do you do when one BFF is mad at you and the other is in some serious trouble. What do you do when your 2 brothers are being used as weapons? What to do if you agreed to take a piece of a little pest off of a certain blonde? And what if all this is happening cause you got sucked into the Naru-verse? Now what if you and your friends loved to write Lemons?
My friends were wishing me luck with my training.
"When I shall come back, I will know a kick ass jitsu!" I promise.
"Yeah right, un." Deidara comments.
"You can't even jump," Itachi adds.
"Shut up!" I huff. "Lets make it a bet! Losers have to do a dare of the winners choice!"
"Deal!" Deidara spits on his hand and holds it out to me.
Itachi copies that action.
I spit on both my hands and shake hands with the two.
"Lets do this!" I run out the room.
The training grounds had a small little lake, and a bunch of trees.
There were a bunch of broken weapons on the ground.
"Tooobiiii," I call out bored. "...Madaraaaaaa..."
"What?" Tobi jumps out the tree.
"Teach me a kick ass jitsu!" I command.
"You can't even jump, how can I teach you a jitsu?" Tobi comments.
I glare, "Stop. Mentioning. It."
Tobi chuckles at my reaction, "You first must learn chakra control,"
~~~~~
So we did the whole training thing, I learned all the handsigns, I learned how to SORT OF control my chakra, and now Tobi's saying trainings over.
"But you didn't teach me my jitsu!" I huff. "I don't wanna lose my bet!"
"You still can't jump," He adds.
"SHUT UP!" I snap.
I think for a minute.
Handsigns.
Nothing.
Super pose.
Handsigns.
Still nothing.
I yell in frustration, Tobi watching from a safe distance.
"What did Naruto do?" I talk to myself. "Didn't he like, bite his thumb?"
I try that, getting no blood AND jumping around like a little kid cursing like Hidan.
"Gotta be strong... Gotta win this bet.." I mumble.
I try again, drawing blood, then quickly do the handsigns(getting blood all over my hands in the process).
Nothing.
"FUCK YOU FUCKING JITSU! HOW DARE YOU NOT FUCKING WORK! I SWEAR TO JASHIN IF YOU DON'T WORK I WILL FUCKING BITCH SLAP YOU INTO NEXT WEEK!" I snap.
I bite my thumb a bit to hard, and make a finger-gun.
With a poof, I end up with a gun and knife strapped to my left thigh.
On my right thigh is a spot for my gun to go.
"Fuck yeah!" I cheer.
"What is that?" Tobi questions.
"Its a gun," I explain. "A weapon from my world."
"So you can summon a weapon from another world... But you can't jump?"
"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" I whip around and shoot at the Uchiha.
He falls backwards out the tree, yelling out in surprise.
I raise my eyebrow, "What was that? Can't you, like, dodge it?"
Tobi glares at me.
"Oh and, sorry for shooting you," I mumble.
I then notice my thumb still bleeding.
"Tobi!" I whine. "My thumb won't stop bleeding!"
~~~~
I walk into the living room with my ultra smug face on.
"What's with the look?" Sasori glances at me.
"I AM ULTRA BEAST!" I yell. "ITACHI! DEIDARA!"
"What?" Itachi sits up and stretches. "Come to lose your bet?"
"Actually, i DID learn a kick ass jitsu!" I mock.
"Sure you did, un," Deidara rolls his eyes.
"Ok Tobi, what's Kitsune's great jitsu?" Pein rolls his eyes.
I stand in front of everyone, bite my other thumb, and make my finger gun.
"Take that, bitches!" I tease.
"What is it?" Pein questions.
"A gun, weapon from my world," I explain. "Very hard to dodge, very deadly."
"Test it on Hidan,"
I aim at the albino and pull the trigger.
And ear ringing bang goes off, a hole in the albino's chest.
"It works!" I cheer. "Time to pay up!"
Itachi and Deidara get a gloomy aura.
"Hmm... what should this dare be..." I mutter to myself.
"I've got one!" Momo bounces in.
"Hm?"
"Ok, Deidara and Itachi.."
"Yeeahh?"
"Must go on a date with us."
"Hold on a sec," I sip a mouthful of water and spit it out. "Are you kidding me!"
"Nope."
"B-But... fine... I have no other ideas..."
The two guys sigh and roll there eyes,
"Where to, hm?"
"Uh..." I pause to think.
"We're going to Waterfall Village! I love it there!" Momo announces.
"O...k..?"
"Go get ready," Itachi instructs.
"Yeah yeah yeah," I pull Momo upstairs to Konan's room.
"Hey guys," Konan waves.
"Hey Konan-chan! Can we borrow some dresses?" Momo pleads. "For our date?"
"With who?" Konan raises her eyebrows surprised.
"Deidara and Itachi."
"Um... ok.?
Konan looks us over, then disapears into her closet.
"Hey, Konan-chan!" I chime. "What're your thoughts on yaoi?"
"Never seen it."
"WHAT!"
"Why're you screaming?" Konan comes out with a dress in each hand.
"Sit!" I force her to sit on the bed, crawl under her bed, and pull out my favorite yaoi.
"WHy is ther... yaoi under my bed?" Konan questions.
"Just watch this while we get dressed!" I pop the DVD on and press play.
"Watcha doin?" Flavia peeks in.
Konan was all about leaning up against the screen, watching the clip.
I giggle at her expression as it ends.
"That was so..." Konan turns to us. "HOT!"
"Ohhh?" I tease. "Has Konan been hooked onto yaoi?"
"Sh-Shut up!" Konan blushes.
"Just admit it! Your becoming one of us!" Momo teases.
"I-I am not! I'm much to mature... To be... Hooked onto your... Childish... hobbies?" Konan looks unsteady.
The 3 of us stare intesnly at her.
"Oh what the hell, fine! I'll become one of you!" Konan smiles.
"Woohoo! Welcome Konan-chan!" Flavia cheers.
"Now for initiation!" I announce.
"Initiation?" Konan cocks her head.
"Mmhmm..." Momo taps her chin. "You need a kick ass skill, a super awesome talent, a cool everyday skill, a catch phrase, and pass a secret test we will deciede on..."
Konan sips her drink, "I guess my kick ass skill is being a paper ninja,"
"Of course," Momo smirks.
"My super awesome talent is singing,"
"Haha, unexpected," Flavia giggles.
"A cool everyday skill is cooking..."
"Konan's cooking is the bomb!" I cheer. "Catch phrase?"
I massage my thumb.
"Your an idiot." Konan rolls her eyes.
"Evil!" I pout. "But a good catch phrase,"
"So what"s the secret test?" Konan questions.
"Hmmm... We should have her kiss Pein!" Momo offers.
Konan does a spit take at this idea.
"Nah... That's to simple," Flavia waves her hand.
"Hmm, fake her death?" Momo again.
"No way, Pein'd kill us," I smack her head.
"Oh yeah..."
"Strip dance?" (Flavia)
"Teasing Pein?" (Me)
"Cross dressing?" (Momo)
"Slave?" (Flavia)
"Playing Mistress?" (Momo)
"Oooh! I know!" I announce. "Go get us Pein's porn stash! Only get the guy on guy ones!"
Konan chokes on an ice cube, "Pein has a *koff koff* porn stash?"
"Yep," I nod. "That's where I got the first one, but I couldn't carry more than one,"
"Oh, and get Kisame's too!" Flavia adds. "But you absolutely CAN NOT get caught!"
Konan nods, "Is it really worth it..? ...Yeah. You guys are entertaining,"
"Woohoo!" I cheer.
Don't judge, yaoi and gay porn is the same.
"OMG! Our dates!" Momo suddenly remembers.
"Oh yeahh..." I mutter.
I had on a red, sparkly dress that stopped a little below the waist, black leggings under it. Red heels, I could barely walk in.
I take off the heels and replace them with red ninja shoes.
Konan just rolls her eyes and walks out the room.
Momo had on a dark green dress, also sparkly, that went down to her knees. No leggings and green heels.
"Finally, someone with a good sense of style," Momo comments.
Me and Momo rush downstairs to find our "dates" watching TV.
"Let's go!"
"What happened, hm?" Deidara asks.
I pull my hair into a ponytail, ignoring the question.
"Let's go!" Momo leads the way,
We sat in a restraunt that sold sushi.
I could just imagine what was going on in Momo's mind...
I bet it was: Hottie... omg... so hot... yummy... hotty...
I sigh and stare down at the table.
"How may I help you?" This waitress with a huge bust comes over.
I catch her eying MY Deidara.
I-I mean...
I glare, "Mhm, can I get a Titanic roll?"
"Uh... huh..." She scribbles it down, not taking her eyes off Deidara.
"Take a picture, it'll last longer!" I growl.
The waitress finally takes her eyes off the blonde to glare back at me, "Excuse me?"
"You heard me."
"Ahh, Kitsune, un?" Deidara gives me a funny look.
I shoot to my feet, only a few inches shorter than the waitress.
"I don't think I like your additude," The waitress growls.
"I KNOW I don't like you." I shoot back. "Back up off of MY BLONDIE."
"Your blondie?"
"Your?" Momo mutters.
"Yeah, my blondie." I ignore Momo's comment.
"Ha! You wish!" The waitress laughs.
I turn red and grab hold of her hair, "My blondie you son of a dick sucker!"
She turns twice as red, grabs my hair, and screams back, "Burn in hell!"
"Get a life you good for nothing, dick sucking, donkey raping, horse ass bitch!"
She freezes as tears come to her eyes, "H-Heartless much?"
"Mmmm, just get your eyes of my man," I scoff.
She takes our orders and trudges off.
I take my seat and avoid ANY eye contact.
"Your blondie, un?" Deidara teases.
"Shut up!"
"Aww, you know you love me, un."
"Shut up! I was in the moment!"
"Suuure."
The food is set down by a different waiter.
"FOooooood." I moan.
Deidara suddenly pulls my food away.
"Hey!"
"ADmit it, hm."
"Admit what?"
He reaches out for my food.
"Don't touch it!"
"I'm gonna touch it, un!"
"Don't!"
"I will,"
"Nooooooo!"
Momo's P.O.V
It's fun watching Deidara mess with Kitsune.
Itachi motions to me with his head.
I stare as he motions for me to follow him.
I nod and quietly get up, following him.
Once we're outside he says, "Let's leave those two idiots to themselves."
"Blonde idiots," I correct..
"What's the difference?"
"Blonde's are dumber than most idiots."
[A/N: No offense to any blonde's]
We walk through town, ending up at the lake.
"It's so prettiful..." I coo.
Itachi chuckles and wraps his arm around my shoulder.
"I guess this wasn't so bad..." Itachi mutters.
"For us. Not to sure about the blonde's."
"Must you always try to be right? Emphasis on try."
Kitsune's P.O.V
"Noo! Deidara!" I whine. "You already touched it! Don't eat it!"
"I'm gonna eat it, un!"
"Nooooooooooo!"
He laughs and puts it up to his mouth.
"Deidara!" I reach out and grab his arm, keeping him from eating it.
He pops it into his mouth.
"Deidara!"
"Yeah?"
"My food..."
"Don't worry, I'll get you some more food..." He chuckles.