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not beta'd

storyline - Crystal beachin'/Heart

prompt - league

"What?" Bella screeched, trying to turn around in the tight space of the backseat so she could see Edward. "A gun?"

But Edward simply rolled down the window while Jasper handed over a Super Soaker 50, calmly pumping it a few times in the process.

Outside, Jake's eyes widened. He held his hands up in self defense, but Edward was merciless. He shoved Bella on to Jasper and Alice, and then let loose a spray of water on the Douche Pack, making sure to focus on faces and crotches.

His Glock might have looked innocent with its primary color scheme, but the force was strong with it.

"Eff you, Cullen!" Jake snarled, peeling out of the parking lot.

Emmett returned to the Jeep, his steps faltering. "What the hell was that?" His eyes fell to the backseat. "Did you unleash the Glock on Jake?"

"Sure did," Edward said smugly, dropping his pretend piece to the floor. He reached for Bella and pulled her back on to his lap.

Bella, however, was not that impressed by Edward's show of manhood. While she'd definitely been disgusted by "Jake's" leer and disgusting gesture, she'd felt that Edward's response was more for his benefit than hers. She was glad the ordeal was over.

Emmett rolled his eyes and got back in to the driver's seat, handing the grocery bag to Rose. "Let's get out of here before we run in to anyone else."

Carlisle and Esme Cullen lived in a huge beach house at the end of town. Apparently, Edward's family was originally from California, but had often spent summers in Destin. When Edward graduated high school, his parents took the opportunity to move east, where they'd built a home and started a thriving construction business.

Meanwhile, Edward had plans to be a doctor –he would be continuing his pre-med education in the fall, back in LA, but he and his friends were in Destin until late August.

"So you guys have always lived near the ocean," Bella mused, staring up at the lovely house as they got out of the Jeep.

Edward grabbed her hand. "Yep. Always."

Esme answered the door with a beatific smile. She had the largest breasts and the whitest teeth Bella had ever seen. She was perfect like… Barbie's mom.

"Hey, Mom." Edward planted a kiss on her cheek. "This is Bella."

Esme turned her mega-watt grin on Bella. "Welcome to our humble abode. You and Edward are welcome to come anytime…and to stay anytime. I know there's not much room in that dingy little apartment the boys insist on staying in and honestly, you can't romance a girl in a bed you share with –"

"Hello, boys," Carlisle boomed, tucking Esme in to his side. "Ladies, welcome to our home." He stuck his hand out to Bella, who was still blushing from Esme's rather enthusiastic overtures about her son's sex life.

"H-hi," Bella said, shaking the older man's hand. Hot damn, he was a fine specimen. Almost even sexier than Edward.

After the flurry of introductions and small talk had died down, the Cullens led their guests further in to the house.

Bella felt a little out of her league. This place was not only huge, it was classy.

Alice liked the energy of the house. It was spacious and open, yet cozy and familial. She sensed nothing but good vibes, and sidled up to Esme to ask her if she engaged in yoga here.

Rose liked the place well enough, but she was more interested in possible areas she and Emmett could sneak away to later. They'd need to satisfy their sexual appetites once they'd taken care of their bellies.

After a lovely dinner of lobster, roasted new potatoes, fresh greens and Esme's special mojitos, the group convened out by the pool to enjoy the massive hot tub. Nestled in to the deck, it overlooked the ocean, which at the moment featured a brilliant setting sun.

Bella was initially a bit awkward at the thought of disrobing in front of Edward's parents. After all, she was in a tinier bikini than usual.

But then Carlisle and Esme started making out. Like, tongues were visible. The boys ignored it at first. Bella, Rose and Alice went from uncomfortable to amused to slightly grossed out at the display, and after awhile even Edward looked annoyed.

He splashed his parents. "Why don't you head up to the hot tub upstairs?"

They said a hurried goodnight and practically ran off, stopping only to wrap themselves in towels before disappearing inside.

"Wow," Alice said. "It's nice to see a couple that's so… healthy with their affections."

Jasper snorted. "You mean horny as hell? Yeah."

"I'm surprised you're an only child," teased Rose, flicking water at Edward.

"I'm the youngest of six," he sighed, tugging Bella back on to his lap.

"Holy canoli!" Bella cried. "For serious? I'm an only child." She secretly hoped she'd look half as good as Esme after childbearing.

Emmett passed around one of the bottles of wine he'd bought earlier, and before long everyone was nice and toasty.

"Game time," Rose said, finishing off the bottle.

"Grrrreat," groaned Bella. She always sucked at these stupid games, especially the oversexed ones Rose favored.

"Oh shush, Sister Bella," Rose said. "Okay. Truth or Dare. I'll go first."

Under the water, Edward adjusted himself. Bella felt him do so and wiggled further back, making things harder for him.

"You better stop or I'll dare you to do something," he whispered into her ear.

"Bring it," she whispered back, snazzy with liquid courage.

"Oh, it's been broughted," he whispered with an upward thrust.