First off, I wanted to respond to a lot of people's comments about the last chapter. I know that some of the characters were acting childish. That was on purpose, and you were supposed to be mad at them for hurting Future Elena, but I hope to explain and make up for it with this chapter. This one is a lot lighter, and hopefully you guys like this one more than the last. That being said, I hope you all enjoy.
Future Elena's POV
After another night of restless sleep thinking about Klaus' impending arrival, I wake up to the sweet smell of maple syrup and pancakes wafting up the stairs. I can't imagine who could be cooking, since I am the only human currently residing in the boardinghouse, but I quickly throw on some respectable clothes and rush downstairs to satisfy my curiosity. I stop abruptly in the kitchen when I see the chef is none of than Damon. My feet feel glued to the floor and my whole body frozen in place. Describing the tension as awkward would be putting it mildly after last night. It's hard to get past the person that you love telling you that they wish they could send you away.
I resolve not to be the one to break the silence. I may not be angry per say for what he said to me last night, but I certainly am not going to beg for him to talk to me either. I do still have some self-respect, and I've done enough groveling this past week to last me a lifetime. Luckily, Damon saves us both from another second of weird, uncomfortable silence. "I'm not good at apologies," Damon claims without further preamble. "I am good at pancakes," he remarks with a cocky smirk, "so I figured slaving over a hot stove might serve as a form of contrition for my behavior the other night."
"Damon, you don't have to . . ."
"Yes, I do," Damon interrupts resolutely. "I was upset, at you and at the other you, and I was just lashing out. I didn't mean any of it," Damon swears.
"Oh, you meant all of it," I reply sadly, my head hanging down low as the words come out. "Your anger just gave you an excuse to say what you were really thinking, but I accept your apology and your pancakes," I state with a half-smile that doesn't quite reach my eyes. "I know you would never do anything to hurt me on purpose," I tell him earnestly, thinking of all the times Damon swooped in to protect me from harm. Damon smiles back at me warmly, but there is a tiny crack in his happy façade.
"Why do you have to be so understanding about all this?" Damon questions me half-jokingly. "Couldn't you at least throw some hot syrup in my face, pout, or yell, something to make me feel less crappy about myself?"
"There's really no need," I promise him as I reach for his hand to squeeze it reassuringly. "I've hurt you plenty of times, and I never showed up with a warmed up glass of blood as an apology, so I'd say we're even. Maybe last night was just my bad karma finally coming back to bite me." All the mistakes still haunt me. The events of the future seem to be the only things that I can't stop apologizing for, and the universe won't let me stop paying for them.
"That's a load of crap," Damon disagrees unexpectedly. "I'd say after all that you've suffered the karma scales are probably tipping in your favor. Last night was just me being an ass." I can't help, but break out in a wide smile at his rather spirited defense of my honor.
"Why don't we just agree to disagree, and I can eat these delicious smelling pancakes?" I offer sweetly, while sticking a big mouthful into my mouth.
"Deal," Damon agrees happily.
We eat in a comfortable silence as I devour my food. He simply watches me, while sipping his liquid breakfast and enjoying my expressions of approval at his cooking. After the last bite is gone, I gather up my things and prepare to leave.
"Where are you headed so early?" Damon inquires curiously. I still haven't told him about Klaus' impending visit, and I am trying to avoid it. If he feels I am in any danger, he will risk life and limb to keep me safe. I already watched him die once at Klaus' hands, and I have no desire to do it again, so I only disclose the first stop on my day's schedule.
"I'm headed over to my house to knock some sense into the younger, less intelligent version of myself," I reply with hint of sarcasm.
"Are you sure that is such a good idea after yesterday?" Damon questions skeptically.
"Absolutely, I wasn't afraid to piss her off before. I'm not starting now," I answer confidently, while swinging my bag over my shoulder.
"Best of luck," Damon offers sincerely, before breaking out his patented sarcasm. "Avoid sharp objects, don't get within shanking distance, and try to resist the impulse to yell when cornered."
"Thank you, I think. The apology pancakes were to die for," I compliment politely, and I'm almost out the door before I turn around to say one more thing. "Do me a favor and stay inside today," I request. "The other me still seems pretty pissed, and I don't want you to get into any more trouble." My lie seems believable enough, and I hope he doesn't push the issue any further. Damon doesn't need to get caught up in all of this.
"I'll do my best," Damon answers to my relief. I smile and wave goodbye.
Once I arrive at my house, I use the spare key to avoid the very real possibility of my past self answering and slamming the door in my face. I quietly walk up the stairs and walk into my room without invitation, and I see my past self sprawled out on the bed, writing furiously in her journal. She barely glances up before turning her eyes back to the pages and speaking coldly to me.
"If you're here to apologize, please just save it," my past self responds with an angry bite in her voice.
"Oh, I have no intention of apologizing," I respond, correcting her faulty assumption. "Last night I was all sad and remorseful, because you pushed just the right buttons to tap into my constant need to blame myself. I've had time to think about it, and I'm not sorry," I reply unapologetically. Elena's face contorts in shock and rage at my lack of guilt.
"Why are you here?" She demands, with increasing fury.
"I'm here to talk you about being a little crybaby bitch yesterday," I answer unabashedly. My past self just stares incredulously at my direction.
"Little harsh don't you think?" She asks, offended by my slight.
"From experience, I know we can be a little thick headed. I needed something extreme to get your attention."
"So you're just here to insult me?" She questions in an increasingly hostile voice, and I take a tiny step back, remembering what Damon said about shanking distance.
"No," I reply genuinely, losing the sarcasm in hopes of connecting to her once more. "I'm here to find out what you are so afraid of."
"I'm not afraid of anything," She responds defensively within seconds. Her answer was instantaneous, like it was a reflex or an automated response, and I'm not sure if even she believed her own words.
"Yes you are," I counter brilliantly, "and I know because I was scared all the time too. I was scared of feeling too much, losing too much, and along the way, I still lost the only things that ever mattered. I used my fear to push Damon away, just like you are. Watching the man you love die in front of your eyes helps clarify a lot of things. All the insecurities and fears didn't mean a damn once he was gone. Don't wait till it's too late to fight for him. You're using this spell as an excuse, the same way that you've been using me as an excuse for not being with him. I need to know what could be so scary that would make you walk away." After a moment of silence, where my past self studies me questioningly, I see her barriers break down once more.
"I gave my heart away without thinking once," she confesses truthfully. "I did it because I was lost and alone and I needed something to cling to. Stefan crushed it, and not just my heart, but my idealism, my innocence. I never thought that someone who truly loved me could hurt me like that. I already feel more for Damon just based on the past week than I ever did for Stefan, and that is terrifying. Maybe I'm just afraid that if I give my heart to Damon that he'll use it to destroy me."
A mountain of differences that separate us, and for the first time, I see myself in her. We're not so different. We fear the same things, loss, loneliness, and hurting the people that we love. I feel more connected to her than I ever have to anyone. I don't know if it is the effect of the spell, but I feel as if we are one person in this room together, and it brings me great peace. I grab her hand and take it in my own as I have done many times, since I've come back and I speak to her, trying to push away her doubts just with the sound of my voice.
"That's what an all-consuming love is," I explain wishfully. "It's giving your entire heart to another person and trusting that that they will guard it and keep it safe. Trust me; no one is a better protector of our heart than Damon. When Stefan left town in my future, Damon vowed to bring him home, not just because they were brothers, but because he thought it would make me happy. He was prepared to give his life to save Stefan because he wanted to give me whatever I wanted, even if it cost him everything he ever wanted. He protected me from the truth of Stefan's atrocities, of Stefan's victims. And every night when Stefan was gone, he would call me or stop over just to be sure that I would make it through another day. Damon kept me from crumbling. He made me strong, and he's the reason that I made it this far."
I recount all of Damon's great moments of heroism and strength, and I wonder how it ever could have taken me so long to tell him how I felt. I must have been deaf, dumb, and blind not to see it, especially when everyone else did. Luckily my past self has the benefit of my vast experiences, and she was learning, slowly but surely. Her voice broke me from my nostalgic musings.
"I'm sorry," she apologizes sincerely.
"Don't sweat it," I answer casually. "I'm already over our little spat the other day."
"No, not about that," she responds to my surprise. "I'm sorry that you lost the man who did all those things for you, because as close as my Damon is to that man, he's still not the same. You two don't have those same shared experiences, and I'm sorry that you can never get those back." I smile gratefully at her sentiment, but the expression is far too weak to last long on my face. I'm determined not to cry, break down, or let Elena feel sorry for me, so I put on a brave front.
"Being around your Damon helps," I admit truthfully. "At least I know he can finally have the future that he was meant for. I just wish that I could be there to see it," I answer regretfully, thinking how hard it will be to leave them all behind.
"You can," my past self replies instantaneously. "I know I overreacted, but if you want to stay, you can," she urges me pleadingly. I love her for saying it, but that would only complicate her life further, and I vowed not to be selfish.
"We both need to live our own lives again," I remind her sadly, "and we can't do that together, so I'm going to leave once things are settled here."
"Where?" She asks thoughtfully, clearly concerned for my future.
"There is an old friend that I hope won't mind the company, his name is Elijah, and I figure we could both use somebody."
"Are you sure that you'll be okay?" She double checks, uncertain how hard she should be fighting to keep me close.
"I'll be fine," I reassure her one last time. "That spell really did help me, because now at least I know that I'll have your positive blissful loving feelings to keep me warm and content at night."
She grabs me into a fierce embrace and I quickly relax into it. "Thank you for everything," she murmurs in my ear.
"You're welcome," I reply thankful that we can end on good terms. "So now that we've settled our differences, why don't you go apologize and tell the boy that you love how you feel," I not so subtlety advise.
"I still need some time to wrap her head around all of this," she confesses, "but I promise I will soon."
That's enough for me, so I don't push it further. The doorbell rings and I offer to answer it, since she is still wrapped up in covers. When I get to the door, no one is there. Only a note is left on the mat, and it has my name on it. I rip it open to find a tiny note inside.
Odd time of year for a family vacation, luckily, I intercepted your nearest and dearest on their way out of town yesterday. If you ever wish to see them again, you will meet me at the clearing by the falls at 8 o'clock. At 8:01, I will start slaughtering your loved ones every five minutes until you show or until you have no one left, whichever comes first. Arrive alone and tell no one.
Klaus
Fear grips me tighter than it has since I arrived back in town. They were supposed to be safe, but once again, my loved ones were at Klaus' mercy. I needed help. This story had to have a happier ending. It just had to, so I dialed the only person who I knew had enough strength to bring my family home. "Hello, Elijah," I answer in a panicky voice. "There's been a complication, and I need you."
As Always Please Read and Review
P.S. if you have time, check out xJessxxLovex's story called I Won't Give Up. It is short, but cute, and I think we all need a little bit of cute after the finale.