Chapter 19 - He Wasn't You

Castle tangled his fingers in the ringlets of her hair, he dragged her onto his lap, gently planting a kiss on sweet spot at the base of the back of her neck. He didn't let her go.

Kate swatted his thigh, whispering "Rick, not here." While her eyes said 'later.'

Castle picked up his head to meet her gaze, his body relaxed as his arms encircled her.

He requested two fresh beers. "You have some explaining to do about this place."

Kate hesitated for a moment "Thought you were a detective, Ricky." She teased. "Didn't you figure it out?"

Castle responded with a chuckle "Oh, I figured some of it out." He flashed a devilish grin "I'm happy to wait." The smile he received in return took his breath away. He desperately wanted to swoop down and captured her mouth. He didn't give a damn how many overly buff guys with high and tight haircuts watched. He knew she needed it, she wanted it – the reassurance that words alone wouldn't bring. She saw the desire in his eyes.

The beers were dropped on the bar. Ben once again cocked his eyebrow and chuckled "Mystery solved?"

"Almost" Castle wanted to snuggle closer to Kate, he knew she wouldn't approve. He made the decision to lean in, let his breath play on her cheek as he uttered, "Proud of you." He was proud that she publically acknowledged her PTSD, equally proud that she chose to share the moment with him.

Kate blushed as she averted her eyes "It was tough." She was sure he knew it was that much tougher having him there. Letting him see her vulnerable, emotionally exposed.

He remained silent, she had more to say. His hand meandered up her back, making tiny circles around each vertebra; silently urging her to continue.

"I selected the song before I knew you were coming." Her eyes apologized – as if it might have been too much. Blue eyes twinkled back at her. He smiled knowingly, still saying nothing.

"Over the summer I sang that song over and over and over in my head. It was an anthem of sorts."

"That helps."

Green eyes grew larger than life meeting his and asking "It does?" She quickly refocused her eyes on the beers in front of them.

Castle tried to catch her eye. He wiped sweat from his brow. "Until you showed up before Ryan's wedding, I still wondered if you broke up with Josh because of him or me. And now sharing this moment with me, I have my answer."

Kate's eyes darted around the bar; she felt she owed him the answer. Her hand wrapped around her beer, downing it in one gulp. "Both. It's simple, he wasn't you."