Okay, I'm sorry this chapter is really short but I'm pretty sure my next one is gonna be really long so it'll work out. I'll start typing it up tonight but probs won't finish it until tomorrow evening. Then I'm planning on chapter nineteen (if everything comes out like I plan, which sometimes stuff changes in the heat of the writing moment) being in Zack's PoV. I have a couple Zack PoV chapters planned, but they'll be cute I promise!
I think my email app on my Ipod is tired of me clicking 'update' cuz I keep hoping for reviews! I mean, come on guys! Zena kiss!
I actually hadn't planned that to happen so soon. I had actually planned that to happen after the 'big scene' (which you get a cliffhanger to this chapter), but in the moment, it just kinda happened. It's like I don't control the characters anymore, they just kinda do their own thing and I write it. Anyway, I'm really excited for the next couple of chapters. Both will be exciting and cute at the same time. Then, again if everything goes as I plan, chapter twenty or so you'll find everything out. But, I may cut chapters into two or whatever so chapter twenty could be chapter twenty-three. You're never really sure. ;)
Hugs to: ADuChane and Meepmeep123
Meepmeep123: Congrats to being the quickest reviewer! And I thought you guys might flip over the kiss. :) Even I have fallen in love with my characters (but, since I'm the author, how could I not?). And I hope your email dinged because here ya go!
Okay, since its a short chapter I'm gonna throw you guys some song lyrics.
Emergency by Paramore:
[Chorus:]
Cause I've seen love die
Way too many times
When it deserved to be alive
(When it deserved to be alive)
I've seen you cry
Way too many times
When you deserve to be alive, alive
The chorus is the best part, but the entire song is perfect. The song, though sung by a chick, would be Zack's PoV of Lena.
Next:
The Hunger by Fireflight:
[Chorus:]
And you want Him, and you need Him
But you act like He's not there
Yeah, you know that you're hollow
And something's missing here
So you push and you pull the hole in your soul
But you can't make the hunger disappear
You got a rusted out lock on your door
Getting ready to break
You've held back love long enough
I think it's time to cave
You're waiting for a sign
The fact is faith is blind
[Chorus]
Do you want to spend your whole life jaded?
Stuck in a rut that you created
Why don't you break the cycle?
Let love win
That's most of the song, but the entire song works. This is just kinda how Lena feels about being confused about love and such. How conflicted she is.
Anyhoo.
Music: I'm keeping my Ipod close to me so I know when someone reviews.
Disclaimer: I seriously feel like this has become redundant. I WILL TELL YOU WHEN I OWN PJO!
READ ON!
I'm not proud of how I spent the rest of that day.
I scammed four different businesses and spent two hours pick pocketing. In the evening, I put on my sluttiest outfit and went to a club.
After an hour I was bored and returned home.
I just sat on the couch, back in my father's shirt and spandex, my thumb between my teeth.
I kept replaying Zack kissing me over and over again.
Each time, I felt something inside me move, but it wasn't an unpleasant feeling. I finally understood the phrase 'butterflies in the stomach'.
That night I replayed every conversation we had ever had over in my head, always ending with the kiss. I honestly couldn't tell if it had lasted two seconds or two hours.
All I knew was that I wanted more.
Yet, I wanted him far away.
Yet, that idea broke my heart.
I groaned, throwing my pillow on top of my head.
Was love this complicated?
Love?
I sat up.
Did I love Zack?
I fell back down.
I wasn't sure if I loved him, but I knew it was in the realm of possibility.
All I knew was that I felt so twisted up and tangled inside. Suddenly, I didn't know up from down or east from west. I feel like my entire being had been dramatically altered in some way, and I was still trying to find my way around it. Every old path I used to take, I was now questioning. I was suddenly looking down those dark halls and wondering what lies at the end. Could it really be as bad as I always imagined? Just because it was dark, does that automatically mean it's bad? Just because I can't see the end, does that mean the end is bleak? Just because I don't understand it, does that really make it wrong?
My motto had always been to just keep moving forward and to avoid anything painful. Sure, that was a way to survive, but was that really a way to live?
Before Zack, I hadn't known there was a difference. Now, I was starting to.
Sleep didn't find me for several more hours.
That morning when my alarm blared, it swiftly found itself in pieces by the opposite wall. I was in no mood to be awoken.
I knew today I had to ditch out of NYC. Besides the imminent danger it held, I had to admit, it was a grand city. It made me feel small, which I enjoyed actually. If I didn't know Olympus was hovering over me, I would love how insignificant the huge city made me seem.
All my life, even after my parents death, I felt like I was still in their shadow.
My parents, especially my father, had been some of the greatest heroes to exist. Now here I was, their little daughter, a combination of their greatness. I should be an even better hero than them.
But I didn't want to be great.
And I didn't want to be a hero.
Yet, no one seemed to care about my opinion.
At times like these I felt bitter about who my parents were, but it was over swift. They hadn't asked to be heroes either. Maybe they hadn't wanted to be great. Maybe no hero did. No one seemed to care. They just told their tales and marveled at their heroism, while dreaming to be just like them, not realizing what they were asking for.
Slowly I awoke and got myself out of bed. I slipped into jean shorts, a black T-shirt, and my tall boots. I threw my hair up in a lazy ponytail. I had my father's pen in one of my front pockets (my parents bead necklaces in the other), my mothers hat in my back pocket, my mothers knife in my right boot, and my fathers watch on my wrist.
In a matter of four minutes my stuff was packed. Two minutes later it was in the car. I decided I would go see Zack.
I told myself to see if he was really going through with this, to see if he could leave today, blahblahblah...
But really...
I just wanted to see him.
Cursing myself in Greek, I walked to the drivers seat of my car and hopped in.
I was acting like a goddamn child of Aphrodite.
I remembered that Aphrodite, for a reason I had never understood, was one of those gods who helped protect me.
I think I just discovered why.
I then began cursing the stupid goddess of love.
I turned onto Zack's street and gasped.
His apartment was engulfed in flames.