Jimmy's heart beat faster and faster as he drew closer to the house. It hadn't been very long since the women had taken Faith inside. Something could be wrong. If everything was fine, it seemed Jenny would have said that. Something must be wrong. He didn't think he could bear going in. Something could be wrong with the baby or Faith or both of them. What would he even do without them? There was just no possible way he could go on if they weren't in his life.
He turned the knob on the front door with his heart in his throat and walked in. Rachel was standing there and wrapped him into a big hug. Then she pushed him toward the bedroom without a word. Dread overtook him more with every step and he paused outside the bedroom and heard humming. Faith was humming. It was the same Beethoven tune that she hummed that night at the pond. He dared to step inside and saw Faith was cradling a bundle close to her. Tears were running down her face as she rocked gently back and forth and continued to hum that old tune.
It wasn't until he sat on the edge of the bed that she looked at him but she didn't stop rocking or humming.
"What's wrong, Faith?" he asked not being able to bear her tears any longer. Whatever was wrong with the child they would face it together. She would never again face heartache alone.
She bent down and kissed the babe's forehead and Jimmy craned his neck to see if he could figure what was wrong, what had her so upset. These weren't just tears of joy though he thought maybe they were part of it.
"What's wrong with the baby?"
"Nothing's wrong, really," she said through a sniffle, "I thought I could give you a son."
Her voice was so sad and Jimmy figured out right then.
"A girl?" he asked in wonder, "I have a daughter? Can I see her?"
Faith looked up doubtfully but the huge smile across his face told her that her worries had maybe been unfounded. She shifted the bundle to rest on her lap and lifted the blanket partially obscuring the girl's face.
"She's so beautiful," Jimmy whispered, "She's really ours?"
"All ours," Faith confirmed.
Jimmy dared to reach out and trail a finger across the child's soft skin. He hadn't been around babies a great deal and never around a newly born one. He was actually afraid he would break her. She was so tiny.
"She's so small," he said as the enormity of his responsibility hit. For as small as she was, protecting her seemed such a huge task. "Is she supposed to be that small?"
"I think she's a little bigger than Adam was when he was born," Faith replied, "Would you like to hold her?"
"I don't know how. I don't want to hurt her."
"I'll teach you," she smiled at him and went about showing him how to hold his arms so that the baby might be placed there.
Jimmy still wasn't sold on being able to handle this tiny bundle being placed in his arms but once she was there and looked up at him with her wide eyes he knew he never wanted to put her down. He thought that if he could hold her forever that maybe then he could keep her safe.
"Thank you," he said raising his eyes to Faith.
"You were part of this too," she reminded him.
"I think I had the easiest part."
Faith allowed a small giggle at that.
"We probably ought to name her," she noted.
Jimmy looked at the tiny face looking back at him. The child's brow furrowed as if she was thinking on something real hard and then relaxed. There was something about her eyes. They challenged him in a way he wouldn't have thought such a new life could. They were like Faith's and a little like…
"Emma," he said softly, "Could we name her Emma?"
"That's beautiful," Faith told him, "Emma Hope, perhaps?"
"I like that," he agreed, "I like that an awful lot."
"Emma Hope Hickok," Faith declared beaming, "I think you should take her out to meet the others. Rachel, Lou and Jenny met her but weren't formally introduced. And I think there's a couple gentlemen who need to make her acquaintance."
Jimmy stood uncertainly. Holding her while sitting on the bed next to Faith was one thing but standing and walking and being in a different room was another. He wouldn't have Faith to help him. He looked to see her giving him a reassuring smile.
Jimmy walked into the front room to see everyone there except for Kid and his children. He had taken them home and was probably even getting them ready for bed by now. So Jimmy walked first to where Teaspoon was sitting and held the child out to the older man.
"It's a girl," he said only barely holding his tears at bay, "We named her Emma, Emma Hope."
Teaspoon's eyes were moist as he took the child from her father. While he was over the moon to have another 'grandchild' to spoil—he loved Jamie and Mary more than he thought possible to love another being—it was less about little Emma in his arms than the man who had just handed her off. Jimmy had been his greatest worry after Buck. He knew Cody would be fine and he knew Kid and Lou would take care of each other. He had often worried Buck would never understand that he did indeed fit in somewhere. But Jimmy closed himself off to so much. He never lamented not fitting in because he didn't let himself even want to fit in. Teaspoon had worried for the day he'd get the news of Jimmy's untimely passing and more than once thought that when Jimmy had ridden out with that Burke woman that it would be the last time he ever saw the boy. To have him stroll into town like he had those months ago was an answer to prayers Teaspoon had stopped daring to pray. To have Jimmy home was one thing but then to have Faith come here as well and complete this family for Jimmy was more than he could have dared to wish for this young man who had been one of his children as surely as if he'd actually fathered him. He sat there honored to be the first handed the child and spared a look at her but then could not pull his eyes away. He had seen newly born babes before and usually they weren't much to look at really. This girl was lovely. She had fine light brown hair, just enough to lightly cover her scalp but it was her face that held his attention. Her skin was not the mottled and uneven skin he usually saw when they were first born. It was like fresh cream and the tiny spots of a reddish cast were really more pink and just over her perfect round cheeks. Her tiny rose colored lips looked as if they'd been tied in a bow. Her eyes were wide and wondering at everything around her but she had such an air of inner peace so unlike a new child. She seemed to merely observe as if she was just collecting information and would let them all know what she thought about it later.
"She's beautiful, Jimmy," the old man choked out.
"I know," Jimmy beamed, "I ain't quite sure how I managed any part of making something that perfect."
"Jimmy, let me open my eyes," Faith laughed as Jimmy led her through the house toward the front door. "I'm not coordinated as it is."
"I ain't going to let you run into anything," he assured her with a big smile on his face. He had been waiting for this moment for a couple of days. Faith had been in bed all that time recovering from bringing little Emma into the world but now she was ready to be up and around so once she had fed Emma and gotten her to sleep for a nap, Jimmy had told her to close her eyes so he could give her the wedding present she didn't get on her wedding day.
"I didn't get you a wedding present at all," Faith had lamented but Jimmy had assured her that the tiny girl in the cradle was all the present he would ever have wanted.
"We're nearly there, sweetheart," he said opening the door and pulling her through, "Just step over the threshold here."
"Can I look yet?"
Jimmy turned her to face the end of the porch.
"Okay, you can look."
Faith opened her eyes to see a swing hanging from the ceiling of the porch.
"You made this for me?" she asked in disbelief.
"Actually I made it for us," he said, "Come here and sit a while with me."
He had put a cushion on the seat for her since he knew she was still sore and they sat and rocked for a while until they heard Emma start to fuss. Faith popped up to run and get her but Jimmy stopped her just before the doorway.
"We missed something on our wedding day if you recall," he told her as he lifted her into his arms and carried her across the threshold. He set her gently down and kissed her lightly. "That's better. I guess one of us should go see what she wants."
"Probably changing," Faith said and went off to do just that.
As she stirred the pot on the stove, Faith tried to make sense of the nearly year since she had first met Jimmy. Well, she recalled, she didn't think she was meeting Jimmy at all. She thought she had met Wild Bill Hickok. She involuntarily giggled at the thought that she was now Mrs. Hickok. When she had sent the letter to Patience telling her of the wedding and little Emmy's birth she imagined she could hear the scream clear to Rock Creek. The only benefit had been that her sister had for the most part refused to write to her since then so she had fewer of those rotten and mean letters to look for but then it had only been two months since she'd married and had the baby.
So much had happened in just under a year and her mind whirled with the wonder of it all. Things had gotten to feeling normal for the most part. Jimmy had been working hard and had decided that he knew more about farming than ranching so the preparations were underway to make that happen. They both worked hard and slowly the place was coming together. Emmy was hardly fussy unless she needed something and Jamie had not exaggerated his uncle's skill at rocking a baby to sleep. In fact, she knew that was probably what he was doing as she finished preparing their supper.
She walked toward the bedroom but stood in the doorway and just watched father with daughter.
"Hey there, Emmy," he cooed at her, "Mama says you been good today. I told you she was nice. Bet you feel bad about kicking at her so much. You probably still want to kick me." He took a breath and kissed the child's forehead. "So I guess I ought to give you a story. I know I usually tell you about when I rode for the Pony Express and the characters I met there. Hard to believe those same crazy young people turned out to be me and your uncles…and your aunt. I think today I'll tell you about the best day of my life. I didn't think it was going to be such a great day. None of them were for me back then. I was lonely and I had really lost my way. But you should know that losing your way ain't the end of a story. You can always find it again if you want and sometimes you can even find someone to help lead you back. Well, that's what happened to me. I was up early with a headache and feeling pretty low when I spotted the most beautiful thing I had ever seen to that point. It was a woman with long brown hair and the sun was picking up all the colors in it. And there was something in her eyes that I just felt drawn to. I went over and offered to help her with her things and at first she didn't want to let me. People thought I was something scary back then. Guess you'd find that laughable to see me now but it's the truth. I swear. I somehow convinced her I wasn't going to hurt her and eventually I got that woman to fall in love with me. I tell you it's the best day of my life because that woman was your mama and she changed my life in every way possible. She brought me home to a family I thought I'd lost and she gave me you. I told you that losing your way ain't the end of the story. I guess for me it was the beginning."
He took a breath and blinked back the moisture in his eyes that came every time he thought of the gifts Faith had brought to his life.
"Sleep tight now, Emmy," he said as he stood and placed her gently in the cradle. He brushed his hand gently over her head one last time before straightening up and turning to leave. The sight of Faith in the doorway made him stop in his tracks.
"It was the best day of my life too," she said and then blinked and swallowed the emotion away. "Come on now before your supper gets cold."
"That cake looks delicious, Faith," Rachel said admiring the confection as Faith set it out on the table.
"Thanks Rachel. Do you think I made enough food for everyone?"
"I think you and Jimmy will be eating leftovers for a week," Rachel laughed.
"Well, Cody's coming and Jimmy always talks about his appetite and Lou said Jamie's getting ready to hit a growth spurt…"
"There will be plenty," Rachel assured her.
"I never threw a birthday party for Adam," Faith said sadly. "We didn't have many friends. I was going to on his next birthday since he was in school and had some friends there who might want to come. He was so excited."
Rachel hugged Faith around the shoulders.
"You don't just have friends now, you have family. This will be the best first birthday party any little girl has ever had."
The guests rolled in after that. Teaspoon came later than Rachel even though she was his wife by then. He had wanted to check on things in town before heading to the party. Kid and Lou showed up with Jamie and Mary who had skipped walking and went straight to running in an effort to keep up with her brother. Cody did come and Faith was terribly nervous to meet him even though Jimmy kept assuring her there was no need.
"Faith, I want you to meet one of my best friends, Bill Cody," Jimmy said by way of introduction, "And Cody this is my wife, Faith."
"So glad you could come, Mr. Cody," Faith said earning a hearty laugh from the blond mustachioed man before her.
"Please, just Cody or Billy or Bill," he told her, "We don't stand on ceremony too much here." He then turned his attention to Jimmy. "I couldn't believe it when I heard you was getting married and had a baby besides. Now that I see the lovely creature you married, I believe it even less."
Jimmy laughed heartily while Faith blushed at the compliment.
"I caught this one heading toward the cake with her little fingers just itching to get into it," Lou said walking up to Faith and handing Emmy over to her.
"And this," Jimmy said reaching out to hold his daughter's hand as she leaned into her mother's shoulder, "Is Emma Hope Hickok. We call her Emmy."
"Pleased to meet you, Emmy," Cody said as he patted her head. She looked to fuss or be frightened but then giggled.
"Cody was always good with children," Jimmy joked, "He's just a big one himself."
"Oh look, Buck and Jenny are here with Sally!" Faith nearly shouted. She and Jenny had become even closer friends since their daughters were mere months apart though they also spent a good deal of time with Lou and Mary. Jamie had started school so Lou welcomed the company and the chance for all of their daughters to become friends.
"Sorry we're late," Jenny laughed, "We were busy cleaning strained peas off the walls. Someone did not appreciate her food."
"I bet she'll appreciate that chocolate cake over there," Cody interjected, "Buck, it's good to see you."
Cody first stuck his hand out but the handshake quickly became a hug.
"I can't believe the two of you finally saw the merits of family life," Cody declared, "I honestly never thought you would. It's a good look for both of you."
There was a commotion and Cody looked up smiling.
"I know this is a birthday party and I'm not trying to take anything away from the guest of honor but if I recall the story this is also your anniversary," he explained, "I thought I'd bring a surprise as kind of an anniversary present."
Jimmy strained his eyes and then blinked, not believing them. He was sure he recognized the man helping the red-haired woman off of the buckboard but then it couldn't be. The sight of one little girl bounding down with her sand colored ringlets bouncing and then a smaller girl with a head full of ginger curls being lifted into the arms of the woman confirmed it for him. He was rooted to the spot as he watched her walk across the yard to him and hand the toddler off to the man.
"Jimmy Hickok," she said looking him up and down, "If you aren't a sight for sore eyes. Looks like married life agrees with you. I'm not often one to say I told you so but I feel pretty good about this. I told you so."
It was only then she allowed a smile across her previously stoic face. Her dark brown eyes danced as he remembered they did when she allowed a smile.
"It's good to see you, Emma," he told her pulling her into a hug, "I can't tell you how good. I guess I should introduce-"
"Faith," Emma finished for him extracting herself from the embrace, "I remember her name from your letters."
Emma neared Faith and placed a hand on either side of Faith's face and then smiled warmly before wrapping her arms around her.
"Thank you," she whispered, "Thank you for saving my boy."
"I'm pretty sure he saved me," Faith answered.
The rest of the party went better than Faith could have dreamed. There was laughter and merriment and it was everything she ever hoped a child of hers could grow up knowing. Jimmy and Sam sat a while talking about how completely Jimmy had walked away from being a lawman and Faith thought Sam might have tried to convince Jimmy to go back to it but he still pushed it away 'for now' as he always said. Faith now thought less and less that he missed that life. Sam did mention that it was nice not to fear seeing Jimmy's face on a wanted poster. Emma's girls were delightful and the older one, Betsy, could not get enough of Emmy and Sally. Faith smiled as she sat on the porch swing remembering the look on Emma's face when she saw her namesake. Emmy took to Emma quickly as if she knew the things they shared and maybe she did at that. Sitting there in the darkness and staring out at the stars Faith felt peace she once thought she would never be allowed. She had all she had ever wished for and she could feel secure with it now. Jimmy had made good on his promise to make her take his love as a given. She could never doubt it and would never again. Aaron was a distant memory of another life and most of the time she was even at peace with Adam being gone. She knew he was well taken care of. Jamie was right, she had concluded, Noah and Ike would have somehow found him and looked after him for her.
Faith looked up as Jimmy walked out on the porch.
"I thought she would never get to sleep," he said looking tired but happy all the same.
"I told you I'd put her down tonight if you wanted."
"You know I love spending that time with her," he replied shaking his head, "Besides, you worked so hard getting this day together, it was the least I could do."
He sat down next to her on the swing, looping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her tighter to him.
"What were you thinking about all alone in the dark?"
"How I'm not alone anymore," she said smiling at him, "How I never will be again."
Jimmy leaned and kissed her and was surprised when she took control of the kiss and then more surprised when her hand started running up and down the insides of his thighs. They had resumed their romantic life in every respect after Faith recovered from giving birth and it had become even more active since Emmy had been moved into her own room but he really thought she'd just be tuckered out from the day. He was pleased to know she wasn't.
"Would you like your anniversary gift now?" she whispered in his ear.
"I thought you'd never ask," he replied lifting her into his arms and maneuvering her into the house, "I hope you're not disappointed but I got you the very same thing."
Faith giggled and then leaned close to his ear again.
"I'm never disappointed," she said, "And I have something to tell you. I guess it's part of your present too."
He placed her gently on their bed and looked at her seriously.
"What is it? What do you need to tell me?"
"The doctors were wrong."
She said it as if it made all the sense in the world and cleared anything up at all but Jimmy sat there confused and wondering what doctors and what she meant and why she looked so happy.
"Doctors?"
"The ones who said I couldn't have children."
"I knew that," he told her, "I just put the proof of that to bed."
Faith just smiled at him and he knew he still wasn't getting it but then it dawned on him.
"You mean? We're? Really?"
She just nodded and smiled with tears welling up in her eyes.
"Now that is something worth celebrating," he said as he bent and kissed her deeply.
Yes, dear readers, this is the end. Until I decide there needs to be a sequel. Not sure about that. But I think I left them in a good place. I wasn't expecting Cody or Emma to make an appearance but they just wanted to come to the party so badly. And I speak from experience when I say that a daughter is the best wedding present you can get. Faith did well on that one. I hope this wrapped things up well enough for you all. This story strayed so far from its humble beginnings but I think I feel good about it all the same. I cannot thank enough the ladies of the plus for their unending support for me. Not only with this story but all of them. Some days I think I might just throw in the towel if not for them. So Kristina, Anita, Rosie, Vandy, Marie, Mercy, Fran, Lisa and anyone else I am neglecting...Thank you! I love you all! And I love all who read this as well.-J