My Best Friend's Wedding

Disclaimer: DON'T ASK ME – 'cause I didn't write the book!

AN: Yes, the day of the wedding is finally here. I love you all! Go and enjoy!

Chapter ten: The Distraction Reaction

"I can't do this," she tells Enjolras, sitting on her hands to keep from tearing things apart in sadness, anger, and frustration. "I need to get away from here! I need to do something about this madness! I said I wouldn't let it happen, and now it is happening. I failed and you were not that big of a help, lover. I really can't do this!"

She is this close to actually hyperventilating, and the wedding is hours away from actually happening. It is only going to get worse from here, and there is nothing for her to do until the wedding starts. She can only spend so much time on her looks, and she does not want to ruin her pretty red dress by spilling something on it or sweating like a pig – cause she is currently sweating more than during high school gym classes.

"We still have a few hours to go before the wedding starts," he tells her.

"Do something to distract me," she orders, counting the minutes. "I'm dying here!"

There are now exactly one hundred and ninety-six minutes before the wedding starts, and already the clock is ticking too slowly for her to be able to deal. Minutes are starting to seem like hours, and she can't take almost two hundred of those. There is too much time and she has too little to do, sitting outside of the room that has been assigned for the guests of honor to get dressed and get ready. It is not their turn to use the room yet, because she has asked for a later time so that she would not tear her dress to bits with all of the tension running through her body. But now there is too much time.

"How am I supposed to distract you?" he has no ideas what to do.

"Tell me a story," she proposes. "Give me an orgasm – that always calms me down."

That just completely stops him in his tracks. He was pacing the floor, just as impatient as she was, but now he cannot move a muscle because she surprised him so much just by telling him a hidden truth about herself. She does like sex when she is stressed, because stress makes her crave a distraction, and sex is one of the few things that can make her leave her brain and enter her body again. If only he was not made of marble.

"What did you just say?" of course his blush would return to his face.

"You heard me," she refuses to be embarrassed. "Give me an orgasm or give me a story."

She is now looking at those hands of his, because while she already knows that his tongue is very talented, she knows that such an act would be too personal – and she also wants to know all of the undoubtedly many talents that his fingers have to offer. She is now distracted by her imaginings of what something like that could be like between the two of them. It surprises her, because she loves Marius. She has always loved Marius, and thoughts of other men continue to feel like cheating to her.

"We're in a public place," he is motioning to the empty hallway.

"It's not that public," she knows how secluded their corner is, because no one else has come by and noticed them in at least thirty minutes. "I'm not easily embarrassed."

One step closer to him and then another, and she is right in front of him and ready to have him put his hands all over her and show her why he is more than the Marble Man everyone seems to think he is. So, she's a little sexually frustrated.

"I cannot believe you just asked me that," Enjolras seems to be outraged.

"I can't believe you're not doing it yet," she is trying not to play with his tie.

It is almost making her feel like a bit of a creep, when she is trying to convince him to let go of his inhibitions enough to pleasure her in an empty hallway. Honestly, it almost sounds like the plot to a porno, but she is still very fond of this idea and hopes that it will actually will happen. Honestly, she cannot deny that she is attracted to him, and now that she knows that he is also a passionate man and a great kisser, she is even more hooked than she was before. He had better be good enough to make her forget Marius' name, and maybe even her own. He had better make her forget everything.

"I can't just do that," he is still unable to say the actual words.

"But I really want you to," she gives in and undoes his tie a little, and a little more.

He is actually more comfortable without it – he has to be, because nobody likes that sort of thing being all up in his or her neck business. That's what she is calling it, anyway, because it is the only term that perfectly describes it.

"I already told you I'm not having sex with you," he starts whispering really softly.

"I don't need full sex to get off, lover," she pouts. "I can always show you that."

Somehow it seems as if he is actually debating going through with this. And she is going to do everything that she possibly can to keep him from changing his mind about this – she wants this to happen so badly that her thighs are actually shaking with the effort it is taking not to wrap themselves around him. This chemistry is electric and she has trouble breathing around him now, because his hair is messy and his tie is undone and he looks debauched enough for her to think about doing all kinds of dirty things with him.

"How are you so comfortable with this?" he undoes his tie completely.

"I like sex," she grins at him, "when a man at least tries to make me come."

There have been some seriously sucky bouts of sex when the guy in question just could not keep her excited enough to make it fun for her. She is sure that Enjolras would sooner forgo his own orgasm than let her go without.

"People could hear," he is all of a sudden scandalized again.

"I'm sure people know all about sex and orgasms," she has to enunciate. "At least, I hope so. Otherwise I would probably feel a little sorry for them. Orgasms are great."

Even Gabriel Enjolras must know about the powers of orgasms, and if he does not know, she will be very happy to enlighten him about this particular kind of superpowers. But judging by his very much closed off body language, his doubts has taken over and he is not going to consider her request even further. He is too caught up in his ideas of celibacy to help her with this, and to see how good they can be. She needs the release and she likes him regardless – damn it, this is all too confusing anyway.

She does not want to deal with this any longer. She does not want to think anymore.

"So what kind of story should I tell you?" he now denies her the possibility.

"Somehow I'm a little disappointed at that choice," she is more frustrated now.

Her hands have turned into claws, scratching at her bare arms until they are covered in white lines. The patterns only manage to hold her interest for so long until she has to do it again – but it is the only other way she can think of in which she is distracted.

"You should have expected it," his tie remains undone.

When he makes sure all of his buttons are still buttoned she actually feels more than a bit of dread at seeing him so composed again. The curls are still a mess, and that helps her feel a little better about this, but she still wanted him to choose the other option, and that continues to be a bit of a mixed bag for her. She does not know how to feel about it, and while that is a distraction, it is definitely not the good kind of distraction.

"I did expect this to be your choice, eventually," she should have expected this.

"But you're still disappointed?" that seems to be a surprise to him, that he could fail her by being the Marble Man. "I don't think I need to know. What kind of story?"

He has gotten by before by pretending that he is nothing more than the Marble Man who does not have any emotions. No one else has ever attempted to look beyond that, or when they do try, he manages to steer them far away from his real issues and his real feelings. She appears to be the only one who isn't deterred by it – even R occasionally appears like he has given up on making 'Jolras feel anything real.

"Tell me about you," she proposes then, trying to look away from her arms.

"There is nothing to tell," he is making it pretty obvious that he is lying to her.

There are just too many secrets lurking underneath his emotionless shell. She has occasionally managed to slip between the cracks in his marble, and she might have even caused a few of those cracks herself, and that has made her see that there is just so much more to him than even he knows. He has already denied himself so many of the pleasures in life that she doubts he even knows what he could do. He could bring the female population of the world to their knees, but he would never take advantage of that power, because that is just who he is. But now she just has to know more.

"I beg to differ," she needs to know some things. "Over the last few weeks you have found out just about everything there is to know about me. You know more about me than most of my friends to, and I still know next to nothing about you. Do you have any siblings, and what is your family like? Why did you choose to go to law school? Why can't I call you Gabriel? Honestly, I can think of dozens of questions I have for you. Why are you celibate? And I don't need the talk of Patria. I need a real reason. Why?"

She just has so many questions that she really wants answers to, and he has yet to give her anything that she can use in this. Now she just has to keep trying to get an answer out of him, and many she will get a better insight into who he really is.

"Patria is the real reason," he continues to protest any other reasons.

"I will not believe that you never get the urge to," she sits down again starts pondering some of the most creative euphemisms she has heard her students using over her several years of working at schools. "Let me see, what euphemism would make you blush the most? Rub one out? Walk the dog? Go on a date with Rosie Palms?"

Every word coming out of her mouth makes him turn more red – it is amazing!

"Yes, I do occasionally masturbate," he says, but even the back of his neck is red.

"You just made this line of questioning way less fun," she shows him her best pout.

It was supposed to be a fun way to pass the time, but he nipped that thing in the bud before it could get really good. She has a lot more embarrassing euphemisms in mind that she could use to make his embarrassment distract her some more. There are so many things that she could say, and he is not nearly red enough for her tastes, so she can just keep going until she has to get dressed for the stupid wedding.

"Your questioning of my sex life is not supposed to be fun," he is indignant.

"Not for you, it isn't," she rebuts triumphantly, showing him another grin.

So far, it has been really fun for her, and him calling it off makes it a lot less fun. He has provided no other distraction thus far, so she is going to keep embarrassing him until he gives her something else to think about. There are still about three hours between now and the wedding, and she cannot get through those three hours without a really good distraction, one she is hoping that he will provide for her. Also, she just wants to be fair and know as much about him as he knows about her.

"Why do you want to know so badly?" her 'Jolras seems annoyed at this.

"Because I know you're not made of marble," she has to explain. "You have feelings just like everybody else, and I doubt you have never felt anything for anyone. You're twenty-eight years old, and you cannot have gone through these years without any feelings."

There is no way that it is possible to live without love and without feelings. He has feelings, and she has witnessed them, so he simply cannot continue to tell her the contrary, because she does know better and she is not easily fooled. He should know that by now, so he should probably just give in to her before she makes it worse.

"Of course I have feelings," he only tells her what she already knows.

"So?" she tries to make him discuss more than just that.

"I just choose not to act on these feelings," he says. "They are too much of a distraction."

Him and his stupid belief that feelings can only be a distraction from much more important things – she almost pities him because he cannot see just how much good feelings can do for people. They have just never done that for her.

"Do you look down on me for letting my feelings rule my life?" she has to know.

"I don't look down on you," he is quick to assure her of that.

She is not so quick to believe him about that, though. He is a lawyer, so he is very good at lying and not showing just what he really believes. He must think her such a stupid and naïve simpleton who lets her feelings mean everything in her life. He must think that he is homo novus and she is a more primitive species – she feels like such a fool.

"You have judged me about this, have you not?" she knows that this is true.

"I think you are very brave," he just about stuns her with his response.

There is nothing really brave about her – there is nothing but stubbornness and stupidity that makes her continue on a doomed path. She is not special in any way, and she has long ago made her peace with that, as long as she could continue to be special to someone. Now she is no longer special to anyone, she has next to nothing left but her stupidity and her stubbornness. Still, she has to make it through this too.

"How would you get brave from all this stupidity?" she has never seen anything like this.

"You are brave enough to love without holding anything back," there is a hint of longing in his voice, and she is trying not to let it tear her apart, "and without expecting anything in return. You just love, and you do it with all your heart."

It sounds as if he wants to love that way too, but that would be completely the opposite of what he has always been saying. She just does not understand him at all.

"That is just about the last way in which I thought you would see it," she scoffs.

"I guess I'm full of surprises," he smiles at her and she has no idea what to say.

While he is definitely right about that, she just does not know what comes next.

"You have no idea," she shakes her head, still unsure of what to say to him.

Every single time she thinks that she has figured him out he shows something else about him that completely changes who she thinks he is. Maybe someday she will finally get the complete picture – but that day will probably not be today. Still, everything that he can tell her today would both be a lovely distraction and a way to figure out who her new friend is. She wants to know what makes him tick.

"Is this why you want to know more about me?" he asks her the question.

"It is at least a part of the reason, yes," she admits. "You are such a secretive person."

She can spend the hours before the wedding just listing the many things that she still want to know about him, ranging from boring and silly questions like his favorite piece of clothing to something like the reason he does not want to be called Gabriel. She wants to know who he thinks of when he does rub one out – because for some reason she is now hoping that that person's her. Yeah, she is even freaking herself out.

"I like to think of myself as a private person," he is still correcting her.

"We are friends now, are we not?" she has to wonder. "Friends tell each other things."

Are they friends? She believes that they are friends after everything that they have gone through together. It would be weird for them not to be friends after having had her tongue down his throat and his legs around his waist. They even cuddled for fuck's sake, and that is not something that she ever does with anyone. They have to be friends.

"I suppose that you are right about that," he appears to be mulling it over.

There is nothing to think about in her opinion. Can he still doubt that they are friends, or is there something else to this? Does he doubt that friends tell each other secrets?

"Tell me something that I don't know about you," she leaves it open for him.

"I have one younger sister," he chooses something that seems pretty mundane at first thought, "and her name is Natalie. She is two years younger than I am. She is mostly happily married, and she is pregnant with her first child."

That is just about the last things that she expected him to say. He would be the protective big brother type; she can definitely picture that about him. He would be the guy who sat around waiting for his little sister to come home safe – and he would lecture the boyfriend in question and make sure his sister was treated right. He would be the perfect kind of big brother for any girl. She just knows that.

"So, is she like your complete opposite?" everything feels like a sitcom trope now.

"Natalie is the genius in the family," he does not sound so happy to be talking about his sister – he sounds insecure. "She has always been the smart one, while I had to work harder for things to go my way – things always seemed easy to her."

Here is the smartest and most hardworking guy she knows being worried about not being good enough. He is practically a genius, and he has accomplished things that most people – including she – can only dream of doing. Honestly, in comparison to most of the men she has known in her life, Enjolras is pretty close to being a superhero.

"Are you serious?" she cannot believe this. "You are the smartest guy I know!"

Coming from her, he might not believe that means all that much, but she still looks up to him when it comes to his intelligence and work ethic.

"Maybe that is more of a reflection on the people you know than on me," he proposes.

"I refuse to believe that," she refuses to listen to him. "How can you doubt yourself when you are an incredibly successful lawyer with a great job? You are respected by everyone who knows you – even though your friends make fun of you from time to time, you know that they still respect the hell out of you and what you've made of your life."

Basically, they are idiots, but these idiots do love him as their close friend.

"None of you have met Natalie," Enjolras almost does not want to say her name.

"Wow," he surprises her yet again. "I never pegged you as having such low self-esteem."

She figured that she was the inferior one in this partnership, being as he is the wealthy only son from some upper-class family and she is the poor and traumatized child of two infamous con artists who has serious trust issues. Yeah, there is no way that she gets to be superior in this partnership, and still he does not seem to see it, especially after he called her stupidity being brave. She does not know how to make him see.

"Natalie was Wonder Woman in our house," he explains it more clearly. "I was the invisible boy. She was in my grade, even though she was two years younger. College was the first time that she was not with me. Everyone always thought that we were twins."

His sister must be the only person that he can compare himself to and seemingly come up lacking. She has not met this girl yet, so she cannot say anything real about her, but she does know that Gabriel is a wonderful person who would not be second even to Wonder Woman – no matter how awesome that hero is.

"I am going to meet her whether you like it or not," she announces, grinning at him.

"What excuse would you have for meeting her?" this does not please him.

"I am the love of your life," she uses her matter of face voice, "remember?"

Of course she has to fake hurt at being forgotten as the love of his life. She is this close to figuring out his sister's phone number and calling her up as the long-term girlfriend of her older brother. Natalie probably would never believe it, but she might be able to make it work if she leans on some of her old family skills enough. She has not forgotten most of the ways in which she can make people believe things that simply are not true, and she has no qualms about using them to find out more about 'Jolras.

"She is never going to believe that," he scoffs, "and unlike Marius, she is hard to fool."

"Will you not let me, as your friend, meet your sister?" she sends him another pout.

Judging by the way he keeps focusing on her lips, she has managed to successfully distract him from what she has been saying. She likes that he is now showing at least some signs of an attraction to her, because it almost makes up for how insanely attracted she is to him and his stupid face and gorgeous body and – ugh, nope.

She is still in love with Marius, damn it!

"Do not try to embarrass me," somehow Enjolras has managed to recover.

"Revealing your fears to people makes you seem much more human," she tries that.

Not even she believes that much of what she is saying, but she decides to give it a try anyway, hoping to get something out of him this way.

"Says the woman who thinks showing her own vulnerability is a sign of weakness," of course he can see right through that trick she is trying to play.

"I grew up knowing vulnerability gets you killed," she has to admit that.

Still, even though she has already admitted to this in front of him, it is not something that she particularly wants to be discussing when it is just hours away from the wedding of the man she loves. She just wants to not think about anything serious – and they were doing pretty well at that before. But now, she is stressed and confused and sad again.

"It's a wedding," he suddenly reminds her. "Shouldn't we be happy?"

Neither of them has been happy throughout the entire wedding process – at least not when thinking about something related to the actual wedding. She has been happiest when Marius still appreciated her – which did not happen here. No, she has been happy surrounded by Enjolras and the rest of the Amis. They have made her smile and even laugh from time to time, even when everything seemed to fall apart right in front of her because Marius is no longer hers. She needs her boys around her.

"I never said we were even remotely like anyone else," she scoffs, hating the reminder.

"I never wanted to be like anyone else," even he appears to be lying about this.

He wants to be more like his sister, she knows that much – otherwise he would not be so sensitive about this subject. He thinks that people cannot love him for who he really is inside, so he hides and keeps himself at a distance. He envies her for her openness and brash nature, while she wishes she could think things through more. Luckily enough she has him around to keep her from embarrassing herself too much, like she would have if she had gone through with her stupid cake idea. This partnership works.

"You're still my Superboy, 'Jolras," she reassures him. "I'm the invisible girl."

"I doubt you are ever going to be invisible to anyone," he is actually smiling at her.

She has lived her life sneaking into the background or only being known as the friend of Marius Pontmercy, one of the most popular guys around. She is always the Shadow or the invisible girl, and she is mostly okay with that, as long as she has Marius.

"I've always been invisible to Marius," she hates having to remind him of that.

"He doesn't count," 'Jolras dismisses him. "He is disqualified by his own idiocy."

Once again Enjolras needs to be cruel about Marius for some reason, probably to make her see that he is not some kind of perfect angel coming to save her. And she is trying to understand that, but she is having trouble letting go of these silly romantic visions she had of Marius finally coming to his senses and seeing her for who she really is.

"He's still your friend, Enjolras," she continues to defend Marius.

"And he is still your friend as well," he says. "He'll be begging for your forgiveness soon."

Even though she is still hoping that this will actually happen, she is doubtful. Marius will be much too busy with his wedding and his beautiful bride to even consider his old friend who was stupid enough to believe that maybe they could be more one day.

"I highly doubt that," she is much more skeptical, as usual.

"You'll see," at least someone is keeping the faith in Marius, for some reason.

It is the oddest reversal of their roles from before, but she desperately wants to believe that he is the one in the right this time around. She wants her Marius back.

e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e- e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e

"I do," Marius is officially no longer hers.

It is both easier and harder to breathe at the same time. It is harder, of course, because she is never going to be able to have the relationship with Marius that they always had before this. They are never going to be the same kind of best friends that they were before, and he has had no time to apologize to her either, so she does not know if they can even be friends at all. Somehow, now that he is officially Cosette's Marius, it is easier to stop hoping and she will finally be able to get over him.

"I now pronounce you man and wife," the minister sounds solemn but happy.

"You might want to look away now," Enjolras gently advises her. "Here be kissing."

While she knows this in her head, and she has been dreading this very moment probably the most of all; it all still comes as a surprise to her. She turns away quickly, frantically looking for a place to hide her face – and he offers the crook of his neck up without a second thought. She hides herself there before the trouble starts.

"You may kiss the bride," the minister continues his speech.

There will be a day when this no longer hurts her, but she knows that that day is not today and she is glad that she has Enjolras here to support her in this. Her face is safely hidden by him and he smells good enough to distract her from some of her troubles.

"You can do better than that, Marius," R is shouting at the happy couple.

"I should have known," 'Jolras is whispering to her. "He'd never let an opportunity to embarrass Marius pass him by. Just wait a little bit longer."

His voice is right by her ear and there is a shiver going down her spine.

"Can I look now?" she is getting impatient with her current position.

"I like the red dress," his random sentence quickly distracts her again. "It looks nice."

It is probably her favorite piece of clothing that she has ever owned, and while it is a lot more modest than her stupid Sexy Dress ™, it still shows her off perfectly. It is a deep dark red that suits her complexion really well, and it is short enough to show off her killer legs, without putting her hoo-hah on display for the world to see. And there's lace, which for some reason she finds interesting and pretty when it is usually extremely unpractical and silly. Her left sleeve is made entirely of the prettiness.

"Better than the other dress?" she has to ask him for some reason.

"More appropriate than the other dress," the mention of her black dress makes his Adams apple move. "You can look again. They're done."

While she does hate having to move away from him relatively soon, she is glad to find out that the newlyweds have managed to separate from each other long enough to get a decent breath of air. She has unconsciously been playing with his red tie – the exact color of her favorite dress – and he is close to not only matching her dress, but his tie as well. She has managed to distract him again, or she has made him feel something.

"Thank God," she rolls her eyes.

"Don't thank anyone just yet," he is smiling at her audacity. "They're coming to see us."

She is probably going to forgive Marius, and she has known that since she saw him smile at Cosette walking down the aisle in her pretty princess dress. She is ready to move on from him now – there is no chance for them now. She is going to be a good friend from now on, and just appreciate his happiness and the fact that he still wants her around even after all of the shit they have been through. Things will be okay.

"I'm so excited," she plasters on a fake smile, because she is not ready for a real one yet.

"Please forgive me, Eppie," Marius is glowing with happiness over his Cosette, and still he cannot manage to look completely happy. "Please be my friend again."

While she gets up to hug her dear friend, she cannot help but notice the look Enjolras steals at her legs – so she has still got it after all. This is still not the time to think about it, so she focuses on Marius again, ready to show her forgiveness.

"If you can let me move on, we will be okay," she promises.

"Thank you Eppie," Marius hugs her so closely she has trouble breathing.

With a real pronounced cough from both her and Enjolras – her loyal watchdog and partner in crime – Marius finally lets go. Cosette just seems amused at the whole situation, holding her arms out for a hug as well. She hopes this will mean that they have finally forgiven each other for stupid mistakes made as children.

"We're okay, Éponine," the other woman tells her, and they both smile.

"Your turn is later, 'Jolras," she tells her fake boyfriend then.

There is no way that she can tell them that she is not actually dating Enjolras. She is just going to keep the charade going until they both go back home – and they can eventually tell their friends that they broke up amicably for whatever reason he wants, because she just about owes him everything. He can say whatever he wants about this fake breakup, and she will agree with everything he says on the subject.

"I'm going to want more than a hug," he gets into character very quickly.

"I promise you'll see what is and isn't underneath this dress," she teases in return.

Which is not that much, if she is forced to be honest about it. The cut of the dress just does not allow for a proper bra, and the strapless thing that she is wearing instead is extremely tight so that nothing falls out or looks weird. As for the panties situation, there is not much fabric there, but there is some.

Honestly, if he decides that he wants to see it, he will be a lucky man.

"I'm going to hold you to that," his voice has taken on that hoarse tone again.

"I am definitely going to remember," she leans in to say that to him.

Marius and Cosette look as if they are a little uncomfortable about this, and she wants to let them move on to their other friends, the ones who seem a little more ready to congratulate the two of them. She is just a little too shaken at the moment.

"Go see your family," she motions for Marius and Cosette to move on.

She has Enjolras to sexually excite – because that has to be what she is doing. She is going to find out everything about this that she possibly can. Her curiosity is probably going to be the downfall of her, but she kind of likes that.

AN: As always, let me know your favorite parts/lines/whatever! I love you all! Let me know who you are if/when you contact me!

Robyn, you're great! Do find a way to contact me where I can talk to you as well!