3. Memories
"Kate, we have visitors."
A grey warship approached to them.
"Uhm, speak of the devil and he shall appear, isn't it?" Kate said while she looked at it with the binoculars.
"Southern Cross, this is Australian warship Hammersley. Stop all engines, we intend to board you," the radio announced.
Kate grabbed the microphone and answered. "This is the Southern Cross to the HMAS Hammersley. We are an Australian flagged vessel and the law states that you cannot board us without due reason," Kate answered.
"Southern Cross, we are aware. May we be allowed to board for training purposes?
"Ok, Hammersley, be my guest." Kate stopped the engines and both women leaned against the wall of the wheelhouse to watch the RHIB being launched.
"There was a time when we were onboard that RHIB," Rebecca said.
Kate nodded. "Yeah, indeed. I'm curious to know who's still on board."
The RHIB stopped along the vessel and the sailors jumped on board. Some were stopped in their tracks as they saw who stood in front of them
"Kate! Bomber! You're here, what a surprise!" Dutchy exclaimed. He gave Kate a wink, and gently squeezed her arm.
"X! How's this possible! And Bomber? You too?" Bird's eyes widened as she took in her ex-colleagues.
"X, they are ex-crew of the Hammersley."
The actual XO looked puzzled, and looked from his team to the two women. "Ok, I'm Lieutenant Wilkinson, nice to meet you." He shook hands with them both.
"Charlie 2 to X-ray 2, what's going on?" The message came from the bridge.
"X-ray 2 to Charlie 2. Nothing Ma'am. We just met some old colleagues of yours." He turned back to the two ladies. "What are your names?" he asked them.
"Rebecca Brown and Kate McGregor," Kate answered.
"A Rebecca Brown and Kate McGregor, Ma'am," he passed onto the bridge.
Then he made a face and held the microphone from his ear. "What? Kate and Bomber? Invite them on board, ASAP!"
"Yes Ma'am," he said, lifting his eyebrows. "Uh, our boss invites you on board. Will you come along? I'll leave two men here to watch your boat. Bird, Harpie, you stay here."
They sat silent in the RHIB while it returned to the Hammersley. When it was winched on board Rebecca tapped Kate on her shoulder. "I have some mixed feelings coming here back."
"Yeah, me too. I've got many happy memories here, but also a few extremely bad ones, especially the last."
When they climbed down, someone was waiting for them. "Kate, Bomber?"
"Nikki, you're here?" They gave each other a hug.
"Come, from the moment my crew has finished saying hello, I'll offer you a brew." Nikki said. Meanwhile the others were joining to see the long lost ex-sailors.
In the officers mess
"Nikki, so you're now the commander of the Hammersley. Since when?" Kate asked.
"About six years ago. I was promoted to Lieutenant-Commander and transferred in a rush. I had to complete a commander training course and then got posted back on the Hammersley. I've got Harry Wilkinson as my XO. You and Mike both disappeared and the Brass didn't say a word. I couldn't even get anything out of Maxine. It's only from rumours that I heard what had happened. I'm sorry Kate, it's your job I'm doing now."
"Never mind, so be it," Kate said.
Damn, it still hurts!
"And you? Are you now together with Mike?" Nikki asked.
"No, I'm not," Kate answered briefly.
"Oh, that surprises me. Do you know where…"
"No, I don't know," Kate quickly answered again.
"Nikki, can you tell me where Mi…" Rebecca asked.
"Becca. No!" Kate snapped at her.
Nikki looked surprised. She looked from one to the other, not knowing what to think about it.
"Ok, ok, what are you doing nowadays?" Nikki asked.
"I have a small company of cabin cruisers that do leisure tours, and Rebecca is my newest skipper."
"Oh, great! You're back on track, that's really great! What's the name of the company?"
"South Pacific Discovery Cruises."
"Wow, sounds jolly good!"
"Can I see the others?" Asked Kate.
"Yeah go ahead. Swaino is on watch and Charge hangs around there too."
When Kate left the mess, Rebecca pulled Nikki's arm."Nikki, can you tell me where Mike is now? You can email or text me," she whispered and handed over her card.
Nikki frowned. "What's going on for God's sake?"
Rebecca shook her head. "Later, it's a really touchy subject. One wrong word and she'll get mad at us and bite our heads off!"
"Ok, got it."
When she left the mess, she bumped into 2Dads."Hey Rebecca, it's been a long time. It's just great you're here again."
"Hi Leo," Rebecca said coolly.
"Are you on shore leave in a couple of days? Maybe we can go on a date?"
"No Leo. Not for now. It's over, you know."
"Ok okok. Maybe later on. You can always call me!"
"Yeah, I'll think about it," she said heading to the bridge to the others.
Afterwards, when Dutchy brought them back to the boat he snatched a little word with Kate. "I know we've kept in touch by email, but we haven't met up at any point. Are you okay?"
"I'm fine."
"How's Stephanie?"
"She's ok, and she's growing," she said with a smile.
"We should arrange to have lunch or something, when I'm on shore. What do you think?"
"Hmm good idea, I'll text you."
"Great, fair winds to you both." He entered the RHIB to return.
"You and Dutchy are still friends, are you?" Rebecca said while they were looking at the RHIB.
"Yeah, that's one of the only good things that I have left. But don't start reading into it. We're just friends, Kate said in defence.
"Don't tell me stories. The way you talk about it, tells me there's more to it," she said laughing.
"And what about you and 2Dads?" Kate tried to put Rebecca on another track.
"Nothing. You know him, hey? You can't rely on him. On duty, he's okay, but on shore? Nope."
"That was my impression too."
Later on that day.
"What kind of customers do we have?" Rebecca asked.
"Daily tours along the coast line. Visits to the mangroves. Backpackers who want to make a trip to one of these tropical islands. Divers. From time to time, a short cruise for a few days along the islands."
"Hmm, nice mixture. And how does it work?"
"Helen, the lady at the desk, who's married to Captain Steve Marshall, by the way, makes the reservations. She works here part-time, for something to do/as a hobby. We will customise the itineraries. On days when only one boat has been reserved, you will sail it, and I'll remain in the office, or do any maintenance."
"And what if they ask for extras?"
"It depends on how busy your schedule is, what supplies you have and the fuel level. We cannot be late for other customers."
Rebecca nodded. "Ok."
Kate's place
In the late afternoon they moored and filled the fuel tanks. They went both their own way and Kate passed by Maxine's to pick up Stephanie. After dinner Kate played a bit with Stephanie and put her to bed. She poured herself a glass of white wine, went to the terrace and sat down to overlook the bay.
Becca's questions and the encounter with the Hammersley have brought all the emotions back to the surface.
Six years ago.
The patrol was done, we had shore leave and he asked me for dinner in the local restaurant. Delightful, without any cares, we laughed a lot, we could finally enjoy each other. I had no idea that someone saw us. Afterwards, we were in a good mood and I asked him to come to my place. We fooled around with each other and had a splendid night together. But the same guy had seen us enter my place together. Why did he do that?
A couple of days later, Maxine called us and told us that we had to come to Navcom. She sounded unhappy, rather gloomy.
The moment we entered that room I was startled. It was a Captain's table - a captain in the middle and a commander next to him. I had never seen them before. Maxine sat on the other side of the captain and she looked like she had been through the wringer. This was not good. I looked at Mike, but he wouldn't look at me.
The captain started off by accusing us of breaking the non-fraternisation rules. We were seen at the restaurant and at my home. We couldn't deny it. There was a witness, a young lieutenant who just arrived at the base. We had to admit we knew each other for longer than just that date. Painful. Our excuse that we didn't bring our relationship on board made no sense. Luckily for us they didn't know about our relationship at ADFA. As a commander and executive officer we had to set an example and we didn't. No excuse! He wanted to make an example of us. His words are still etched in my brain: 'Lieutenant McGregor, your behaviour is not a good befitting of an officer of the Navy and we cannot tolerated it. That means that your career ends here. You are no longer in the Navy, effective immediately.'
I must have been pale white and I was dizzy. I was biting back my tears to keep up appearances for the last time. 'Dismissed!' I left the room and outside I leaned against the wall, letting my tears flow. Why me? Is it such a crime to love someone?
In the room I heard the same accusation against Mike. 'Taking in account your perfect service record, you are demoted to leading seaman from now on. Dismissed.' He went out, threw an irritated glance at me and continued.
"Mike! Wait." He didn't stop. I ran after him and grabbed his sleeve, but he pulled away from me. "Leave me alone!" he said and left the building.
Meanwhile, the doorbell was ringing. Kate finally noticed and she hurried to the door while wiping the tears from her cheeks.
My God, I hope that that bell wasn't ringing for too long. Stephanie will wake up from it.
It was Maxine. "Hey Max, what brings you here now?"
"Hi Kate, today I thought Stephanie caught a cold and I wanted to know how she is now, but …My God, what happened? You look awful!" Maxine expressed surprised.
"Max… I know… I'm … a mess actually," Kate sobbed while she stepped aside to let Maxine entering the house.
"Tell me, what happened? Is something wrong with the boat?" Maxine asked worried. Maxine took Kate to the couch where she put her arm around her. Kate took a deep breath and grabbed a few tissues.
"No, the boat is fine. But I thought everything was in the past. I have a lovely daughter, a good company, a new boat and an old friend who's now my new skipper. But Rebecca asked me why I wasn't in the Navy anymore and who Stephanie was. She couldn't know that. And as the cherry on the cake we encountered the Hammersley today. I experienced everything again," she sobbed.
Maxine was rubbing her back.
"When I think about how it ended between Mike and me, I'm so disappointed."
"Was it that bad?"
"Yes, it was. Worse!" She said huskily.
"The day of the captain's table he ran away from Navcom without telling me anything. At home I tried to call and text him, but he did not respond. That evening I went to his place. He let me in, but I noticed he had been drinking and he was angry. I asked him what did we do now but he shouted back saying that I was Princess Perfect and that I had to know. He yelled at me too, asked me why he deserved that.
I was so astonished that I yelled back, telling him that it was not my fault either.
Then things became worse. He yelled at me, saying that I was blaming him, and that I was saying it was his fault that we had sex. He said it had been my idea because I invited him to come back to my place that night. I said he started it because he invited me for dinner in the first place. Then he said I always twisted things so that they would suit me. I was so angry, I said that wasn't true. I turned around and told him that none of this would ever have happened if he had taken that shore posting.
He got really mad then.
'Oh yes,' he said. 'That would work for you, wouldn't it? Me on shore and you with your promotion and command. First you let me believe that you loved me, and then you let me make love to you, for what? So that I would recommend you for promotion?' Then he said that it was all becoming crystal clear to him, that when we started our relationship at ADFA it was for the same reasons. He seemed to be convinced that I only slept with people to advance my career. I was so upset that I shouted at him, and asked him if he thought I was some kind of prostitute. He said he believed so.
I was so humiliated and furious that I slapped him in the face. He slapped me back, yelling at me that I was a traitor, and that I had to get out now. I ran out and slammed the door as hard as I could. I stopped and leaned against the wall, my cheek was so painful. I pulled myself together before I went to my car, but as I went to leave he started throwing all the clothes I had at his place out of the window.
It was awful. I had to grab everything, dresses, pants, shoes, underwear. It was really humiliating. So, as revenge, I drove home, put all of his stuff in a garbage bag and put it outside.
I was so upset, I cried the whole night."
Kate stared blankly at the coffee table while Maxine was holding and comforting her tears running down her cheeks.
"I didn't know that," Maxine whispered.
"I couldn't image he could be like that. We both felt guilty and we started blaming each other, but what he said, that really hurt me."
"I didn't know about ADFA either. It started back then and carried on?" Maxine asked softly.
"Not really. He left me at ADFA without giving me a reason. I saw him again when I was posted to the Hammersley."
All the time Kate had been staring at the coffee table when she was telling the story, but now she turned to Maxine.
"Max?"
"Yes Kate?"
"Did you see him meanwhile?"
Maxine sighed. "A few times after the Captain's table for administration and then by accident at the base in Darwin. It was weird, because he was so estranged, just like he didn't know me anymore. That has hurt because we were friends."
Kate nodded and wanted to say something, but they were sidetracked by a little voice.
"Mummy, I can't sleep.
Why are you so sad?
Can I see the new boat as well and can Maxine come also?"
That broke the tension. Kate pulled Stephanie onto her lap and gave her a hug.
"Mummy, when can you get me a daddy?"
Kate and Maxine looked at each other not knowing what to say.