Hiya! I'm back! (waving arms dramatically) Thank you so much for all your kind words and encouraging reviews! They keep me writing!

I'm glad I didn't mess up the elf thing in chappie 6. As a matter of fact, Santa does have his little "helpers" here too, although they look like tiny little copies of himself. They are called "tomtenissar". Others, they don't seem at all that different from the elves, judging from what you've told me. Hey, you're not the only ones here learning about another culture! ;)

Disclaimer: Jag äger inte de kampsportutövande sköldpaddorna. I don't own Pokemon either.

Chapter 7: The Foot Attacks!

Donny nearly jumped out of his shell when he suddenly found himself surrounded by several figures all clad in black. They would've looked pretty threatening, if it wasn't for those huge yellow eyes that sort of took the dramatic effect away and instead made them look like gigantic, yellow-eyed, tail-less tarsiers.

"Hej," (1) Don said. "Ni ser ut som jättestora, gulögda, svanslösa spökdjur." (2)

Foot ninja number one tilted his head to the side and turned to one of his companions. "What's he saying, Billy-Jill?"

"I have no idea, Jimmy-Jean," answered his friend and scratched his head.

"Does it matter?" asked a ninja called Bobby-Jane impatiently. "I want to beat him up!"

"It might be a new secret weapon of theirs," another ninja said warily. "They want to give us a feeling of false security by speaking funnily, and then BAM! they dive in for the kill."

Jimmy-Jean raised an eyebrow. "Pauley-Sue?"

"Yeah?"

"That's got to be the stupidest thing I've ever heard."

"Can we take this discussion some other time?" snapped a guy called Minnie-Lou. "We have other things to take care of for the moment!"

"You're right," Jimmy-Jean said determinately. "Billy-Jill, Bobby-Jane, Pauley-Sue, Minnie-Lou, Julie-Anne and Andrew, ATTACK!"

Donny had been following the conversation with interest. Now, when the seven Foot members closed in on him with their weapons drawn, his eyes widened and he took a step back. He started to feel pretty nervous. "Eh, killar, ta det lite lugnt nu. Jag menade inte det där om spökdjuren… Jag är säker på att vi kan prata om det här…" (3)

All of a sudden, Minnie-Lou pounced. Don just got the time to hide behind a garbage can. Minnie-Lou crashed into it. For a moment, he was splattered up against it, but then he slid down to the ground.

"Minnie-Lou!" Bobby-Jane's eyes narrowed. He threw himself over the garbage can, but Don held up the lid in the last moment and the ninja got smacked in the face. He smiled a goofy grin and showed eight broken teeth. "Oh… look at the cute little birdies…"

"Told you that they'd switched tactics," said Pauley-Sue.

"No, you didn't," Julie-Anne corrected him. "You said that it was their new secret weapon to speak funnily and –"

"Never mind the details," Pauley-Sue snapped. "I almost said it."

"Whatever."

It actually seemed like the turtle was winning the fight. He took the foot soldiers out one by one – either by sheer luck or by accident (well, to be honest, it might have gone better for the ninjas if they'd been more focused on training than trading Pokemon cards. Geez, that made me sound like Leo…). Jimmy-Jean and Julie-Anne crashed into each other when they made a dive for Don at the same time. They would've succeeded, if he hadn't tripped over a homeless cat, that happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time, and fallen to the ground. When he tried to get up, he got entangled in the coat and had serious problem getting out of it. While stumbling around, his shell accidentally hit Billy-Jill's solar plexus and the Foot bended over in pain. By this time, Pauley-Sue and Andrew had come to the conclusion that the turtles might have abandoned ninjitsu and tried out some new freaky fighting style, so they decided to get the heck outta there. Before they left, however, Pauley-Sue hurried to put the little bug on Donny's shell when he wasn't looking, choosing a spot where the carapace met his shoulder. Then, the two ninjas ran as if the Devil himself – or maybe the Shredder – was after them.

Don finally got out of the coat and looked around, studying the five knocked out Foot soldiers. He smiled proudly against no one in particular, dusted his hands off, and said: "Ha! Där ser ni vad som händer om man muckar med mig, den otrolige… öh… tja…" (4) He scratched his head. "Jag har visst glömt vad jag heter." (5)

Leo, Mikey and Raph were hurrying over the rooftops in an, until now, fruitless search for their brother. They had decided not to split up after what happened to Leo in the sewers. Suddenly, Leo (who was in the lead as usual) ran straight into Pauley-Sue and they both fell to the ground, just like a cloud doesn't do. Before any of the turtles could react, Pauley-Sue had come to his feet again and joined Andrew. They looked like frightened rabbits as they stared at the turtles.

Leo rose, and Raph took a step forward. The two humans put their hands up, as if to protect their faces. "NO! PLEASE DON'T HURT US!"

The three turtles blinked. This wasn't normal Foot behaviour. "…What…?"

"Let us go! Please leave us alone!" Pauley-Sue begged.

"We'll give you anything!" Andrew looked quite desperate. "You'll even get our best Pokemon cards! Just don't use that new fighting style on us!"

Mikey brightened. "You've got Pokemon cards? That's cool! Is there, by any reason, a Tentacruel available? Haven't got that one in my collection…"

"Of course!" Andrew pulled out a Tentacruel card out of nowhere. "I've got an Electabuzz and an Aerodactyl too!"

"Wicked! I think –"

"Shut it, Mikey!" Leo interrupted. He turned to the Foot soldiers. "What exactly do you mean by 'that new fighting style'?"

"Oh, you know," Andrew said warily.

"No, I don't know."

"Speak up!" Raphael barked. "Now! Or I'll use these sais ta make shish-kabobs out of ya!"

"We'll talk! We'll talk!" Pauley-Sue yelped, and then started speaking extremely fast. "We-met-the-fourth-turtle-in-the-alley-and-he-first-spoke-funnily-and-then-he-beat-the-heck-out-of-us-using-garbage-cans-and-stuff-and-he-took-the-others-down-and-we-ran-for-our-lives-so-that-he-wouldn't-turn-us-into-dog-food."

It took a few seconds for the information to sink in, then the turtles' eyes widened.

"… Donny?" Mikey said doubtfully.

"Guess he isn't as defenceless as we thought." Leonardo raised an eye ridge.

"Well, that's good," Raph said. "There might be some of the ol' Donny left in 'im."

"Where did this happen?" Leo asked Andrew and Pauley-Sue.

"Three alleys from here," they answered and pointed.

"Let's go, brothers!" Leo shouted, and the three sane members of the TMNT were off. Pauley-Sue and Andrew sighed relieved.

"Thank the Lord that they let us get away," Pauley-Sue said.

"Yeah. I seriously thought that they'd throw a couple of garbage cans at us."

"What are we gonna say to the Master?"

"Well, we cannot tell him the truth…"

"Why not? He's insane anyway, he won't gave a darn whether we got our butts kicked or not."

"You might be right, but I'd like to remain on the side of caution."

"How about we compromise? We'll tell him the truth, but spice it up a little, if you get my point…"

"I like the way you think, Pauley-Sue."

The two Foot soldiers took off for Oroku Saki's skyscraper.

Leo, Raph and Mikey landed in the alley, not making a sound. Don was still left, trying to remember his identity (the clumsy fool had not only forgotten his real name, but also that of 'Master Splinter' in the heat of battle). He brightened when he spotted them.

"Åh, hallå där! Jag började undra vad det hade blivit av er. Själv har jag klarat mig fint – jag slog ner alla dom här typerna alldeles själv!" (6) He gestured to the unconscious ninjas proudly. "Förresten, ni råkar inte minnas vad jag heter?" (7)

"… Donatello?" Leo started with a gaping mouth. He and his two youngest brothers looked around the alley, dumbstruck.

"Donatello? Är det mitt namn?" (8) Don's eyes narrowed. "Tja, det låter inte så tokigt när man tänker på det. Donatello. Don-atello. Dona-tello." (9) He 'tasted' the word on his tongue, as if trying to find out how it felt.

While Donwas behavingchildish, his brothers investigated the place and tried to figure out what the shell had happened.

"What the shell happened?" Raph exclaimed.

Mikey turned to Don. "Splinter, care to explain?"

"Smart, Mike." Raph rolled his eyes. "What makes you think that he'd understand?"

"As a matter of fact, he didn't even seem to react when you called him 'Splinter'," Leo said. He waved to gain Don's attention. The turtle in question looked at him. "Master Splinter?" the blue-clad turtle tried.

Don shook his head. "Nej, Donatello," (10) he said and pointed to himself. "Donatello. Vad heter du själv?" (11)

"He remembers his name!" The three turtles lightened up like three Christmas trees.

"Do you think he remembers ours?" Mikey asked eagerly.

"If not, we just have to remind him," Leo said and pointed to himself. "Leonardo."

"Leonardo," mimicked Don. (AN: I won't give that a number, seems pretty unnecessary, don't you think?)

"Raphael," Raph said.

"Raphael." Don didn't pronounce it correctly, but you still could understand what he said.

"Michelangelo."

"Michelangelo." The pronunciation wasn't the right one here either, but you could clearly hear what he meant. He frowned. "Var har jag hört de namnen förut?... Konstnärer! Just det! Renässanskonstnärer, eller hur?" (12)

His three brothers caught the similarity between the words of 'renässans' and 'renaissance', so they just smiled and nodded. Maybe Don was on his way to get his memory back… but only maybe.

"And we fought bravely, Master, but suddenly, the turtle pulled out his laser gun and started to shoot wildly around him. It was horrible! We were the only survivors… We did put the bug on him, though, before we decided on a strategic retreat."

Andrew and Pauley-Sue were on their knees before their Master Oroku Saki. They'd been telling the truth, but 'spiced it up a little'. Right now, their boss seemed pretty mad.

"So, you say he had a laser gun?"

The two soldiers nodded.

"How come I never get any cool gadgets like that? I want a laser gun too!" Shredder pouted. "But no, all I get is a bunch of incompetent fools that cannot even survive without messing up!" He lightened up. "STOCKMAN!"

Baxter Stockman rolled in in his wheelchair. "What is it?"

"I want you to invent a laser gun for me for Christmas!" Saki said. "And I want a pony too, and a Silver Sentry action figure and a magic carpet and a castle and a blue wig and a werewolf and…"

"Deja-vu," Pauley-Sue whispered. Andrew nodded.

"… but of course," Saki finished, "don't tell me about it. I want it to be a surprise." He smiled against Stockman.

I know that the Foot ninjas got… well… weird names. I got the inspiration from Marian Keyes' book Rachel's Holiday. I hope that none of you got offended, it's just for fun. And the fact that they got girl names does not have to mean that they're transvestites in their free time. Not that I have anything against transvestites…

I've had no contact with Pokemon whatsoever for several years. I got their names by visiting their official website.

As I've told you before, if you have ideas or suggestions for this story, feel free to tell me!

1. Hello.

2. You look like gigantic, yellow-eyed, tail-less tarsiers.

3. Eh, guys, take it a little easy now. I didn't mean what I said about the tarsiers… I am sure we can talk this out…

4. Ha! That's what happens if you mess with me, the incredible… eh… well…

5. I seem to have forgotten my name.

6. Oh, hello there! I was starting to wonder what had happened to you. I've managed fine – I knocked all these types out all by myself!

7. By the way, you don't happen to remember my name?

8. Donatello? Is that my name?

9. Well, it doesn't sound so weird when you think about it. Donatello. Don-atello. Dona-tello.

10. No, Donatello.

11.Donatello. What's your name?

12. Where have I heard those names before?... Artists! That's it! Renaissance artists, am I right?