Rose of Jericho

by peterpauper

Would we laugh at gilded butterflies? Sequel to Chrysanthemum.

36. Chapter 34

-

Chapter 34

-

The thing about having a pool is to actually swim in it. Yuuki didn't know if she'd ever swum in her pool. She'd put her feet in it. And swum in other people's pools, at the beach, in lakes; but never in her own pool. Kyoya swam in it. Every other day fore exercise.

Yuuki sat one day with her feet in the water and a book in one hand. Her husband leant on the edge beside her. "Is Suetonius really that interesting?"

She paused to look at him. "It's the Twelve Caesars. Of course it's interesting."
"Are you learning things?" He said with a smug tone.

"Did you know..." Yuuki shifted slightly. "...that Emperor Caligula gave his horse a marble stable, its own set of servants and a fully furnished house so it could entertain?"
"He's the guy who ordered an entire army on an illogical exercise to 'invade Britain', got to the crossing and told all his soldiers to pick up seashells?"

"Yes. So?"
"He was completely insane."

Yuuki pondered this a moment. "No. I won't argue with that." Pause. "He was sort of evil to."
"Just sort of."
"Yes." She shut her book. "Just sort of."

Kyoya shook his head and sent a thin spray of water through the air. His wife tried to protect herself with the book and then decided to protect the book and both ended up damp. Her husband told her to put it down.

"Why?" The girl asked cautiously, clutching her prize.

"Because. I told you to. Put it down."
"No."
"Yuuki."
"Tell me why."
"Because, if you don't, it's getting wet." He grabbed her foot so she couldn't get out while she still could.

"No." Yuuki pointed a warning at him. "No. Don't." She was in a half crouch, trying to balance on the foot that had got out of the pool in time. "Kyoya. No."

"You've never been in this pool."
"No. This is a good shirt. I like this shirt."
"It will dry."
"It runs."

"No it doesn't."

Pause. "No...it doesn't. But I like these shorts. Their denim."
"So?"
"They shrink in water."
"You've washed them before." He pointed out.

"Yes. And they shrank."
"Then so did you because they fit the same."
Running out of arguments. "I did my hair."
He raised his eyebrow. "In a ponytail."
"I had my nails done."
"Their dry and water proof."
"I had my toenails done."
"You already got them wet."
"I..." She paused to think for a moment.

Kyoya pulled backwards. Yuuki cried out in surprise and tried to hang onto the edge of the pool but ended up slipping off it and into the water. Her husband was laughing. "Well, your hair is dry."

She pulled her elastic out and flicked it at him. Missed. Started to wade towards the edge.

Kyoya grabbed the back of her shirt and pulled her into him.

"No. No. Oh my gosh, you're freezing." Yuuki tried to walk away, but it's difficult when you're dressed.

The man trapped her with his arm around the bottom of her ribcage. "I'm not freezing. Its summer."

She was freezing. Like ice in her demeanour. "Not happy. Not happy. Not happy."

He kissed the hallow behind her ear. "Better?"
"No."
He pressed his mouth to a point just lower. "And now?"
Pause. "No." Her tone was slightly lighter, but her arms were firmly crossed.

Kyoya did the same thing again, but in a trail down the side of her neck. "Now?"

Yuuki hesitated. "...no." She said quietly.

"Why?" Her husband said against her ear.

"It's cold. It's wet."

"I thought you liked England?"
"Oh haha."

Kyoya laughed lowly. "We have a spa."
The girl repeated the statement in a mocking manner.

"You use that at least."
"It's bubbly." Yuuki said her tone now happier.

"Mm."

The woman looked at her book. "It's damp..." She moved forward and dragged her husband behind her.

He didn't let her go. "Don't touch it. It'll just make matters worse."
There was a long silence. "You know how what's mine is yours and what's yours is mine?"
"...yes."
"Well, does that mean the towel is mine?"
"We got a prenup."

"For financial stability. In case someone sues you. So it's only in theory. In reality, that towel is mine."

"Yes, but what is yours is mine."
"No..."

"Yes." He mocked.

"But its blue. My favourite colour is blue."
"It's navy."
"You like it when I wear navy."
"You bought me that navy shirt."
Pause. "...in theory..."

Kyoya smiled complacently. "Well. I guess you owe me then."

Yuuki twisted. "What? Why?"
"Because, you lied. I think everyone knows you bought that shirt for yourself."
"Yes. No." She shook her head. "I bought it so you would wear it."

"It's my towel."

"I'm going to drown you." Yuuki turned around fully and wrapped her legs around the back of his before pulling backwards.

Kyoya didn't move. "Fail."
She pulled against his knees. "Drown, damn it."

Her husband kissed her while she was preoccupied with killing him.

Yuuki protested for about a second and then decided that his idea was better than hers. "You're still dead."
"For pulling you in the pool?"
"Yes."

"You look good wet."
"Shut up."
He put on a shocked face. "What? You do."
"Shut up."
"Okay." He kissed her again.

"I don't get it." Came a familiar voice from the poolside.

The couple turned around. Or, Kyoya turned around. Yuuki now couldn't see who was there. She could guess though by the tone of his voice. It was a little defensive, business like. "What's not to get?"
There was a recognisable laugh. "Well. If you're going to do that to my sister, please use a lot of chlorine next time you clean your pool. I mean...my kids swim in that sometimes. Come on guys."

Yuuki peeled Kyoya's hands off her and splashed him so she could get away. "Mako, what did I say about knocking?"
"You were thirteen."
"Ah. If you remember that I was thirteen, then the rule still applies."
Kyoya wiped the water out of his eyes. He could see, but not clearly for very far. "Well, I think it's more the timing of our friends than anything else."
Mako leant against the door. "Sorry." He didn't sound it. "Anyway. Why I'm here."
"Without a key." His sister said flatly and pulled herself out of the pool and sat like a soggy mess on the edge.

"Yes. Anyway." He dismissed the statement and looked at Kyoya. "I need some wire."
Kyoya pointed at his wife. She was the one to talk to about that.

Yuuki scowled. "It's in the stable. Why?"
"Bought the kid a pony. Being Mr-Fix-it and building the pen."
"She's like...one and a half."
"How old were you?"
"Irrelevant."

"I also brought this." Mako put a DVD case on a deck chair. "For your enjoyment." He saluted casually and said goodbye before heading down the school.

Kyoya was floating his hands on top of the water. Yuuki was trying to squeeze her hair. "You know, witches float like that."

"Oh, really?" He got the look he had before again. "Let's test that theory."

"No." Yuuki stood up as quick as she could. "No." Pause. "That's mean."

Her husband splashed her. She took his towel and put it in the spa as she walked past. "Oi!" Kyoya climbed out of the pool. "My towel."
"No." Yuuki poked her tongue at him. "My towel."

The man lifted it out of the lukewarm water and hung it over the back of a chair. "Why wet it?"
"Yuuki's rules."

"Huh." Kyoya put his tongue in his cheek. His wife slipped inside. "You're getting the floor wet."
"It will dry."
"The wood will shrink."
"It gets mopped, it doesn't shrink."
"De'ja'vous."

Yuuki shook her head in an amused manner and walked through the house. She knew that her bathrobe was in the dryer, so she took it out and put her wet clothes into the washer. By the time she was back into the rest of the house, the floor was wet. "Kyoya, keep swimming pool outside." She called, not knowing where he was.

"I am outside." He called back. He was watching Mako drive away with a spiel of wire.

Yuuki stared at the floor. "Hmm..." At least the maid wouldn't have to mop it when she came around the next day.

Quite suddenly, Kyoya wasn't outside anymore. "Yuuki's rules, right?"
"No. Just Yuuki's mess." She said lightly, one arm crossed against herself, the other lifted so she could tap her chin. "See, denim carries a lot of water."
"Where is it now?"
"In the washer."
"With the shirt that runs?" He said smugly.

Yuuki scowled at him genially. "Yes. And your white work shirt."

"Ah. So it's going to be a pale shade of blue now?"
"No...probably not."
Kyoya stepped over the pool of water and ended up inches from Yuuki. "That robe is warm."
"Just out of the dryer."
"Its summer."
"So?"
"So, it's too warm." He said, hovering around her.

"Prove it."

Kyoya kissed his wife. Ardently. Poignantly. Water dripped from his hair onto her face and warmed gently in the places where it met his breath. "Proved?"

Yuuki wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her mouth against his. Point proved.

It had been four weeks since his father's death, and it had had little impact on their lives. For a week, Kyoya had been deep in thought. For a week, his wife had sat beside him and waited for him to return, not to her, but to himself. After that initial week, there had been a week of tension that floated around their world, but never entered it. His mother wanted the house. She got it. His brothers wanted the cars. They got them. His sister wanted the beach cottage. She got it. But they all felt as he had. As if, somewhere along the way, they had missed something important. The only difference was; Kyoya had Yuuki. She let him breathe through grief. Other couples would have asked questions constantly, given encouraging looks, hugged a little deeper. But Yuuki didn't. She knew that those things reminded one that something had happened and gave them reason to be sad again. Of course, she comforted her husband, but she gave him space and came to him when he called. She personalised his comfort to what was going to help him the best. Not what the world said would help him.

And because of that, there was more reason to appreciate the other. It was never for themselves, but it came back to them. To give joy without expecting anything but the contentment that giving it brought ensured that one received what they gave, tenfold. It was a gift. That only they could give. And only to each other. Support and care and a manifestation of love.

-

I know they wanna come and separate us but they can't do us nothin
Your the one I want and I'm a continue lovin
Cause your considered wify and I'm considered husband
And I'm a always be there for you
Cause she gonna hold it down, cant no body tell her nothin
You got the kind of love that always make up after fussin
And that's what gets me closer to yougo by things are gettin harder
Stickin together forever, watch you grow stronger
That's the way it has to be, everything problem
Keepin it always true(Be with you, Akon)

Seems like every day that

And no one knows
What I'm into you
Cause you'll never know what its like to walk in our shoes
And no one know, the things we've been through
Can never measure up to half of what I put you through
That's why we'll break through

You are everything in my life see the joy you bring
And ain't no one I compare you to
And I know that you will never walk away from me no matter what
And that's why I plan to do the same thing for you
And I want you to know

-

Yuuki got home after a day at the youth home and pulled herself into the lounge. There was a message on the phone. The girl sat down heavily and pressed the play button. Tamaki's perky voice filled the air.

"Kyoya! Yuuki! Hello! How are you?" Long pause. "Anyway. Seeing as you're not home, I'm going to leave a message." Yuuki rolled her eyes and smiled slightly as she sorted through the mail. "There's a marriage course on this weekend. You guys should come with Haruhi and I." Pause. "If you don't, then we'll need you to baby sit. Suki is going. So yes. Please, please, please come!" Expectant pause. "Call me." Click.

Yuuki actually laughed and opened a letter. Water bill. Boring. Electricity bill. Boring. Phone bill. Boring. She knew that she was part of a small percentage that found bills ignoring and didn't have to be rushed to hospital to get her heart restarted over them. In the end, the girl plugged her iPhone into a new set of speakers. The old ones had gone upstairs because she'd decided that listening to music in the bath was a fantastic idea. Kyoya said she'd electrocute herself. They'd stayed upstairs anyway.

Yuuki lay with her back on the couch and her legs dangling over the arm. Sometimes it was good to do absolutely nothing. People tell you to do something with your life all the time. But sometimes doing nothing was great.

"What are you doing?" Came a welcome voice from the doorway.

"Absolutely squat." Yuuki smiled slightly and examined the lights in the ceiling. She and her husband often arrived home in mid to late afternoon. Thanks to the comfort of their lifestyle, they could afford to get away early. She usually an hour or so before him.

"But you're lying down..." Kyoya knew how to talk. He just didn't know how to talk middle class.

"No." The girl propped herself onto her elbows. "I meant nothing. But that was obviously too advanced for you."

Her husband frowned, understanding but not appreciating. He pulled her legs off the arm of the chair and moved her so there was enough room for him to sit down. "Hello." He said cheerily before picking up the paper on the coffee table and pulling to the finance page.
Yuuki protested against this act and showed her defiance by putting her legs across his lap and crushing the paper. "Ha."
Kyoya pushed his glasses up. "Good day?"
She had his attention. "Until Tamaki left his message."
"Mm?"
"He invited us to a marriage course." Her tone became sarcastic. "Because that's totally awesome. Where all the awesome couples and tell of their awesome love and everyone is just awesome."

Kyoya smiled some. "Maybe we should go."
"Why?" Yuuki was a little confused. She sat up and crossed her legs so that she was facing him.

"To tell all the awesome couples about are awesome love and it'll just be awesome." He mocked. He didn't want to go either.

"Awesome." Pause. "Overused adjective. Pick another."
Kyoya kissed her lightly hello. "You pick."
"Stupendous." Yuuki grinned in victory.

There was a long silence. Her husband scowled. "What is this song?"
"Barry Louis Polisar, All I Want Is You." Yuuki took the remote for the player before he could change the song. "It's cute."
"Uhuh." He'd get the remote.

"If I was a flower growing wild and free, all I'd want is you to be my sweet honey bee." The girl didn't sing. She couldn't sing for her life. But she spoke it sweetly and with an odd lilt. "And if I was a tree growing tall and green all I'd want is you to shade me and be my leaves."

Kyoya had to smile as the song played on. It was charming.
Yuuki decided to lean against him and continue ruining the lyrics by talking over them. "If you were a river in the mountains tall, the rumble of your water would be my call. If you were the winter, I know I'd be the snow just as long as you were with me, when the cold winds blow."

Kyoya kissed the top of her head and pulled his paper out from where it lay crumpled in his lap.
"If you were a wink, I'd be a nod. If you were a seed, well I'd be a pod. If you were the floor, I'd wanna be the rug. And if you were a kiss, I know I'd be a hug." His wife looked up at him, merrily beaming. Obviously a little too tired for her own good. "If you were the wood, I'd be the fire. If you were the love, I'd be the desire. If you were a castle, I'd be your moat, and if you were an ocean, I'd learn to float."

The man turned the page of his paper. "You don't even like swimming."
"I like you."

"One would hope so." He smiled deviously.

Yuuki sat up again and ran a hand through her hair. "Speaking of lovers. I have to see Zero."

"Were we speaking of lovers?"
"Yes. I have thousands." She knew he hadn't been listening to her totally. Which was a shame. She'd just have to put the song on repeat then. "Upon thousands."

"Oh. Really? Are any of them any good?"
"To me? No. Not one."

"Not one?"
She shook her head. "Not one." Yuuki stood up and stretched before heading for the door. "Well...maybe one." She said, pausing at the door frame. "He sort of hates it when I play music instead of say words. Which means iTunes is a complete waste of time. But then again, most multi-million dollar businesses are."

"What's my business then?"
"Oh. The billion dollar businesses are fine."
Kyoya went to protest that they weren't billionaires, his company churned out that much, but most of it when back in. But that was beside the point Yuuki was trying to make. She smiled and disappeared into the hall as he contemplated the workings of her mind, knowing he would find no answer, knowing that would make him contented to keep trying; even when he knew he would never, ever know the full truth. Just as she wouldn't about his mysteries.

Yuuki caught Zero in the paddock and led him back to his stall. "Hello." The horse rammed her in the back. "No. Don't. I very recently drowned. I don't need to be broken." Zero hooked his head over her shoulder as she unlocked his stall and sniffed the front of her shirt. "I don't have anything for you. You'll get unwell again." Yuuki ran a hand down his face and then led him inside the cubicle. "I can give you dinner. Mmm. Oats. Yum." Pause. "Right?"
Whenever Kyoya got home, he needed a little while on his own. His wife would greet him and then let him unwind. Personal space was part of sharing a space and not smothering the flame. Yuuki loved spending time with her horse anyway. "You did good this morning, boy." She carried a bucket to the tap and filled it before returning with fresh water. "Tachi did good with you yesterday." Her instructor had taken to exercising her Zero every second day as his own horse had become his daughters and the other broke its leg at a competition and was forced to retire.

"Speak of the devil and he shall come." Tachi called from the stall gate. "How you doing home-skillet?"
"I was good until you called me home-skillet." Yuuki turned and brushed a hair off her face. "What brings you here?"

"Why the offensive tone?" He was wearing his cap. His worn old baseball cap. The sort men wore when they had to work outside for a living.
"Mako barged in the other day. How do people get into my house?"
"I...went in the side gate?" Tachi pointed to the paddock fence. "I told Mako about it, he probably went that way too."

"Oh. Okay." Mental note, lock gate. "You need something?"
"I need wire."
"Why?"
"Fence broke. I've got none. Can't be bothered to drive all the way to the store to get any."
"Lazy." Yuuki peered into the tack room. "I think Mako took it all to fence his yard." Note to self two; buy wire.

"Really? Darn."

"Need anything else?" Yuuki settled Zero for the night and locked his stall.

Tachi thought a moment. "Yeah, you got any of them...uh..." He made gestures with his hands. "...the stuff you use to clean the leather with..."
"Cloth?" The girl offered.

The man shrugged. "That will do."

Yuuki pulled a stack out of the tack room and handed them over. "Anything else?"
"Yeah. The leather cleaner."
Return trip. Hand over. Questioning look. Yuuki crossed her arms.

"No...I think that's it. Good doing business with you ma'am." Tachi tipped his hat. Pause. "You heard from your dad lately?"
The girl scratched the back of her neck. "Last I heard, he was admitted to a hospital in Osaka for Bipolar."

"Ha." The man thought a minute. "That makes sense."
"Yes. Sadly."
"You talked to him?"
"No."
"Do you want to?"
"Not really."
"Some part of you wants to." Tachi started walking back outside. Evening was falling quickly. The house lit up on the hill and warmed the grass. "That's what 'not really' means to me."
"He's...my dad. It's a watered down sort of guilt. Could have been loss. But it's not." She'd taught Kyoya that.

"All right, kid. I got your back if you need me."
"Okay. Thanks." Yuuki waved slightly as her instructor disappeared into the distance. To the corner of the paddock where his white jeep sat silently.

The girl headed back up to the house and found her husband in the kitchen, on the phone. His face was filled with a bleak long-suffering. "No, Tamaki. We're not coming. I know no one's perfe...No. We're not in denial. Of course we do. No. No. Tama..." Kyoya pinched the bridge of his nose. "Okay. Shut up a second and stop talking crap. Thank you. No, we are not coming. No we will not look after your children. Why? Because last time I saw your happy little son he made a happy little mess on Yuuki who created a happy little spiel of sick days."

Yuuki laughed quietly and said goodbye to the cook as she headed out. She'd put dinner in the oven to stay warm, it looked like the master wasn't going to have an appetite. The girl thanked her and said she'd take care of dinner the next night. The woman laughed and shut the door.

Kyoya was still on the phone. "Tamaki..." He sighed. "I have previous arrangements for Saturday." At this his wife laughed again. Saturday was their day. Or their morning. But it turned into a movie and books and conversations about life, the universe and everything. It was their escape. "Tamaki, we're not coming. Why would we come to something we have no interest in? I understa...I kno...Stop interrupting." He hung up.

"Yay. Awesome couples and awesome love and awesome stories and it's just awesome. Right?" Yuuki said, carrying dinner through to the dining room.

"Say awesome one more time..."
"Awesome."
Kyoya sighed.

"Sorry." Yuuki returned and pulled a jug of water out of the fridge. "Glasses, please."

Her husband carried them through and sat down to brood over Tamaki and his overtly bright and pushy manner. Brooding would equalise the sudden onslaught of perky phrases that had bombarded his mind in such a short space of time.

"You know." His wife said. "It's already dead."
Kyoya came out of his grumpy trance. "What?"
"Your food. It's dead. You look like you want to kill something."
"Someone."
"What did Tamaki do?"

"He called four times, in half an hour. Just to convince me to take us to the thing on the weekend."
"Uhuh. The awesome thing?"
Kyoya raised an eyebrow.

"Okay. Sorry. The amazing thing."

He smiled slightly. "Yes. That." Pause. "It's supposed to be a way to communicate to other couples."
"Isn't that what...um...friendship is?" She said through a yawn. And consequently, her hand.

Kyoya smiled again. "It's quite the possibility."
"Mm. Quite." Pause. "Maybe we should go."

"Why?"
"Well, it could be...fun. What time does it start?"
"Nine."
"AM?"
He nodded.
"Yeah. No. We're not going." Yuuki said flatly.

Kyoya laughed. "Tamaki can't understand why."
"Don't you tell him."
"Don't point your fork. No I won't tell him why."
"Good." Yuuki crossed her legs on her chair and pushed her plate away. "I gots to go to sleep."

"Got's to hey?"
"I watched Star Wars today. Grammar, unimportant it is." She imitated Yoda.

Kyoya pushed his glasses up and smiled. "Okay. You're very tired."
"Mmmmmmm." Yuuki dropped her head on the mahogany table. "I is. Long day. Lots of people." She sat up. "But I'm not actually very tired. Just...a little."

"You want to go on Saturday?"
"No."

"Okay." The phone rang. Kyoya knew it would have and hence asked his question seconds before. He answered. "No. Tamaki. Go away." Click. It rang again a second later. "I will sue you." Click. Again. "I'm serious." He said fatally. The phone didn't ring again.

Yuuki clapped happily after five minutes passed in silence. "He's gone."

"Victory." Kyoya stood and wandered out of the room. His wife knew exactly where he was headed and planned to get there first. By the time he reached the shower, Yuuki was already there. Not entirely happy. "If I wanted to argue for the shower, I would move back home."
"Then stop arguing." Her voice was muffled from behind the frosted glass.

He did and shared part of his world with her.

-

And as he spoke, he spoke ordinary words
Although they did not feel
For I felt what I had not felt before
And you'd swear those words could heal.
And as I looked up into those eyes
His vision borrows mine.
And I know he's no stranger,
For I feel I've held him for all of time.

And he said take my hand,
Live while you can
Don't you see your dreams lie right in the palm of your hand
In the palm of your hand.

Please come with me,
See what I see.
Touch the stars for time will not flee.
Time will not flee.
Can you see?

Just a dream, just an ordinary dream.
As I wake in bed
And the boy, that ordinary boy
Or was it all in my head?
Did he asked if I would come along
It all seemed so real.
But as I looked to the door,
I saw that boy standing there with a deal.

Just a day, just an ordinary day
Just trying to get by.
Just a boy,
Just an ordinary boy.
But he was looking to the sky.

(Ordinary Day, Vanessa Carlton)

-

Another month passed and another negative test resulted from its passing. Yuuki threw it in the bin and went riding to clear her head. When she came back, she and Kyoya had a fight about it.

"Why do you keep doing this?" He stood in the bathroom and she leant on the door frame and tried to maintain a dignified stubborn expression. "You keep expecting and..."
"It's not going to happen. I know." She shot back, talking over him.

"I never said that." His tone was like ice.
"But you know it. I know it. It's just not going to happen."

"It hasn't happened. It's not, not going to."

"Prove that to me, Kyoya. You say you want a kid and I know you do. Is that worse than me wanting one? I mean...I'm the one who finds out first."
"There is nothing wrong with wanting it. But geez Yuuki. It's hard as it is without you running to the pharmacy every month."
"Nothing happens every month. You don't know what that's like to not know about something you expect."
He exhaled acerbically. "Surely you don't expect it."
"Well then, surely you don't expect a baby." She said flatly and turned away from him, storming out of the room and then out the front door.

Kyoya found her on the front steps. "Don't walk away from me."
"Don't try to control me."
"Who will when you can't control yourself?"
"Oh. And you're high and mighty. It's a free country. Sort of. If I walk away, I walk away."
"You might as well run away from the situation then."
"You might as well shut up." She put her chin in her hands and stared straight ahead.

Kyoya sighed. "Look, you know I want what's best for you."
"And you." She scoffed.
"Yes." He sat down beside her. "And it's really not best that you keep hiding."
"I wasn't hiding."
"Yuuki, you left halfway through an argument."
"Does that mean we're almost done?"
Kyoya pushed his glasses up. "Not until you argue back."
"No."
"There you go."
She stared at him. "Kyoya, I can't control myself. Like...I can, I just can't control the part that we're fighting about. I don't know what happens in there."
"I know." He said, his voice still cold. "I'm not fighting at you. This isn't about you. This is about what you're doing to yourself. It's not healthy."
"What is?"
"Expecting."
"I do. For a long time now. I haven't used any medication or anything since the miscarriage. Something should have happened. Other women would have had a million kids by now."
"A whole million?"
"A whole million." She threw a piece of gravel that had found its way onto the stairs back onto the drive. "This isn't about me. Well, it is, sort of. But I want to please you too."
"You can't please me by trying to force yourself into pathogenesis."
"Well, being asexual would suck for you so..."

Kyoya's tone melted slightly. "You're not going to relax. Are you?"
"No."
"You never did, did you?"
"No." Pause. "I tried though."
"Okay. Well. If we're going to be honest about this; you're very probably never going to have children."

Yuuki stared at the front gate. "Yes. I know. I always knew."
"But we can still try."
"And tell people we're practicing?"
"Well. I'm sure they expect something is occurring by now."
"It's not though." The girl looked down at her stomach. It was flat and young. Youth was hope. "I want it to."
"Me too. But," Kyoya put a hand in between her shoulder blades. "If it does, it's going to be something even I can't explain."
"You can't explain us, and that's what the baby will be. Inexplicable. Us."
"Will be?"
Yuuki paused. "I'm trying to be optimistic. Things happen."

"Okay." The man stood and put his hands in his pockets. "Well, we both need to go be optimistic at work." Life kept moving forward. Forward motion of everything is something that is inevitable; you just have to keep up. And they were stagnant at one topic. One point.

"Yay." Yuuki said in a deflated manner as she stood. "It's not like you have to work. Could just retire now."
"But then we'd have to share a helicopter with the neighbours." Kyoya was still Kyoya. He liked money. Probably more than he should. But it was no longer an obsession. He pulled the front door open for his wife. "And you'd have to attempt to cook more often."
"I can cook." Yuuki stepped inside.
"Yes, brownies."
"Which you will never appreciate."

The door shut with a click. "You can make sushi."
"Everyone can make sushi. It's not very hard."

"I can't make sushi."
"You've never tried." Pause. "Stop trying to make me feel better." She said lightly.

Kyoya smiled ever so slightly and pushed his glasses up. "Is it working?"
There was a long silence. "I'm sorry."

"I am too."

Yuuki turned around and hugged him quite suddenly. Kyoya returned the favour and they stood in the foyer for a very long time. That was it. Just them. Only them. They had said they were each other's forever, and meant it. Him and her. Her and him. That was it. It was something they could never lose sight of, ever. They wouldn't let it happen.

Yuuki blinked slowly and breathed. "This is all I have to give you."

Kyoya lifted a hand to the back of her head, as if to take her worries away. "It's more than I ever asked for."
"But it's no..."
"Yuuki. Don't."

"But I want to give you so much more. And I can't."
"It's mutual."
"It is not."

"You don't think that I would give you everything if I could?"

"But you have."
"Why can't you see it the same way?"
"Because you can't either."

Kyoya contemplated her statement for a moment. "What do you want?"
"You."
"That's all?"
"That's all."

"You have it."

"Don't you want more than just me?"
"No."
"Don't you want a baby?"
"If I lose you in the process, no. Why do you think we've avoided assisted technologies? It's not something we need science for." It wasn't biology. Not to them. To others, yes. Science helped them, it was the miracle to a miracle. But to them, it was something that took away from what a child would be to them. A product of them. Not of someone helping them. Their struggle.

Yuuki paused. "Are we selfish then? To want it as an extension of us, and not as itself?"
"But that's what it would have been. She would have been an entire being, but you and I at the same time." They had three lives; his, hers and theirs. But they dwelled so well in each other's company that it was like one life. They overlapped in such a way that they became a continual sphere where you knew it was made up of designed segments, but their edges had been lost and become a blur of some amazing colour.

"Love is the expression of one's values, the greatest reward you can earn for the moral qualities you have achieved in your character and person, the emotional price paid by one man for the joy he receives from the virtues of another."

"Atlas Shrugged."

"Ayn Rand." Yuuki smiled. He was the only person who would know the book. One of few who had actually read it; it was one of the many she'd returned with at a yard sale. There was something enchanting about old books.

Kyoya let her go and held his wife by the shoulders, staring at her as if she were the last thing on earth and the only thing needed to keep all of mankind alive. "There needs to be nothing else." He was an egoist. For him to hang everything and settle for something with a heartbeat was a feat worthy of the title miracle. He'd done the trial and error and left her for those without a pulse and found nothing to satisfy him as a human. And we all are human, after all.

-

She had come back into his life like a sudden flame, blazing and streaming into his heart. Noah stayed up all night contemplating the certain agony he knew would be his if he were to lose her twice.
(Duke, The Notebook)

-

Yuuki traced the line of his jaw. "This is it."
"This is all."

"And it's more than I ever asked for." She smiled in a melancholy manner. She accepted what had happened and the results that came from it. And it was okay. They could still have a child, maybe, possibly, probably not. But it was not a definitely no answer. It was a probably no. Which means there was a maybe yes somewhere, floating around. Deep down, she knew she wouldn't catch it if she tried. If she didn't, it might come to her. But then again, probably not. "Alright." Yuuki nodded once. "The world keeps spinning." Only superman could turn it the other way and bring time back. But no supermen existed.

"And I'm still the richest man alive." Kyoya said smugly. It was probably true too. One of the richest young people according to an interview in Business Annual anyway.

"And yet, so modest." His wife pinched him and casually headed for the kitchen for breakfast. When he came in after her she was arguing with a bottle of orange juice. "Woah. There isn't enough room in here for me and your ego."

"Open a window." He took the bottle, opened it and put it on the counter.

Yuuki sat on one of the stools and poured herself a glass, shaking her head as she mused behind the rim of her cup and laughing silently to herself. Amazing. Absolutely amazing. And fulfilled.

-

I can only give you love that lasts forever,
And a promise to be near each time you call.
And the only heart I own
For you and you alone
That's all, that's all...

I can only give you country walks in springtime
And a hand to hold when leaves begin to fall;
And a love whose burning light
Will warm the winter's night
That's all, that's all.

There are those I am sure who have told you,
They would give you the world for a toy.
All I have are these arms to enfold you,
And a love time can never destroy.

If you're wondering what I'm asking in return, dear,
You'll be glad to know that my demands are small.
Say it's me that you'll adore,
For now and evermore
That's all, that's all.

(That's all, Michael Buble)

-

The host club sat around Suki's gigantic dining room table and debated the plot line of a movie.
"No. But he died!" Hunny clutched his fork and looked a little forlorn.

"He was supposed to." Tamaki shot back. "It was all part of his plan!" Pause. "Right Kyoya? You know about planning."
The Ootori pushed his glasses up. "It's a movie."
"So?"
"It's a movie."
"So?"
"It's a movie. End of story."
The twins put their heads together, as if that would help them think. "Well, it defiantly made some girls cry." They eyed Haruhi.

She threw a cherry tomato at them. "Shut up."
"Well," They continued in unison. "Yuuki and Suki didn't cry."
The older woman decided to point out why. "It's because I told Ootori-kid over here that Will Smith looked like a Greek god, chiselled from fine, dark marble."

Yuuki nodded. "It's true. My whole perception of the film went out the window at the most crucial moment." Pause. She looked at her friend. "Ootori-kid?"
Suki shrugged. "It was the first thing that popped into my head."
"Yes. I could tell."

Mori leant back in his chair. Everyone looked at him, expecting him to say something. He didn't. It was very anticlimactic. Tamaki sighed. "Well, it was a good movie."

There were nods of agreement, shakes from Hunny. "NO! It was terrible! I didn't leave happy at all!"

"It wasn't a pursuit of happiness." Mori pointed out. "Pun not intended."
"But, Takashi, it made Haru-chan cry."
"Yes. What a pity." The twins said mischievously.

Kyoya watched them from behind a vague expression of contemplation. He pushed his glasses up. "It wouldn't be a pity if you suffered too." He didn't say had suffered. Silent threat to make them back off.

The chestnuts stared at the Ootori and promptly stopped harassing the female Suoh. "So, how was that article in Vanity Fair?"
Yuuki sighed. Suki clapped. "Quote. 'It's not like we spend unnecessarily. But when we do, it's never anything that will be considered inadequate.' Unquote." She leant forward. "Pray, do tell us what that means dear Yuuki? Especially in context with economic recession."

The girl tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Why are you memorising everything I say?"
"I'm not. I just do it for the stuff I want to pick at."
"You're such a loving person."
"I know."
Yuuki sighed. "I'm not about to discuss my spending habits."
Kyoya smiled slightly. The twins picked up on it. "So you're...supporting the economy?"
"Not like you are." The girl shot back. "Like I said, I don't spend unnecessarily."

"But it's never inadequate."
"No."
"Example?"
"OH!" Hunny sat up straight. "I know an example." The Ootori pair stared at the little blonde. Waiting to see if he had worked out a small part of them. "That Dali painting you used to replace the Monet that Hika-chan and Kao-chan destroyed."
"They destroyed it?" Kyoya said menacingly. "I thought they were just getting it repaired."
"No. It's destroyed." Hunny beamed innocently.

"Ah. Well. They will be paying for the Dali then."
The twin's faces fell. "What?"
Kyoya went on as if it were the most natural thing to charge a private sale for a painting by the one and only Salvador Dali, and for it to be Woman at the Window to top it off. It had been a very, very, very private sale. "Well, you know the old term, you break it, you buy it. You broke a Monet. You will buy a Dali to compensate." Pause. "Or...I could give my friends at the Louvre a call and they would happily charge you the full amount as opposed to the 'mates-rates' price we paid."

Hikaru and Kaoru decided to never, ever, ever again try to cross Kyoya. As did everyone else at the table. Ever. Never ever. Yuuki was trying not to laugh. The Salvador Dali painting was real, such is the life of the rich more so than the famous, but they'd got it from the insurance money for the Monet which they knew was destroyed.

The girl smiled impishly. "Art is like fine wine. You only get the real thing for a very big price."

"Yes. Apparently." Came the Hitachiin's deflated reply. "How rich are you anyway?"
Yuuki raised her eyebrows in as a dismissive quirk. They were not the type to display their wealth and at a glance, no one would guess what it really was. Their house was furnished well, kept well and contained many affluent secrets.

Kyoya sat smugly beside her. "Did you know that Germany has just bought the rights to build an Ootori group hospital there too? Dubai is considering it very heavily too." That answered their question. Everyone knew that the Ootori group got much of the profit accumulated by anything regarding the medical world and made a few nifty bob on the side through resorts, health spas, treatment centres and very recently, youth houses. It was a vast empire that the world would always need or appreciate. Either way. It was full of merit of the most prosperous kind.

"Then why don't we ever go to your house for dinner." Suki exclaimed.

"Because you'd never leave." Came the plain reply.

"You have more money than God." Haruhi said, unimpressed.

Tamaki blinked; he was impressed. "Hold on...wait...Jehosephat Kyoya."

"What?" His friend glanced at the blonde casually.

"CAN WE BE BFF?!" Came the explosion. He ignored the fact that they were close friends anyway.

"Well..." Yuuki said, watching as Tamaki tried to hug her husband, get him to put him in his will and then smother him after it was signed. "...I guess we all know why you're friends with us."
"Oh. At least we donate money to charities." Haruhi said lightly. "Instead of going to benefits that cost more than the actual amount achieved."

"Hey, I bought a coffee table at one of those benefit's." Yuuki mused.

"And a small country in Africa." Suki shot back sarcastically.

The girl decided to play with that statement sarcastically. "Well, it's not as expensive as you would think."
"Ooooh really?"

"Anyway." She pushed her plate away. "Enough talk of money. Politics is much more interesting."

And thus, the argument about whether China had been unified through the proclamation of the People's Republic of China by Mao or whether it was still not unified and had only attained a new set of leaders.
Pretty soon thereafter, the movie put on for the kids ended and they all came scurrying into the adjacent dining room. Or, the two girls scurried. Kenji crawled. Their nanny followed the beaming children and got the Suoh's attention with the offer of a Barbie movie. Kenji didn't actually care, he didn't actually know either, he was happy though that his mother and father came to settle them again. Jasmine had seen Yuuki and scampered under the table to hug her leg and decide not to let go.

The little girl giggled joyously and started to climb into the girl's lap. Yuuki picked her up and helped her there before she could ruin her skirt

"Surprise."

Jasmine clapped and laughed. "Supise!"

"No, darling. More than one syllable."

"Syllahbal."

"No. Syllable."
"Supise!"

"Okay." Yuuki decided not to relive her fights with Riki.

The now student was standing at the door beside the nanny, watching the adults with wide eyes. "Is Kyoya still evil?" She called out for anyone to answer.

"Yes. Very." The twins said in unison.

Riki seemed a little forlorn, but then she thought of something and her face lit up. "I like bad-boys."
Yuuki almost choked. "How old are you?"
"I'll be older than you when I grow up."
"Really?"
"Yes. I will."
"Sure?"

"Yes."
"Can you do math?"
"Yes."
"What is the theory of relativity?"
"Your face."

"Close." Pause."Hey! That's my comeback."
"It's mine now."
"You're a brat."
"You married my man."
"You're the second person to say that."
Kyoya sat and listened in an amused manner.

His wife glanced at him. "Okay. Well. Now that his ego is nice and inflated, he can go destroy the world."
It seemed that Riki believed her. "Really?"
"Really, really."

The girl decided it was high time to go watch her movie and escape the evil clutches of the demon lord. She turned around to Yuuki as she left. "Well, I've been to Switzerland."
"Well...I've been to...Australia."
"Where's that?" Came the stoic reply before the girl disappeared.

Jasmine had been watching Yuuki's face as she argued. When the girl turned back to her, she smiled broadly and threw her arms around the woman's neck. "Yuu!"

Yuuki rubbed her back for a second and then peeled her away. "Want to go watch Barbie?"

"Yes!" The little girl reattached.

"Okay." She stood up and then realised Jasmine wasn't going to let go. Yuuki carried the girl through to the lounge and then pried her arms away and sat her down. It took about a minute for her to catch onto the screen.

Kyoya watched these events thoughtfully. She would have made a great mother. If she was given a second chance, she would make a great mother.

"What you thinking about?" Suki picked up a few plates. "No one except wifey can tell."
The man looked up and slid his glasses a little higher. "Just...pondering."
"Parenting?"
"Pondering."
"No. I heard you. Pondering parenting?"
"No." He lied.

Suki sighed. "You two will come around one day."

"Maybe."
"It's quite the possibility."
"No. Not really."

The woman paused and met Kyoya's eye. She didn't know anything, but she thought she understood. The topic was dropped immediately. Yuuki looked at her husband over her shoulder. She was knelt down in front of the couch, trying to get Jasmine to latch firmly onto the TV so she could return. She smiled. Jasmine saw where she was looking and instantly jumped off the couch and rushed off to catch Kyoya.

"Got Yoo!" She cried happily, hugging his knee.

Yuuki sighed and sat down, laughing quietly. Kyoya smiled silently at the baby and picked her up and carried her back to the sofa. There he said, very officially, that she was to sit and enjoy the movie. It worked. Somehow.

His wife accepted his help up and they both watched the scene. Tamaki had Aimi on his lap and was explaining the finer points that all men should aspire to. Haruhi was settling Kenji to sleep. Jasmine saw her father sitting on the opposite end of the couch, holding a conversation with the twins, and she decided that if she was going to sit and enjoy the movie; she might as well do it on daddy's lap.

It was a world they had admission to, but didn't belong in. Hikaru and Kaoru were perfectly at ease, children still themselves. Hunny was Peterpan-toddler style, Mori was his big brother. Yuuki and Kyoya, they didn't fit in those categories or in any nearby.

But it was okay. No one fit anywhere near their own. Or fit it quite so perfectly. They stood in the doorway, like figures from a painting. Her with her arm around his torso and him with his around her shoulders. She was slightly turned into him, in a devoted way that let him breathe. If she deemed it the right time, she could easily breathe his air too. But it was not right. They were thinking. Standing. Being. Like guardians. Shadows. Always there, never understood. Always accepted, never fitting in. They had each other. And that's where it fit.

If someone had looked in through the giant bay window that displayed the room, they would have seen two families with children. Happy families. The rare kind. They would have seen tight bonds, friendships. Perfect siblings and perfect relations. Like a movie scene. Then they would have seen the pair standing in the door to the room. The pair who were exceptionally happy where they stood. Just as. But they would also have been happy inside the room. They were the smiles in a sea of laugher. The thought in a room of students. The water in the rain. The things that are and never were any other way and never would be anything else. And yet, inexplicable. Their world shimmered on the edge of their friends'. Just there. Just visible. But out of reach.

If someone had kept watching, they would have seen them take their leave and slip into the night. They would have seen them get home and have her convince him to lie on the grass at the front of the house with her and confuse stars for satellites. They would have seen them kiss on the porch after sharing a few words, laced with melancholy; like the closing of a previous conversation. And then they would have been forced, unconsciously, to look away. As if it were a holy site. But it was not. It was just was and always had been.

-

I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph, I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

(Broken, Seether)

-

--------

Inspired by the piano piece Kiss the Rain by Yiruma.

Please let me know what you thought. Your input is very important to me. Constructive criticism is also welcome. I appreciate every review you leave, they help this story continue.

A big thanks to my reviewers for your support. You are all amazing. Thank you.

Blessings,

-pp