A/N: Okay, guys, I know it was a hard finale to watch, and that most of us feel a little heartbroken, but I'm still optimistic, and I will be optimistic. I won't give you a whole lot of reasons here, but I suggest you check the last line of my profile where I've posted a link to the best post on all this by LoveEpicLove. Really great reasoning.

This chapter is rather angsty. I wrote most of it before the finale, thankfully, or I wouldn't have been able to get it written. I'm only asking you to remember: this is a Delena fic, and even though they will have hard times, they always survive.

Special thanks: to CreepingMuse, of course. I'll be forever grateful for the day you published "Consumed" and the day I came across a familiar nickname on the list of beta readers. ;) Guys, check out her awesome new one-shot "The Boy in Gray" – s/8099430.

Can you forgive me again?

I don't know what I said,

But I didn't mean to hurt you.

~ Evanescence, "Forgive Me" ~

Damon looked at the glass in his hand. It was already getting dark, and he hadn't even finished one bottle yet – whiskey didn't help him anymore; nothing really did. It didn't restrain the irrational jealousy that had gripped him since the moment Elena had forgiven Stefan a few hours before. Nor could it remove the emptiness he was feeling even now.

Undoubtedly, he was happy that Stefan seemed to be back. Damon knew better than anyone that there was no real and eternal humanity switch. He knew that Stefan was already returning, he was almost back – he had known it the moment Stefan had confessed he'd saved Klaus to save his brother. If Stefan needed forgiveness, it wouldn't be long until he was completely himself; maybe he already was. But all that had nothing to do with Damon's anger.

His anger had everything to do with Elena.

Truthfully, Damon knew he had no right to judge her, but he couldn't help it. How could she forgive the man who ended her human life? The man who deprived her of the chance to ever have normal family, children? His heart twitched painfully at the thought, but he had to admit she could have chosen a life without anything supernatural, she could have decided to cut both Salvatores out of her life and try to be just a regular young girl.

There was another thought, which Damon was ashamed of, but it was the worst of it all. He remembered that Elena had never forgiven him this easily. But now that Stefan came to apologize after he'd killed her, she forgave him the moment he asked for it? He'd gotten his revenge on Klaus at her expense, and Elena wasn't even mad? But of course, why was he even surprised? "It's Stefan we're talking about." "It will always be Stefan." He could quote her endlessly, every word more painful than a stake in the gut.

Damon let out a joyless laugh. So, he was right not to get his hopes up too high – obviously, Elena wasn't in her right mind this whole day. She had touched him, kissed him, and foolish as he was, he had allowed himself to believe it meant something. Well, it did – Elena wanted him, that much was clear, but Damon knew it anyway, had known for a while. She had shown she trusted him enough to let him sleep by her side, that she trusted him with her life – but it had all happened just because her boyfriend had been gone. Even now, it was all about Stefan.

How had he allowed this to happen, anyway? How could he let one girl torture him that fucking much?

It didn't help that Damon heard the girl in question approaching his room and then, in a while, knock lightly on the door.

"Come in," he said, bracing himself. There was nothing more frightening in the world than Elena Gilbert.

Elena stopped before the door, knowing very well that Damon could hear her, but she couldn't bring herself to open it and face him in his current state of mind. She had been debating with herself all this time, trying to figure out whether it was best to go see him now or to let him cool off and talk to him when he was in a better mood.

Then she'd cursed herself for being so stupid. In a better mood? When did Damon ever cool off? They needed to talk it out, for both their sake.

Elena's resolve subsided a little when she thought of what Damon was like when he was upset. She was almost afraid to talk to him, but then she remembered the cold, indifferent voice he'd used with her a couple of hours ago. Elena was willing to let him shout at her, break bottles and glasses, destroy half the house, as long as it meant that he cared. If Damon wasn't there for her, Elena didn't know if she could go through everything she had to deal with. Sometimes, the knowledge that he cared was the only thing that helped her get through the day.

She knocked on the door, and felt an uneasy emptiness in her stomach when she heard his cold "Come in." Elena entered the room quietly and found him on the bed with a glass of whiskey in his hand.

"Is there anything I can do for you, Elena?" he asked, his gaze fixed on the glass. Apparently, her suspicions were right – he didn't seem any calmer. Even if his voice was even and controlled, she knew Damon well enough to see that he was seething on the inside.

"We need to talk," she said pleadingly, sitting beside him, and Damon finally looked at her. His eyes looked more steely than blue. She wasn't sure if she was ready to have this conversation, but Damon was hurting because of what she had done, and Elena knew she had to fix it somehow – anyhow.

"Fine. Talk," he said.

"Don't be like this," she asked, and Damon let out a strained laugh.

"Like what? Like the guy you run to when you need something and ditch when everything's all right? Who's always wrong no matter what he does? Who you expect to live for you because he's stupid and can't help loving you?"

"I don't-" she started, but he interrupted her.

"Cut it out, Elena. Apparently, my holy brother can't hurt you enough. Damn, he killed you yesterday, and you're already running back into his arms?"

Elena was relieved to hear his voice – angry, disappointed, but at least not indifferent. She shifted closer, and was glad when he didn't move away.

"It's not like that, Damon. I didn't forgive Stefan so we could be together again. I just… needed to forgive him, I needed him to be all right. I couldn't stand the thought of-"

"…hurting Stefan," he interrupted, shoving away her hand when she tried to put it on his shoulder. "He's obviously the only one you don't want to hurt, isn't he?"

"Damon, I know you're mad at me, but I don't know what to do for you to forgive me, because I just… I don't understand what makes you this angry. Are you…" she hesitated for a few moments, "…jealous? Do you think that I'll return to Stefan after everything? Is that what it's all about?"

Damon shook his head, narrowing his eyes.

"I don't get to be jealous. You aren't mine, Elena, and you never were."

She tried to speak, but Damon didn't let her.

"I'm not mad because you forgave Stefan. I'm mad because no matter what he does, he deserves more than I do. Why does he get your forgiveness the moment he asks for it? Why does it always take a near-death experience for you to forgive me?"

The realization hit Elena like a freight train. Once Damon had forced her to drink his blood, but he hadn't been trying to challenge or get revenge on anyone, unlike Stefan. He'd had only one selfish reason: he wanted Elena to be alive. He couldn't stand the thought of losing her. And when he had come to apologize the following day, she had told him she needed time. "Maybe a lot of time," she had said, and he had granted her all the time he'd thought he wouldn't have. He had let her be mad at him for loving her too much to let her go.

"Will you believe me if I say I did it for myself even more than for Stefan?" she asked, cupping his face. This time he didn't move. "He was hurting, I could sense it, and I really felt his pain." When Damon scoffed, she went on before he could say anything. "But that pain has nothing on what I feel now that I hurt you. I need you to forgive me, too. Please."

Damon's expression turned from dejected to thoughtful.

"Wait, you're saying you could sense he was in pain? And… that I'm in pain? And you feel it, too?"

Whatever it was that caused his change of mood, Damon wasn't mad any more, and Elena wanted to laugh with delight.

"Yeah?"

"Of course. I'm an idiot."

"What? Why?" Elena was lost again. He wasn't making sense.

"Your heightened senses. When you were human, you were so empathic it was unhealthy. And you always, always wanted everyone but yourself to be happy. Now that you're a vampire, it's not just unhealthy anymore. It's completely insane."

He stated it like it was the most normal thing in the world, and Elena smiled. She finally felt better. This was the Damon she felt good around, who made her want to get closer to him, to hold him and make him believe that hurting him was the last thing she would ever do. She let her hands slide down to his shoulders, looking at him expectantly.

"I should have realized it earlier," he said quietly. "Instead, I made it all about me."

"I'm sorry I made you think that… this day didn't mean anything. Because it did."

"I know," he nodded, and Elena was just about to move closer and give him a hug when he asked another question. "What about Stefan, though?"

She sighed, looking away. How could she answer when she had no idea? She cared about Stefan, a lot, but after what he'd done, she truly didn't know what to do. Her instincts told her that she cared, but that she should stay away from him. Her feelings were a mess, a mixture of love, longing, hurt and confusion. She didn't know how to reconcile these warring parts of her.

The silence was growing loud, and Damon was getting anxious. Why was she still quiet? Was it such a difficult question? For Damon, it was the simplest question ever. You either loved someone, or were in love with someone, or didn't give a shit. Those were the only possible variants of attitude man was capable of.

Elena looked him in the eye, almost like she was trying to compel him to take his question back and pretend that he had never asked it, but he wasn't going to let it go. He could do anything for this woman, he could kill and die for her, but he deserved some answers, and Elena would have to answer this time around.

"I… I don't know, Damon," she shook her head, and he narrowed his eyes, again.

"It took you a whole minute to come up with that evasion? Honestly, Elena, I expected a better excuse."

Her expression turned determined and even a little angry.

"He's important to me. He's the first person I truly loved, and I'll never get over it. If you're expecting me here to tell me that I hate him for what he has done to me, that I'll cut him out of my life and never let him return, it's not gonna happen, because part of me will always love him."

Damon thought of the moment when Mikael was about to rip his heart out of his chest. It had probably hurt a little less.

"Tell me if I got this right, Elena," he said, trying hard not to start shouting again. "You love Stefan, I'm not allowed to give a damn about it, and your need to be around me is completely irrelevant?" He would feel triumphant seeing how nervous she looked now, but he was too angry for that. "What? You thought I didn't notice? You thought I would forget the way you kissed me? Sorry, Elena, but you don't get to walk away now."

He moved a little closer, so there were mere inches separating them now, and she tilted her head, staring at him almost…fearfully? What did she think he was going to do? Tear her clothes to shreds and take her there and then? Hurt her? Did she really think that low of him?

He knew better than that.

"Now that we've established how epic and eternal your love for Stefan is, I need you to answer just one question."

Her eyes dropped to his lips, and her own lips quivered, as if she had already guessed his question, and her eyes begged him to stop, but he didn't show her mercy now.

"What is it that you feel for me, Elena?"

A/N: Yeah, a cliffhanger. I'm looking forward to reading your thoughts, predictions and comments. Hope you enjoyed it and thanks for reading.