To the unnamed person who commented on food- To be perfectly honest, the only Spanish food I ever had was paella, and that came from an American cooking site. As a matter of fact, in one episode, Romano woke Spain up, asking for him to make him breakfast. If Romano is anything like Veneziano, he wouldn't eat anything that tastes bad. As for British food, I read that the food there is plain because the food culture was more… frugal. What could you use animal blood for, other than blood sausage? Haggis may sound bad, but I think it was the Scot's way of conserving the edible organs. Taste, I guess, was never a high priority. I've never had Dutch food, so I don't know what it tastes like. As for Russian food, look how cold it is there!
Note- I'm sorry! I forgot that at this point, Zoro only has two swords! I'll patch up that error, ja?
Poll results- as promised, I will break the tie. Votes: Zoro, Ussop, and Sanji each got 2. Chopper and Robin both got 1.
Chapter 33 (Sealand POV)
"… Zoro," said Nami. "You three are fighting Zoro."
Zoro? The bloke with green hair and three swords? He looks strong…
Romano glared at me, as if to say, 'This is all your fault.'
Italy was clinging to Romano as he usually did in danger. Admittedly, I was sort of afraid, but I got us into this, and I could get us out. Besides, I had a plan.
"I have a plan," I told them.
Romano spat. "You better have one," he said bitterly.
I leaned in anyway and told them the plan. "… so then you hit that spot!"
Romano was almost surprised. "Dat plan is not bad," he said.
"Ve~ but you have to work hardest," said Italy.
"I'll be okay," I said. As long as I'm made of metal, I could stand a sword strike.
"Attention!" called Germany. "Ze rules vill change for zis fight. Vhile Zoro has von spot to paint, only von of you vill be painted. You vill be ze target."
I looked at Romano. Italy looked at me. Romano looked at his brother.
"You'd probably be the best target for our plan," I said to Italy.
"V-ve~?!"
Romano tried to stand between us, but he was a little short. "I-I'll do it."
Italy shook his head. "Ve~ the plan makes it better for me to go."
Romano nodded. "We are ready, Potato Jerk!"
He nodded. "Eins, zwei, deri, vier, PAINT!"
Italy stuck some on his back, and so did Zoro. "BEGIN!"
I rushed at Zoro. Seeing an opening, he slashed at me with the backs of all three swords. Just how I expected, I thought. I blocked his strikes with my arms, which were made of metal like the rest of my body. Seeing his eyes widen in confusion, I caught all three of his swords-
And promptly let go. Two of them were normal, but the last one, the white one, was-
I could sense the emotions in metal. That was my final gift upon becoming a personified. As I was made of metal, I could always sense the residual emotions from metal. Whenever any kind of metal was used when the user was feeling a strong emotion, the emotion passed on to the metal. Metal with emotions are… well, no one else has a word for it, so I say that it is hot. The stronger the emotion, the warmer it becomes, until I can't hold on to it at all [1]-
Z-Zoro's white sword… it had the most intense 'aura' I've ever felt… I couldn't hold onto it!
"V-ve?!" Italy! If I couldn't hold on to Zoro's swords, he couldn't hold him down! My plan was that I seal Zoro's swords, Italy seals his movement, and Romano strikes the paint!
Italy grabbed Zoro anyway. I grabbed his other two swords, which I could actually hold on to. "Ve~ fratello!"
Romano rushed in, but Zoro struck back with the white sword. Thwack~! He flipped Italy with a one-armed shoulder throw, and lightly struck his back. "VE~~~~~!"
"Zoro, vins!" Germany said quickly. "Now vould you please hold still for a moment?"
Zoro- he had his hand caught into Italy's hair curl. No wonder it hurt so much… "Don't you touch it, Potato Jerk!" Romano yelled. He somehow managed to untangle it without messing it up.
He glared angrily at me. "Why did you let go of his sword, huh, Sailor Jerk?!" he yelled in Italian.
"I'll explain later," I said, avoiding the issue as much as possible. It would take too long, after all. But Zoro gave me a suspicious look. I guess it's because I blocked his swords without getting hurt too badly…
"Vell, all zat eeiz left eeiz to prepare for ze voyage," said Germany. "Ve vill meet at ze inn at 1945 hours!" he declared. "Dismissed!"
Geez… it's not like we're a military or anything. Even as a child, he's as strict as ever…
"Hey," said Zoro. "I want to talk to you."
Well, I couldn't say that I wasn't surprised. "I can explain everything. Well, not everything, but-"
He grabbed me and dragged me towards the town. "How did you defend against my swords?" he asked. "All three of them were solid, sharpened steel. And out of the three, the only one that you didn't seem to be able to touch was Kuina's. The other two I bought, one was a high-class sword, and the other was a cheap one that I got from the local smithy. Why hers?"
"Who's Kuina?" I asked.
He was silent. Must be someone he lost, long ago…
To change the subject, I began my explanation. "My body's made of metal," I blurted out. It was stupid of me, but what else could I do?
Zoro looked at me for a long time. He tapped my hand. "Doesn't sound like metal," he said.
"It's almost impossible to tell when I'm not being hit by something or… during special circumstances, like with the metal detector," I explained.
"Metal detector?"
"Remember when I got shot? Chopper used a metal detector to get all the bullets out, but it still had a signal from my body. That's what I mean by special," I finished. "Can I go now?"
He walked off towards the mountains. "The town is that way!" I shouted.
"I knew that!" he yelled as he walked off towards the forest. Well, I'd better get going, I thought. I like being in towns and cities, even though I don't actually have any to call my own. I guess I just like being with other people…
I explored the town as much as I possibly could, finding all sorts of shops. Tea shops, book shops, sweet shops, even a magic shop. I bought a chocolate bar from the sweet shop, using jerk-England's money, and walked around aimlessly.
"Hey, you!" a boy about my age called. He was covered in bandages, and bruised all over. "Yeah, you!"
"What is it?" I asked. A kid at the head of a gang of other kids can never mean anything good, but I had to ask. They were surrounding me, but most of them were injured, and I was sure that I could fight much better than they could.
"We're here to beat you up!" he announced.
"And you challenged how many other people?" I asked. "You're covered in bandages."
His gang shifted uncomfortably, but he stood up tall. "Bandages are a mark of valor!"
"Or idiocy," I said bitingly. Jerk-Arthur's personality really rubbed off on me…
"Hey! All we did was challenge that tall kid with the scarf, and he beat us with a weapon! A pipe is cowardly!"
"You fought Russia!?" I said. "You're lucky he let you live…"
"And Tifa? She beat us up bad…" one of the members muttered. "That girl changed a lot since that guy with the funny accent grabbed her…" [2]
"Don't forget that little kid with the glasses that you tried to fight to prove you were stronger!" another announced.
"How could I have known about his monster strength?!" a kid with a broken arm shouted. "He threw me at least fifty feet!"
"America too?" I asked dryly. Those kids were brave, stupid, or suicidal. Mabe all three…
"Don't forget that kid with the weird accent! He beat all of us up!"
Weird accent? "How was it weird?" I asked. It must have been his defining feature…
"He pronounced his th's like d's and t's, and he couldn't say the letter w!" one called.
I had no idea who that could have been. "So, why me?" I asked. "Are you just going around trying to beat up every single kid in the town?"
"Yeah!" the leader announced. "Or at least until we can beat someone up."
"You're all bloody idiots."
The leader tried to punch, but I headbutted him in the nose. Before he could strike back, I held him in a head lock like Sve showed me. "How's that?" I asked.
"I- you win," said the leader. As I walked away, he shouted, "My name is Kay, and you'll pay for this!"
"If you say so!" I shouted back sarcastically. Before they could retaliate, I ducked into an alleyway and hopped onto the rooftops. I ate my chocolate in peace up there. Jerk-Arthur would have yelled at me for not eating lunch first, but I just like chocolate. Eight hours until departure? I have plenty of time to do what I have to do…
X
At 7:00 sharp, we all happened to gather at the inn for dinner. As usual, there was a huge ruckus. Russia drank more and more vodka, cumulating in his heart falling out. Chopper freaked out, but Russia just stuck it back in. Italy wore the maid dress throughout the entire meal, so at least twenty drunk men tried to hit on him. Germany slapped a few of them to their senses. Austria ended up sewing most of their clothes. Even their underwear… Spain almost thrust an axe into a drunken man's head when he tried to hit on Austria (I've never been drunk, so I have no idea why he thought that). Nami challenged Germany to a drinking contest, which she lost. Germans and lager… beer… I heard that that's all Germany and Prussia ever drink, unless they can't get any. Nami didn't stand a chance…
After we ate, we were due to leave in ten minutes. Luffy ran off, saying something about meat.
Zoro, who was first mate, asked us if we were going to sail on their ship or our ship. "We're going on ours, but someone has to man yours."
"I… would like to stay on our ship," said Japan.
China smiled, and said, "I would also like to stay with Japan!"
Russia smiled, and said that he wanted to stay on their ship. America glared, and said that he wasn't going to stay on the same ship as him. Canada tagged along with America, and France went with Canada. Jerk-England wasn't going to be on the same ship as France, so he was with the Straw Hats. I went with him, just in case. Austria wanted to be on an actual ship, and Germany decided to keep him company. The Italy brothers liked ships, and Spain wanted to be with Romano. So everyone except for America, Canada, Japan, China, and France ended up on the pirate's ship. Well, if they mess anything up on my land, at least I'll know. They ran back to my land, while we boarded the Thousand Sunny, or whatever their ship was called.
"STRAW HAT!" someone yelled. I turned around, and Luffy was running from a huge man smoking three cigars. Luffy launched himself onto the ship.
"What the bloody hell just happened?!" jerk-England shouted.
"This happens a lot," said Zoro. "That guy's a Marine, who hunts pirates."
I pulled the pin of a grenade, and tossed it overboard. BOOM! The Marine staggered back from the explosion, but still advanced.
"Be quiet! I um tlying to read!" A-Austria?! Only you would say such a thing at this time… The Marine was distracted long enough for us to cast off.
"Hah…" jerk-England panted. "N-now I remember…"
"Remember what?" asked Ussop.
"I… was talking to a man…" he began, struggling to hold on to that memory, "He was just talking to a wizard… I came… though the window… gave him an inspirational speech… and told him to go get a machine gun. [3]"
"A what?" asked Chopper.
"A machine gun… fires repeating rounds… takes up a lot of ammunition…" he muttered. About time he remembered his boss…
"Did you say that he was talking to a wizard?" asked Luffy. "How did you know he was a wizard? Did he pull a rabbit out of a hat?"
"No, but he let his fish, Mr. Giggles, die because he neglected to feed it for a month," said jerk-England randomly. He paused. "And I don't even remember how I knew that in the first place."
"You vill remember," Austria reassured him. "You should. You vere ze von who brought us here eein ze first place!"
"I-I'm sorry…"
So Austria's still mad at jerk-England? Can't say I blame him…
X (much, much later…)
Both of our ships sailed side-by-side with a rope connecting us, giving us passage between their Thousand Sunny and my land. Even Austria and I, the weakest, could climb the gap with ease with the aid of the rope. Seeing at the Thousand Sunny was steering, all of us were on board of it. "Hey, guys, look!" Nami yelled, and pointed straight ahead. "Fog's rolling in, we have to stay on guard!"
Franky peered at the mist, and at a map. "This place is legendary… You sailed here, too, right Arthur?"
Jerk-England shook his head. "I came close, but we turned back at the last minute. I forgot why I had to leave, though…"
"This is the Florian Triangle," said Franky dramatically. "Ships lose their course mysteriously here, and entire fleets vanish."
"Monsters live here~" Luffy teased Ussop.
"I heard there are living skeletons," shuddered Nami.
Ussop and America hugged each other and screamed. "Th-that's bad, isn't it?!" Ussop panicked.
"IGGY!" America flung himself onto jerk-England, and hugged him so tight that I could hear his ribs shatter.
"Good lord, it's only a couple ghosts," said jerk-England, peeling America off of him and holding him at arm's length. "Is is because on every Halloween when you were little I used to summon demons?"
America shuddered. That must have been some childhood… A loving older brother for most of the year, who dabbles in witchcraft every day and hates your twin brother's caretaker… I can imagine why America rebelled…
"Summon demons?!" screamed Ussop. "Are you crazy?!"
"He vonce summoned me by accident," said Russia. "He vas trying to call on ze devil."
Yo…Ho… Someone was singing… "You hear that?" I asked. "Someone's… singing…"
"I-it's a ghost ship!" America clung to jerk-England so hard that he vomited blood.
Everyone, except for jerk-England, Russia, and Austria freaked out. "YAAA!"
"Hey, there's a rope ladder leading up to the top!" yelled Luffy. "Let's go climb it!"
Nami slapped him. "Fine, but if we get cursed, it's your fault!"
"Hello."
"GYAAH!" Th-that was a skeleton! Talking! With an afro!
"Hello!" jerk-England called. "How are you?!"
"D-dlop your weapon and I will not exorcize you!" Japan squealed, suddenly wearing monk's clothing. Ever hear Japan squeal? That's about as shocking as hearing France say that he loves scones. Or Russia saying that he hates vodka.
"Oh, come off it," jerk-England said, pushing aside Japan's kanji-engraved katana. "It's all right, he's-"
Spain leaped to the top of the ship, and bashed the skeleton with a small crucifix. "O-OW!"
"El poder de Cristo te obliga!" Spain yelled. (The power of Christ compels you, in Spanish.)
"Won't you bloody stop?!" jerk-England kneed Spain in the head. "Sorry about that," he apologized to the skeleton. "He's… like that a lot."
"Hmph," Romano grunted. "You haven't lived with him for… years."
"Hello! I'm Brook!" shouted the skeleton. "You're a cute girl; will you lend me some money?"
It took me all of five seconds to realize that he was talking to Italy. "V-Ve?!"
"Fratello's male!" Romano shouted.
"I… do not have very much money…" Italy said. "But I can show you my-" (Art, he means to say art).
"Will you show me your panties?!" Brook asked Nami next.
"No."
"Will you become part of my crew?" asked Luffy.
"Okay," replied Brook.
"Th-that was fast!" everyone but Robin, Austria, Russia, and jerk-England shouted.
"Hi, I'm Luffy," said Luffy.
"Let's have dinner on board your ship!" yelled Brooks.
"Okay."
That… was strange. Luffy was a far cry from what you'd call normal, but this was stretching the limits.
X
"…so you're all from another world, some of you were de-aged, you were a pirate here twenty years ago, and you lost your memories?" asked Brook.
"Yeah, that just about sums it up," said jerk-England, one of the few who could actually talk to him.
"And you are a skeleton because of a devil fruit, and your shadow vas stolen?" asked Russia.
"Yes."
"Hey, look!" I shouted. "It's an island!"
"Th-that's-!"
X (Figure POV… fine, it's Hungary)
"So, Héderváry," asked Tashigi. "Why did you want to join us all of a sudden?"
I looked at the sky. "D-dere is somevone I vant to see… and he vas on dat ship."
Tashigi put her hand on my shoulder sympathetically. She probably thought he was a prisoner or something… "He is not a prisoner," I said. "He…I have no idea vhy he was on dat ship, but I vill find out."
"Look sharp, crew!" shouted Commodore Smoker. "We're here to investigate this island- Thriller Bark!"
X (meanwhile, in Norway)
"You too?" asked Norway.
The girl in front of him nodded.
"Fine, but whatever you do, don't touch-"
FOOM!
"She touched it."
TO BE CONTINUED!
[1] Sealand's ability with metal- explained earlier, and used in my other active fic, 'So why do we have a Firebender on our team again?' It's an Avatar:TLA/Hetalia x-over. The Baltics, England, Sealand, Prussia, and Canada end up in the Avatar universe, where they join team Avatar and acquire Bending.
[2] Tifa, the girl- Tifa Lockheart is a character from Final Fantasy VII. She is a martial artist, who apparently was inspired by Hungary…
[3] England, his boss, machine gun, wizard, and Mr. Giggles the dead fish- All events from 'The man of 42 seconds later', three Harry Potter/Hetalia one-shots. England meets the Prime Minister from Harry Potter, right after he meets Fudge.
Finally back on some semblance of a plot! It's been too long…
Help! I need somebody! I know absolutely nothing about European history, other than what Hetalia presents and what I learned in school (I am American!). Please, if you could, tell me anything you know about History, especially what relates to the characters I gave!
Who is that girl? Will the Marines and the pirates collide? And when will Kay learn his lesson?