Disclaimer: These characters belong to S. Meyer; I just use them for my vivid imagination on the short bus.
All chapters are pre-written, so there are no edits done by a beta. All errors are my own.
I'm keeping things short and sweet, so thank you for all the kind words…
On we go…
-Leslie
April 12, 1997
Dear Abby Bean;
I do believe your father will be sporting a dent in the side of his head upon your arrival into this crazy, oversized world. I'm almost positive if I didn't love the man more than life itself, I would have done thrown something heavy at his head already. Than man has turned into a complete worrywart; I try very hard to remain focused on being patient with him, as neither of us has been in this situation before. Ever since the last visit to the doctor, he has become worrisome of my blood pressure. It was a little high during that visit and it has been normal ever since, but your father still worries; bless his heart.
Besides your father driving me batty with his unfounded concerns now, this has still been one of the greatest experiences in my life. Who knows if we'll be on this road again, after you're born, but I'm just thankful and blessed to have done it at least once. If the time comes when we think you need a sibling and we can't conceive, we can always adopt. Adoption is a wonderful process as well. There are always children out there, whom need loving parents as well. Blood doesn't make you family; what makes you a family is the love you hold for the other.
So, I suppose I should grant you with another memory for you to cherish later in your life.
April Fool's Day. A day for random acts of craziness.
Victim: The Dad himself.
The man absolutely loathed for someone to mess with his settings on his phone, computer, remote, etc. You get the drift.
The start of the day began in the wee hours of the a.m.; I knew that my arsenal of tricks would have him ready to kill a person by the end of the day.
It started with the alarm clock beside the bed. I had waited for him to go to sleep before I snuck back out of the bed and set the clock to go off at different intervals of time. Next, good old duct tape became my best friend.
Your father had been asleep for no more than forty-five minutes before the clock began to blare. I suppressed my laughter as your father jumped in fright and tried to turn off the offending noise. He quickly realized that the clock was not in its designated place, so he groaned and got out of the bed in search of his beloved alarm clock. His search was fruitless, having been able to find it before it silenced itself for the time being.
Remember, I lay in bed pretending to be asleep and not hearing the loud noise.
He huffed to himself, scratched his head before chalked it up as he was sleep walking. Then he proceeded to climb back in bed where he quickly drifted off to sleep again.
The night continued just the same; he would doze back off for an hour before the blaring would start up again, waking him from his light slumber. I didn't feel the faintest bit ashamed for playing such a cruel trick on him, considering the jokes he had pulled on me the following year.
Not once, in all his times being awoken just to have the clock go silent before he could find it, did he ever look up to the ceiling. There, in the upper right hand corner of the room, the exact place where I had duct taped the alarm.
Of course, by morning he was a supreme crouch. I got a full blown stink eye when it was time for us to head in for work that morning. Poor guy, he thought I was done with him for the day, boy was he wrong. He even praised me for the ultimate prank when he found the alarm taped to the ceiling in the lit room that morning.
He had a fake appointment scheduled that afternoon, but did he know it was a fake? No. Well, not until he actually arrived at the designated meeting place that day. Yes, I screwed up his directions, leaving him to drive straight to a lake of ducks. Of course you know that the ducks played a meaningful part in a stressful situation, so I figured a little laugh would do him some good during all the pranking that the day entailed.
Once he arrived back at the office, highly annoyed and somewhat amused, he once again praised me for yet another prank gone well.
Your dad then proceeded on with the rest of his day. It took him quite a while to realize the subtle things I had screwed up that day.
One of my close friends had married an 'IT' guy, one who knew his computers well. Truly, the man was a genius. I had spoken to him several months prior, asking him if several things were even possible, which he quickly assured me that he could do anything that I wanted. He thought my ideas were brilliant and he was up to the task.
Who knew one man could create something thought up by some lawyer who knew next to nothing about computers. He had created a wireless remote, one that allowed me to have complete control over several different devices at one time.
One button would cause his cell to ring, only to have him be greeted with static each time he answered. The next button would cause his computer to haywire; blinking and resetting. Another button switched the digital clocks backwards or forwards. It was utter chaos in his little world that day.
By that evening, your father was at his wit ends, ready to tear his hair out from the roots. At dinner that night, he deemed me the April Fool's Day queen of pranks and agreed he would never prank me again.
Words of Wisdom: Never let someone out prank you. Be for certain that you will forever be the queen of pranks. Don't become a stick in the mud, have fun and live life to the fullest.
Love,
You Momma
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