Chapter 23 - Morning After

Kate felt the bed, for him. Rick's spot was still warm. She pulled on her jeans from the night before, still dressed in his oversized t-shirt, she headed towards the kitchen. Better to face Martha and Alexis now while she had the courage than to stall, allowing doubt to creep in to her mind. Kate had never dated a man with a kid OR a man who lived with his Mother. Even though she understood the circumstances, found it endearing that Rick let his Mother live with him when he could easily buy her, her own place - chatting with Martha over morning coffee was going to take some getting used to.

The smell of coffee wafted through the study and into the bedroom. A sign that now was definitely the time to face the family. She stopped for a moment to gaze around Castle's study, admiring the fabulous city view. Wealth did have positive perks.

The open shelves of books began to beckon to her. Kate stifled a giggle at the collection of remote control helicopters and police cars. He really was a five year old at heart. Rick had such a fabulous collection of books; Tennessee Williams, Fitzgerald, Kerouac, Steinbeck, Poe, Shakespeare, Chaucer, Twain, Irving as well as the predictable Lehane, Connelly, Cannell, and Patterson.

Her reading was interrupted by the sound of hushed voices. Isn't it funny how one can ignore normal tones, even yelling? Yet the moment voices shift to a lower register humans develop bat ears.

Castle's voice was strained as he hissed, "Mother DO NOT tell me what to do. I have this handled."

"Kiddo I'm not telling you what to do. Ask yourself if you have REALLY thought this through. At some time you are going to have to tell that lovely lady of yours what you have been doing. The sooner the better, you know these things, secrets in general have a way of getting out at the worst possible time."

Guilt washed over Kate for having listened in on their private conversation. It obviously was about her and not intended for her ears. She tried to stop herself but she couldn't. As she swung open the door from the study to the living room she blurted out "Tell me what?"

Rick turned at the sound of her voice and instinctively recoiled when he saw the look on her face. Kate had that signature look of mistrust that she wore when interrogating a suspect and her gut said they were lying. The color from his own face drained away, to be replaced by an ashy hue. He tried to salvage things "Nothing that can't wait. Hungry?"

Kate looked from Rick to Martha and back to Rick. "I have the distinct impression sooner is better." Her stomach started to summersault as Martha gave a caring smile "Good to see you Kate, I think I will leave you two alone. Love you kiddo."

Flashing a somewhat forced friendly smile, Kate responded "You too Martha." Martha's immediate desire to depart worried Kate.

Rick jammed his hands in the pockets of his robe. A look of despair took his face hostage. He knew if he didn't tell her now, waited to tell her later it would only be worse. He tried to prolong the inevitable a little longer by handing Kate a cup of coffee; his heart skipped a beat as their fingers brushed each other. Would this be the last touch?

Kate closed the remaining space between them encircling her arms around his waist. "Rick, are you stalling?" There was a kindness in her eyes that he knew would soon disappear.

Rick bent his head and buried it in her hair that was falling loosely on her shoulder. He kissed her shoulder, he whispered into her ear "Everything I did or didn't do, I did for you."

She pressed her check to his, returning his whisper "You're worrying me Rick. Did what?"

Rick slid his hands to cup her face, pleading with his eyes 'Please let's eat first.' "Pancakes? Waffles? French toast? Eggs? Bacon?"

Kate met his gaze head on "Please tell me what you did."

He tried to lighten the mood. "As you wish." His attempt at levity wasn't lost her – she gave him a sad but sincere smile in return. Rick placed a hand on the small of her back, guiding her to his study. He didn't need his mother or Alexis walking in what was about to happen next.

Kate turned to look over her shoulder at Rick the summersaults in her stomach were consumed by dread.