CHAPTER 2

April walked in to the locker room to change before heading back to her apartment. It has been a long shift to say the least. She was ready to sleep for a week if she could. As she opened her locker to change out of her scrubs, she found a note on the bottom next to her flats. Whoever left it must have slipped it through the top of the locker. April froze when she flipped over the note. She'd know that handwriting anywhere. It was from Jackson. Deciding on reading the note later and the privacy in her apartment, April proceeded to change and darted out the door.

After washing the dishes, April settled on her couch and opened the note from Jackson.

Putting this in writing made more sense to me than talking to you in person. I wanted to but when I tried that before you shut me down and didn't give me a chance.

We have hurt each other along the way April. Took a lot of things for granted but never our friendship. You were always there and I missed that. I missed just seeing you outside work like how it used to be. I know we can't go back to how it was before. Where did we get everything messed up? I never regretted what happened in San Francisco. That made me looked at you differently. Like something just snapped in my head that you were more than a friend. When you left after the plane crash, I wasn't myself. Mark told me before he died that I should tell you before it's too late. Hopefully it's not too late yet April.

I love you April. I think I have been in love with you since before San Francisco. I don't know when it started. Even my mom was surprised that I have had you as a friend longer than the girlfriend I used to date. Heck even Karev noticed that I worry about you too much but not towards the others.

I would rather live with the pain knowing that I told you I love you rather than keeping it to myself while I try to move on. We both know the pregnancy scare was a breaking point for us. Know that I would have supported you either way not because I had to but I wanted to and I still do.

We have come in leaps and bounds over the years. Whether we continue on together or separately, we will always have the beautiful memories of a friendship we have created.

-Jackson—

April curled herself and cried. He was right. They both hurt each other along the way. They were like Meredith and Derek once before. Meredith had told her that she and Derek wasted so much time apart and that they both exhausted themselves. Meredith advised her to not make the same mistakes with Jackson. She had tried to deny it but Meredith knew better. All the look of longing across the room or at the mention of his name there's a small sparkle in her eyes.

She really couldn't believe what was happening with her life. Before she would have trouble to even have one guy look at her and now there's two. She would have to decide and soon. Stringing Matt along is not fair to him and herself, to all three of them really.

Her thoughts were interrupted at the shrill of her phone on her coffee table.

"Hello?"

"Hey April, it's Matt. Listen, we need to talk. Are you free tomorrow?"

"Yea….yeah I am. In the morning. Meredith asked for my help with the nursery and I'll be meeting her after lunch. I mean I can cancel that. I'm sure she wouldn't mind."

"No, that's fine. I'll meet you say 9 at the café? If that's a good time for you." Matt sounded torn.

"That sounds good. Matt…I'll see you then." She felt like an idiot. By the sound of his voice, Matt was upset about something and she wouldn't know until tomorrow morning. Meeting Matt for dates these days is like calling your doctor for appointments. She will have to sleep soon and hopefully feel rested enough to start her day tomorrow.