A/N - *Ducks head* No I haven't forgotten this story. I've had major writer's block. But I came up with a twist. Hehe... -A/N
I didn't see Spot for two months after our ill fated dinner at the restaurant. I was pissed, hurt, and scared out of my mind. I was five months pregnant now and it was the end of November. I didn't even see Spot on Thanksgiving.
I wondered what the hell he was playing at, but also realized my errors in our awkward dance. Something had to give. So one cold morning in early December, I bundled myself up, put on some stout walking shoes and gave it as good as I could get walking to Brooklyn.
It took damn near forever. My baby bump was now the size of a large cantaloupe and it made me huff and puff. I had FINALLY put on some weight so I didn't look like an emaciated girl with a round ball shoved down her shirt, but I still was barely at a healthy weight.
Head down, eyes on my feet, I dodged around people and hopped on and off the sidewalk. 'Spot would kill me if he saw me walking on the street' I thought sadly to myself. A cart lumbered by and hit a puddle, splashing me with dirty slush. I didn't even have the heart to call out swears and insults in the driver's wake.
I stopped to catch my breath when I reached the bridge. I saw Tips, one of Spot's boys and he did a double-take when he saw me. Hurrying over, he welcomed me with worried bottle green eyes. I saw that one of them was surrounded by a dark purple bruise.
"Tips...Who're you fighting with?" Tips ducked his shaggy brown-haired head and mumbled something inconsequential underneath his breath. I began to feel like something was rotten in Denmark.
"Why are you walking? Especially on a day like today," Tips waved a gloved hand up towards the gray sky. There was an icy drizzle, it was a tad too warm to snow today. We had actually gotten snow before Thanksgiving though and it lingered on the sidewalks and streets.
"I have to see Spot. It's been two months. TWO MONTHS!." Tips winced and scrubbed a hand through his hair.
"Yeah Riot, I know. We all know. The boss...He isn't the same. I mean he's nasty as ever but he's gotten meaner. Maybe you can talk to him? He's going to get us all hurt."
I processed Tips' statement in silence and stared at him. He was thin, and one of his teeth was chipped. Clearly there was fighting going on in Brooklyn. Pursing my lips I gave Tips a sad look.
"I'll try Tips, but he might not want to see me." Tips shook his head vigorously.
"No you're wrong. He wants to see you so much but he..." Tips stopped himself abruptly and remembered he was talking about his boss. The new mean one. He paled and then waved me along after telling me Spot was probably down at the docks or at Molly O's, his favorite pub.
I checked Molly O's first, and he wasn't there. I was greeted by Molly herself, a buxom, red-haired, red-cheeked woman who had started life off as a street walker but was given her pub by a faithful customer. She had half-raised Spot as much as she could but she told me he was wild even as a little boy.
I hoped that I carried a little girl, I didn't think I could deal with another Spot Conlon. But Molly told me from the way I was carrying that it looked like it was going to be a boy. I frowned, nodded, and left after eating a thick piece of bread slathered with preserves.
Licking the tips of my fingers that poked through my worn forest green gloves, I put a hand onto my belly as the baby moved. It was an indescribable feeling, almost like gas but not quite. The little monkey obviously liked the preserves. I smiled to myself and headed towards the docks, carefully steering clear of icy patches.
There was a boat docked at the end of the newsie's dock and I blinked in surprise. That never happened. Then I squinted as I saw Spot and Action talking to a barrel chested man with rust colored hair and dark blue eyes that I remembered oh so well.
The man put his black bowler hat back onto his head and shook first Spot's hand then Action's, and went back onto his boat. I froze where I was before darting behind a stack of crates. I wanted to talk to Spot, but I wanted to talk to the other man even more.
Action and Spot passed me by, talking lowly to each other. I strained but I couldn't make anything out except 'money' and 'guns'. Steam began pouring out of my ears and I bit my lip hard to keep from jumping out and accosting them.
It took all I had to wait a good ten minutes before I peeked around the crates and saw that the coast was clear. Wiping freezing rain from my face, I pulled my scally cap down tighter and turned the collar on my old Civil War coat up. Stalking down the dock, I listened to the thudding sounds my feet made and my face grew grim as a head popped up from the cabin on the boat.
My chilly gray eyes met shocked blue ones and then the head ducked back inside. Five minutes went by while I waited, my arms crossed in front of me, foot tapping a staccato rhythm on the dock. Then Declan Moody came out onto the deck of the boat, a sheepish grin lighting his face.
"Lily! What a surprise! Why tis fantastic to see ye!" I glowered up at him as he walked down the gangplank and stood before me. He was thinner, and there were shadows in his eyes that hadn't been there before he left New York City for Ireland five months ago.
But he was dressed well, in a warm looking jacket and thick pants. His boots were new and barely scuffed. Declan had left New York after the leader of his gang, a psychotic serial killer had tried to kill me and I had stabbed him in self defense.
"Well Declan! Last I heard of you, you were staying in Ireland to help your Cause." Declan was an anti-English rule of Ireland supporter and his gang had left transporting guns for his precious 'Cause'.
"Aye, well...As such, it just so happens we need more guns and other supplies still." I felt my fingers dig into my arms as I tried so hard to control my temper.
"And that's where Spot comes in?" Declan's face grew even more embarrassed and he looked down at his feet. He had professed to love me before he left, and had wanted me to go to Ireland with him. I had chosen to stay with Spot. Yet here he was again, getting involved in my life again.
"Spot's got amazing contacts for a lad. He is useful." I grabbed the front of Declan's jacket and jerked it sharply. Pulling my own jacket open I stabbed a finger in the direction of my swelling belly.
"Do you see this? Do you? It's Spot's. I NEED HIM. You're going to get him killed." Declan's eyes were locked onto my belly, and I saw his posture stiffen and some of the pleased light go out of his eyes. He looked out over the East River.
"Spot said you'd left him. Gone to live in Manhattan. He said he has a new girl, some Pixie."
I let go of Declan's coat like it had burned me and staggered away to a barrel. I felt sick to my stomach, and it wasn't morning sickness. Declan reached out and steadied me so I didn't fall, his strong hands tight on my upper arms.
"He said that? He said he has a new girl?" My voice was raspy and I cleared my throat as tears burned in my eyes and my nose clogged. Declan swore and pulled a flask out of his pocket.
"Here take a nip of this lass, it'll warm ye." I took the flask and drank gratefully. It was pure whisky, no doubt Irish. It was good. I wanted to drain the flask but knew alcohol wasn't good for the baby. Handing it back regretfully, I stared up at Declan with dead eyes.
"I have to talk to him. I can't believe it's over. Declan...What am I going to do?" Declan clenched his jaw and gave me a guarded look. Then he jerked his head towards the boat.
"You can come with me. I have a small farm in County Mayo. It's not much but I could make you happy. Raise the wee one as my own." My chest tightened and tears slipped down my cheeks.
"You're a good man, Declan Moody." Declan smiled mirthlessly and shook his head.
"But I'm not the one."
"I don't even know anymore," I said hoarsely. Declan took my chin in his large hand and kissed me gently. I tried to feel some of the fire I felt when Spot did it but only felt a lukewarm spark. Still...If he was willing...
"I need to talk to Spot, Declan. I have to figure this out." Declan smiled at me for real this time and nodded, letting me pull away. Waving a hand he told me he'd be here for a few weeks and to take all the time I needed to think.
I walked away even more confused. Spot had TOLD him that Pixie was his new girl? He had ended our relationship? Had it even BEEN a relationship. I put a steadying hand onto my stomach and ground my teeth.
He was damn well going to take care of his baby. If he didn't want me anymore fine, but he wasn't going to deny this child. Stalking furiously up the street, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell, cutting the knee of my pants open and my flesh as well.
Limping, muttering swears underneath my breath I reached the Brooklyn Lodging House. There were two armed boys sitting on the front steps, and I heard the flat notes of a sentry's whistle announcing someone approaching. Brooklyn was in war mode.
I recognized the two boys as Bootstrap and Cards, two older boys who gave me unemotional looks. Their eyes were flat, like a shark's. I didn't like that.
"What's going on around here?" The two young men exchanged looks and then shrugged at me.
"You're not the boss's lady anymore, sorry."
"Yeah. You're Manhattan now." My eyes fairly bugged out of my head but Emotions walked out of the lodging house just then and saw the fury on my cold face.
"This is RIOT you two goons. Riot get in here before you freeze to death." The two sullenly stood aside so I could walk up the stairs. Something was massively wrong here. Emotions guided me into the kitchen and began brewing some tea. She didn't speak, and her shoulders were stiff.
"Emotions." I saw her jerk and look over her shoulder. She actually looked afraid. I had NEVER seen Emotions look afraid. Pouring hot water into two cracked mugs, she placed one in front of me, and sat down at the kitchen table, indicating that I should do so as well.
The kitchen door swung open wildly and I was assaulted by two whirling dervishes. Hide and Seek all but leapt on me, their thin faces so happy I felt a stabbing pain in my gut.
"You came back! Where have you been?"
"We missed you!" Hide plucked at my sleeve and Seek stood as close to me as he could get without crawling onto my lap. I felt the back of my throat burn with unshed tears as I smoothed their unruly blonde hair away from their faces.
"You two have gotten so big! And you both need haircuts!" The two young boys laughed and hugged me. They were followed in by Duck, Bookworm, Sprite, and Fingers.
"Okay guys, tell me what's going on here. I ran into Declan already. Spill it." Eyes darted around the table nervously. I could feel my face turning red with frustration.
"Look Declan already told me about Pixie being Spot's new girl." I stammered at the last part, not ready to accept it. I couldn't believe that he had moved on already.
"He's just using her," Emotions stated matter-of-factly after shooing Hide and Seek out of the room.
"Using her. Right. That makes it okay."
"I didn't say it made it right, Riot," Emotions said defensively. I held up my hands and waved them.
"You're right, you're right. I left, he's a guy, I get it. All I want is to know what's got everyone so up in arms about all of a sudden. I'll deal with Spot as a separate issue." More eye darting. Wrapping my hands around the mug of tea in front of me to warm my fingers, I zeroed in on Duck.
"C'mon Duck, tell me." Duck looked around helplessly before stiffening her shoulders and giving me a level look.
"Well you know Spot is helping Declan get guns and supplies to go to Ireland. Well there are some people who aren't happy about that. Some of us have gotten beaten up, but Spot is a fanatic about it. All he cares about is money lately, and it's because of you."
I felt like she had taken a knife and shoved it into my chest. Raising my eyes I met hers steadily.
"I never asked him to do this."
"I know that Riot, but he's doing it for you and the baby! He thinks if he gets you a house and money that you'll take him back."
"GODDAMN-IT!" I burst out, slapping my hands down onto the table in front of me. Everyone jumped and I saw Fingers edge towards the doorway. Brushing a lock of my black hair out of my narrow face I wanted to cry.
"All I asked him for was freedom! I said I wasn't an object that he could own and boss around. I never asked him to do this, or told him he needed to get me money. I just want my baby to have a father!" The girls all looked at me, uneasiness on their faces.
"He is a stubborn asshole! If he wants Pixie, and he wants all this then FINE. I give up."
"He's not the only stubborn one," Fingers said quietly. I had stood up and I whirled on her, face contorting in anger. She looked taken aback, but I stopped ranting abruptly.
"You're right," I said again, patting Fingers on the shoulder. Everyone relaxed visibly. There was silence in the kitchen as we all calmed down. I took a deep breath and shook my head.
"I need to talk to Spot." Emotions snorted and shook her head.
"Good luck. All he does is sit in his room making plans with Action or doing...uhm...God knows what with Pixie. He barely talks to any of us anymore." Punching one of my hands into the other, I headed out of the kitchen. He would damn well talk to me whether he wanted to or not.
I walked up the stairs and ran into Action, who looked at me wide-eyed before smiling a little and saying it was nice to see me. I nodded back at him and kept going before I lost my resolve.
When I got to the end of the doorway, I rapped my knuckles hard on the door. There was no response so I did it again. I heard shuffling and voices from the inside, and then the door opened to reveal Pixie wearing just a shirt that fell to her upper thighs.
"What do you want?" She snapped at me. I didn't even look at her, just beyond her to where Spot lay sprawled across his mattress. He sat up and put his arms behind his head, trying to look relaxed but I saw how stiff and still he had gotten when he saw that it was me.
"Get out of here, I need to talk to Spot." Pixie laughed at me and cast a flirtatious look back towards Spot.
"You can't tell me what to do, I..."
"Pixie get out of here." Pixie whirled around to look at Spot and when she met his frigid blue stare, she bent down and stomped into a pair of pants. Then she knocked into me as she left the room. I took it, curling an arm around my belly protectively.
Spot sat completely up and hollered for Pixie to come back. She did so, her eyes hopeful. Spot pointed to where I stood just inside the doorway.
"Don't ever hit her like that again," was all he said. Pixie knew better than to argue. She just nodded, shot me a contemptuous glare and flounced off. Spot stood up off the mattress and walked over to his desk and grabbed for a pouch of tobacco.
Rolling it into a thin cigarette, he turned to stare at me, his eyes so blue and so cold.
"You want to talk? Fine we'll talk."
SHOUT OUTS
Heavenly Princess - Yes I want to strangle my characters on a daily basis. I don't know why I make Riot and Spot's relationship so hard but they are both people who are not easy to be around. Sorry it's frustrating! I'm evil. :D Thanks for reading though.
MushSpotgoil - Thanks sorry I took so long to update! Thanks for reading :)
Missfervent - Aww thanks I'm glad you like it. Riot is going to come to her senses but it might be too late...dun dun duuuuuun. I love your characters thank YOU for letting ME use them. Hope you like this chapter! :)