Chapter 8: Memory Loss

Claire's POV:

Ok, so what if he was here? That didn't mean anything! Someone knocks on my door. I open it up.

"Vaughn, what are you doing here?" I ask him.

"Come with me," he says.

"Where, and why?"

"Can't I just explain once we get there?"

"Fine, let's go," I say.

Vaughn is a nice guy. I trust him.

He took me down to the music room where Skye was playing the piano.

"That's beautiful," I say. "But I still have no idea why you-"

My speech is cut short as Vaughn kisses me.

Ok, scratch that. Vaughn was a nice guy. I trusted him.

I hear a gasp and we break apart to see Kai standing there. He looks angry as he storms off, and then both Vaughn and Skye laugh hysterically.

"What was that?" I ask.

"Oh come on, isn't it obvious by now? Kai totally likes you, and we just need him to make a move. You're welcome," Vaughn says.

"You guys are jerks!" I say, storming off.

Kai's in this little garden, pulling up weeds.

"Kai?" I ask, going in, still angry.

"What do you want?" he asks.

"It's not about me wanting anything. Are you ok?"

"What do you mean?"

"The guys were just trying to give you a little push that's all; they didn't mean anything by it."

"So you're not dating him?"

"No, why would I?"

"I was just afraid you had forgotten our promise, that's all."

I blush rapidly and can't speak. "W-what?" I stutter. "You know…it's…"

"Yea Claire, I'm not that dense. I thought you were avoiding me. Why are you here?"

"I am avoiding you," I sputter.

"Good work," he says, rolling his eyes.

"What are you doing here? I thought you…"

"Remember, I only open up the shack during summer. Apart from that I go to school, just like you."

"Why are you so down then?"

"You're avoiding me," he replies.

"Kai…"

"Look I get it," he says, smiling at me. The smile doesn't reach his eyes. I'm surprised he'd even try that with me. "It was a summer fling. I'll let it go okay?"

"No that's not what I-"

But he's gone.

"You know, this has been the best summer of my life, but it's still going to end," he says, stroking my hair. My head was in his lap and we were listening to the beat of the water against the waves. It was getting late, but it didn't matter to me.

"We won't end though," I say. "We'll be like the sea, wild and infinite."

He kisses my head. "You say that now, but when the summer ends, what do you think is going to happen? We can't stay together like this forever. All good things come to an end."

"I accept that," I say, sighing. "But we have right now. Right now, we can be infinite. And…we'll see each other again ok? And then we have to stay together. It'll be a sign. When we see each other apart from the summer, it means we're destined for something!"

He looks at me, smiling. "It's a promise. I…I think I'm falling in love with you," he says, blushing.

I smile widely. "I love you too."

The summer days went by slower after that, for which I was grateful, and we both dreaded the end of the summer. Tensions were running high, and that's when we got into our argument.

"Where are you going after the summer ends?" Kai asks.

"Nowhere," I say defensively. If he knew that I basically hid myself away because I was scared of what people would say…

"Oh right, that explains the bags huh?" he says, raising his eyebrows.

"That's just…I'm going to go visit my mom."

"Why not during the summer?"

"Because I farm during the summer," I say, then feel like slapping myself. Why did I say that?

"So what do you do the rest of the year?"

I can't think of anything to say. "Nothing."

"Claire, what is it?" he pesters.

"It's nothing okay? It's my problem, not yours!"

"I thought we shared our problems now! After all we're…"

"We're what? We're nothing! We're two people trying to live out these lives that are eventually just going to fall apart!"

"I thought you were the one who said you wanted to fight for it," he says, not raising his voice.

"Exactly. I'm not going to pressure you into staying with me when you obviously don't want to!"

"Is that what this is about? Claire c'mon, you know I'm in love with you! I'd do anything if we could stay together! That's why I want to know where you're going! We might be able to meet up or something like that," Kai says.

"No!" I yell suddenly. "Fine, you want to know? You want to know that badly where it is that I'm going. I'm leaving okay? I go to school in Paris where no one can be there to piss me off about how I'm a farmer's daughter! No one's going to know who I am, and I LOVE that. I love how no one knows that my dad's dead and I spend my summers on a farm instead of touring the world like them!"

"Are you ashamed of your life here?" he asks.

"Yea, want to know why? Because only FREAKS are farmers! Only people who have no money and too much land become FARMERS."

"How dare you?! Your father, your own father was a farmer! Everyone here farms to survive! How could you just…do that to them? The Claire I know would never alienate or defile her own father's name!"

"Well guess what, you don't know the real Claire! You've never known the real Claire! You never WILL know the real Claire! The real Claire is the popular rich blonde who goes to school in Paris and who everyone likes, not a random farm girl who falls in love with the first cute guy she meets. I'm not that much of a pushover!"

"Fine," he says, exiting my room. "If I don't know you then there's no point of me staying any further. Have a good 3 years, and a life after that. Do whatever you want. We end here."

He moves out my sight and at first I just sit there, on the floor, looking out the window, willing him to come back. But he doesn't. He hadn't raised his voice at me during the argument, regardless of how rude I'd been, how loud I'd shouted. I finish up my packing and hurriedly leave the village, without telling anyone why I'd gone home early. I didn't owe anyone here anything. Being here hadn't cleared my mind. Kai had only distracted me from trying to find my dad. These past 2 months had been a complete waste of time. I didn't want a summer fling. I didn't want ANYTHING except my dad! And he was gone! Fate didn't want me to get anything right in life did it?

I mounted a horse and waved off the couple of people who'd gone to say goodbye to me. Finally, I could get back to being myself. Masks were hard to uphold, especially when people kept trying to pry them off.