Okay, so this chapter is from JJ's POV. I wanted some conversations between her and her brother, and considering they're from sweden, it wouldn't make sense if they talked english to each other when they were alone. So yes, a chapter from JJ's POV. And it's not the last one. As you might have already figured out, they're in sweden in this chapter, and I hope that you'll enjoy it. Leave me some reviews, okay?

"Calm down," Dean said when we got our bags at the airport.

"I can't," I breathed, my heart beating hard against my chest. How could I be calm? I hadn't seen my brother in almost two and a half years, and I knew I would see him in just a few minutes. He would stand at the airport, waiting. And I was nervous. I hadn't been this nervous in years. I wasn't even this nervous before I walked up on stage in the talent show.

Dean laughed as I took a deep breath, trying my best to calm down. It didn't work.

"Just… don't stare," I warned as I let go of his hand. I hadn't told my brother about the two of us yet. I wanted him to have an impression about Dean first. I wanted him to tell me what he thought of him before I said anything.

"At what?" he asked, and I was about to answer him when my eyes saw a familiar tall, lanky man standing in the terminal.

He quickly noticed us. I mean, there wasn't that many people on the plane, and the three of us was almost alone in the whole airport. It was late, a small airport, and I knew this would be the case.

I stopped where I was to get a better look of him.

He looked almost exactly the same as the last time I had seen him. He was wearing a thicker sweater, a pair of jeans and sneakers. He was crazy, but he had always been just that. It must be freezing outside, but he was used to it. He's always under dressed. That's just the way he is.

His hair was still the same deep, chocolate color it had always been, and his eye was looking at us where Dean and I stood.

Yes, eye.

The reason I had told Dean not to stare.

Daniel lost one eye after an accident a few years ago. He used to wear an eye patch, but he stopped a while ago. Figured he didn't need it anymore. People could stare all they wanted. He didn't care.

I saw him smile, and I dropped my bag on the floor to walk up to him. It was more like running actually. I wasn't nervous anymore. This was my brother, and I shouldn't be nervous. He's family. And despite all the miles we had between us, we're close.

Meeting him with a smile of my own, I hugged him. Hard, and for a long time.

"Det var ett tag sen. (It's been a while)," he joked, and I laughed. That was an understatement.

Letting go a moment later, I took a step back and noticed Dean standing beside me. Bags and all.

"Det här är Dean, som jag berättade om. (This is Dean, the one I told you about). And Dean, this is my brother."

Reaching their hands out, they said hello and shook each others hands. From the expression on my brother, he already knew exactly what kind of person Dean was. And I wanted to know what he thought of him. It would have to wait, I guessed.

Taking my bag again, we all walked out of the airport and was met by the freezing weather. Yeah, my brother was definitely under dressed. I was wearing two pair of leggins, a pair of sweatpants and a thick jacket, and still I was cold.

Dean and I took our seats in the backseat. I could sit up front, but I didn't want Dean to sit all alone. It's a long drive. Almost one and a half hours normally. But it was a lot of snow, and ice, so it would probably take two and a half hours. We wouldn't be home before midnight.

We talked on the way, in English so that Dean would understand as well. My brother tossed in a few words in Swedish sometimes, asking me something. But it was mostly in English.

"Max?" he asked and I felt my stomach growling. It was heard, as well. My brother laughed, and took a right turn.

"You want food?" I turned to Dean, asking him under my breath as my brother ordered what he wanted.

"Sure," he nodded. Stupid question. Dean always wants food.

"Vad vill ni ha? (What do you want?)" my brother asked and I didn't hesitate when I ordered.

"Fyra Maxmål, två cola, och två green and garlics. (Four Maxmeals, two cokes, and two green and garlics.)"

I was hungry, so I could easily eat two burgers. And I had missed the taste of Max' hamburgers. So much better than McDonald's. McDonald's and Burger King is crap compared to Max.

I ordered four burgers because I knew that Dean could eat two even if he wasn't hungry.

A few minutes later, we were on the road again. This time eating.

I had missed the taste of these burgers. They are better than anything else in the world. And Dean seemed to like them too. And the dip I ordered with it. He likes garlic just as much as I do, so I wasn't surprised.

We had been in the car for almost two hours when suddenly a deer jumped out in front of the car, and Daniel tried to hit the breaks in time. He was driving slowly, but there wasn't any time.

Daniel looked at me through the rear view mirror, and I knew what he was asking so I nodded. After that, he opened the car door and headed out toward the deer to check on it. It was probably dead.

"You okay?" Dean asked, taking my hand.

"I'm fine," I lied. Yeah, this wasn't a car accident in that sense, but it still reminded me of that day. How could it not?

"No, you're not," he saw through me and I sighed. There was no need to lie to him. He knew me too well to know when I was telling the truth or not.

"I'll be fine," I corrected myself and he smiled weakly. "C'mon."

I opened the car door and dragged Dean out with me. I wanted to see what was happening.

My brother was standing a few feet away from the deer, talking on the phone with someone. Probably the police.

Looking at the deer, I could see that it was still breathing. It was dark outside, but I could still see the shallow breaths it was taking. It was most definitely in pain, and I hated that. I knew that my brother did as well.

"Who is he talking to?" Dean asked and I looked at him.

"The police. There's a law saying that you have to report every roadkill. Not many do, because not many knows about the law."

I didn't have the time to say anything else before my brother hung up, and walked up to the car again.

"Vad sa dom? (What did they say?)" I asked and he looked at me as he opened the trunk of the car.

"Det tar över en timme för vildvårdarna att komma hit. (It's going take over an hour for the wild animal service to get here.)"

And with that said he pulled out the rifle he had in the trunk. I knew what he was going to do. He knew that the deer would die a painful death, waiting for the wild animal service to get here. It was better if he killed it himself, and took out its misery. He had probably already told the police.

Dean understood what would happen, so he grabbed my hand and pulled me back into the car. He didn't want me to see it. And to be honest, I didn't want to see it.

"What happened to his eye?" he asked, distracting me. And it worked.

"A few years ago, he was at a bar. A guy pushed forward in the line outside, and my brother told him to step back. Calmly. But the guy was already drunk, and so he threw a bear bottle at him. Straight in his eyes."

"Ouch," he said and I nodded when I heard two shots and I jumped. Dean squeezed my hand, and pulled me closer to him. One of his arms wrapped around my shoulder, and I leaned into his side.

We sat like that for a long time before another car pulled to a stop in front of the one we were in, and I quickly saw that it was a police car.

My brother had come back into the car after shooting the deer, and so now he walked back out to talk to the police. It didn't take long, and thirty minutes later he pulled up in front of his house.

I had forgotten how big it was, but I didn't have a long time to think about it before Sara came to the front door. After giving her a hug, liking the feeling of her baby bump, I introduced Dean to her. And not long after that, we went to bed. It was late, and we all needed the sleep. Especially Dean and I. We had been flying for almost twenty hours, and we hadn't been sleeping anything. So we were both tired.

Sara showed us into a room with two beds. I can't say I blamed them for placing two beds in the guest room. After all, I hadn't told them that Dean and I were together.

Dean fell asleep quickly, but I can't say it was as easy for me. After an hour, I was still awake and figured I could just go up and do something. So I pulled on Dean's hoodie, stepped into my sweatpants and silently walked out of the room.

The house was black, and I decided I wanted to go outside. See the horses. So I pulled on a pair of shoes, and almost jumped when I opened the front door and saw my brother outside. I thought everyone was sleeping.

"Du borde sluta med det där (You should quit that)," I said and nodded toward the cigarette in his hand.

"Det lugnar nerverna (It calms my nerves)," he stated simply and I shrugged. I wouldn't know. I had never tried.

He asked me what I was doing awake, and I told him I couldn't sleep. And figured I would go out and see the horses. He knew I mostly meant Cassius. She was my favorite, and sort of mine. Whenever I was here that is.

He warned me though. She had just given birth, and I knew how she was as a new mother. Overprotective. Like she should be.

He also told me that they were expecting two more foals this week, and that's why he was awake. He had been checking on them.

"Han är en bra kille. (He's a good guy.)" The words were sudden, but I knew he was talking about Dean.

I felt myself smiling as he continued.

"Envis. Säker I sig själv. Bra för dig. När hade du tänkt berätta? (Stubborn. Sure of himself. He's good for you. When were you planning on telling us?)"

I wasn't surprised that he had it figured out.

"Imorgon. (Tomorrow.)"

He asked me how long we had been together, and I answered since Dad's funeral. Almost three months.

"Jag borde ha varit där. (I should have been there.)"

"Han var inte din pappa. (He wasn't your Dad.)

"Jag vet. (I know.)"

With those words, I knew he didn't mean Dad's funeral. He meant Mom's. And Julia's. And Dad's too, but mostly Mom's and Julia's.

I told him I didn't blame him for it. They weren't close. They had never been close. Not since we moved to Vermont. Daniel was only ten, and he thought of it as Mom choosing my Dad over him. He knew better now, but they had still never been close. And I knew he regretted that. But I wanted him to know that I wasn't blaming him. He lived his own life here in Sweden, and I couldn't expect him to go all the way to Vermont for a funeral.

We talked some more before he had to go inside, and I walked toward the stable. It didn't take me long to find Cassius. She was completely white, with a small black dot right next to one of her hooves. She was beautiful.

"Hey, girl," I whispered softly as I entered her box and she let out a grunt, making me laugh. I noticed the small foal next to her, sleeping on the ground and I smiled. He was just as beautiful as his mother, not much older than a few weeks.

"You did good, didn't you?" I murmured and smiled when she moved her head, almost like if she was nodding at me.

I was quiet for a moment when I traced my hand over her body. She recognized me, and wasn't overprotective. She knew I wouldn't do anything to her baby. She knew me as much as I knew her.

Suddenly I felt myself crying, and I didn't fight it. I knew that it would be hard coming to Sweden. Seeing my brother. I had never been here without Mom and Julia. And I missed them. So much.

And it was worse now, because this was Mom's home. This is the town where she grew up. This is where her parents lived. And I could feel her. I hadn't felt her for almost a year, but I could now. She was here, with me. With us. And that made this so much harder.

When all of my tears were over, I slid down on the ground and fell asleep right there.

Biting into my lower lip not to make a sound, my nails dug into Dean's chest and his hands pulled me down closer to him. When I came back down from my orgasm, I stepped off Dean only to lay down next to his side. He was still on his back, and his arm came around me to pull me closer to him while we were still trying to catch our breaths. One of my arms wrapped around his torso, and I rested my head against his shoulder as I pressed myself against him.

I really liked being naked with Dean – actually I loved it. It's weird, because I usually wasn't comfortable being naked. Not even when it was just me. But now, with Dean, it was like the most natural thing in the world. I loved the way I could feel his muscles, and every little movement he made. I loved how I could feel his breathings, and his warm skin against mine. And the way he both accepted and respected me. The way he made me feel sexy by just one glance.

As my breath came back down to normal, I watched his chest heave up and down and noticed red marks after my nails. I let my hand trace over them gently, wishing for them to go away.

"That must have hurt…" I whispered and I heard a gentle chuckle. "What?"

"It's the opposite," he clarified, and I wasn't sure I believed him. I could feel his free arm trace along my side, and then suddenly my leg was wrapped around his lower waist. His hand rested on my thigh, and I felt myself smiling against his skin.

It was the morning of Christmas Eve, and we had been in Sweden for two days now. The only family members I had met yet was my brother, but I would meet the rest today. They would all come over around noon, to celebrate Christmas. I knew it would be weird for Dean to celebrate Christmas today, but it's the way we do it in Sweden. Dean and I had already agreed though that we wouldn't open our presents until tomorrow. I would give him his, and then Liam and Jenna had sent something with us that was for the both of us. I had no idea of what it was, but I wanted to know. Dean and I had actually almost opened it yesterday. Both Liam and Jenna could be quite evil when it comes to gifts, so them buying something together, for the both of us… That could only end with something mean. And it probably had something to do with sex.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked after a short moment of silence.

"You. Me. Us. The things you did to me last night…" I saw his grin and it caused me to chuckle. "What time is it?"

I lifted my head a little bit to watch the clock sitting on the wall.

"Seven thirty," I answered him with a smile and then lay my head back against his shoulder. My hand was above his heart, and I could feel its steady beats. It was comforting, and it made me relax. But I wasn't tired. Not yet.

"Just to inform you, those eight hours were the best of my life."

"Oh, really?" I asked as I got up on my elbow so that I could watch him properly. I could see him opening his eyes, and they met mine.

"Definitely."

"And yet we only managed to have sex twice."

We might have only had sex twice during the last eight hours, but we had been working for it for eight hours. Or maybe I should say, driving each other crazy.

Just our frigging foreplay lasted for three hours, compared to our usual… twenty minutes? Our longest foreplay had been almost forty minutes, and the shortest had been like five. Now it was three frigging hours, and I can't say I wasn't impressed. There were so many times during those hours that I thought Dean was going to burst. That hard-on somehow managed to keep growing and growing, and I don't know how he manged to keep it all inside for so long. After almost three hours of making out, his hand finally reached down between my legs. I had to beg for him to go underneath my panties, which is probably exactly what he wanted me to do, but even before then I was so close to climaxing. So I can't say I was surprised when he didn't last for long after I put my hand in his boxers.

After that, we just kept going. And going.

"Still the best eight hours of my life. And I have to say you impressed me."

"Then I will have to throw my legs behind my head more often," I joked and he grinned.

In just a short second, Dean rolled us over in a swift movement and I laughed as I landed on my back with him above me. My arms locked around him as my legs did the same, and I felt one of his hands grab my ass.

"You should definitely do that," he stated in a murmured voice as his lips came closer to mine, and then they touched.

I started to suck on his lower lip, but the kiss didn't last for long before I heard his stomach growl. And just a second after that, it was my turn.

With both of us laughing, we agreed we should just go get some breakfast. We would have to go up soon anyway if we wanted to shower before we had to help out with all the food, and then everybody would be here.

I quickly found a new bra and a pair of panties in my bag before I pulled on Dean's t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants. Dean managed to be done just a second before I was, but he started to laugh and I asked why. He told me to take a look in a mirror.

And when I did I saw that my hair was much more than a mess, so I put it in a tail and then I opened the door. Dean snatched my hand as we walked through the house to get to the kitchen, and I gladly squeezed his hand back.

Dean and I found my brother and Sara in the kitchen, and when they noticed us Sara asked if we wanted to go out on a horse ride. Looking at Dean, I translated and I wasn't surprised when he said he would skip it. But I would get him up on a horse, one way or another. Maybe just not today.

After getting some breakfast, I got dressed properly and then I followed out into the stable to get a horse ready. Since Cassius had just given birth, I took Athena – a beautiful, black mare.

I hadn't been on a horse back in almost two years, but it was nice to be back on one. It was amazing to feel the movements of a horse underneath me as she galloped through the snow. After a moment, we all slowed down into a walking pace and let the horses walk through the deep snow as we talked. About a lot of things. About what had happened since I was here the last time, we talked about the coming baby, and we talked about me and Dean. I told them I was kinda nervous about today – meeting everyone again. Introducing them to Dean. I knew both Daniel and Sara liked him, but of course I wanted the rest to like him as well. He's my best friend, and my boyfriend. And they're family. Of course I want them to like one another.

Almost two hours after we had went out, we came back and I was working on brushing Athena when we heard it. Both Daniel and Sara dropped their things and jogged over to another box, and I followed them to Freja. It was time for her to give birth. I know it probably wouldn't take long, so when Sara ran into the house I followed her. She had to get some stuff in case they needed to help out, and I wanted to get Dean. He should see this: it's pretty incredible.

"Dean!" I called out, running through the house. I found him in front of the TV, and he wasn't ready when I grabbed his wrist and pulled him out of the easy chair he was sitting in.

"What's going on?" he asked, and I told him to put on some shoes. He could see I was serious, so he didn't ask me about it.

His next question was "why are we running?"

"Trust me, you want to see this."

I pulled us into a stop when we reached the stable, and I quickly led him to the right box. None of us said anything as we watched Sara do her job. Dean wrapped his arms around me, and I leaned against his chest as I felt myself get nervous. I didn't like the look in Sara's face, and she confirmed my slight worry when she said that the foal was stuck. They would have to pull him out.

I was surprised when Daniel asked me if I wanted to help out, but I couldn't say no. Of course I wanted to help out. I just had no idea of what to do. I followed Sara's lead, and a few short moments later a white foal was out. I felt myself smiling when I saw Freja cleaning him, and I leaned against Dean again.

"That was pretty incredible. A little gross, but still incredible," Dean whispered in my ear and I pulled him closer to me as I smiled.

"I know."

I heard Daniel mumble something as he watched the foal on the ground, and we all waited patiently for the first few steps. Those were important. As the foal tried to get up, Freja tried to help out as much as she could. It was her third baby, so she knew what to do. As the foal got up, his legs shaky, he tried to take a step. But he fell down, and a low round of laughter was heard. As he tried again, he managed to walk a few steps and his legs instantly turned steadier. He would be just fine.

I saw a glance between Sara and Daniel, and then they looked at me. They told me I could pick a name.

"Vad sägs om… Apollo? (How about… Apollo?)"

"Perfekt. (Perfect.)"

Since the living room was pretty much crowded, Dean and I shared one of the easy chairs in the room. The kids had taken over the floor, and some people were on stools and others were sitting in the couch or standing. We we're almost thirty people in here, and it was all family. And it was wonderful to see them again.

Dean had already told me he had no idea that my family was this big, and I told him that not even everyone was here. Almost fifteen people were missing. And this was only my mothers side, and then of course Sara's parents and sister. But yeah, we're a big family.

After making sure Freja and Apollo were both okay, we had went inside the house again. Dean and I had taken a shower, and then helped out with the food before people started to come over. Sara had checked on the new foal and the new mother once every other just to make sure everything was perfect, and it was.

We had recently eaten, and now we were watching TV. It was a swedish tradition to watch Kalle Anka (Donald Duck) and there was probably very few families right now that wasn't watching it. It's a show that's been airing since the fifties, and it consists of short clips from Disney cartoons.

I knew Dean didn't understand this tradition at all, but he was just as quiet as every one else. It was a serious tradition, and no one said anything. We all must have watched this a dozen of times, and I knew most of the lines, but we all still watched it. It was tradition after all. It's weird and all, but Sweden is pretty much closed off between 3-4 am on December 24th.

When it was over, it was time for gifts. Like always. Within the family, we always had a Santa Claus for the younger kids. Even though I missed my parents, and Julia, and being in our cabin, this was something I had missed too. Seeing the awe on the kids as Santa - aka Sara's sister's boyfriend - walked through the doors with a bag over his shoulder. It was just a few gifts in the bag, and the rest were under the Christmas tree. I knew that as soon as Santa was gone, I would probably be the one to handle the gifts. Handing them out. Dean and I had already agreed on opening our gifts tomorrow, since they were from home and home we celebrate Christmas on the 25th. But I knew I had some gifts from my family, and I would open them today.

I was wearing my pair of tight, red jeans and when I left Dean's lap I could feel his eyes on me. I laughed to myself because I knew exactly what he was watching, and because he had the guts to stare at my ass in front of my entire family.

It took almost an hour before all the gifts were handed out, and then we could start the opening of them. I had three gifts, since not many knew I would come here over Christmas. But it didn't matter. It's not something I care about.

A few hours later people had gone home, and left was just me, Dean, Daniel, Sara, Sanna – Sara's sister -, Sanna's boyfriend, Daniel's Dad and his wife, and then there was my grandparents and my aunt.

"Thanks," Dean said, a little surprised when Daniel handed him a beer and I smiled. We might only be seventeen, but Daniel had always been cool with that kind of stuff. I turned mine down as I pulled my legs up and leaned back in the couch. Dean was in the easy chair beside me, and we were close enough to touch.

"So what do you think about Sweden?" Sanna asked, and Dean chuckled.

"I can't say J.J didn't warn me about the cold," he said and I felt myself laughing with him. "But other than that, it's pretty cool. I wouldn't mind coming back some time, and the language is kinda sexy."

I wasn't alone when I laughed this time, and my brother shook his head.

"That's something you've got wrong though. But, if J.J comes back home some time, you're welcome to come with her."

"What do you mean if? I'll be back this summer to check on my niece or nephew" I stated, staring at him and he laughed again.

"When," he corrected himself and I rolled my eyes, smiling.

"Better."

We continued to talk, and after a moment Dean excused himself. As soon as he was out of the room, I looked at everyone. I had to ask something.

"Jag måste fråga… Vad tycker ni? (I have to ask… What do you think?)"

"Om honom, eller om er? (About him, or you?)" My aunt asked and I shrugged.

"Båda. (Both.)"

I already knew what Daniel and Sara thought about Dean, and us as a couple. I knew they liked him, and I knew Daniel thought we were good for each other. It's not like I would break up with Dean if they all hated him, but their opinion still meant a lot to me.

They all seemed to agree though that he was a good guy, and that we were cute together.

"Killar med hans utseende brukar ha en sak gemensamt. (Guys with his looks usually have something in common.)"

"Vadå för något? (What's that?)" I asked my grandmother and she winked.

"Dom är bra I sängen. (They're good in bed.)"

My grandmother was only seventeen when she had my mother, and Mom was still young when she had me so my grandparents weren't old in any sense. But I can't believe she just said that. And did she even have the experience? As far as I knew, the only guy she'd ever been with was her husband – my grandfather. Not that I ever wanted to think of that again.

"Jag tänker låtsas att jag inte hörde det där. (I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that.)"

Everyone laughed at my words, and that's when Dean came back into the room. I felt myself blushing when I saw all the girls in the room watching him with a grin, and I stood up.

Walking into the kitchen, I felt Dean following me. He had finished his beer, so I took one from the fridge and handed it to him after I opened it and took a quick zip from it.

"Why were you blushing in there?" he chuckled as I took a glass of water, and I rolled my eyes. Of course he noticed.

"My grandmother might have mentioned how guys looking as good as you are often good in bed," I said and felt myself blushing again as Dean laughed.

"Well, she was right. I am good looking, and I am good in bed."

"No, you're not," I stated and looked him in the eyes. He was much more than that.

"Then what am I?" he asked, a teasing smile on his lips.

"That's not the point."

"Then what is?" he murmured, walking closer to me. My back was leaning against the counter, and Dean placed both of his hands on either of my side. He leaned down just a little closer, and as he bit his lip I forgot completely what I was going to say.

As I swallowed hard he laughed quietly.

"What was your point?" he asked again, his voice a soft murmur, as I stared into his green eyes.

And my mind went blank yet again.

"I don't know," I confessed and he laughed as he took a step backward.

What he did to me, and how easily, was crazy. Insane. But I loved it.

He turned serious as he took his beer again.

"Can I ask something?"

"Anything," I answered as I jumped up on the counter and swung my legs back and forward where I was sitting.

"Why did you stop drinking? I mean, you didn't drink much, but at least you were drinking at parties. You could get drunk. Now? The most you've been drinking was the Bacardi we drank the night I told you I love you."

He was right. I used to drink. I could get drunk at parties. Dean and I could sneak home drunk together. I had never been drunk enough to pass out, but I had been drunk. Several times. But it changed with the accident. I was scared, I guess. I was scared that if I drank, I wouldn't be able to stop. So I didn't drink for a year. The first night I drank after the accident was when Dad was back in a coma, and Dean told me he loved me. After not drinking for so long, I didn't enjoy the taste anymore. And even though I knew it wouldn't happen, I was still scared. Scared of not being able to stop. Scared of drinking up my life. I had seen it happen to too many people not to be scared.

And I told Dean all of this.

"I might drink myself drunk once in a while," Dean said and walked up to me, placing his hands on the side of my thighs. His eyes penetrated mine, and it was easy to hear how serious he was. "And I might enjoy the taste of alcohol. But I would never, ever have let you drink your life away, Freckles."

"I know, Dean. And I love you for that," I whispered and placed one of my hands on the side of his face, my fingers twisting with his thick hair.

"I love you too."

"I'm not surprised," I said, looking at the book on the bed. Looking at Liam and Jenna's gift for me and Dean. A book consisting of around 100 sexual positions, and tips, tricks and challenges. I knew they had laughed when they bought it, and they would probably laugh thinking about us opening it. And then asking us about it when we get home.

"The worst is that they know we're going to use it," Dean added and I chuckled.

"You think we're going to use it?" I asked seriously, grinning on the inside.

"J.J, that's one hundred different positions to have sex in. We've used six of those. Of course we're going to use it."

I laughed again, turning my head to place a kiss on his lips.

"As long as I get to read it first," I said, and he glared at me. I glared back. After a long moment of having a glaring competition, we both gave up. We knew we could keep it up for a long time.

"Fine. Now move that perfect ass of yours," he grinned and I chuckled as I moved from his lap and sat down in the bed. I watched Dean as he leaned over the bed, wearing nothing but his black boxers. He had no idea of how sexy he was in this moment. As he leaned back up, he had two boxes in his hands.

"That's from Mom and Keith," he said and handed me a small box. Then he handed me a bigger one. "And that's from me."

"Dean…" I protested but he cut me off.

"Shut up. It's already too late. But don't worry, I got you something for New Years Eve as well," he grinned and I shook my head in disapproval. I knew there was no use in arguing. He had already bought me whatever it was, and he wouldn't give in.

I leaned down over the bed to my bag, searched through it and took out his two gifts. One box, and one envelope.

"That's from me," I said and gave him the envelope. "And the box is from your Mom."

"I should have guessed," Dean sighed. "Of course she wouldn't settle with giving me the trip to Sweden, even though she can't afford it."

I chuckled and took the smaller box to open it. It held a bracelet, and it was beautiful.

"It looks good on you," Dean said as he helped me put it on, and I smiled. I loved it.

"Okay, so what's this?" I muttered as I took the other box, and opened it. Only to find lingerie. I can't say I was surprised. It was sexy, but it somehow managed to look comfortable.

Dean knew I hated thongs, so he hadn't got me a thong. But the blood red material wasn't a full hipster either. It was half hipster, half thong – a so called "cheeky". It was a matching set, so both the panties and the bra had lace. Looking at the size, I noticed that he had it right.

"So how did you find out my size?" I wondered as I pulled the oversized t-shirt over my head.

"I have my sources," he answered me, watching as I reached my hands behind my back and unclasped my bra. As I took it off, I chuckled as his eyes stayed on my breasts. He swallowed as I took the new bra, unclasped it and then put it on. The clasp on the bra was in the front, and I really liked it. It was comfortable, and it was a perfect size.

His disappointed look only lasted for a second, so I figured that he liked the way I looked in the new bra.

"Like what you see?"

"When I was in the store, I imagined how you would look in the bra. In the color."

"And?"

"I never could have guessed that you'd look this sexy."

I laughed as I pulled the t-shirt over my head again and Dean's mouth turned into a pout. I tossed a pillow at him, and then I told him to open his gift.

He started with mine, and I smiled as I saw his eyes widen.

"Are you kidding me?"

"No," I smiled and shook my head.

"So you actually got me an hour at a racing track, in a NASCAR car?"

"Yep."

I laughed as I watched him take it in - watched him realize that he would drive a real racing car.

"I love you," he blurted out and I laughed.

"I love you too."

His eyes returned to the gift card in his hands, and I laughed again as I smiled. I loved that he liked it.

After staring at it for a short moment, he grinned and put it aside before he grabbed the box from his Mom. And then I watched his smile fall as he opened it, and I asked him about it.

Staring into the box, a wider smile grew on his lips and I really wanted to know what was in there.

"What's in there? You know I'm curious," I said and he chuckled softly as he placed his hand in the box. And when it came back out, he was holding a tiny, pink sock.

We knew what that meant. He was getting a baby sister.

"You're getting a sister?" I asked, my voice a whisper.

"Apparently," he chuckled and I moved so that I was straddling him. Through that smile of his, I could see nervousness. I could see that he was scared. I knew he was excited about the baby, but I don't think he gave much thought to it. Not yet. But now he was forced to.

"You," I said as I stared into his eyes and grabbed his face, "are going to be one fantastic brother."

"You think so?"

"No," I shook my head. "I'm sure of it."

"It's not like… I never even thought of getting a sister. What do I do? What do I teach her, and how do I protect her? How…" He was trying to hide it, but he was desperate for answers. So I leaned my forehead against his and placed a finger over his lips to make him shut up. His eyes looked deep into mine, and I smiled.

"It will come, trust me. You teach her everything you know, and everything she wants to know. You protect her by being there, and by telling her that you'll always be there. She will feel like the safest girl in the world with you around."

"What makes you think that?"

"Because you just have to look at me to make me feel safe. To make me feel like nothing could ever happen to me. Like everything is right in the world. When you came to the hospital, after the accident… When you looked at me, everything felt okay. Even for just a short second. You spread this feeling of safety, and warmth, whereever you go, and you always have. And you probably always will. I hope so at least."

"You told me that I always say the right things, always make you feel better. It's the same thing with you."

Leaning in, I placed a chaste kiss on his lips and I smiled when his lips lingered on mine for a few seconds.

"Go call your Mom. And tell her I said "thanks" for the bracelet."

"What did you get me?" I asked, and he laughed as he took out a small box from one of his pockets. I took it from him and he laughed again.

"Don't get too excited."

"I'm not," I lied. He always managed to get me something I really wanted. And I had no doubt that he would get me something I would love.

So I as I opened the box, I wasn't disappointed. In it was a silver necklace, a pendant hanging on it. But it wasn't any pendant. In a beautiful writing, his name was written.

"I love it," I smiled.

"You mentioned once that you wanted one," he said matter of factly and took the necklace from my hands only to lock it around my neck. I smiled as I felt it and I was just about to thank him when he talked.

"That wasn't the whole thing."

"What more is there?" I asked and he gave me another box. Opening it, I found another silver necklace. But the chain was thicker and longer, and instead of his name, my name was written.

"It's something for the both of us," he answered my questioning eyes, took the chain and locked it around his neck. The chain was long enough to go two laps around his neck, and it looked hot on him. I had never seen him use any kind of jewelry, so to see him use one with my name on it… It meant a lot to me.

"I love it," I repeated and reached up to kiss him.

Two hours later, we were outside, in each other's arms.

"You know what I learned this year?" Dean asked, warming me where we stood outside. It was almost midnight, almost a new year. Usually, I knew that my brother would go out. Hang out with friends. Get drunk. But since Sara was pregnant, and we were here, he was home. We were outside, because we were waiting for midnight. We were waiting to light the fireworks. To watch the black night sky turn colorful.

"What have you learned?" I mused, pulling Dean closer to me. My back was leaning against his chest, and even though Daniel and Sara was only a few meters away from us, I knew they couldn't hear us. They were having their own conversation, and so was Sara's sister and her boyfriend. Those four were close, so it made sense that they were here.

"That my girlfriend is crazy."

"Which one?" I teased, and he chuckled.

"Both."

"Your ex is obvious, but how about that other girlfriend? Why is she crazy?"

"There's two reasons. Yesterday, her brother made a hole in the ice and then they all jumped into the water. It was freezing."

"That could prove that you're a coward, too," I grinned and he scoffed.

"Not even Liam would jump in."

I shrugged, and he continued.

"And the other reason… She let her brother's friend tattoo her. I didn't even know she wanted a tattoo."

Yeah, I had a tattoo now. And it was actually only a few hours old, but I loved it. It wasn't anything special or anything, it was just three stars in my neck. I had always wanted something in honor of Mom, Dad and Julia, and stars made sense. So I had three of them in my neck now, and I knew I would never regret it.

"You know what I learned this year?" I changed the subject, and I felt him shaking his head. "I learned not to take everything for granted. Just everything… Mom, Dad, Julia… I took them for granted. I thought they would always be there. But then one day, they were gone. And I can't take anyone or anything for granted anymore. I can't hold back. Life is short, and I don't want to miss out on it. Any of it. Because one day, it might all be gone."

"You can't do that."

"Do what?" I asked, confused.

"Turn all serious on me. Not about that. And I'm not going anywhere, so take me for granted if you want to."

I turned around as he spoke, and I could see how serious he was. His low voice was intense, and so was his eyes. Actually, it was more than intense. There was just something about his eyes. I had seen that look so many times.

I had never seen Dean cry, except for once. When we were, what nine? And that doesn't even count. He had seen me cry a thousand times, and he had always been strong. But there was that look – the look he had now. He was trying with everything he had in him not to go weak. He wanted to be strong above everything else.

He knew my parents, he knew my sister. He might not admit it himself, but I know that my family was a second family to him. Just like Mary and Keith had always been to me. He had spent just as many nights at my place as I had at his, and when I told him that my sister was bullied he was pissed.

So seeing me like this, talking about them… I knew he wanted to be strong, and he was, but a part of him wasn't. He never showed it though, and if I didn't know him so well I wouldn't notice. But those eyes told me everything.

"You really think I'm crazy?" I asked, changing the subject again, and he smiled softly.

"Yeah, but it only makes me love you more," he murmured and I laughed when he placed a kiss on my nose. "I love you."

"I love you," I echoed him and turned around just in time to hear the twelfth strike of the clock. It was midnight. It was 2011.

Wishing each other a happy new year, I could see the two couples around us pull even closer to each other in a kiss. And I was going to do the same thing with Dean, but I had one small thing to do before that.

After taking a picture of my brother and Sara kissing, his hand on her stomach, I turned to Dean.

"You done?" he asked, and I smiled.

"I'm all yours."

Instead of answering me, he smiled and leaned down.

A lot of things had happened this year, and I knew that a lot of things would happened in the year coming. I still missed my family, and I knew that a part of me always would. I would still struggle. But everything felt pretty damn good where I was standing, kissing in the year year with Dean.