Chapter 4

DPOV

I realized that Lissa didn't want to be followed to her room or wherever it was she was going, so I headed to my own room instead. I tried to lay down for a bit and close my eyes, but sleep would not come, not matter how hard I tried. All I could think about was Rose. She looked so broken and would not let me make it all better like I did before. The emotional pain was so bad that it was starting to cause physical pain. There has to be a way to tell her everything I feel for her. I tore through my room looking for what I needed. I finally found the two simple things I was on the hunt for…a pen and a notebook. I looked around my room to survey the damage I had done. I let out a small laugh as I realized that it looked like Rose's room used to. I didn't care right now though. I had to get everything out on paper before it overtook me. Before long, I had quite a bit written:

My Dearest Roza,

Words cannot begin to explain how sorry I am for putting you through everything that you had to endure. If only you would allow me to make it up to you. I promise I would never, never hurt you again. I would make you happier than you could even imagine. I long to hold you I my arms and to kiss and hold you until you don't want me anymore. If you would only take me back, I could prove to you exactly how much I love you. I will do things perfectly to ensure you that I love you and only you and that you are the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. I would get down on one knee under the stars on a clear night and ask for your hand in marriage. After you walked down the isle, I would say the words to make a solemn vow to love you and cherish you forever. As I sit here now, I can hear the exact words I would say to you. Just please give me another chance to show you I love you. We don't have to worry about hiding it anymore. I love you. Please let me show you. Please say you'll take me back and forgive me. Please be mine once again.

Forever yours,

Dimitri

Just as I was finishing the letter, I heard Lissa yelling for me outside. I opened the door and let her in. "Rose has requested I see her. I was wondering if you wanted to come along." I deliberated for a moment and shook my head. "No, me being there before only upset her. I do, however, have something I would like you to give to her." I folded the letter and handed it to Lissa to give Rose. With that, the words from my heart left the room with Lissa. I just hope that Rose finds it in her to take me back. I meant every single word I had written and more.

RPOV

After what seemed forever, Lissa finally made it. We talked a lot about what has been going on at court. Apparently, nobody has appointed a new queen yet and nobody has seen or heard from Adrian since "the discovery". My mother arrived in court a few hours ago, but hasn't been to see me yet…thank God! I don't think I could handle facing her, knowing that what I had to tell her would result in death – be it mine or Dimitri's…if not both. I am just hoping that Abe gives me the time to sort things out and tell everyone without taking it upon himself. Which brought us to another topic…telling Dimitri. When we started talking about him, Lissa handed me a letter and excused herself from the cell. She said that she would just be down the hall. I opened it, and when I read the greeting, I knew exactly who it was from. I read the letter twice. By the end, I was in tears. Lissa must have heard me and had come running in, embracing me in her arms. She let me cry until I couldn't any longer. Mikhail had come on guard during my emotional breakdown and I could feel Lissa shake her head as if to tell him that now was not the time. "Are you alright now Rose?" I nodded. "Liss, what am I going to do? I love him with all my heart, but I can't help but hear the resounding echo in my head. "Love Fades. Mine Has." What should I do Liss?" She sat me up and looking me straight in the eye, she said something that shocked the hell out of me. "Get your fucking head out of your damn ass and take him back already!"

"Excuse me, Princess? Do you kiss your man with that mouth? Where the fuck did you learn to talk like a damn fucking sailor. Oh…nevermind. But seriously, take him back? I don't know." She let out a disgruntled sigh. "Rose, he never stopped loving you. He thought that you would become a better guardian than even he was or is and that if you two were together, it would just hold you back. Dimitri and I have been talking about it all for quite some time now. I convinced him to fess up to his true feelings…now it is your turn. Give it another chance. He loves you and you love him, so there should be no question about it. Take him back now! Think of it this way…you take him back but tell him about the baby and then let him decide where to go from there. If he chooses to stay, there you go. And I know that you can tell when he is either lying or hiding something, so you can use that as well."

Maybe I can delude myself into thinking that it would all be that easy. Then again, it does make sense and it meets one of Abe's deadlines. "Thanks Lissa. I think I need to talk to Dimitri. Would you mind getting him? I need to get this over with and get on with my life. I'll have you sent for after a while to let you know how it all went." She nodded and Mikhail let her out of my cell. As I heard her walking away, I yelled, "Chocolate donuts would help!" I heard her and Mikhail both laugh as her footsteps sped up and faded away.

"Rose, did anyone tell you what happened?" I gave Mikhail an odd look as if to tell him that nobody has said anything at all about anything. "What's going on?" He looked at me as if I were insane. "Ambrose killed himself! He probably was depressed without Tatiana and couldn't take it anymore. But hey, someone found this in his room…it is addressed to you." With that, he handed me an envelope. What is with people and letters today? Huh.

Rose,

I am sorry that I did this to you. Tatiana was becoming out of control with what she was doing to the dhampir race. I know that the latest decision of hers didn't directly affect you, but really…16 is too young to graduate. I also knew that she was going to find someone else to be the Princess's guardian and was going to send you away…making it look like you ran away again. There were a lot of other things that she was planning that weren't right. I had to do something. She wouldn't listen to me when I tried to reason with her. I had gone to your room to talk to you, but you weren't there. I had just come from talking with Tatiana and I was upset. I saw your stake and grabbed it. I killed the queen. I am so sorry. I know that now you will be free and in a way, now I will too. Goodbye Rose, it was very nice meeting you. Have a great life with Guardian Belikov and congratulations.

See you on the other side,

Ambrose