Chapter 13-Revenge
O'Hair: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU LET THEM LIVE?
Narrator: It was a few days after Brüno's death. Gen. Weavile and Felicia came into O'Hair's office and reported the incident. Madalyn Murray O'Hair was absolutely p*ssed!
Gen. Weavile: (nervously) AH! Well…uh…eh…oh! Uh…
O'Hair: OUT WITH IT!
Gen. Weavile: IVAN BEAT BRÜNO WITH A HATCHET AND HE TRIED TO SHOOT US! BRÜNO TOOK ALL OF OUR WEAPONS AND WENT ROGUE WITH INTENT TO KILL THE LADY! WE HAD NO WAY TO DEFEND OURSELVES WHEN IVAN BRUTALLY MURDERED BRÜNO!
O'Hair: The Aura Guardian has waged war with our nation. We will crush Mewuskovia later.
Narrator: Felicia and the General were stunned. Their jaws hit the floor.
Felicia: D-Dear Leader, why the wait?
O'Hair: I will have my creation test his skills on the villager when he is complete.
Gen. Weavile: Are you sure you can wait all 5 years?
O'Hair: It will be a stretch, but I'll wait. (pets Zoroark in desk beside her) We will destroy them, won't we, Drako?
Narrator: In case you did not know, O'Hair happened to own a pet Zoroark. This Zoroark, Drako, happened to be the brother of Felicia. How they both came to join O'Hair's regime is unbeknownst to many.
Drako: I desire such events, Dear Leader. Say, I thirst for some Monster. General, fetch me a BFC from the downstairs vending machine.
Gen. Weavile: Yes, pet of the Dear Leader. (leaves)
O'Hair: Felicia, bring me some weed. I need to smoke.
Felicia: Yes, Dear Leader.
O'Hair: After that, I need you to take care of my Diglett infestation.
Felicia: (pulls out machine gun) Yes, Dear Leader. (walks away)
Narrator: O'Hair waited for her grass. Meanwhile, the General took care of Drako's needs. He cursed loudly at the vending machine for it had not given him change for his 10,000 bill. Felicia entered the dictator's quarters.
O'Hair: What took so long? (accepts weed from Felicia)
Felicia: My apologies. There was a poor man on your property. So I shot him. The guards are disposing of the body.
O'Hair: I suppose that is a good reason. Now if you please, take care of my infestation.
Felicia: Yes, Dear Leader. (leaves)
Gen. Weavile: (enters) Dear Leader, you need to get your vending machine fixed! I just paid 10,000 for a 500 BFC of Monster!
O'Hair: Bring smaller bills!
Gen. Weavile: (to self) Give me smaller goddamn bills!
O'Hair: WHAT did you say?
Gen Weavile: (nervously) Nothing! (calms down) What's Felicia doing with a gun anyway?
Narrator: Machine gun blasts were heard all around the palace. The shots rang out, shaking up everyone around.
O'Hair: Taking care of our Diglett infestation.
Gen. Weavile: Oh… (long pause) This is rather awkward.
O'Hair: Nothing else, eh?
Gen. Weavile: Let's just wait things out for 5 years. That okay, Dear Leader?
O'Hair: Sure. All I desire is my Ultimate Pokemon. Then we shall conquer Mewuskovia; maybe the Northern Continent, perhaps even the world!