Wow, I am sorry it took so long to get this up and published. But it's here now. And it's the last chapter. As you will notice, I jumped quite some time since you saw Dean and Jennie last. But I felt like I had to, because I had so many stories with them to tell, but at the same time I lost interest in this story. So I tried to put as much as possible into here, and also, as you will see, I mashed the two last chapters into one.
So this really is the last I will see of you, and this is the last you will see of this story. I hope you have enjoyed it so far, and I hope the ending won't disappoint you. So read and review, one last time?
J.J
As I paced back and forth in the room, I could feel Jenna's eyes on me. She looked kind of worried.
"Go, and know that's it normal to be nervous," I told her. She had stuff to do.
"Just promise to take a deep breath, try to not throw up, and don't trip," she grinned before she left and I cursed under my breath. She wasn't really helping. I didn't have to worry about tripping just yet, but she was right about the not throwing up part. She just didn't know how right she was.
I did as I was told, and stopped my pacing. I stood in the middle of the room, which was actually a big, white tent. It would probably hold about fifty people, and I don't know why it was so big. There wasn't supposed to be many people in it. Just me, and some people that kept walking in and out. They didn't exactly help with the nerves either.
So I stopped, closed my eyes and tried to take Jenna's advice. Deep breaths – in and out. In and out. As I did so, I felt two arms that snaked around my waist and first I thought it was my brother. But it felt wrong. It was the wrong smell, the wrong amount of muscles, the wrong height. As I pondered about who it was, I heard the voice and I recognized it in a matter of milliseconds.
"You're the most beautiful best friend that's ever existed," he said and I threw myself around and into Liam's arms. After giving him a hug, I took a step back and saw him grin.
"Asshole," I told him, giving him a vague slap on the arm. He could take it. He deserved it.
"What the hell was that for?" he laughed and I glared at him. He knew why.
"You know why; we thought you were dead," I looked at his uniform, and knew that he could have been. "We're all worried sick, since none of us have heard anything in weeks."
"We lost the phone connection a few weeks ago."
"You could have written a letter," I stated and he rolled his eyes.
"My pen stopped working," he shrugged and I fought the urge to hit him again. I settled for the word "jackass," before I took his hand and led us to some of the chairs that were standing in the tent.
"What are you doing here anyway? You said you wouldn't be able to make it," I wondered as we sat down and he grinned again. I had missed him. We all had.
When he left for the army a year ago, everyone was scared. I was scared in a different way. I wasn't willing to loose my best friend in war, as I lost my father. Just no. But he was alive, and he was sitting in front of me. And even though he had almost a year left, it felt good to see him. No matter for how long it was.
"I thought I wouldn't be, but they eventually agreed to give me 72 hours of permission. So I have to get on a plane in a few hours again, but no way in hell I'm missing this party."
"Have you seen him yet?" I wanted to know, and he shook his head.
"Not yet – on my way there now though."
"Don't go, let it be a surprise. I wanna see his face when you walk down the aisle."
"When I walk down the aisle?" he asked and I laughed. That didn't exactly sound like it did in my head.
"Be his best man, Li. Like it was supposed to be. You should have seen his face after you told us you wouldn't be able to make it. He want you by his side today."
"What, he didn't ask anyone else?" I saw a smile building on his lips and I chuckled.
"No. You've always been his best man. For 20 years. And you always will be."
"I guess I have to then," he smiled but I knew Liam too well. He was thrilled. He really wanted this. "But can I ask you something first?"
"Anything," I told him, and he looked wary. Like he didn't know how to form the question in the right way. And that was very unlike the Liam I had always known. "What's on your mind?"
"Is it the dress, the bra, or implants?" he grimaced after asking it, and I jumped up on my feet.
"Fuck, is it that obvious?" I asked him, worried that anyone would notice. I knew Liam wouldn't exactly stare, since he was my best friend. And I was getting married to his other best friend. He wouldn't stare.
"Implants, really?" he asked and stood up. "Why? Haven't they always been great?"
"No, Li! I'm pregnant."
As my voice was pretty loud, I was scared that someone would have overheard me, but I couldn't hear any voices outside and that relieved me. No one knew yet. It was just me and Dean. We were gonna tell people when we got back from our honeymoon in two weeks. I was still worried about how we were supposed to trick people into believing that I would actually drink alcohol today. Dean said it was okay, since people knew I didn't really like alcohol anyway. I didn't quite believe him. People would wonder.
I watched Liam's face go from shocked, to even more shocked, to confused, and then as he tried to form words. His mouth kept opening and closing, but then he settled for a grin.
"You're pregnant? I'm – I'm gonna be an uncle?"
"Yeah, you're gonna be an uncle," I chuckled and received his hug. "Don't tell anyone. No one knows yet. Just you, me and Dean."
"What did he say? Was it planned? How long?"
"Twelve weeks," I explained and gave him a smile. "No, it wasn't planned. But we're twenty-seven years old, we both have our careers, and we're ready. After everything, that much we are."
"I can't believe you're gonna have a baby," he grinned. "We all thought it was over for a while."
Yeah, we all did.
After college, I was offered a job in Australia. Dean still had a year left of school, and after that he had a secured job. He couldn't just leave that. And I wanted that job in Australia. It would put me on the map as a photographer. And Dean and I both agreed that a year really wasn't that much. I came home for his graduation again, and we had a week together. But then I had to tell him that I was offered another year, and I didn't know what to do. I liked it over there, but I missed him. After a few days of talking about it, he finally told me that I should go back. But that he wouldn't be there when I came home. It was too hard to just talk on the phone. Long-distance relationships weren't easy, we both knew that. But we never thought that it would be the end of us. None of us wanted that, we both loved each other. But it was just too hard. He said that I would be just fine without him, and that I should go. I hated him for it, but as the months passed, I realized that letting me go was the most selfless thing he had ever done. I came back about a year later, when Liam and Jenna turned 23. I knew he would be there, and he knew I would be there. I figured that we were both adults, and we could act like that. We were once best friends, and despite everything, I didn't want to loose that. So I thought we would be able to act civilized. We weren't. We ended up having sex in the bathroom, cheating on our respective partners. I never thought that I would be able to cheat on anyone, and I knew that it just wasn't in Dean's nature. But it was us, and it felt good. Right. That's when we promised each other that no matter how hard things would be, we would never, ever give up on each other like that again. I had never stopped loving him, and apparently he had never stopped loving me.
So I went back to Australia, quit my job, broke up with my boyfriend, and came back home to San Francisco. Back home to Dean. And the dog that he had apparently rescued out of a fire.
"Do you have everything?" Liam asked a few minutes later, and I looked at him. What did he mean? "Something new, old, pink, whatever."
"Something new, something old, something borrowed, something blue," I laughed and counted what I had. "Something old," I pointed at my dress, a re-make of Mom's wedding dress. "Something new," I placed my hand on my stomach and he grinned. "Something blue," I lifted my arm and showed him the bracelet I was wearing. It used to belong to Julia, and it was the only thing I had from her. It held a blue stone, so it was perfect as I wanted her close. "I don't have anything borrowed though."
"Then here you go," Liam took out his ID from his pocket and I laughed. "But I want it back."
"You'll get it back," I promised and placed it in my bra before I turned around and opened a box that was standing on the table. I wanted everyone close to me today, which is why I had made my own wedding dress from Mom's. Why I wore Julia's bracelet. Why I took out Dad's old army dog tag from the box and placed it in my bra, right next to my heart. He wasn't going to walk me down the aisle, but that didn't mean that he wasn't there. Because he was. And in a way, he would always be.
"Who are you talking to?" I heard Jenna's voice, but it became more quiet with every word she said. As I turned around, I saw her standing a few meters away from us, staring at Liam. Her make-up and hair had been done for over an hour, but she was now wearing her dress. It was beautiful.
"Hi, sis," Liam smiled, and Jenna just stood there. She was shocked to see him. When she realized how to move again, she threw herself in his arms and I could hear his deep laugh.
"I should come back more often, getting attacked by beautiful women like this."
"Oh, shut up asshole," Jenna told him as she leaned out and I chuckled to myself. It was nice to see that smile on her again. I hadn't really seen it since he left a year ago. She was always so worried, and I couldn't blame her. Just like Jenna always told me I had a special smile when I was around Dean, she had always had a certain smile around her brother.
"Can I borrow my niece for a second?" I heard David's voice all of a sudden, and Jenna gave me a hug before Liam did the same thing.
"I'll see you out there," he whispered and I felt myself smiling before the two left, arm in arm. I wasn't worried that Dean would see him. Liam wanted to see his face just as much as I did. He would make sure Dean didn't see him until it was time.
Which was soon.
I was nauseous again.
I shook it away and turned to David. He took a seat in one of the chairs, and his facial expression made me worried. What did he want to talk to me about, and why did he look so sad?
"David?" I asked, sitting down next to him.
"He never prepared me for this," he started, looking at me. I was confused. "Ever since we found out about your engagement, I've been thinking about what the hell to tell you. But I don't know. I can't speak for him, so I figured I should just give you a hug and wish you luck."
And that's what he did. We stood up and he hugged me, not caring to clear out my confusion.
"You make a beautiful bride," he smiled and handed me something. A piece of paper. A letter.
As he walked out of the room, I sat down again and stared at it.
Dad.
A new letter.
I stared at the envelope for a moment, taking in his handwriting. There had been no letters since the one he wrote in the hospital, for my eighteenth birthday. But that was almost ten years ago, and my hopes for a new letter had disappeared. I figured he had told me everything he wanted to tell me. Taught me everything I could learn.
"To my beautiful daughter."
I took a deep breath before I turned the envelope around to open it. It wasn't a thick letter, and I wiped a tear away before unfolding it. I wasn't supposed to cry. Not today. Not now.
Jenna had prepared me for tears of happiness with waterproofed make-up, but I wasn't one to cry. But this was a letter from Dad. My Dad. And I didn't know what else to do but to shed a tear, knowing that he actually had another letter for me. For this day.
I took a deep breath, and started to read.
When you were seven, your Mom called me and told me you were getting married. Apparently you had met this new boy in school, and you became friends. You wrote me a letter about it, telling me all about him. Your mother and I never thought it would last. You were seven, how were you supposed to know who you wanted to spend the rest of your life with? But we laughed about it many times.
I left again yesterday, and like always, we shared one of the letters we had written. I don't know if your mother has ever told you, but it's a part of us saying goodbye. Somehow we got into your engagement with that boy, and we laughed again, because apparently you did know who you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. No, maybe there was never a wedding between my beautiful seven year old girl and her seven year old friend. But you're sixteen now, and you're still good friends. And being able to choose a best friend when you're seven, you make me confident that you have chosen a good man to be your husband.
Because that's why we're here right? It's why I'm writing you this letter.
It hurts me that I won't walk you down the aisle in just a few moments, and it hurts me that I will never see you in that wedding dress. See you happy with the man of your dreams.
I don't know who you're marrying, and I don't know what kind of man he is. All I know for sure is that he's a lucky man, for capturing your heart.
I trust you and your judgment, and therefore I trust that you will be happy with this man. That he is kind to you, and that he knows how to take care of you. That he every day shows you how much he really loves you. Because you deserve someone like that, sweetheart. And don't settle for less.
I don't know what else to tell you than that I wish I was there, and that I wish I would always be there. Other than that, know that I will always love you, as I always have.
And you make a beautiful bride.
Love, Dad.
I stared down at the letter, trying to stop the tears from falling even harder. But I couldn't stop them, and despite my will I started to cry hysterically. I didn't let it go on for long, and when Jenna came into the room five minutes later, my tears had nearly dried.
"J.J?" she asked, clearly worried. "What happened?"
"Give me your phone," I demanded instead of answering her question. She looked at me, and I demanded it again. She quickly found her phone in her purse that was standing on the table and handed it to me.
"I'm fine, I'll see you out there soon," I promised. She nodded carefully as I waved her out of the room, and I dialed Dean's number as I walked up to the mirror. I looked into it as I heard the signals, waiting for him to pick up. Or someone that could at least hand the phone to him.
My eyes were swollen and red, but my make-up still looked good. My hair laid perfectly the way it had been made, and my dress fell down the way it was supposed to. Despite the tears, I looked like the bride I was.
"Hi," I heard a voice and I felt myself smiling.
"Do you think I could talk to your brother for a moment?" I asked, and laughed at her reply.
"He's not supposed to talk to the bride." I heard Dean's voice in the background, and a second later he was the one on the other end, and not his sister.
"I think she got that all wrong," he chuckled. "I'm not supposed to see the bride, but I can talk to her all I want."
His voice reminded me of Dad's letter again, and more tears started to fall. When he heard the sob, the amusement in his voice ran away and all I could hear was worry.
"Hey, what's wrong?" he wanted to know, and I tried to find my voice. I wasn't supposed to cry. It wasn't supposed to be like this.
"I got another letter, Dean," I whispered, wiping the tears away.
"Oh," he understood, "What did it say? Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," I lied, trying to reassure him.
"No you're not," he knew me all too well, and I could picture the face that went with the voice.
"I miss him so much," I whispered. "All of them. I can't believe we're getting married without them here."
"I'm coming over," he told me, and I could hear movements. I knew why he said what he said. He truly did want to come over, and I wanted him to. I wanted to see him, hold him, I wanted him to comfort me. But I would see him soon enough, and we weren't supposed to see each other just yet.
"No you're not," I argued with him. "You're staying right where you are. If you see me, it might ruin the surprise."
"What surprise?" he wanted to know, and I chuckled.
"It wouldn't be a surprise if I told you, would it?"
I heard him let out a sigh, and then I saw his mother walk through the opening to my tent.
"I should go, your Mom's here," I announced, and I could almost hear him nod.
"I know, I sent her."
"I see you soon, I love you."
"Love you more," he replied before I hung up and I smiled through my drying tears.
I looked at Mary, and admired her hair and dress. She looked absolutely amazing.
"You look beautiful," I told her honestly and she smiled at me.
"Compared to you, I'm not even pretty," she chuckled and took my hands. "He's worried about you."
"I know," I answered, walked over to the table and grabbed the letter again. I handed it over to her, and she looked at me for permission. I nodded and she opened it.
I watched as she read through it, and then her eyes met mine again. There was a small tear in the corner of her right eye.
"He's talking about Dean, isn't he?" she asked, handing me the letter back and I nodded.
"I don't even remember that," I laughed before letting out a sigh. "I love him, you know. With all my heart."
"I know you do," she smiled at me as she carefully lifted the veil and attached it to my head. "And he's lucky to have you. But there's something missing."
She said the last part as she looked at me, and I wondered what she meant. What was missing?
I saw her reach her hands back, and then she unclasped her necklace.
"I can't take that," I argued when she locked it around my neck. I had never once seen it off her neck. It was always there. "It's beautiful, but I can't. It's yours."
"My mother gave this to me, to give to my daughter, as her mother gave it to her. And I consider you my daughter."
"But you have..." I tried to argue but she shushed me.
"I want you to have this, so please, just accept it. It suits you. And I had you long before I had April."
I turned around to look at myself in the full body mirror again. My eyes wandered from my veil to the pendant around my neck, smiling when I saw it. It was a very simple necklace, just a silver chain. But hanging from it was a pearl, in the form of a tear drop. It was beautiful, and I loved it. I knew right there and then that I would pass this along to my daughter someday, but until that day came, I would never take it off.
"Thank you," I said sincerely, giving her a hug. She hugged me back, and then said she had to get back to her son. I nodded, smiling, and then found my shoes. I knew it was time soon.
Just as I put my other shoe on, my brother came into the room and confirmed what I already knew.
It was time.
Grabbing his arm, I let him lead me out of the tent and I smiled when we rounded the corner. Jenna and Liam were waiting, ready to walk out when it was time. I gave them both a quick hug before my brother turned to me.
"One more thing," he murmured as he pulled down the veil over my face and then kissed me on the cheek. He smiled before he left to find his seat, and I saw Liam grab his sister's arm.
Just I took a deep breath I heard the music start.
It was really time.
DEAN
As I took my place, I glanced at the tree I was standing under. I saw the carved letters, and I smiled as I remembered all too well the day I carved them in there.
It was the day before J.J and I took off to San Francisco, and we took a stroll through the town. Like a goodbye. We stopped at this place, and she laughed when I carved our initials into the tree. She told me I was cheesy, but then she added that "one day, we'll get married right here."
And here we were.
When I proposed, we never even had to think about where we wanted to get married. Woodstock had always been our home, it was where we met, where we fell in love. It was where we grew up. It was home. And this tree, with our initials on it, stood right here.
I looked out over the audience as I heard the music start. Audience was maybe the wrong word. We weren't many people. Family, and our closest friends. Three chairs stood empty in the front row. It was my idea, but J.J didn't decline it. Her parents and her sister were supposed to be here. But they weren't. And this was our way of honoring them.
Looking at the aisle, I wondered why the wrong song was playing. I knew how this was supposed to happen. We had practiced. J.J wanted Jenna as her bridesmaid, but as Liam wasn't here to be my best man, J.J said that she wouldn't have a bridesmaid either.
I knew that J.J was supposed to walk around the corner any second now, with a dress that I had no doubt in my mind was absolutely beautiful, but the wrong song was playing. And when someone rounded the corner, it wasn't my bride to be.
It was Jenna. My eyes didn't even linger on her as they went to the man beside her. The man with the ashy blonde hair and the army uniform.
Liam.
What the hell was he doing here? He said he couldn't make it. The last time we heard anything from him, he said he was sent out on a mission. Time to fly, he said, not allowed to tell us any more. We thought was was injured, or maybe even dead.
But he was here. And he was walking down the aisle with his sister. He was alive. And I was going to force him to stand up here with me if I had to.
"Don't you look handsome," he said when he was close enough and I took a step forward. I ignored his grin and wrapped my arms around him. Fuck, I hadn't seen him in so long.
He hugged me back, and I don't know for how many moments we stood like that.
"People are gonna think we're gay or something," he commented and I laughed as I leaned out.
"I hate you."
"I love you too, man," he said with a smug grin and turned to stand beside me. "And congratulations, by the way."
The way he said it was different. His tone was different. He wasn't talking about the wedding. He wasn't talking about J.J and I getting married. He knew.
"She told you," I understood and his grin grew wider.
When did she have the time to tell him?
Did she know that he was coming back?
"Shh, turn around and get married," he whispered, his serious expression clearly faked.
But he was right, and I could talk to him about this later. Because the right music was playing, and J.J was walking toward me. My god, was she beautiful. Breathtaking. I could feel my heart racing as her feet took her closer to me, and it felt like forever before she reached for my hand.
"You look amazing," I whispered as she stood before me, and I saw her smile grew wider. She really did look amazing. I had never seen her so beautiful before, but she was always beautiful. And right now she was glowing.
"You look sexy," she whispered back and I chuckled with her.
The priest started to talk then, just as we had practiced. I had heard this before, and therefore I didn't fully listen. Not until he announced that it was time for the vows.
We had agreed to write our own, but I wasn't good with words, and I had struggled with this for over a month. I was confident that J.J's would be perfect, because to her, words came easily.
"You are the most beautiful, smart, talented and generous person I have ever known. You are my best friend, and I am lucky to have you in my life. To have you love me back the same way I love you. And today, right now, I get to give myself to you in marriage. I get to spent the rest of my life as your husband. You and I, we've been through a lot. And today, I promise to encourage and inspire you, to laugh with you, and to comfort you in times of sorrow and struggle. I promise to love you in good times and in bad, when life seems easy, and when it seems hard, when our love is simple, and when it's not. I promise to cherish you, and to always hold you in highest regard. These things I give to you today, and all the days for the rest of our lives. Because Jennie Jacqueline Walker, I will love you forever and always. That I promise you today."
Placing the ring on her finger, I saw her blink a few tears away and I smiled. Maybe it wasn't that bad after all.
Then she turned around to get the ring from Jenna, and when she spoke her voice was shaky. But I still heard every single word that came out of our mouth.
"When I first met you, I had a tiny little crush on you. Eventually it passed, and you became my best friend. Someone to share my life with, someone to tell everything. Someone to share struggle and sorrow with. And then I fell in love with you. Because you, you've always been there for me. I've never had to ask. You know what I want and what I need. You know me. I know you. And it's you that I want, and it's you that I need. My love for you, it's carved into my heart. It's always going to be there. I'm not going anywhere. You inspire me to be the best person I can be. You're my person. My family. And since the first time I saw you, I knew that I wanted to share my life with you. I should know, I did tell my father in a letter when I was seven that I'd marry you someday. And here we are. Together we will create a home, a family. I vow to always love you for who you are, and to grow old by your side as your love and best friend. I vow to always be honest, caring and truthful. I vow to laugh with you, and cry with you. I vow to always love you, and to spend the rest of my life with you. This I vow to you today, because Dean, when I'm by your side, I'm right where I belong."
Feeling the ring on my finger felt completely right, almost like something had been missing there for every day of my life. But now it was there, and it felt good. I felt complete, almost. In just a few moments, this woman in front of me would officially be my wife. We had a baby on the way. I had a steady job – a job that I loved – and J.J was perfectly happy with her career as a photographer. I had everything I'd ever want. And it felt really good.
The priest finally announced that it was time for the kiss, and I heard a round of laughter as I attacked my wife's lips. My mouth weren't gentle on hers, but she didn't seem to object as she kissed me back. But we had to let go all to soon, and I barely had the time to take a good look at her before I felt Liam's hand on my shoulder, and then people started to applaud.
After a good hug from pretty much everyone, it was time for the pictures. Some people stayed, and some left to get the party ready. Jenna and Liam both stayed behind, but I didn't have the time to talk to any one of them. I was pretty busy with basking in the feeling of being a husband, of having a wife. Of having my best friend as my wife.
J.J had insisted on taking the pictures herself, and I don't know how she did it, but she did. A couple of moments later, the took a quick scan through the camera and then handed it to Jenna. Something about seeing them at the party was said, and then we were alone. At least. Well, almost. Pretty much everyone we passed in town could see us where we stood at the end of the fire truck, J.J secured between me and the metal.
Apparently it was some kind of tradition for the bride and groom to hold onto the truck when a fire fighter got married, and my knuckleheads for co workers had actually driven here from San Francisco in one of the trucks. Chiefs idea apparently.
But even though we could be seen all over town, I didn't hesitate in letting my lips brush against my wife's for the biggest part of the ride.
"You okay, Mrs. Walker Campbell?" I asked, basking in the sound of the addition to her name. I liked it far too much, and I couldn't help but smile despite the seriousness of the question.
She got a letter from her Dad, today, and it couldn't be easy for her. She already missed him, and her mom and her sister so much, and getting a letter today had to hurt.
"I'm fine, Dean," she assured me with a soft smile. "And it's Mrs. Campbell, by the way."
"You sure?" I asked, surprised. I didn't even ask her why when she told me she wanted to keep her name, because I knew the answer. It was obvious.
"Yeah," she gave me a slight nod and a genuine smile. "Our kid's gonna be a Campbell."
My hand went to her stomach without me really having a choice and I smiled into the crook of her neck. "Did you tell Liam about that?"
"He figured it out. Sort of." I waited for her to continue, and she eventually did. She was rambling on quickly, something she only did when she was nervous about my reaction. "I told him, okay? But only because he thought I had my boobs fixed, and I know we said we weren't supposed to tell anyone yet, but I had to. And for a second there, I thought he was gonna cry or something."
Despite everything she had just said – or because of it – I burst out laughing and she joined me after a few short moments. She was scared that I wouldn't be okay with the fact that Liam knew. That my best friend knew. Sure, not even Mom knew yet, but Liam was first to know everything. First to know about me being in love with her, first to know about us breaking up, first to know about us getting back together, first to know that I had plans to propose. It made sense that he was first to know this too.
I wanted to continue the conversation, but our time on the truck was about to end as we stopped outside of the old warehouse were the party would be. It hadn't been an actual warehouse for a long time, and as long as I could remember, this was the place to rent if you wanted to fit a whole lot of people into one room. And even though we wouldn't be all that many, it would be perfect.
Everyone was already inside as we entered, and we were quickly rushed onto the dance floor. I wasn't really good at this, and I had forced mom to teach me. At least I knew how to move, but I had no idea how it looked like. I didn't really care either.
"Did I tell you that you look beautiful?"
"I think you did," J.J smiled up at me, and I felt myself smiling with her as my lips found hers. We moved slowly around the dance floor, and as the song was over, Daniel tapped on my shoulder.
"Can I borrow my sister?"
"As long as I get her back," I joked and I heard him laugh as he grabbed J.J's hand. I on the other hand found my mother, leading her onto the dance floor without really asking if she wanted to dance. I knew she'd want to.
"How long?" she asked as we started to dance, and I looked at her with raised eyebrows. What did she mean? "Jennie. How far along is she?"
She knew? How could she know? How could all of a sudden everyone know? This was supposed to be a secret, just between the two of us.
"She is pregnant, right?" she asked then, hesitantly. So she wasn't sure. She just guessed. It was a very good guess though, but as I didn't speak she started to panic. "I'm so sorry, honey. I just thought... I had this feeling, and..."
"Twelve weeks," I cut her off. She was worried that she had somewhat offended me, and I couldn't have that. So I might as well tell her. J.J told Liam, so I could tell my Mom. And technically, she already knew. "No one was supposed to know just yet."
Mom could keep her mouth shut, I knew that. She wouldn't tell anyone. Not even Keith, not now that she knew that we hadn't planned to tell people yet. So I saw her nod, a smile on her face, and then out of nowhere came the tears.
"Don't cry," I pleaded. I couldn't have her cry.
"I'm sorry," she apologized, blinking her tears away. "It's just so much. It feels like you went to college just yesterday. You're married now. And you're having a baby. My baby is having a baby."
More tears ran down her face and I looked over her head to make sure no one had heard her. J.J was still dancing with her brother, Keith with April, and Liam with Jenna. No one else was close enough to hear. So I focused on Mom again.
"I'm not a kid anymore."
"No, you're the man I always knew you'd grow up to be. Better than him."
When I finally got around to dance with J.J again, it was hours later. After the food, and the cake and some games that was actually kind of fun. I would be mocked forever by the guys for having J.J beating me, but it was okay.
"I hear your Mom knows," she smiled up at me and I chuckled without really knowing why.
"She guessed," I explained and she laughed with me. "This is harder to keep a secret than I thought it would be."
"There's still a lot of people to tell. Our friends, our family," she continued to talk, but her words got blurred out when I noticed someone in the corner of the room. Someone who shouldn't be here. "Dean?"
"I'll be right back," I promised, placed a chaste kiss on her lips and turned around. I didn't want to make a scene, because I knew there would be one, so I dragged the man with me outside and didn't even talk to him until we were far enough away to not be overheard.
"What are you doing here, John?"
"My son is getting married, why shouldn't I be here?"
"Look," I said as I put my hands in my pockets. "Mom always told me that it was my decision if I wanted you in my life. And then you stomped in, and I thought I made it clear that I didn't want you in my life. Everyone told me that now, when I had seen you, met you, I might change my mind. I still haven't. This is one of the biggest days in my life, and I don't want you here. I don't need you here."
"I'm your father."
"You might be my father, but you will never be my Dad."
I knew my words were harsh, but they were the truth. I didn't want him in my life, and I certainly didn't need him in my life. Everyone I loved was here. And he wasn't one of them. I still felt the same way about John Winchester as I always had.
"I think you're making a mistake, Dean."
"Look, you made the mistake, and you're trying to fix it. I get it, but I think you should stop trying. Because I know I'm not making a mistake here. This is one of the biggest days in my life, and I'm sorry to say it, but you don't deserve to be here. You said once that you didn't want me, so why can't I say now that I don't want you? Why is it okay for a parent to not want a child, but not okay for a child not to want their parent all of a sudden? I'm sure that maybe deep down you're a good man, because Mom did love you once, but everyone I love is in there. So you should just leave, okay?"
I turned around before he could say anything else, and when I opened the door again I saw Liam and J.J standing in the entrance, waiting for me.
"You okay man?" he asked, and I nodded. I was okay, I truly was. "Good, because I've got bad news. I have a flight to catch, really soon."
"You're leaving again," I realized, knowing I wouldn't see him again for months.
"I'll be back before you know it," he said, and then he turned to J.J, placing a hand on her stomach."And you, don't you dare plop out before I'm back."
J.J laughed as she gave him a hug, and then reached into her bra for something that she handed him. I watched with an amused smile and questioning eyes as he accepted whatever she gave him.
"Something borrowed," she explained, her smile sad. She was already worried, but so was I.
Liam turned back to me then, putting on his poker face. He always did that when he tried to hide what he really felt. But I knew anyway. I had known him for too long not to know.
"Don't you dare say anything, because saying goodbye to Jenna was already hard enough," he gave me a quick hug before he left without looking back. Liam had always been good at entrances, but he had never been good at saying goodbye. It just wasn't who he was. He hated it. And when it came to saying goodbye to him, I hated it just as much.
I felt J.J's arm snake around my waist then and I wrapped my arm around her shoulder, pulling her close as she leaned into my side.
"He'll be fine," she said, trying to convince both of us. I knew that he would be okay, but I was still worried. I would be worried for as long as he was there, for as long as he wasn't on our ground. I needed him in my life. J.J needed him, and Jenna needed him. Our child needed his or hers godfather to be alive and well.
"We'll be fine too," I whispered to her, pressing my lips against her softly. "All three of us."