First off let me say how incredibly thankful and honoured I am for the reviews and attention this fiction is already garnering. That short little prologue, ( well short for me) has created a lot of attention despite it being so short and I know you all have questions.

So here's a little back story from me quickly...this story is based on real world inspiration. I haven't read any stories of this nature really myself but I am sure some are out there. I don't intend on infringing on anyone elses work but if there are similarities, it just means that our minds were in sync for this type of story.

I, however, am basing this on a student of my own that I had during my brief tenure as a part-time opera instructor. His name was Bradley and he went deaf when he was 10 years old. He had an amazing voice and had come to the Conservatory fully willing and capable of being tutored in operatic studies. He had 13 percent hearing in his right ear and despite his disability was my BEST student. He could feel music but just touching the piano and he could hear himself, not well mind you...but well enough that he could learn and sing along with practised ease.

He taught me that even though his world was almost silent he could still love music and excel at it.

Ironically enough I contacted him before I started this fic to get some insight on how he learned what he did and I found out that he is now a music major, finishing off his undergrad at the University of Toronto, and he's been offered a TA position there when he graduates.

THAT is all the proof I need that this story is my salute to him...one of my long lost students that has taught me that you can love music and "hear" it...even if you can't, because it's a feeling more than anything. Love you Bradley!

Now that being said I will be writing this mostly from Blaine's point of view from now on because you need to feel what its like for him. He can hear...but barely. He can vocalize perfectly but it sounds a little off key and mumbled but that is normal for anyone who's dealing with hearing loss of any kind. If the dialogue is in italics...it's being signed...just so you know.

Read on loves and I hope that you love my salute to my favourite couple and an inspiring young man who gave me the idea for this fic. Love you all!

Disclaimer: I own nothing...as always. But I pretend really well. ;)

Bittersweet Symphony

Lost For Words

(BPOV)

I took up my usual position for the entire recital. Sitting cross legged on the floor just off stage to the left, my palms pressed flat on the polished wood and my eyes tuned in on the mirror above the Grand at centre stage.

I watched with trained eyes as the reflection of my students' fingers flowed over every chord, and every key change. I could feel the vibrations along the floor, and as always I could faintly hear the music...but only a little. The combination of the vibrations along the stage resonating through my hands and the well trained eyes had me only pick out a total of 4 mistakes from both of my students.

After they had both performed they came, as per custom, to sit beside me on the floor to watch the remainder of the performances. All my students throughout the last 2 years marvelled at me when they found out that I was almost completely deaf. They wanted to know what kept me going, and what it was like for me and thus this tradition was born. They would close there eyes and despite them both being able to hear, they would mimic my posture and just feel. It connected me to them in a very real way and I could tell it helped them understand that despite everything, music was something that you had to feel with your soul...not always just hear with your ears.

Candice Yun and Zac Billings were my proteges and I was so glad that they accepted me as not only their teacher and superior but someone they could confide in and trust. Even though I could communicate verbally, I had taught them some sign language because I was definitely not the only deaf person that they would encounter in their lives, so it was always handy to learn.

"What did you think of each others performances?"

I had also found it helpful to let them critique each other. Having a fresh pair of ears and eyes, giving helpful criticisms, especially from their peers, made them more honest I found...and it helped them learn from one another.

Candice had picked up signing really quickly, so she always answered me with full signing and speech, her talents we really unlimited.

"Good actually. I only heard, well saw... 3 mistakes from you Zac...you did really well."

"Actually Candi there were 4...the one you missed was in the first chord...most musicians get caught being nervous before they perform and forget to tone down the enthusiasm right at the beginning."

"Huh...I never thought about it like that."

"You missed you third finger on you right hand...right Zac?"

Zac blushed and lowered his head.

"Caught that did you Mr. A? I swear nothing gets by you."

He was not very good at signing but learned to look right at me when he was talking. Of course lip reading was something of an everyday occurrence with me, but sometimes people spoke to fast and I got lost...hence why I tried to have anyone that I interacted with sign whenever they could. I wanted everyone to relax around me and not put up the " I'm sorry you're deaf, let me talk to you like you're five years old" act. I know that people never meant to be pretentious but I did get tired of the pity routine.

Candice and Zac continued to critique each other for a few minutes and I just listened in as it were...watching them talk carefully and sign where they could. It was nice to have them include me in the conversation despite not verbally including my two cents.

"Okay you two...all of your points about each others performances were correct. Candi you need to make sure you don't read to far ahead in you music...this isn't a race, concentrate on the musical themes in each bar...each segment, and the pace will set it itself. You don't have to be the fastest to be the best at everything, you just need to know your music. And Zac...you need to be more confident in your performances. Those little mistakes weren't from lack of practice...this I know, but more from the fact that you are still second guessing yourself. You are a great pianist, not a student...a pianist. You just need to keep telling yourself that and forget what others tell you. You are both gifted...play to your strengths. We still have some work to do obviously but you guys both did really well, I'm very proud."

I clasped my hands together and they both smiled but nodded along with my assessment.

"Now enough of the teacher stuff...you guys got any big plan for the Thanksgiving long weekend?"

I was their teacher but I was also their friend.

XXXX

Damian was the last to perform, and he didn't disappoint, not in my head anyway. Candi, Zac and I held our positions on stage and watched, felt and listened to the young tenor perform his three selected arias. The kid was a little pompous which wasn't a secret. He had been given nothing but praise since he walked in the door here just over 2 years ago. He was top in his class, got the parts and freedom he loved, and was showcased at every opportunity. He was the silver spoon child, and unfortunately I saw a lot of my younger self in that kid.

I was that young boy who was told on countless occasions that I could become the greatest performer, the best pianist because I was a talent for the ages...but it made me cocky. I had gotten what I wanted all along but if I had just loved music more than performing or being the centre of attention, maybe I could have seen and heard music for what it really was before it was taken away from me. And this kid Damian worried me, because he seemed to he heading down the same path.

Now it wasn't all bad, the kid had talent, but he knew it which was a dangerous combination. He knew that he was being shown off to prospective schools for his graduate degree and what Damian wanted, Damian got apparently. I was a little thankful that I wasn't his immediate teacher. Ms. Logan, the opera head here, and a good friend of mine, had taken this boy under her wing as she gloated about the upcoming star that he was to become. I was all for lighting the spark of talent and hope in my students eyes but I always made them realize that this was a gift that shouldn't be taken likely. Now I'm not one for sad stories or playing the 'whoa is me' card about my dream being thwarted, but Damian worried me because everything came too easily to him and Ms. Logan, well Barbara, was charged with trying to keep his ego in check and yet still allowing him to grow as a performer. I did not envy her job. After his performance was complete she praised him as always but he seemed to shrug off the criticisms that she tried to make. They parted ways, Damian with his head held high, and Barb sighing and rubbing the bridge of her nose in exhaustion.

XXXX

It was only now as the theatre emptied, save a few stragglers and families, that I said my good byes to my kids. I only tutored these two students closely while I TA'ed one class twice a week. So when I parted ways with the kids, I wasn't going to see them for another week and a half because they usually only saw me on Thursdays and Fridays, which were the upcoming holidays. I reminded them to practice what we went over this week before reconvening in two weeks, and to above all enjoy the much needed time off once their other classes were over next week.

I was packing up when I barely heard the very upset tones from Barbara and a man who's voice I didn't recognize. I faintly caught the discussion, and when I turned myself around I was met with a sight so beautiful that I had to hold back a gasp.

A man, draped in a ridiculously well tailored grey suit, hair coiffed gently and standing very tall next to Barbara, whom was obviously not liking their conversation one bit. Despite the heated way Barb was responding, the man kept his composure and a slight look of arrogance as he heatedly made his point.

Barb was obviously ticked off at this point and shook the man's hand and walked off the stage, huffing probably, her jaw set in an angry scowl. God I knew that look.

I snickered at her childish behaviour towards the mystery man and turned back to the sheet music I was collecting on the Grand when someone tapped me on the shoulder.

Despite being able to hear small amounts when I trained my hearing aid in the right direction people could still sneak up on me, and this was no exception. The tap on my shoulder made me jump and I dropped some of the sheet music on the floor.

I muttered my apologies as I went to pick up the music, but as I crouched down I could see this man on his knees beside me talking down to the ground, gathering up the music that I had dropped for me.

He lifted his head mid speech, and I could have added mute to the list of ailments I was suffering from at this moment. His eyes were a piercing blue, or was it green, either way it complimented his pale skin, and strong jaw and I was completely incapable of speech at this moment.

The man was beautiful, and god I wish he would slow down when he was talking because I couldn't read a thing that he was saying.

I don't know where the boldness came from but I reached out an grabbed both of his wrists which made him stop talking and look at my hands where they held his wrists and then to my eyes before I attempted to speak. He smiled the tiniest smile that could have melted my heart right then and there.

"T-Thank you." Wow I stutter now too...this guy must think I'm an idiot.

The man starting speaking again and I could only pick out a few words like "Sorry about the argument...here for Damian...sorry...making you drop...teacher?"

Huh...okay this guy was rambling so fast it seemed like he was nervous talking to me, and from the curve of his obviously full upper lip I could tell that his voice had a small lisp which I'm sure was really cute if I could hear him better. Wait did he just ask me a question?

The man was still knelt in his sinfully tailored suit beside me and his eyebrows had gone from amused to furrowed.

"What?"

He looked at me this time when he said that.

"Sorry...I have to go. Thanks for the uh...help."

I gathered the remainder of the sheet music and without another look at the beautiful yet familiar man I ran out of the auditorium and straight to my office, where I collapsed in my chair, before thumping my forehead on the desk.

After a few minutes passed the small red light on my desk blinked, notifying me someone was at my door, and I shouted for them to enter without lifting my head to see who it was, I already knew.

It was Barb, looking a little less mad then when she left the auditorium not 10 minutes ago. She signed her greetings and closed the door behind her.

"Blaine, you okay honey?"

"I could ask you the same thing...that looked like a pretty heated argument, and don't bother signing Barb, I can read for now. Thanks though"

Barb sat down in the chair beside me, smiling warmly, and tried to focus on the words...I felt too tired suddenly to sign too.

"God I swear my business gets more and more full of divas every second. I mean the nerve of that guy...just because he's famous, doesn't give him the right to all but bash Damian."

"Say that again Barb...and slow it down for a sec...who's famous?"

"That guy, the one I was talking to...it's Kurt Hummel, Mr. Know it All Julliard. He's kind of famous in the opera community so I wouldn't expect you to..."

"Handel's Messiah"

"What?"

"Handel's Messiah...Kurt Hummel, student and teacher at Julliard. He starred in the Messiah 3 yeas ago at the Met. That was the last performance I heard... Oh my god I'm such an ass!"

I thumped my head back on the desk again before lifting it up to see the plump woman laughing at me. Her laughter was something that I could always recognize, even with my condition, it was loud and from the heart, and as much as I loved hearing it, the fact that it was happening because of my idiocy, made me cringe.

"Oh honey...you're a fan? I never knew you loved opera?"

I looked back up laughing myself a little now.

"Of course I do. It's beautiful. I've always loved it but I could never sing like that. I went with Tyler to the opera all the time in college, that's where I saw Mr. Hummel perform. He was amazing. I knew he looked familiar."

"Okay but that doesn't explain why you are an ass?"

"After you guys had your argument, I guess you could say he noticed me in the vicinity and I don't know why but he came over to talk to me. Well he tapped me on the shoulder and scared the bejesus out of me and I dropped all my sheet music."

Barb was trying to hold back a snicker or two as I continued.

"Not funny Barb. Well he helped me picked up the papers and he was talking so fast that I couldn't hear him at all and his lips were moving so fast that I couldn't read them and well...I may have ogled him a little too much and muttered something that resembled a thank you before running out the door. I'm just glad that I didn't recognize him off the bat or I may have made an even bigger fool out of myself in front of him."

Barb was smiling so large at this point that she resembled the Cheshire cat.

"Blaine...that has to be the first time I have seen you blush about any guy since I met you. But trust me you don't want Kurt Hummel around, he's a prick."

"What, how can you say that?"

"Well firstly his reputation around my musical circle is infamous. Perfectionist bitch is a term that comes up quite often. Well that reputation did proceed him but he proved it right down to the last pompous stereotype about Julliard. He came up to me after the performance to discuss Damian's performance, and his possible future as a graduate at Julliard. I was expecting Sean to come but the fact that he sent Kurt was an interesting choice. Sean's always been very cautious about who he sends to scout but I guess Kurt being a countertenor... he would have a knack for Damian's talent. Well Kurt basically told me that I needed to get my ears checked. That Damian was par at best, and that he may want to continue his education here instead of Julliard because he may not be the 'right fit'. As you no doubt saw, I lost it."

I sat there trying to figure out the conundrum that was Kurt Hummel. That perfectly sweet and gorgeous man that helped me and risked ruining a very expensive suit to do so, could be so snobby towards a talent as gifted as Damian. Now I had to agree with the attitude adjustment part of that assessment but that didn't mean that I thought Damian wasn't talented enough for Julliard. In fact maybe a tougher regiment of teaching would be good for him, but Kurt said no?

"So...what I got from that is...Kurt Hummel is a diva of the worst kind and Damain lost his chance because of said diva. And you went mother hen on him because...I'm sorry to say you are a little too protective of that kid you know that right?"

"I know, but Damian has something wonderful Blaine. Even though he thinks he shits gold, oh yeah I know of his ego, he's still a boy Blaine. And Kurt being the young protege that he was, should have seen that in Damian. I expected more from Kurt honestly and his disappointed me, so I let him have it. I can be a bitch too ya know?"

"Ha ha ha this I know. So have you told Damian yet that his application is being thrown out?"

"No because, because it hasn't and I don't want the kid to stop trying. He needs to know that their will be people that say no to him, but I want him to fight for it. I can't hold his hand all the time. I want him to follow through with his applications without the knowledge that he hasn't impressed the faculty. Whether he gets rejected or gets another chance to prove himself, this is his show, and I'm not doing anymore for him except pushing him out the door at his future. He needs to learn things for himself."

I smiled, bringing my hands through my hair, " It's times like this that I can see why I love teaching here. We're all an odd group of instructors but deep down we love our kids...even if they can be serious pains in the asses."

"You're telling me! At least you're kids love you, most of mine are born divas , nature of the beast I'm afraid. But Damian's a good kid Blaine, he is spoiled rotten but under there he reminds me a lot of you when you went to school here."

Barb was the first teacher I had met when I was schooling here that wasn't my immediate superior. She saw my cocky attitude for what it was...a mask. She was one of the few that treated me no differently than any other student and up until this day I thanked her for that humility, and for her friendship. She was still there for me when I went deaf, and was te one who wrote me the letter of recommendation to the Dean to get me hired here as an assistant part time teacher, and now a partial department head.

"I know...that's what scares me Barb."

"He'll get the kick in the pants he needs one day Blaine. I just hope he realizes his gift as just that...a gift before he pisses off the wrong people. But let's get back to the point at hand..."

I cocked my eyebrow at her, as a devilish smile crossed her face.

"So you made an ass of yourself in front of Kurt?" I groaned as I knew where this was going. " I never guessed he would be your type Blaine."

"Oh god...if we're gonna have this discussion can we at least do it over a beer?"

"Sure...it's not a school night and I would love to ear more about you new infatuation with Mr. Hummel."

"God Barb I only met him for a second, will you lay off...maybe I'll need a couple beers."

After gathering our coats we both walked arm in arm to the pub across he street for our usual Friday night "teachers conference."

XXXX

(KPOV)

"He was just kinda of lack luster Sean, not my fault that he was just mediocre." I adjusted my collar on my coat as I left the building but kept my ear trained on Sean on the other end of the phone.

"Kurt, this is why I don't send you to these things often, you think everyone is sub par."

"That's not true! I thought Katie was brilliant and I told her as much and now she's one of the schools top 5 students in her program."

"Katie is an exception Kurt, why do you sound so flustered over this? Damian still gets an audition here you know that, so don't write him off. I trust your judgement Kurt but you've got to lay off and remember that these kids are just that kids and they aren't going to be perfect, we just have to recognize potential."

I huffed because I knew that Sean was right and that maybe I was a little harsh with Ms. Logan or whatever her name was.

"I know...I just want what's best for the school."

"Kurt, remember it's what's best for the kids and not the school. Our reputation is solid and you know it, you've go to remember to stop being such a diva and let someone else shine or you will never last as a full time teacher here."

His words resonated to my core.

"I know, I'm sorry Sean."

"What Kurt Hummel apologizing? What's with the change of heart today kid?"

"Fuck off Sean...I'm just tired don't get used to it."

"There's the Hummel I know. We'll talk more on this on Monday Kurt. Talk to you soon."

"Bye Sean."

Little did he know that I had been a little shaken myself earlier when I encountered a curly haired man that I couldn't get out of my mind.

I had seen him watching my conversation with Ms. Logan but he seemed to only be half interested, but it was his presence that had me captivated.

He was shorter, with a thick but tamed mop of dark curls, and his frame was broad and muscular. The clothing was well tailored but not too expensive and it was his calming aura that had me approaching the man after my 'discussion' had ended with the woman storming off at my assessment of Damian Warrener.

I don't know where this new found courage came from but I soon found myself saying hello to the man but he didn't answer me right away. Only after I tapped him on the shoulder did he drop the sheet music he had been collecting and let out an audible gasp that had me freaking out.

I didn't mean to scare him, I was trying to approach noisily so he would have heard me but apparently I was maybe a little too stealthy.

I had muttered my apologies a little too fast and before I knew it I was crouching in my new suit, that shouldn't have been treated as such, as I helped gather his sheet music. I couldn't make eye contact with him, I felt too ashamed for no good reason, and this was not normal Kurt behaviour. I never had problems approaching guys before but something about him made me nervous.

I kept rambling on and on about being sorry for sneaking up on him, collecting the fall paper when the man grabbed both of my wrists and forced me to look at him.

His eyes were the most curious shades of copper and emerald that I had ever seen. There was kindness and something that resembled fear exuding from him as I looked at him and smiled sweetly. This wasn't a normal response for me...I was never truly lost for words but there was something hidden about this man that had me hooked and he hadn't even spoken yet.

I started rambling for no apparent reason, anything to not look this man in the eyes anymore, they were unravelling me with every glance.

"Sorry about the argument, I didn't want anyone to see that, but Ms. Logan was deft on defending her student. As you can tell I am here for Damian, well I was, and it was impressive but not really ya know?...Sorry I ramble and I didn't mean to scare you either. I mean, making you drop your lesson sheets, so you're a teacher?"

God why did I feel like I was a blushing teenager around this guy...I hadn't even introduced myself or learned his name, never mind finding out if he was gay or not...come on Hummel pull it together!

While waiting for the man to answer my question, I got more and more nervous that he didn't like me being in his personal space. He facial expression was mildly panicked and his eyes were focused on my mouth instead of my eyes which made me speak up again.

"What?" I furrowed my eyebrows and tried to figure out the meaning was behind his body language but it was confusing me, and before I knew it he stood up, gathering his sheets from me again and all but ran off towards the back hall through stage right.

Okay...that was odd.

I stood up a little confused at my own bashfulness and his odd responses to my queries. It was like he was interested in talking to me but it was also as if he wasn't there in the conversation. I wondered if it was something I said as I pulled on my coat and head fro the door, ringing Sean as soon as I got towards the main exit. Maybe I just looked like a blithering idiot and he wanted to get as far away as possible. Smooth Hummel...really smooth.

XXXX

I didn't want to go home...it was so lonely there and I didn't want to deal with the onslaught of messages on my answering machine from Rachel and Finn about coming home next weekend for Thanksgiving yet.

They lived 11 blocks from me and yet I sometimes still avoided the happy couple. Finn and I were, and had always been, close step brothers and Rachel and I were great friends. Unfortunately ever since she got the Broadway treatment that I longed for in my youth, sometimes being around the insufferable Rachel Berry made my skin crawl and turn green with envy

.

I loved my job...I loved opera, but deep down I knew that there was rooted jealousy for a future that I never got, and Ms. Berry...well Mrs Berry-Hudson now, was living it.

My dad was hosting dinner as per usual back in Lima and Finn and Rachel were undoubtedly coming, and I would have to deal with yet another family dinner with them and Carol fussing over why I didn't have a boyfriend to spend the holidays with. My dad, although conservative was very supportive and wanted me to find a partner that would make me happy, and settle down if I was ready.

But I was in no mood for that conversation yet...not at all. I contemplated calling my ex, Jackson, great in bed, but basically a moron when it came to matters of the heart. He was useful for one thing and one thing only, and it had been a while since I got laid, but I wasn't even in the mood for that right now.

Between the scolding I got for being hard on the student from Sean, the weirdo non conversation I had with that gorgeous stranger, and the thoughts of dealing with Finn and Rachel...I just wanted to crawl in a hole and get a drink.

The bar across the street seemed a homely enough looking hole, so I jay walked rather quickly against the blistering winds and relished in the warmth of the cozy English style pub once I got inside. I settled into a small booth off to the side and ordered a martini once I got settled.

My life was lonely, but it had it's moments. Kurt Hummel didn't need anyone, I had my music and my students and I didn't need anything else. That was until the outside door swung open again and my mystery man and that lady Ms. Logan walked in the door.

Shit.

OK guys and girls...I will leave it here because I am mean...lol no mostly because I am still writing the next chapter and it needed to stop here. Let me know what you thought guys...reviews are like air and fuel for my writings.

Love you all, and I'm so thankful for each comment or mention. Take care and happy belated New Year!