I do not own Naruto. I however, do own Josh and all his respective tecniques. Try to steal them, and i'll sue you into the ground.

Chapter XVII: A very old friend

"Josh… a… little… help… here?"

"Hmm? You don't need help. Kyuubi's got you covered."

"Not… today… for… some… reason…"

Josh sighed. "Fine. But you owe me a can of Biofoam."

"Got… it… just… close… the… wound…"

"One miracle, coming right up."

Faster then believable, the armored guardian whipped his helmet off, reached onto his belt, spun off a can of something, threw it into the air, and shot a single round. The can exploded, and the force pushed the regenerative foam into Naruto's wound, who sighed as the painkillers seeped into action as well.

"About time you fixed me up. Now, what took you so long?"

Josh cocked an eyebrow, sweeping a lock of hair away from his face. "Nature was calling at the same time as you. I don't know about you, but I didn't know who was calling me, and I sure as hell didn't know if there was another toilet nearby. Speaking of which, how do I know you're Naruto and not some imposter?"

Naruto didn't say a word. He didn't need to. The blond's hand whipped past his healing middle, got some blood, took off the red band, wiped some on the back, and stretched it out. He then passed the cloth to Josh, who unfurled it and took a whiff.

"Yep. It's definitely you, Naruto."

Gaara, who had just caught up with Naruto, along with the rest of the group, asked, "How can you tell?"

The brunette snorted and gestured to the cloth. "I don't know about you, but Naruto's the only person I know who carries around a bowl of Leather-Flavored Ramen in a storage seal on his upper arm."

Everyone just stared at him.

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"Alright, tell that to me again."

Josh grumbled as he passed another bandage over to Naruto. Apparently, the Biofoam wasn't holding up. Kisame's attack had been charged with demonic energy, severely slowing down the healing process.

"Well, hmm… where to start. Since you can't seem swallow the short version, guess I'll have to do it the old-fashioned way. Oh, you need another bandage?"

"Yeah… man, should have been more careful around Kisame. Forgot that I don't heal well against demonic attacks."

"How the hell can you forget? We spent almost a thousand years fighting these things! Even that should get through a skull as thick as yours!"

Naruto just stared at him.

"What? Quit looking at me like that. It's creepy."

"A thousand years, yes. However…"

"Oh… I get it. As part of the sentence, you had your…"

"Yes. They tried to erase my memory."

"But, and I'm not sure about this, since I was never given the details, that they ran into major trouble while trying to do so. Did they wind up-"

"Yep. Couldn't erase my memory, so they removed and broke it."

"Well, to have called me here means that you've restored at least part of it."

Naruto applied yet another bandage while medical ninja tried to speed up the process. "Oh, I've been getting flashbacks for years. That's how I taught Gaara here the basics of Protoguardian Arts."

Josh's mouth dropped. "But, this is an Unauthorized Dimension! You're unusual enough in the fact that you managed to achieve where you were, but to have yet another guardian-"

"Is not unheard of. Remember, the Original Guardian was technically from an Unauthorized Dimension."

"But you're not the Original Guardian! Besides, he was far more powerful then you ever were. Glad to see that Ki is in, by the way. Haven't talked to you in a while. How's it inside Naruto's head?"

"Not that bad. Kinda stuffy, and Kyuubi gets on everyone's nerves with his shitty jokes, but all considering, I'd say we're better off then those four."

At this point, Hinata couldn't hold back any longer. "Excuse me, Josh-san."

"Just Josh is fine. I hate honorifics."

"Well, Josh. What are you talking about? Naruto-kun was only gone for seven years, not a thousand."

The brunette turned to look disbelievingly at the blond. "You mean to tell me that you haven't told them yet?"

"No. I don't see a reason to burden them with it."

"Is that a decision made by you, or did…"

"We all made it together. Well, with the exception of him, of course."

"I should hope so. Yeah, so, little girl, it seems that I'm not at liberty to tell you the full story. Though… should I show them the memories?"

"… I can't see the harm in that. Maybe this will show Lee that I'm not as tough as I seem right now."

"Very well. Now, I'll need everyone's hands, palm up."

"Remember to censor it."

"Alright. Hey, do you need another bandage? Looks like this one's bleeding through again."

"Nah. Kyuubi should have it done by time we get back."

"Alright then. Everyone just relax. This can be a tad disconcerting the first time. Now, stack hand on top of one another. No, not like that, palms down, stack them. There. Now, just relax. Sacred Guardian Art: Living Memory!"

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The memory was in a wide hallway with a jumpsuit clad Naruto at one end of a circle, Josh slowly circling at the other end. The blond looked as he did the day he left Konoha, but Josh was wearing street clothes, not yet armored.

"Who the hell are you?"

"The name's Naruto Uzumaki."

"Hmm… not impressed. Stay out of my way."

"What did I do to you?"

"You're wearing an orange jumpsuit. Need I say more?"

"Why you little… I'll have you know that Orange is the color of the gods."

"Hmm… really sad gods, I guess."

"That's it. Rasengan!"

"Initial Guardian Art: Blazing Ice Blade!

The two techniques clashed for the briefest second before the first technique was completely wiped out. Naruto was blown into the sky, covered in flaming ice.

"Come back when you get stronger."

Everything turned black for a few seconds before becoming clear again. Naruto was still wearing the orange jumpsuit, but Josh had already donned the armor, albeit without the helmet. He had also acquired his rifle.

"Damn it, Naruto! Get that one. No, the one with the limp!"

"I got it! Sacred Guardian Art: Raiton, Raikiri! Sacred Guardian Art: Rasengan! Sacred Guardian Art: Partial Fusion!" The blond slowly twisted the two techniques, space seeming to melt where they connected. "Sacred Guardian Art: Orange Lightning!"

At this point, Lee had to interrupt. Everyone was floating above the battlefield, looking down. "Josh-san-"

"Didn't I just say to drop the honorifics?"

"Very well, Josh. What is that attack? I know this is just a memory, but the energy coming off of it is beyond anything I've ever felt."

"Naruto, or rather, should I say, Ki, would you like to take this one?"

The blond in question nodded. "Yes. Well, that attack is called Orange Lightning, probably my most famous technique. Naruto creates it by fusing Raikiri with the Rasengan, both in Sacred Guardian form. The resulting technique is so dense that I can't move with it."

"Then how do you-"

"Just watch and find out. I figured out a way around it."

Josh threw a kunai, aiming directly for the largest one. "Now, Naruto!"

"Right." Everyone could see just how much stress the blond was under. Even from this height, they could hear his knees and ankles popping from the strain. "Hiraishin!"

And miraculously, as if by magic, Naruto with the ball of twisting and spitting orange energy, moved off toward the kunai, tearing through enemies as he went, all while gaining momentum. "Take this! Orange Lightning!"

The crackling of energy cut through the air as the technique struck home. The beast screamed in pain as layer after layer of its armor was shredded. "Josh! NOW!"

"Don't have to tell me, genius. Dark Guardian Art: Bijuu Seal!"

The bijuu roared as it shrank into a seal the size of a postage stamp. "Well, that's that. Let's get back to-"

"Josh! Behind you!"

"What?"

"Little boy. Learn to pay attention."

"I don't think so! Josh! Duck! Orange Lightning!"

This Josh just managed to get down in time as Naruto soared by, ball of crackling lightning held in hand. "Nobody touches my friend!"

"Bijuu Seal!"

The entire thing went black for a few more seconds before shifting slowly back into clarity.

"Alright, Naruto. We're hooking up the suppressant now. Feel free to begin the test."

"Remember, invoke your deepest emotions and feelings and then try to focus and supress it. If you can do that, then you can control it."

"Right." Naruto crossed his arms and focused."

"Heh. This test is what caused all the trouble."

"I don't exactly remember… what happened?"

"You honestly don't remember? This was a test to invoke and control it."

Hinata managed to get a word in. "Are you t-talking about K-Kyuubi?"

Josh snorted and froze the memory. "Kyuubi? That furball? He's harmless. Great with children, for a bijuu, at any rate. He's probably the most docile bijuu I've ever met, and trust me; I've seen and sealed quite a few bijuu."

"Hey! I have a reputation to keep around here!"

"Well, maybe if you weren't such a softie…"

"I-Is that Kyuubi?"

"No, its Santa Fox come to town, five months too early. Of course it's Kyuubi, you simple human."

"Kyuubi. Keep it down. We're trying to see view a memory here."

Everyone heard the fox snort. "Yeah, whatever. I still can't believe that you broke the seal. That's what kept me trapped in here."

"You mean…"

"The day you undid that seal, the power from that memory sealed me in here. So, until you find a workaround, I'm out for battles. That is, unless you decide to summon me. And with that other seal, you'll lose the ability to summon me in a few weeks."

"Wait. What other seal?"

"You mean you don't know? I thought you were given a full list."

"I wasn't given canned shit. Do you have a list?"

"I'll have Uzu give it to you later. I'm off to take a nap."

"Do you have it now?"

"… I might…"

"Could I see it?"

"I'm sleeping now. I can't hear you."

"Stupid Furball… Naruto, why do you keep him around?"

"Don't ask me. My dad forced him on me."

"Hmm… do you know…?"

"Of course I know, you idiot. This is my body, after all."

"Why don't we finish the memory, then we'll discuss this. Your friends and comrades seem to be running out of air."

"Snore! Z. Z. Z."

"SHUT UP!"

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"He's losing control! Energy levels are spiking off the charts!"

A video screen in front of Josh blazed to life, and a man who looked remotely like him spoke in a gruff voice.

"Josh, get your ass back here and get your sword. We're in for one helluva fight."

"Are you serious? My sword!? That means…"

"That's right. We're going to damage control."

"And you need me with a sword? Just how much damage do you expect?"

"Enough. Suffice to say that I have summoned The Ten. Director Out."

"Idiot. He knows he can't control The Ten. That's why he scattered them in the first place."

"Sir, we should get out of here. The building's losing its structural integrity."

"How long."

"Sir?"

"How long until he completely loses control?"

"With the rate the suppressant agent is metabolizing, we have about half an hour at most, if the field remains uncompromised."

"Plenty of time for me to stop this."

"With all due respect, sir, we've been ordered to fall back to GHQ. You're a member of The Ten that he summoned. We-"

"I am countermanding those commands. Give me Root Access to the suppressant sphere."

"But-"

"That's a direct order, Captain. Don't you dare ignore it."

"Yes, sir. Accessing Root Directory. You have control, sir."

"The rest of you get out of here. I'll handle this."

"Are you sure about this?"

"Once again, Captain, That's an order."

"Right. Everyone, let's get out!"

"Psh. Superid?" he whipped out a combat knife. This one was different then the one he currently carried. This one didn't have a serrated edge or black blade. "Let's see just how strong you really are."

"RAWR!"

"The hell is that?"

"Why, hello, Josh. How nice to see YOU!"

"Son of a-!"

The memory faded, and instead of one smooth memory, conjoined by flashes of blinding light.

"So… it's been a while, hasn't it, One?"

A man with silver hair raised a huge blade, pointing it at Naruto. "You abomination. My predecessor helped seal you away. How did you return…"

"That's for me to know and you to find out. Shadow Guardian Art: Raiton: Raikiri!"

"That's enough. One through Five, attack his right arm. Six through Ten, go after his left arm. GO!"

"Foolish Guardians. Do you really think I can be suppressed that easily? You underestimate me. Shadow Guardian Art: Silver Light-"

"Scatter! Delta Attack Formation!"

Everyone saw the ten swordsmen scatter, blades trailing behind them as they attempted to circle Naruto and his extremely dangerous energy attack. Even in the memory, everyone except Kyuubi, Josh, and Naruto flinched at the sheer amount of ambient energy in the air.

"W-What i-is t-t-t-this?"

"That… is Naruto… at Seventy-Five Percent Potential."

"S-Seventy Five?" This was not Hinata stuttering. This was Gaara, sand gourd falling off and landing on an invisible barrier.

"Yes, Sandman. Seventy-Five Percent. There's never been a recorded instance of this idiot reaching his full potential. I don't think we want him to either. As you power up or down, the rate of growth and decay moves exponentially as well. The same goes for any of us. Ah… there I am. Man, I thought I was a goner. Talked big for several hundred years, but even with the ten of us fighting together, we barely managed to scratch him. In return, we lost three and forced another into early retirement."

"Really? You lost three? Which ones?"

"Four, Five, and Nine were all destroyed. We never found anything besides their swords. Three decided to take an early retirement since we couldn't figure out how to regrow his leg."

"Regrow. His. Leg?"

"Yes, Catman. Regrow limbs. Naruto, would you care to explain?"

"You do it. I can't seem to remember how to."

"Stupid Uzu… anyway, when we become what we are, our genetic and physical structures change somewhat. With a large enough input of energy, you can stimulate enough growth to completely replace a lost limb. And trust me, we need it. What with the amount of failed techniques ripping off arms and legs, we would be little more then stumps if we didn't have this ability."

"Sacred Guardian Art: Million Moonbeam Seal!"

Even as they watched from above, The Ten managed to surround a Naruto who was still lashing out every chance he got. All ten of the swordsmen raised their blades and were chanting while making sure they weren't in direct range of the blond. At an unknown signal, all ten swordsmen stopped, pointed their swords at the blond, and began to chant even faster. Even from this altitude, Josh's brown head was easily spotted among all the grey and silver.

By some unheard signal, thousands upon thousands of thin and pale silvery strands flowed from the tips and bound the blond from head to foot rather like a cocoon. "There. It is done. Not even Nigh-"

Boom.

"You were saying, One? Not even The Ten can stop me."

"Spoke too soon."

"The hell you did. Sacred Guardian Art: Bunker Buster!"

"Too slow, Josh. Come back again when you get stronger. Shadow Guardian Art: Silver Lightning."

The high-speed antimatter warhead met the blade of crackling lighting bolt and detonated, spewing smoke and debris everywhere. There was no way-

"That's the famed Bunker Buster? How disappointing. I didn't even feel it."

"Im-Impossible! Twenty Gigatons of focused explosive power, not to mention a Supercharged Guardian Core. Even after all that, not even a scratch…"

"Quite right. However, that warhead wasn't designed for destroying a person, your aim was off, and you didn't fully charge that warhead."

"How can you tell-"

"I've seen the attack before. I know how much damage it can really do if you really try. Remember, I have my host's memory. Access to all his techniques and abilities. I'm unstoppable."

"Not quite, my disciple."

"I know that voice… Old man, what do you want?"

"Naruto. This isn't you. Feel back to your human side. Feel back to what you were before."

"He's gone. All that's left is me and this power."

"I know that's not true. The Naruto that I knew would never let something like you take over."

"Well, he did. Any last words?"

"Yes. I'm coming out of retirement. For a few minutes, at any rate."

"Shi-"

"I helped to seal you away. I know all your weaknesses. After all, I'm the only remaining member of the original sealing team left."

"You… You were the One?"

"That is correct. The third layer is mine."

"Foolish Old Man. You're out of your prime. Even back then, before the Primordial Seal, it took seven of you."

"Perhaps. But since you're occupying my student's body and claims that he has no control, I won't hold back. Besides, your power is limited by that body. A body to which I alone know the full potential."

"Bring it o-"

"Shadow Guardian Art: Phoenix Blade."

With blinding speed, the frail-looking old man spun his blade out of its sheath and attacked Naruto, who parried with a sword of his own. The only difference between the two was that the elder of the two had a blade of blazing flame, not metal.

"Not bad. I see your skills have not waned over time. However, I have full access to my host's incomplete techniques. Cosmic Guardian Art: Kri-"

"Shadow Guardian Art: Infinite Darkness."

At this point, Josh paused the memory and tapped the layer separating them from the action. "I was really quite lucky to get this memory. Caught him on a good day and managed to weasel this little bit out of him. However, I can say, since I was there, this battle lasted two days. You get to see the first ninety seconds."

"What, just Ninety Seconds?"

"Since when have you been able to get more out of him? We're no match for him, no matter how much he may train us."

"Speak for yourself. I held my own."

"That's not you, dumbass." Josh sighed. "Whatever, let's just finish this." He waved his hand, and the memory started again.

"This is…"

"Yes. This is the apex of Shadow Guardian. An enclosed time-space sphere where the normal laws of nature and power no longer apply. Of course, this also means that…"

"The Primordial Seal is no longer in effect."

"That is correct. Now, I'll give you one last chance to surrender and return Naruto to himself."

"I keep on telling you, he's no longer here to return."

"Very well, if that's what you insist. Ani-"

"And that's a wrap."

"That's it? Man, you cut it off."

"Josh, is that you?"

Everyone reached for their weapons, but relaxed as a blurred Naruto stepped toward them.

"Ah, Ru. It's been a while."

"I could say the same for you."

"Keeping the peace in here?"

The blond looked around. "Sure. Whatever peace there is around this madhouse."

"HEY!"

"Well, we're off. See you around."

"Good luck with it."

"Don't have to tell me."

"W-Why did t-the m-memory end?"

"Blame it on security protocol. Besides, gramps wouldn't give me anymore."

"Well, let's get back. Josh?"

"On it."

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"Alright, what was that? It stirred up more questions than it solved. Just what the hell was the point of showing us that memory?"

"Well, Catman, if you give me a chance to explain, maybe you'll have less questions."

"Uhh, Josh. Do you have any more… bandages?"

The brunette in question cocked his head and threw another handful of bandages. "If anyone here can heal, I would say that he's ready for conventional treatment."

"… I'll send for a medic."

"A very good idea. Thanks, Gaara."

"Anyway, we're off."

"Wait, I thought you were going to answer our questions."

Josh snorted, pulled out his combat knife, and started to twirl it. "You didn't give me a chance. As soon as Naruto's stable, we're pulling out. One of the two is still in the area."

"… You didn't get the Uchiha?"

"An Uchiha? The famed Sharingan?"

"… Correct…"

"Bit more problematic then I once thought. We're going by air."

"Ai- You can fly!?"

The brunette snorted, slotted the knife away and pulled out a pistol, twirling it continuously. "Psh. Of course. I'm our team's Tech Specialist. Anything you from an Obibital Bombardment to Sniper Shots come through me. Can't heal worth shit though. Usually don't need to. I don't get hurt that often, and Naruto doesn't usually need it. Our third team member used to with long-range energy attacks along with healing, but she's no longer with us…"

"…I'm sorry."

"Don't be. No matter how hard you try, death eventually comes. Even to people like Naruto. But he's learned to bitchslap it."

"WHAT?"

"Yep. Caught him drinking with the physical embodiment of Karma, sparred with Death, and bitchslapped Kami once. Man, what a mess that was."

"H-He what?"

"Kami plays dirty with cards. Naruto caught her cheating, she whacked him on the head, and he bitchslapped her. The fight following was quite interesting, I have to admit. Naruto's one of the few of us who can stand up to a god and limp away."

"Did he win?"

Josh snorted again, shooting Kankuro an incredulous look. "Are you kidding me? We're powerful and Naruto especially so, but even he can't stand up to a god like Kami and come out on the winning side. He did manage, however, to pull her dress down and created several moons in the process."

"W-What?"

"Yep. Then she shredded his arms and legs and threw him over the edge. Quite impressive. We're all surprised that he could move fast enough to slap her, not to mention get past the extensive wards that protect all gods, no matter how high or low, is beyond impressive."

"Just how impressive is it?"

"Blondie, if you knew how hard it is to hit a god, you wouldn't be so skeptical. I've studied the barrier. The damn things repel Gravity, Magic, Physical Matter, Elemental Attacks, and Energy Attacks. The only thing it doesn't fully repel is seals, and that's so that they can change their shape at will. In other words, nobody knows how he got through."

"Well, I'm ready to go. Josh, get the jet."

"Looks like times up. He's in charge here. I'm out."

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"The hell, Naruto! Why didn't you tell me that the atmosphere has a low oxygen content? I am not burning my hydrogen in a place like this!"

"Oh, come on. It's just some hydrogen…"

"I would have to use slush hydrogen, which is ridiculously expensive right now!"

"What do you normally use?"

"Metallic Hydrogen. Much cheaper to harvest and store. No need for pesky temperature controls. However, you neglected to ever mention that you don't have enough oxygen in your world to burn. Looks like we're going by land, then."

"We're gonna walk?"

"That's right, blondie. That is, unless you wanna pay my gas bill?"

Naruto vehemently shook his head. "No thanks. You can keep that to yourself. I've seen the numbers. Your energy bill his higher then my ramen bill…"

"… To be frank, I find that impossible."

"I have to agree with the human raccoon for once. Well, no point standing around and bickering all day in the heat. Let's get going. Now, which way is home?"

"And you were gonna fly?"

"Fuck you."

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"Of all the godforsaken places you could have plopped me down in, you just had to pick the middle of a fucking desert, didn't you?"

"Oh, shut up. I didn't want to call on you till a lot later. But what with that seal…"

"Which you have yet to tell me what it is. Just how bad is it?"

"Why don't you look and see? The Bushy Brows are racing back to Konoha. Knowing them and their gates, they'll probably be at the edge of the desert right now. We've got plenty of time."

"Sure. Seal?"

Naruto held out both his hands while Josh swapped out something in his helmet, before blowing some sand out and slotting it on. "Now… what do we have here…? Dual-layer… inverted… the hell is this Naruto? It's not even a seal!"

"Oh? Well, how about now?" the blond raised his hands until his thumbs were touching his canines, both palms still flat.

Josh leaned in closer, muttering under his breath, until. "Those sons of bitches. I never knew about this…"

"Nobody did. And nobody does. Well, you do now, of course, and Hinata over there once you explain things to her."

"Umm… W-What seal?"

The brunette slotted off his helmet and tucked it under his arm. "The seal in question is a forbidden one, even to us. There are only a handful of people skilled enough to use the damn thing, and it's definitely not anyone we see regularly."

"You're ranting again. Get to the point sometime before we sink into the sand."

"Alright, alright. I'm getting there. You may not be able to see it, but there are two semicircles with embedded triangles on his palms along with one on his forehead. Without an energy filter, you won't be able to see them."

"-Which won't be a problem, will it, Hinata?"

She nodded, forming a seal. "Byakugan!"

"Hmm? Byakugan? Then this is-"

"The prized bloodline limit. Allows the wielder to see any energy with a constant three hundred and fifty nine degree panoramic view, with a small blind spot at the base of the neck. Quite useful, but I haven't got a need for it."

"And why the fuck not? It would give you one helluva advantage in battle."

Naruto snorted. "Who needs a Byakugan when you can form several thousand clones that look in every which direction anyway? Besides, I like my eyes and I don't want a transplant, no offense, Hinata."

"O-Of course n-not. But w-what am I l-looking for?"

The blond raised his hand and pointed to his life line. "Six Millimeters down. There's one part of the seal. The other two are identical, just rotated."

"A-And what is i-it?"

Josh folded his arms and started walking again. "It's known as the Time Constrictor Seal, or as I call it, the Seal of Unholy Draining. The mechanics of the seal are simple enough. The corners of the triangle are the remains of a blood seal that stop the flow of power though time. Normally, that seal is easily removed. However, the circle on the outside is known as the Great Barrier Seal. It's one of the most powerful seal protectors ever developed. After cross-referencing-"

"Stop. You're ranting again. Speak Japanese. That way, we can all understand you. That translator's still in effect, right?"

"Not my fault you're an idiot and can't understand English."

Naruto jerked a thumb at Hinata. "It's not for my sake."

"Oh, right. Sorry about that… Anyway, there are only a few people that can do either. To do them both at the same time is simply unheard of."

"That's right."

"W-What do y-you mean?"

Josh pulled out his rifle and removed the clip, checking the inside for damage. "What I'm saying is that even Naruto at his peak wouldn't have been able to provide enough energy to generate that seal formation."

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"Brat. Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you."

"You would never catch me?"

Tsunade didn't bother responding in words, instead, she threw a chakra-enhanced punch at Naruto, who caught it in one hand. "Too slow, baa-chan."

"My Jonin are still scraping paint off their boots. Why did you see fit to barricade yourself inside your house?"

"Simple. I was-"

"UZUMAKI!"

Naruto sighed. "What now?"

"WHERE WHAT YOU DOING WITH MY DAUGHTER?"

"Keeping her away from the fangirls. Somehow, she can breach my front gates."

"ENOUGH LIES! YOU WILL DIE FOR DEFILING MY DAUGHTER! JUKEN!"

The blond sighed, leaned right, and caught Hiashi's wrist in one hand. "Seriously. If you're gonna attack me, at least put a real reason behind it. baa-chan, I'm heading home. Send a messenger if you need anything. Come on, Josh. Quit staring."

After the footsteps had faded from earshot, Tsuande snapped off rapid orders. "Shizune. Get the ANBU on a constant border patrol. Itachi is still out there somewhere. Hinata, go to the hospital and get checked out. Gai, Lee, that goes for you too. Hiashi-"

The Hyuga Clan Leader perked up. "Don't attack Naruto again. You'll get destroyed. Now. EVERYONE, GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!"

The Hiraishin wouldn't have been fast enough for anyone present. Before she could even blink, everyone was gone and she was alone again. "Damned brat." Tsunade muttered before pulling out a bottle of sake.

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Josh and Naruto had finally arrived at the gates of Naruto's home. The armored guardian whistled.

"I see you're doing well. Spend much on this?"

"Nope. Got it from my dad. Has sensei changed his form yet?"

Josh shook his head before pushing on the gates. "Nah. He's technically in retirement. You know how old he is."

Naruto pushed his armored partner aside and wiped some dried blood on the gates. "Blood seal. I'll give you a sample later so that you can get in or out. Let's get you settled in before going for some lunch. My treat."

"Please don't tell me it's gonna be ramen."

"Yep. You know me all too well."

"I am not going to eat that shit."

Naruto jumped back as if stung. "How dare you… Ramen is the food of the gods! You will be struck down for your impudence!"

Nothing happened. A few birds few by in the background, and some leaves rustled, but nothing happened. "I said, you will be struck down for your impudence!"

"… I am so not going to do that, boss."

"Uzu, get your ass over here and tackle josh, goddamnit!"

"You owe me. I'm not going to do that."

Naruto Sweatdropped. "Screw this. Let's drop your stuff off and get something to eat."

"You can count me out if you're eating ramen. How about a sparring session?"

Naruto made a shadow clone, who took some of his stuff inside. "You're on. Light contact?"

Josh grinned and unsheathed his combat knife. "Nah. Where's the fun in that? You know I prefer… Full Contact."

"Bring it on, you tin can!"

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Author's Note.

AND! CUT!

That's a wrap for Chapter XVII, people. Great work.

Anyway, if you're reading this author's note, then thank you! I put these in for a reason. It gives you up-to-date information about my writings.

So. next chapter is out. Now that i've got two pieces, i'll be spiltting my time between them. if you have not checked out my other piece, Orange Lightning, then i highly advise you do so, especially if you enjoy banter between Josh and Naruto, or if you just want to see what naruto was like back in the day.

But now, i've got a new dilema. I recently started reading Full Metal Alchemist, and now i'm considering another prequel for Timeless. I already have the name. However, one poll at a time. i just took the old one down and put a new one up, this time not story related. I hope i get better feedback then the last one. it was up for nearly seven months and i had just around 30 votes, including my own. But if you know how, you can go see the results of that poll.

Anyway, to the announcer part!

Who is this Josh? How can he defeat Kisame so quickly? HOW COULD HE HATE THE GOD THAT IS RAMEN!? Will Naruto emerge intact from their sparring session? Find out next time, on Timless, a Naruto Fanon.

And that's a wrap.

Nothing more to spheal about. The current poll will stay up until the next chapter of Timeless, which should be between 1 and 3 weeks.

Later

Xingster