Sorry it's been a few days, but here's the next chapter. Let me know what you think, I love reading your reviews! As always, feel free to leave recommendations and advice.
The next morning I woke up when Peeta began to stir.
"Sorry," he began as he stretched and his prosthetic leg hit my shin.
It didn't really hurt so I just shook my head, indicating that it really wasn't a big deal. We sat in bed for a few moments and I couldn't help but smile to myself when I remembered that it was Saturday and Peeta promised we would be heading to the woods.
"Are you hungry? Do you want something for breakfast?" He began as he stood up next to the bed.
"Yes, but can we take something to the woods? I want to get out sooner rather than later." I said. Then I remembered my goal to be less selfish, "If that's okay with you."
Peeta smiled and ruffled his hair a little to help him wake up and said, "yeah, of course. Let me get started."
With that he headed downstairs and I finally stood up. I made my way to the bathroom and got ready for the day. I made sure to change inside the bathroom before heading out and upon opening the door, Peeta opened the bedroom door.
"I'm baking some muffins. If you want you can get the rest of our meal ready while I shower," he suggested.
I nodded and headed downstairs to finish packing. My ankle was sore, but not impossible, to walk on so I gripped onto the stair railing for dear life. As I made my way around the kitchen preparing our lunch, I began thinking about what Peeta had said the night before and tried to resolve it with how I felt. According to him I wasn't selfish, just messed up. Either option didn't make me feel great, but I guess one was better than the other? No, regardless of what he said, I was selfish. How often had I actually told him thanks for what he did every day? What did I even try to do on a regular basis to help him? I began to sink down into a feeling of depression and confusion when I felt his hand on my shoulder.
"Sorry I took so long," he began as he kissed the top of my head. "Do you need me to grab anything else?"
I turned to face him and answered, "If you want to, get my bag and put a blanket in it. I had the food ready to go. I don't know if you want to bring anything else," I shrugged.
He looked at me with a tilt of his head and a faint, "you okay?"
I smiled and nodded. He returned my smile and left to grab the rest of the things we would need. He returned a few moments later with the items I suggested as well as his art supplies. We packed the food in my bag and Peeta threw it over his back as he grabbed his canvas and easel in one hand and took my hand in his other. I held his art supply box as we slowly made our way towards the woods. To my pleasant surprise we didn't need to take a break at the meadow, but as we passed it I could help but imagine the little house Peeta had drawn. As he noticed me looking in that direction he smiled and asked where I wanted to go in the woods.
"Maybe near the lake?" I suggested.
"You sure you're up to it?" he asked.
I shrugged and nodded. Even if I wasn't, I wanted to go back there. He squeezed my hand and we continued walking towards the lake. While the pain slowly began to grow stronger, I grew more and more determined to make it to the lake. We eventually made it there and Peeta helped me climb up the side of the large rock where we had laid out and eaten only a few weeks ago. He spread out the blanket and helped me sit down following which he spread out his art things before sitting down next to me.
"Want me to help you take your shoes off?" he asked as he bent down towards my feet.
I nodded and bent to try and help without much success since bending my ankle too much hurt so badly. After he helped take my boots off I put them at the far edge of the rock and lay down. I rested my head on my hands and looked up in the sky. The sun wasn't too bright yet but I couldn't help but squint until it was too bright and I had to close my eyes. My heart was near exploding at the happiness I felt. Compared with the sadness that had overcome me recently, my heart felt at peace and overwhelming joy as I lay there in the sun listening to the mockingjays sing, smelled the pine trees and experienced the woods for the first time in what felt like a lifetime.
I opened my eyes to look over at Peeta who had been drawing and noticed he was painting the landscape before us but during the sunset. I sat up to get a better look at the drawing and noticed he had added something else to the scene; a little tent with a fire in front of it.
"What is that?" I said, startling him a little.
"Oh, just a little scene I imagined," he said, trying to brush off my question.
"Just a little scene?" I teased.
He laughed and took a moment to construct his response. "Well, kind of… I guess, no, not really," he replied. "I just really enjoy the lake. It's like a little sanctuary from everywhere else. No one else can come here, and I have fond memories of this place," he said, justifying his drawing.
I smiled back at him, "fond memories, eh?" I teased as I nudged him. He sat down and I bumped him in the shoulder and apologized, "I'm just kidding, Peeta. I agree. This was my secret spot until I brought you here."
"You mean you never brought Gale?" Peeta asked, surprised by the revelation.
I shook my head and took his hand. "No. I don't know that he would have appreciated it as much."
He looked at me and smiled while I stared off across the lake, imagining the tent and fire Peeta had created.
He eventually looked in the same direction as me and threw out a new idea, "We should camp out here some time."
My face lit up but I continued staring off and simply nodded in approval of his idea. He eventually let go of my hand and reached for our lunch. We spread it out before us on the blanket and Peeta and I shared our meal of rabbit sandwiches, carrots, berries, oatmeal cookies, and cold water. After our feast we lay down next to each other on the blanket and shaded our eyes as we stared up into the sky above us.
"You know," I began after a moment, "I can't remember the last time I was this happy." I said as I turned to Peeta.
He turned to face me and smiled. "I'm glad. I want you to be happy. More than anything else, I want you to be happy," he said as he brushed away the hair that had fallen into my face.
I scooted closer to him and turned my back to him, so I could face the lake, while we lay there in the sun with full bellies and smiles across our faces. I soon broke the silence again.
"Peeta, am I good to you?"
The thought had been weighing on my mind over the last day or so but had vanished when we set up our picnic here by the lake. I don't know why it had popped into my head again, but before I could stop myself, the words fell out of my mouth.
He squeezed me tight and pulled me close to him, kissing my ear as he softly said, "Of course you are. You are more than I could have ever hoped for."
"I just... I know we aren't on the same playing field, Peeta, but I still don't want to feel like I'm not good enough." I said, trying to explain myself.
He turned me to face him again and said with a very serious tone, "Katniss, who got us out of the Hunger Games alive? It wasn't me. Please stop thinking you're less than me or not deserving of me. I don't know why you should feel like that. You aren't like other girls waiting for others to save her. You saved me. Just because you need help every once in a while doesn't make you less of a person, it just makes you human. So let me help you since you've already helped me."
"But what about the bread? All the way back in the beginning when we were starving," I said.
"Well what about the song back when we were five years old? You gave me something to work for since that day," he shot back.
"But…" I began, trying to find another retort to his latest argument.
"Give up, Katniss," he said, jokingly, "this is an argument I'm going to win for once."
I spent the rest of the day relaxing on the rock and eating what remained of the cookies while Peeta painted some more scenes of the forest.
"If you can't get out here by yourself the least we can do is bring some of it back home," he explained as he began his second painting.
Towards the end of the day we began to grow hungry and pack up our things. By then the sun was beginning to set. But as Peeta reached for my feet to help me put my shoes back on I stopped him and tugged on his sleeve so he could look at what I saw. A beautiful sunset spread out over the trees. As the colors changed to a beautiful orange, it almost looked as though the trees were a glow. We froze with our necks craned up towards the sky and stayed in that position until it had faded.
The day had been perfect; the weather, the smells, the sounds. If there was a heaven I imagined it was like that day had been. We began walking back home and I was on an emotional high. As we made our way past the meadow, I stopped and pointed out to Peeta.
"There. Let's build a home right there."
He squeezed my hand and simply said, "I was waiting for you to say that."
