bed, her legs wrapped tightly around his skin she let out a long, heavy sigh. She sometimes liked to imagine what it would have been like in the weeks and months that followed Rigsby's son's birth; the skin to skin contact of a little boy sleeping on his fathers' chest. She longed to witness such an intimate moment that eclipsed her own time with Rigsby.

'Not long left,' he said.

'Til what?' she asked, tracing circles across his skin.

'You leave; do you even know where you're going yet?'

The subject had lingered there for longer than she cared to admit, the lack of a solid job offer left her feeling disheartened and fragile. She'd made every effort to source out a new position, had called in favours with everyone she knew to get onto short lists for positions. What worried her was not finding the perfect position, rather, not finding any position. She could barely make her rent as it was what with rising fuel costs and other such expenses.

'Not yet. But I won't be going far,' she assured him, reaching up to kiss him softly on the lips.

'How far are we talking?' he asked, breaking the moment abruptly.

'Couple hours.'

'Oh.'

In the couple of weeks that they'd been together, Van Pelt had said little about her plans for fear of counting her chickens before they'd hatched. Now that she had no clue whether they ever would, she didn't see much point in hiding her intention to stay as close to Sacramento as she could. After all, why should Rigsby suffer when she was the one moving on?

'We could still see each other,' she assured him, straddling him as she stroked his cheek with the back of her hand. 'I can live a bit further from work…and maybe, one day, you could too.'

Rigsby smiled his widest grin and captured her mouth quickly, pulling her from her stable position above him until he'd wrapped himself around her once more.

x

The office felt strange when Van Pelt walked into the bullpen the next morning, despite her lack of job offers the realisation that she had only weeks left made her feel a little sad. The CBI had been good to her, more than good; it had been the best education she could have asked for post-college diploma. She'd met some good people. Despite her woeful feelings, Van Pelt set to work, if she was going to have to wait to live out her dreams, she was going to make every second count.

Around lunchtime, Van Pelt stepped up to Lisbon's office door and gave it a gentle tap, when Lisbon looked up, she pushed open the door and waited a moment.

'Boss, I think I've got something,' she said, a manila file resting on her arm.

'About the Shaw case? Already?' asked Lisbon.

'Erm, no, the Hopkins case.'

Van Pelt reviewed the slip of paper she'd added to the file moments earlier as she avoided Lisbon's gaze.

'The Hopkins case,' Lisbon asked, frowning. 'From a fortnight ago?'

'I know it's a cold case,' said Van Pelt. 'I just couldn't help feel like I had to do something about it. I don't want to leave without closing it.'

Lisbon sighed, her eyes never faltering as she stared at her. Van Pelt lowered her arm and shifted her position. She knew she'd overstepped the mark. Cold cases were cold for a reason, with little evidence there wasn't a lot to go off. She knew that within days of the case being handed to them and yet, when she'd met with the girl's parents, she couldn't help but promise to catch the person that killed their daughter.

'Sit down, Grace.'

'What is it, Boss?' asked Van Pelt, her heart beating a little faster as her hands became clammy. Even after all these years she still felt unnerved when Lisbon looked at her seriously.

'I wanted to ask how you're getting on looking for another job,' she said, her hands clasped in front of her. Van Pelt smiled, her nerves settling quickly. 'Still not found anything?'

'Not yet, I have a few meetings next week.'

'That's great,' said Lisbon, before she paused. 'I've got something I'd like to speak to you about; I have a friend who moved to New York a couple of years ago. She's heading up a new team to do with cyber-crime with the FBI over in Albany. I put your name forward and she wants to meet you.'

Lisbon's words slowly sunk in as Van Pelt repeated them over in her mind. She'd always taken an interest in the computer based aspect of the job, she knew better than most her way around a computer system. Being a younger member of the team meant that her skill was unique, though she'd never considered it to be something she could expand upon.

'In Albany,' she said, her voice trailing off into silence. After everything she'd been through since arriving, California had become her home. She liked the people, the weather and well, Rigsby was there. But there were few job opportunities she would have killed to become a part of. She'd had a friend from the Academy who joined a cyber-crimes unit in the mid-west and now he was flying around the world on a monthly basis. Without meaning to, Van Pelt could feel a bubble of excitement fluttering around inside her stomach.

'I know you were hoping to stay close by, it hasn't escaped my attention that something has been going on between you and Rigsby.'

Van Pelt glanced up quickly, her eyes wide. The very thought of her relationship with Rigsby ruining a chance of a lifetime made her sick to the stomach, this had been the very reason they had broken up before. She couldn't allow either of them to have regrets which made them feel bitter further down the line.

'I'm sorry,' she whispered, but Lisbon didn't look as angry as she had the last time.

'Considering you're leaving soon, I think we can let it slide. This would be a fantastic opportunity for you, Grace; a step in the right direction for your career.'

Naturally, Van Pelt could feel her insecurities fighting with the excitement as she worried about her suitability for the job. Then she repeated Lisbon's words in her mind.

'It would,' she agreed, struggling to forge a smile.

'I have faith in you,' said Lisbon, reaching forward and resting one of her hands on top of Van Pelt's. She frowned in response before allowing herself to smile. 'I'm even willing to allow you an extra couple of days out there in case you're interested and want to look into where is best to move to.'

Van Pelt shook her head, flabbergasted. Then before she could let herself feel any more excited over the prospect, she pulled herself back in. There were no guarantees. 'I don't know what to say,'

'You don't need to say anything,' said Lisbon. 'Consider it a parting gift.'

'Thank you, thank you Teresa.'

'Lisbon.' She raised an eyebrow and Van Pelt reddened.

'Sorry, Lisbon. I didn't mean to,' her voice trailed off, then she spotted the smile on Lisbon's face.

'I'm only your boss for another few weeks.'

x

'Everything alright?' asked Rigsby as Van Pelt returned to the bullpen.

'Sure,' she smiled a brief smile and sat back down at her desk. Rigsby smiled back and returned to work.

The last thing she wanted to do was lie to him, but the thought of sharing her news made her feel a little numb. She would have to tell him eventually, especially if she was offered the position. After all, commuting between California and New York would be impossible. She wasn't ready to have him bring her back down to earth. For now, she just wanted some time to think about what would happen if she was given a position with the FBI.

x

New York was a state that Van Pelt had only visited once; she'd taken a trip to New York City with a couple of her girlfriends just after they'd graduated from college. They'd spent a week in a run-down hotel room with a broken kettle and hairs in the shower. The bliss of being in a city that everyone roamed about, a city she'd only seen in movies or on television had far outweighed the cons that they were faced with. It had been one of the greatest trips of her life. The thought of living a two hour drive away was exhilarating.

She met up with Lisbon's friend, Eleanor McGreevy, first thing after arriving. The flight itself had been tumultuous as Van Pelt had spent the time reading up on various pieces of information she'd printed off the internet. In her distracted state she'd spilt water on the air hostess and ended up with a lap full of pretzels. To say she was ready to meet Agent McGreevy within an hour of arriving in New York would have been a complete overstatement.

'Agent Van Pelt,' McGreevy smiled, shaking her hand abruptly and showing her to a small table.

Van Pelt listened to her as she explained the position, the ins and outs of the job and what would be expected of her. Though McGreevy knew little about the day to day routine of the CBI, she explained what might be different about the Federal Bureau of Investigations and asked plenty of questions that made Van Pelt feel wholly inadequate for the position.

'Does that sound like something you're interested in doing?' asked McGreevy with a small smile.

'Definitely,' said Van Pelt, trying her best to return the gesture.

A dozen or so questions later and Van Pelt was shaking McGreevy's hand once more as they stood by the exit. Van Pelt tried to remember any final questions she had for the woman, beyond the more personal queries about Lisbon's younger years.

'Thank you very much,' said Van Pelt for the fourth time as she slung her purse over her shoulder.

'I'll call you as soon as I can.'

After retreating to a small café a short walk from the FBI headquarters, Van Pelt nursed a latte like her life depended on it. Questions overflowed in her mind until she could barely process each one individually, how soon was, did Rigsby know, would Lisbon, what about Red? She popped a couple of aspirin and took another sip of her latte. The liquid had nearly gone cold, but she finished it off anyway. Then she returned to her motel where she lay on her back staring up at the yellowing ceiling. She'd never wanted anything more in her life, other than to become a cop in the first place.

Her cell phone rang out waking Van Pelt up from a nap; the sky outside was still brightly lit. Without checking who was calling, Van Pelt answered the phone with a yawn.

'Oh, Agent McGreevy,' she muttered, apologising quickly and sitting up on the bed. She listened to every word on the other end of the phone, her heart racing along to the rhythm of her words until there was nothing left to say.

x

The first person Van Pelt saw when she got off the plane was Rigsby; she'd called him up on the cab ride back to her apartment and asked him to meet her there. She couldn't lie to him any longer.

'Do you have a new job?' he asked, grinning down at her as he enveloped her in the biggest of hugs in the middle of her apartment.

'I lied to you,' she replied, pulling away from him. His brow creased and she felt her heart sink. 'I didn't go to Fresno.'

Rigsby scratched his head. 'I did think four days was a long time for somewhere we visit on a monthly basis.'

She tried to smile but emotions had already sought to overwhelm her. His lack of anger at her white lie reminded her how lucky she had been to meet someone as sweet and generous as Wayne Rigsby.

'So where did you go?'

'Albany.'

'Albany, California, or Albany, New York?'

A silence followed, Van Pelt could barely open her mouth to speak, let alone answer him.

'It's New York, isn't it?'

Van Pelt nodded as Rigsby's head lowered.

They both knew why she had chosen to tell him the truth; she'd never been very good at lying to him after all.

'She called me up an hour after the interview,' Van Pelt explained. 'She wants me on her team.'

'So where does this leave us?' asked Rigsby, sitting down on her couch. She lowered herself down beside him and took his hand.

'If there was a way that I could have everything I want, it would be me and you in Albany making a life for ourselves.'

Rigsby's smile barely reached the corners of his lips let alone his eyes. 'I could move, for you.'

'No,' Van Pelt shook her head. They'd been over the same subject time and again, this time their lives were very different and she couldn't pretend otherwise. 'I can't let you do that to your life with Ben. I won't let you be a part time father when I know you want to be there all the time.'

'Maybe I could talk to Sarah,' he tried, but as his words trailed off into the silence, they both knew that nothing could change the way the conversation would end.

'I guess we're just not meant to be,' said sighed, cupping his cheeks with both hands.

She reached forward and kissed him softly until he reacted. A sense of anger, hope, realisation and love pushed them through as they unbuttoned, unzipped and ripped each other's clothes from their bodies. An insatiable lust guided them to the floor, to the line of touch crossing over their skin followed by kisses and the thrust of their bodies against each other.

When all was said and done, Rigsby left the apartment and Van Pelt lay on her couch staring up at the ceiling. She longed for a simpler time where money and ambition mattered little and the desire to meet the love of her life won out over everything else.

x

As she wrapped up her final day with the CBI, Van Pelt could feel herself growing lighter. Her life there had been so tangled up with everyone else's that it felt like someone had cut the strings on her mannequin self. No longer would she need to grow tired with Jane's inability to open up about his feelings, or frustrated whenever Jane and Lisbon failed recognise their obvious sexual tension. Cho's stoic expressions wouldn't confuse her and the desire to forget about her feelings for Rigsby would never need to consume her again. All of that aside, and she felt sad at the departure. She'd grown up a lot inside those four walls; she'd loved and lost, she'd become a better agent and she'd met the most amazing friends she could ever wish for.

But time moved on and so would she.

When she entered the bullpen for the last time, she smiled at her work colleagues as they gathered around her with a cake and glasses of champagne. She shook hands with Lisbon and Cho, gave Jane the biggest hug and even shared one final kiss with Rigsby. She expected she'd see them again one day, but for now, she would make new friends, find new loves and hope that her life would be better for the time she spent at the CBI.

THE END