Chapter 40
---
If to distant lands I scatter, If I sail to farthest seas
Would you find and firm and gather 'til I only dwell in Thee?
If I flee from greenest pastures, would you leave to look for me?
Forfeit glory to come after, 'Til I only dwell in Thee
If my heart has one ambition, if my soul one goal to seek
This my solitary vision 'til I only dwell in Thee
That I only dwell in Thee
'Til I only dwell in Thee
(Hymn, Brooke Fraser)
---
It's funny how the days turn to weeks. And the weeks into months. The months into years. It's funny how it all feels like yesterday. Like one, long stretched out moment. One perfect moment. A flawed, tangible, perfection. It's funny how life never stops. It never stops when you want to stay in a moment. But it keeps moving, and lets you look back on that moment. And touch it. And breath it. And hear it thudding through your mind.
Yuuki and Kyoya spent every spare moment together. Just after they'd dropped their son at school. Just after he's dropped off to sleep. Just before he woke up. But they never left him. Ever. Kain was so much a part of them it was as if he was in every single moment of their lives. When he was with them, it was as if they were unified completely. Two whole entities that became one. One that loved, adored and cherished; a miracle that could smile and run and fall over. A gift that had no end.
"Good night baby." Yuuki leant over Kain as he lay in bed.
"Ma?" The boy took his mother's hand from where it rested beside him.
"Yes?"
"Can I stay up late tomorrow?" Their voices were low. Hushed. Sweet like summer.
"What day is tomorrow?"
"It's Friday." He knew that she knew. But he was glad she had asked. Given him the chance to make a point.
"Do you want to have your riding lesson in the afternoon before we go to the Suoh's?"
Slight, sleepy nodding.
"Okay baby, we'll see."
Kain let her fingers go free from his grip. "Can you send dad in to say goodnight?"
"Sure, Kain. You go to sleep though."
"Okay."
"Okay." She kissed his forehead. "Sleep sweet dear."
"You to ma."
Yuuki smiled and went to the door. She paused and glanced back. Kain was waiting. He wouldn't go to sleep until she got Kyoya. The boy's father was his hero. Superman and Batman in the same breath. A superhero without superpowers. Just a man. An extraordinary man.
The girl slipped into the house and through to the study. "Kyoya?"
"Mm?" He paused his typing and glanced up. The light of the lap glinted off his glasses.
"Kain is waiting for you to say goodnight."
"Okay." The man paused. Stared at the screen. Stood and pushed his glasses up. Work or play? Work or play? Inevitably, it came down to what he would work the hardest for.
Yuuki hugged him softly. "You tired?"
"Mm."
His wife kissed the underside of his jaw. "Thank you."
"For what?"
"For making time." His job meant a lot to him. But his family meant more.
"It's a pleasure." The man smiled down tenderly.
Yuuki pressed her lips to the corner of his and unwrapped herself so that he could settle Kain for the night. Kyoya had a lot of work to do. It was the end of the financial year. And thus, the end of another successful stint for the Ootori group. One that had to be recorded. Checked. Tax deductable and full of profit. It also had to be improved for next season. Things were crazy. Hectic. Stressful. But there were moments. Delicate moments. Where they weren't. Where an adoring frame would tie to another. When a son wanted to say goodnight. Moments where the world ceased to exist as it did to the universe, and existed entirely as they saw it. It was still the world, with all its blemishes and bitterness, but it was a perfect world. Where they existed. Together.
Kyoya went to his son and found him sitting up groggily, waiting for him.
"Dad?" Kain rubbed his eye with the back of his hand.
"Hello."His tone was quiet. Warm. "I hear you need to go to sleep?"
Sleepy nodding. "Yeah. But I wanted to say goodnight." He held his arms out.
His father hugged him back steadily. "Goodnight Kain."
"Goodnight dad."
Kyoya brushed the hair back away from his son's face. "Kain?"
"Mm."
"I need you to think about something."
"Okay."
"You have a long time yet. But I need you to think about whether you want to be the heir to the Ootori group, okay?" He'd always wanted it, but he knew why others wouldn't.
"How long?"
"A long time." He kissed his son on the forehead. He had until his father passed on. "You let me know though? Okay? You watch and learn and try your best, and if, at the end, you want it. Tell me." He could give his son anything. He could provide him with choice. The man was tired, stressed and worn and to place that knowingly on another, especially one you loved, would be unbearable. Not unless they had chosen it for the benefits that outweighed the cons and made his job worthwhile.
"Okay." Kain said, his voice drawn. He didn't know that his father was doing something difficult. Giving him the option to move from something he had worked so hard to achieve.
"Love you Pa." The boy lay back down and pulled his covers up. He smiled jadedly from his pillow.
"Love you Kain." His father tucked him into bed and headed for the door. Before he closed it, he looked back on the sleeping form. Kain was smiling ever so slightly. Just like Yuuki did when she was asleep.
The girl was sitting in his chair when Kyoya re-entered the study. She was one of few that could manage a perfect crossed legged position in a swivel chair. Yuuki was staring at the screen.
"What are you doing?" Her husband came and stood behind her and leant heavily on the back of the seat.
"I'm reading."
"What?"
"Whatever you left on the screen." She scrolled down. "What is this?"
"It's the current developments, past developments and future developments. Measured on a scale to see progression."
"Oh." His wife bent her head back and looked up at him quizzically. "Righto."
Kyoya smiled smugly down at her. "It's good."
"No, I can see that." She returned playfully. "It's all good." Yuuki hit the save button and closed the window.
"I need to work on that."
"Not now." She swivelled the chair from his grip and turned to face him. "You've been doing this all day, and all yesterday. And now you have tired eyes." The girl lifted a gentle finger to his face and traced the skin just below the bottom rim of his glasses, her expression caring.
Kyoya put his hands on the chair arms and leant very close to her. A large majority of the world would have gone into cardiac arrest at such an encounter after telling an Ootori 'no.' Yuuki just grinned and closed her eyes irreverently as her husband kissed her forehead.
"You know," He said, hovering centimetres from her. "Between you and Kain, I'm going to get nothing done this evening."
"No." His wife shook her head. "Not work wise." There had been getting home, problems with homework, dinner, dessert, coffee and then an hour before Kain went to bed. Evenings were for them, not for work.
"Hm."
"Hm." Yuuki replied. Pause. "Is your webcam on?"
Kyoya laughed and kissed her. A minute later, the computer was off as a precaution. There is something about joy that wipes away weariness; both of the soul and mind. Something about it that makes a person young again. Which is why Yuuki and Kyoya never aged. They never would age. As long as they had each other.
Late that night though, deep under the covers, Yuuki stirred.
"Kyoya?" She said softly.
Her husband was idly playing with the hair that spilled onto her shoulder. A white, bare, pure shoulder. "Mm?"
"I know that it's a long way away, but...what do we do when one of us is left behind?"
"What do you mean, 'left behind'?" His tone was steady.
"I mean, what if you become a widower?" She wouldn't be a widow. Not for long. "What would you do without us?"
"Yuuki, I'll never be a widower."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
He ran his nose down hers. "You'll never be a widow."
"I don't follow you." Yuuki rested her fingers against his collarbone.
"You never have followed me." Her husband laughed mutedly. "You never will, nor I you." He turned his head sideways, his chin pressed against her forehead. "We said eternity, right?"
"Yes."
"So, we'll do that together."
"What about Kain?"
Kyoya moved his fingers down her arm and back up again to her shoulder. "Kain is like me."
Yuuki closed her eyes and rested with the idea. "Kain is like you in that, he was never dependant on his parents?"
"He is his parents Yuuki, with or without us. He will always have us, not just genetically." Kain would always have them in his mind, in his mannerisms, in his heart. Just like they did for him. Their little miracle. His two blessings.
"It just seems hard...to leave him behind."
"This is a long time away, Yuuki. We will leave him behind, but we'll take him with us too." They couldn't be apart. Not ever. They would take the piece of him that they always felt. That a parent always felt. And they would keep it so that he could find them. No man would ever have a surer sense of who he was and of where he could find himself.
Yuuki pressed herself against Kyoya. Aligned herself with him. Love is stronger than any ailment of man; even though it can't stop ailments from happening. No matter hard death tries to separate people from love, it cannot. It cannot take away memories. In the end, life is stronger than death. And it lasts longer. Every life tastes death. But no life has to live it. It just has to pause for it. The only time life pauses, is when it officially ends in one place. And that is what love is for. For making an everlasting covenant that would stretch into the farthest reaches of time. And stay there. Proper love. Not fairytale love. Not the sort of Cinderella. There was no 'happily ever after', just ever after.
Just them. Only they could make it happen. Only they could make sure it happened. Only they knew how. And why.
Only they knew them.
-
There's so much craziness, surrounding me
There's so much going on, it gets hard to breathe
When all my faith has gone, you bring it back to me
You make it real for me, and I'm running to you baby
You are the only one who saved me, that's why I've been missing you lately
Cause you make it real for me
You make it real for me
(You make it real for me, James Morrison)
-
It had been a cold, gusty, November afternoon when Kain asked the question.
The question.
The it question.
He was seven and had spent the day with Kenji, who was nine. Aimi had had health science that day. And the three talked. Or, the siblings talked. Kain got confused.
He was sitting on the floor, watching TV innocently when he suddenly broke the bombshell all parents expect but that no parent expects to answer.
Kain simply turned around and said it. "What is sex?"
Yuuki chocked on her tea. Unlike many children, he did not ask 'where do babies come from?', but rather went straight for the jugular of the topic. Straight to the root of a child's confusion as to his parents and not by the sideway of the creation of life.
Kyoya folded his newspaper. "Who taught you that?"
His son twisted to face his parents. "Aimi said the sex ED people came over. I know ED means education, but I don't know what se..."
"Ah." His mother put her cup down. "You don't need to know."
"Yuuki." Her husband chided, slightly amused.
"No." She looked at him. "I'm not telling him."
"I'll tell him."
"No. He's too young. When I said 'I'm not telling him', I meant we're not telling him." She waved her finger to indicate them both.
"He's seven."
"How old were you?"
"How old were you?" Kyoya quipped back.
Thoughtful pause. Awkward memory. Shudder. "Six."
"Then he's fine."
Kain stared at his parents. "Is it bad?"
Yuuki turned to her son. Her husband laughed quietly to himself as she searched for words. He wasn't going to help. Even though he was the male head of the household.
"Um. Kain." His mother clasped her hands in front of her. "Baby. Uh." Long pause. The girl bit her lip and thought a moment before reaching a conclusion. "You should google it."
At this her husband did laugh out loud.
Yuuki quickly backtracked "No! Wait! Don't google it." She waved a cautionary finger at her son. "Ever." The consequences could be horrifying.
"Um...okay." The boy frowned. "So... what is it?" Kain watched them expectantly.
Kyoya told Yuuki, once again, that he could handle it and watched as she curled into a tight ball on her side of the couch. An uncomfortable, bashful, scarlet ball.
Afterwards, Kain still sat on the floor. Except this time it was as if he'd grown slightly. He looked at the couple. "So...I come from..."
Yuuki sat up and almost laughed at her son's dismayed face. "Yeah."
"Yes." Kyoya pushed his glasses up.
"Whatever." She waved him away and gave her full attention to her son. "Kain, dear. Does that make sense?"
"No." The boy shook his head stoutly. "That's awful!"
The girl frowned. "Why?"
"Because..." He shuddered. "Yuck! Mom!"
"What?" Yuuki leant back and stared at her son. She was ever so slightly amused.
Kain's eyes were huge. His expression shocked. "Did you really want me THAT much?"
Kyoya laughed and pulled his wife into his side. "Yes we did Kain, yes we did."
And that was how each child became introduced into the true world of adults. How they begin the process of growing up. And it was awkward. Misunderstood. Somewhat gauche. But in the real world, real world knowledge was needed. And sadly enough, the real world was getting younger and younger each time around. But if Kain could learn to see the perceptions of the world through his parents eyes, then maybe he would be alright. Maybe he would see the world, but as his own world. As a place where things happened because they were part of a story, not because they were part of terror or ugliness. But because that was how life worked. Because sex was not sex, it was making love. Because when humans were human, error occurred. But when humans were mechanical, life didn't. It was about finding the equilibrium. Finding the meaning; even in an event who's meaning had got entirely lost, and whose merit had been confused to the world.
But not to them.
Never to them.
Everything that had worth was obvious.
And everything that they treasured was theirs. Hidden. Obvious to them. The world trough their eyes. But maybe not someone else's.
Because the world through the eyes of another, is a totally different world.
The world through the eyes of a lover, is a totally unique world.
-
Kain grew up to become very much like his father. He studied exceptionally hard and topped his classes. He participated in school activities. He built up a private empire in commerce, with his father's help, and would one day join it to the Ootori Empire.
He had his mothers hair colour, and her gentle wave. He had his father's eyes, unhindered by glasses but cold and quick on circumstance, soft and smooth in private. Like glassed onyx. He stood tall, straight, proper. He spoke like a gentleman, and in three languages. English, French and Japanese. He rode horses and had a short scar under his chin from a particularly spectacular fall.
There were now two horses in the paddock. An aged, proud, bay and a spectacular grey Warmblood. Zero spent much of his time in pasture. His owner rode her son's horse and spent an hour a day talking to her old friend while Kain rode under her guidance and Tachi's sharp eye.
"Hey old bean." Yuuki ran her fingers over his nose one morning. "What's happening?"
Zero nuzzled into her neck, his ears pricked forward.
The girl laughed. She was still a girl. And she still laughed. "Yes. I know. Wait." She dug into her jeans and pulled out a box of sugar cubes. "Mm. I know what you want for breakfast. You're like Kain when he was five."
"That was ten years ago!" The boy thundered past on his horse, smiling cheekily at her. His voice was deep. Baritone. Pleasant. He was warming his horse down.
"Oi. Heels down. Gulliver's to headstrong for you." She called back.
"For me?" Kain called over his shoulder and laughed. "What about you?"
"Don't get smart young man. It's muddy. Make sure his footing is right."
He waved dismissively at her. He didn't compete. He rode for the fun of it. For the fitness. In his spare time, Kain played basketball and rode horses. He also read extensively. Like his father and mother.
Yuuki turned back to her old friend. "It's funny hey? How he is. Like me a bit huh? Cocky like his father though."
Zero snorted.
"Yeah. I knew you'd like that." Pause. "Hey boy. I'll be seeing you, hey?"
The horse pressed his head into her chest. The girl wrapped her arms around his head and felt him tug back. His ears pricked forward and he nickered happily. He won. As per usual.
"Good boy." Yuuki ran a hand down his face. "You're a good boy." She kissed the white on his face. "You're my kindred spirit, huh?" She blew into a nostril. "I love you Zero. Thank you, so much."
The horse gently breathed against her palm. His head turned when the grey Warmblood burst into the paddock and danced around happily, coming to greet him.
"Okay boy. I can see. Bye."
Zero snorted goodbye and trotted off to his new friend.
Kain wrapped an arm around his mothers shoulder. "Ready to go wake dad up?"
Yuuki smiled. "No. He'll wake himself up."
"How soon?"
"Soon." His mother smiled and pinched her son.
There was a pause. "Ah. Mother, your boots are muddy. You cannot go into the house like that."
"That is why we take them off at the door."
"There is no fun in that." He had her mischievous side.
"Kain? What?" Yuuki's eyes widened in realisation. "No." She began to pull away. "Don't you dare. I will ground yo..."
Her protest turned into a small cry of surprise as her son swept her off her feet and over his shoulder. "You're such a little lady." He said smugly.
"Oi! Let me down!" The girl cried and smacked his back. "Kain. This instant!" Pause. "NOW!"
Her son was laughing.
"Stop laughing."
He continued.
"Stop it or I will have your head."
"But you're so close to it."
"Don't get smug with me. You might be strong but oh my gosh you are pig headed."
"Who's gene is that?"
Pause. "Both."
"Yes. I thought as much." Kain opened the porch door, his mother still slung over his shoulder.
Tachi was sitting in the kitchen, drinking coffee. He'd come up as his young student warmed down. "Ah. Mail."
"Ahahaha. Not funny." Yuuki said as her son turned to close the door.
"You need to rein him in...In a manner of speaking." Pause. "You'd think you'd have learnt by now dear." The man said flatly. And then burst out laughing. "How many times is that this week?"
"Three." Kain said proudly, carrying the woman through the kitchen. It was a game he and Tachi played. An odd, twisted, boy game that made no sense except to those playing it.
"You're getting strong!" Tachi called down the hall.
"No I'm not!" The boy cried back. His mother did not weigh much. And he never let her forget it.
Yuuki smacked him in the back. Being a piece of luggage was a popular pastime ever since her son had worked out that he was strong and fit and healthy. And ever so slightly haughty and roguish beneath his hard work ethic and cool demeanour. "You're a brute."
"And dad needs to wake up. It's late." They'd spent a long time in the arena that morning.
"It's Saturday. He can sleep." The girl lowered her voice as they reached her bedroom. "Shh..."
"DAD!" Kain cried victoriously as he opened the door. "I come with gifts!"
Kyoya didn't respond.
"Father. Dearest father." The young man said smugly. "It's a wonderful gift."
There was a growl from under the covers.
Kain set his mother down on the end of the bed. She crossed her arms and glared at him. "That's not funny."
"It is and you know it."
"I carried you around. And now..."
"Role reversal!" Her son clapped. His eyes shone happily. His mother knew he was just playing. She hadn't been entirely displeased. Just amused to the point where it was annoying.
"Shut...up...." Came the grumble from the top of the bed.
"Ah." Kain jumped onto the empty side of the bed and pulled the covers off his father's shoulder. "Its eight dear father. The sun has long been up to say hello."
Mumble.
"So has ma. She's been up a while. Think about that. She's been awake, you haven't." His son pointed out. "Dad. Tamaki would have said 'Morning person happy!' So...UP!"
"If you are morning happy right now, then I don't want to be." Came the snark reply. The Host Club still met weekly. Were still friends. The twins had married and learnt how to extend sibling love into more. Hunny and Mori were constant; they did not need to marry to be as happy as their friends.
Yuuki smiled and squeezed her husband's foot. "He spends too much time with Tamaki and Kenji."
Her son laughed. "They're both morning people."
"And utterly annoying." Mumble. The Suoh younger had turned out as miniature of Suoh older. Only slightly less exuberant.
"They taught me the way of the Host Club."
"You need to learn your own way." Said his mother sweetly.
"You need to get out of the host club." Kyoya said, sitting up groggily.
"Dad," Kain leant on his elbow and affectionately looked at his father. "You were in the host club. I'm learning through it."
"Learning what?" Slightly cocky.
Kain listlessly picked at the covers."What did you learn?"
Kyoya made no reply.
His son petted his father's head lovingly and stood up. "I told you dad, I want the company. I'll take it and best it. So don't worry about stress. I love it, just like you."
"Best it?"
"Of course. You did from your father. Let's make it tradition."
Yuuki pulled her boots off and threw them at the young man. "Get out." She hissed playfully.
Kain raised his hands defensively. She'd missed. "Alright. Alright. Sorry."
"No you're not."
"No, I'm not. But it makes you feel better." He kissed his mother happily on the cheek. "Love you both."
"Uhuh." She waved him away.
When the door was shut, Kyoya collapsed back down onto his pillow. "He's not hanging out with Tamaki anymore."
"No. He's just happy because it's the weekend." Yuuki crawled up beside him. "I was like that."
"You were not."
"Okay, no. I wasn't. But he gets that from me."
"No. He gets that from Tamaki." His stand in uncle. One of many.
"You never got anything from Tamaki."
Mumble.
"He and Kenji are great friends. Like you and Tamaki had been. Kain isn't you though. He's just him. And he's happy. And smart. And healthy..."
"And hauls you around the house."
Yuuki laughed softly. "That's just him being playful."
"My left foot." Her husband said groggily.
"You love him." She said smugly.
"I do." Kyoya pulled her close to him.
"I love him."
"Mm."
"He's so cool." Yuuki smiled into her husband chest.
She smelled like roses. And fresh straw. "I love you." The man said quietly, slipping back into sleep.
"Mm." His wife turned her head up and kissed him sweetly. "I love you too." He still smelled as he always had. Still spoke in the same way. He was still Kyoya. And they still fell asleep together when she came in every morning. To wake up in each other every day.
Time did not change the capacity in which people loved. People changed that. People changed to adapt. If they did it together, then their capacity did not change. It altered for the time. But it altered together. And they stayed together.
Yuuki loved her husband. And he loved her. And together, they loved their son. And he loved them. And his mother. And his father.
It was a circle that had no beginning and no end. That just was. That always had been. And always would be.
For all eternity. Forever and a day.
-
I'm seeing so much clearer looking through your eyes
I could never find a safer place even if I tried
All the times I've needed you, you've never left my side
I'm clinging to your every word
Don't ever let me go
You'll never let me go
(Wrapped in your arms, Fireflight)
-
The day Kain graduated was the day Yuuki and Kyoya returned to the balcony. Their balcony. And looked over the gardens again. The trees were bigger. The grass just as green. It was early evening and the first few stars had come out to play.
"He's amazing. Like you." Yuuki turned to Kyoya. There was a party inside. It was muted by the glass. "Like me?"
"Like you. Graduates an heir to the biggest Empire in Japan. Has wonderful friends. Loves what he does. And can move forward without dropping everything that was behind."
"I kept the baggage though."
"Mm. So did I."
Kyoya stood beside her on the balcony. "It all worked out as it should have."
"What?" His wife glanced at him happily. "A son with a passion for your passions. Who is smart. Top of his classes. Fit. Athletic. Wonderful. Amazing?"
"Exactly." Came the smug reply.
"We were blessed. Not for a long time. But we were."
There was a long silence. Like those in the beginning. Long, comfortable silences. Ones of understanding and thought.
"What are you thinking?" Kyoya said smoothly.
"I'm thinking that it would have been nice to have had another."
"Another child?"
"Yes." She turned to him. "Kain lived his whole life as a single child."
"Did he?"
Yuuki thought and then smiled softly. "No. I guess not." He'd lived his whole life with everything he wanted. Everything the loved. And he learned to fight. And hurt. And get through it all for the good at the end. At the very end.
"Things turned out the best. We are some of the very few who can say that."
"If I hadn't come to Ouran, none of this would have happened."
"If you hadn't fallen off your horse."
"Or tripped on the ice." Yuuki glanced down at the gardens. Everything that had happened, every bad thing, every good thing; had brought her to him. Closer to him. "I would never have reached here."
"No." Kyoya said softly. "Neither would I." Like geese, they flew together. To help the other. No one dropped back. No one got left behind. No one was inhibited.
There was another long silence.
Yuuki hugged her husband. "It's another chapter over. Another one. Kyoya, we're getting old."
Her husband rubbed her back. "Darling, you and I will never get old. Can't you understand that?"
She shook her head. "Remember our graduation?" She laughed. "I was so mad at you. So upset. I was so lost and hurt. But you found me again. You fixed me up. "
"I was a bastard."
"You were. But I threw shoes."
"That you did." Kyoya smiled. "But that's in the past. You're here."
Kyoya ran his fingers across her cheek. It was smooth. Pale like a white peach. And soft. Yuuki caught his hand and kissed his palm. She was crying. "You never came for me. In London. You never came. I hated you for not coming. And I'm sorry."
Her husband slid his thumb over a tear and erased it. He kissed the ghost that remained. "I'm sorry."
"Don't say sorry. Please don't say sorry. I had loved you so much, and then I hated you. But I still loved you. Just the same. And it hurt me. Because I missed a whole year of us. A year. I miss you every time you walk away and every time you go on a business trip and you're not there are night. And I missed a whole year. And I'm sorry."
Kyoya kissed the next tear. And the next. And he kissed her for all the times she'd hurt herself. All the time's she'd needed someone and only found a spirit in the closet. Only found herself in the mirror. "Don't apologise. I've told you this before. You have nothing to be sorry about. I always loved you. I always did. I didn't always fight to best my brothers. I didn't always want more than just money. But I always wanted you. And then I lost you. And..."
Yuuki kissed him. Long and deep. She clutched onto him and breathed in the moments they'd lost. She gave them back to him. "Promise me that when eternity comes, you'll never ever, ever let my hand."
"Never ever." He promised and kissed her back. "I couldn't because I'd never want to."
"You will keep me safe. And you will keep me close. And rain, will make the flowers grow." Yuuki sang faintly, her tone light. All was forgiven. All. Including themselves and time.
Les Miserables had brought them back to each other. Brought The Miserable Ones back. And 'healed their wounds with words of love.' They were heaven blessed.
Time would go on, with or without them. But their time would go on longer. Their world would go on longer. It would stretch past earthly time.
The scars they had were reminders of this.
Reminders that they wanted to fight for themselves. That they were willing to hurt for each other. To understand each other. And to finally, be with the other. Forever. Dancing. In the snow. Just like the first time.
And he still looked the same to her. He was still as handsome. Still the same man.
And she still looked the same to him. She was still as beautiful. Still the same woman.
Absolutely captivating. Breathtaking.
They were the ones that had taken down the others walls for a look and had been handed the key to the gate. No demolition. Just trust. Respect.
And memories. Of the times when she'd burnt her fingers on the stove and travelled in a luggage cart. Of when they fought over Christmas presents and he won; always. Of when she'd learnt to fly over jumps and right into him. Of when he'd found his heart. Of magic of real life.
The little lines by her eyes were just her smile and the ones on him from all the times she'd made him laugh when he hadn't even felt remotely like doing so. Their hair was turning silver, a truth of their eternity. The stars and the snow caught in them. Now in their hair and in his eyes. The pool black of night in hers. To complete the other. Each scar, each wrinkle, each grey hair was a moment that could never be forgotten. They were the gifts of their story. Them. Carved into the others skin. And were continually doing so. A pure, living artwork. Of them.
The future of them.
-
Your eyes are full, full of the future of us
It is as if, I knew you before we spoke
You're playing the chords of me that nobody knew how to play
Your eyes are full, full of the future of us
(The Thief, Brooke Fraser)
-
Kain went to university. He met a girl there. Her name was Mai and she studied art.
They were complete opposites and they argued about everything.
But they fell in love. Absolutely, hopelessly in love.
When the girl came over for dinner, Yuuki and Kyoya couldn't help but smile. They understood everything about the bubble that was forming. Their sons bubble. Like their own.
He was still entirely part of their world. Part of their private atmosphere; but he was creating his own. He was grown up. And an individual. And he loved his parents and extended as they had to love another equally so.
Kain married Mai and three years later; he became the head of the Ootori group.
His parents retired into their house. To each other.
To the piano and the walls. Their Christmas gift.
Another winter memory.
Like falling over in the snow. And making snowmen with a young Kain where the ice man had cherry red lips made of cherries and a button nose made of a giant wooden button.
And snow angels. Proof that they were, to each other, a gift from heaven.
All three of them.
The house was empty after Kain left. Yuuki wandered through it with a cup of tea and stood at his bedroom door. She remembered a time when it had been a nursery. When it had smelled like boiled peas. When she had painted Kyoya.
"He's still our son." The always strong voice came from behind her. "He's just somebody else's lover."
"And they'll last." Came the melancholy reply. "Like us. They'll last like us. They'll spend every day as if it was the first day they fell in love and they'll learn so many things from each other."
"And she'll put the laptop in the inbox." Kyoya wrapped her in his arms and kissed her head.
"And he'll try to feed her wasabi in a cafe on top of a mountain." Yuuki closed her fingers around his wrists. "But they won't. They'll just feel that same thing."
"Like wedding nights." The gift that kept on giving. That could never be refunded. There was no refund on their love.
"Like wedding nights." Came the whispered reply. "I never came back to this earth."
"Neither did I." The man kissed her head. "Neither did I."
They'd both gone somewhere where heaven existed constantly, just because the other person did. Where pleasure was an entity, not a moment. Where love meant you could very strongly dislike the person and still want to breath their breath and melt into their skin. To sacrifice, not because they deserved it, but because you loved them.
"Kyoya. I'm scared."
"Of what?"
"Never seeing you smile again."
"Darling. Dear Yuuki. How could you forget?"
She turned around and pressed her lips to his. Memorising the way the adored hers, just at touch. They way it tingled everywhere they touched. Like little bolts of pleasant electricity. Like the universe condensed between them.
The girl looked at her husband. All she could see was the man she was in love with. "I won't forget. I won't ever not see it."
Kyoya smiled. "Now you understand."
When they said eternity together, they meant eternity together. With each other. Smiling and dancing and fighting and learning.
-
Many years later, after their grandchildren, the extension of them, had grown tall, they decided it was time. It was time.
Yuuki locked herself into Kyoya as they lay in bed that night. He was her life force and she needed him. "I think our love can take us away together."
Kyoya ran his fingers through her hair. She was timeless. And she was him. He wasn't anything without her. Nothing at all. "I think our love can do anything we want it to."
The girl smiled. She was still a girl. No matter what. His girl. His eternity. He was her eternity. Not her forever. But her eternity. Her heaven. A place she could dwell when their time ended. "I love you. Kyoya. I never didn't. Never when I got on that plane. Not even when I was born. I never didn't love you. Before I came to be I love you. I just didn't know it." She breathed.
The man kissed her head, her eyelids, her cheekbones, her jaw, her chin. He lingered above her mouth and stared right into her eyes. Right into her. And he couldn't see the bottom. She was still a mystery to him. And he wouldn't have had it any other way. He understood her mysteries. Even if he never would work them out. "I love you." He pressed his lips gently against hers. "You rescued me."He kissed her again. "This isn't the end. It's just the beginning."
Yuuki held him closer to herself. They didn't need to say the things that they were saying. They knew. But sometimes saying it, making it real to the world, gave others something. It emanated from them and when spoken into words was profound and deep. Even if it was just one word.
Love.
"I love you." Yuuki kissed his throat.
"I love you, Yuuki."
"Good night. I'll be seeing you."
"No. You'll never lose sight of me. For eternity."
She smiled. "Eternity."
"Are you ready?"
"Are you?"
"If you hold my hand." He admitted one final time.
They locked their fingers together. Locked them together.
"Good night, Yuuki."
The girl closed her eyes and rested her head into her lover's neck. The man shut his and breathed her in. She was not his wife. He was not her husband. They were more than that. So much more. And always would be. Always had been. For an eternity before. And for every eternity to come. There was no after. Never for them. It was just them.
They died that night. Together.
Kain found them in bed, in each other's arms. As if they were sleeping there, as they had a thousand times before. They had been born into the world apart and they had left it together. Peacefully. They say love has power that no man can imagine. Well, it had the power to take them at the same time so that their worst fear, to be apart, would never come to be.
Yuuki and Kyoya danced. The snow caught in her hair. Like bubble bath only cool. Something cold, but pleasant. Like him. Something that was a gift, not something disagreeable. Her saviour. Her forever. He kissed her, again and again and he laughed with her. And they were on a balcony in the snow. They didn't look away from each other. And they didn't stop smiling. She stood on his feet, just like the first time, just as beautiful and fresh and loving as the first time, and they waltzed into infinity. Like they always had been.
Everything they did, everything they went through, every single breath they took; their measure of the life, could never and will never be explained in words.
It just was.
And always will be.
-
Goodbye.
by Peterpauper
-
Tonight they said goodbye
They said goodbye
Tonight they said goodbye
Grew wings and learned to fly
Tonight the lovers said goodbye
Tonight they said goodbye
To their friends and family
And left for up on high
It was them or nothing or an empty sky
And they were not nothing
They were just them
And an empty sky was just their friend
It was filled with their life
The stars their smiles
They waved from the heights
And kissed away trials
Tonight the mothers said goodbye
Tonight they said goodbye
They pushed their memories into bags
And lifted themselves to the sky
Tonight the fathers said goodbye
Tonight they said goodbye
They smiled upon their family
And blessed them all goodbye
Tonight those parents said goodbye
Goodbye, goodbye
Tonight the parents said goodbye
And left their babies
All grown and high
Tonight they went together
Together, goodbye
Tonight they went together
And ascended up on high
Tonight they went together
Because there had never been anything else
And tonight they said goodbye
To go live somewhere else
Eternity in each other
Just as it had always been
Eternity in each other
As none had ever seen
Tonight, goodbye
Together, goodbye
They said goodbye
Tonight they said goodbye
Grew wings and learned to fly
-----