Hey guys, I'm so sorry that it has taken this long for this to get out. I have had so much going on and a new litter of little foster kittens that I haven't had much time for writing, but I hope that I will be able to get more of this out faster now. I even have a new laptop that I am breaking in. What better way than to write for all those people who think this crazy head of mine has a few good ideas :D
Chapter 6:
Survival is merely breathing. Being alive, but to truly live, to have a reason to live... I lost my will for life during my first year at Hogwarts. I made friends for the first time in centuries, which I trusted completely and shared everything with, but they couldn't take it. They ran terrified away from me as fast as they could. I guess... maybe I am just unlovable.
During the summer I get no letters. I had thought that maybe the twins would have sent at least one, but...
"I know what day it is." The fat creature known as Dudley said.
"Congratulations, when do you learn about numbers?" I said sarcastically, but the boy didn't understand or was too keen on taunting me to get angry about it... I have no doubt that it is the former.
"It's your birthday. You haven't got any letters, what? Got no friends at that freak school of yours?" he laughed. For once he was right and managed to make it hurt.
The day passes in a similar manner and the Dursleys get ready for their business dinner I wonder about Dray and Nev. Would they ever be able to get over what I am? But I am a vampire and classified as a dark creature. They have been raised to hate me. Unwelcome tears of blood streak down my face as I cry. Alone in my small room filled with Dudley's old broken things. I can hear the loud rumble of conversation downstairs as the guests arrive, but feel myself drifting. Lying on my bed sore and tired from a day of cleaning and cooking, preparing for this dinner, and not being feed (or having been able to feed well since I have returned) I fall into a light doze.
Content in my imaginings of being with my mate a faint smile touches my lips. The last one I will give for some time. That is when I am rudely awakened.
"BOY!" Vernon yelled. "It's all your fault. I lost my deal and I know you did something. You're going to suffer for this boy!" The walrus of a man growled.
Locks, bars on my window, and a cat flap on my door. I was turned into a prisoner in this small, boring room. I got no chance to sneak out and get blood so during my captivity I was getting weaker every day. It barely took three days before Vernon decided I wasn't suffering enough and brought in his belt.
During one of my whippings I was thinking and remembered one conversation between Draco and myself. He'd offered to let me stay with him for a while during the holidays, but I didn't let my thoughts linger. It hurts to think about them, especially when I wonder what they would have done to help me out of this if they had known, or even suspected that there was something wrong here.
My routine of being regularly whipped by Vernon didn't change during the rest of the holidays. The burning pain caused by the belt once again ripping through my skin and leaking my precious lifeblood onto the sheets and walls was a common companion and the longer it went on the worse I noticed I was getting. I wouldn't last very long at this rate.
My Hogwarts letter was my salvation in many ways, when the Dursleys remembered why they were afraid of me, at least enough to let me out of my room, and even the house, long enough to gather my things for the new school year. While avoiding people that I know, especially Draco and Neville, who I noticed in Florish and Blotts they were talking amongst themselves, but too quietly for me to hear. Did however manage to hear the argument between Mr Weasley and Mr Malfoy and the fight that took place not long after. I was barely in control of myself to not laugh at the sight, but in the interest of not drawing attention to myself I managed the willpower to remain unnoticed.
It took a lot more energy than I thought, not to rush to Draco and Neville. I guess I really should get used to calling them by their last names, but even if just for a little while longer I want to hold onto the memory of the friends we had been. To have had that potential for such a good friends. It just makes me feel so alone. I noticed the twins had sent a letter or two to the house, but I was never allowed to have them. Petunia and Vernon exclaimed loudly over breakfast when it happened, Errol their old family owl had obviously flown in on their breakfast to deliver it. He was lucky to get away with just being shooed out of the house. I got a hard lashing for it. Still it would have been nice to hear from someone over the holidays. Having had friends once I know what it could be like and I will never really be able to return to how I was before, when I didn't care that I was all alone.
Leaving the sight of my former friends behind I reluctantly return to the Dursleys for the last days before I am allowed to make my way onto the train back to Hogwarts.
Making my way silently onto the red train that has become my salvation I find myself an empty compartment and wait silently to arrive at the school. Avoiding an encounter with either Draco or Neville I tiredly sit alone in the compartment. Starved of blood and aching open wounds on my back from my Uncles 'care' I wonder if I will get a chance to hunt in the forbidden forest tonight, or if I will even make it that far and not attack a student. Slightly worried I cast a triggered stunning charm on myself, that if I try and attack anyone I will pass out instead.
Just after I complete the spell the Weasley Twins come in to say hi. We chat for a while, laughing and joking, all together it was probably the best time I'd had since the end of last year, but too soon they noticed Malfoy and Longbottoms absence and decided to mention it in that way that they have of finishing each other's sentences.
"I... don't know. We had a... falling out at the end of last year, they aren't talking to me." I reply awkwardly.
The twins share a glance before turning back to me.
"You look unwell Harry.
"Are you alright?" They ask.
"Yeah, I got the flu over the holidays and I'm still recovering, it's not anything serious though." I try to sound convincing, but I don't think it worked when they share another look. The conversation turned forced from then on and soon after they left. I just hope that Longbottom and Malfoy don't say anything about what I am, I don't want to be kicked out of school because of this, or have more people hating me.
The rest of my journey back to the school is passed alone in silence. I want to right to the common room, but I don't know the password to get in and I don't have the patients to wait through the welcoming feast, so instead I go to the infirmary. Placing strong concealment charms and charms to imitate life signals such as a heartbeat and body temperature I collapse into one of the beds and before I know it I am asleep. Lingering in my mind I realise I chose the bed I had woken up in at the end of last year and if I had the presence of mind I might have laughed that I always ended up in this bed, but didn't think more than that about it.
My dreams were tormented by the voices of the past, friends I might have made had I not kept my distance, people I could have known better if they hadn't died. My sire and clan are among them and my nightmare seems to go on and on. When I wake it is just before dawn but that is no surprise. What does worry me though is that I appear to be paralysed. For no apparent reason. I can't feel any magic holding me down... could it be. Could it be that I am just too weak to move. Too soon I realize its much worse than that. I can smell blood and voices become clearer the more aware I become.
"Now Mr Malfoy if you would hold still I can fix that nose of yours in a jiffy." the energetic matron fusses. The other people... I think there are three others, but the sounds are blurring together that I can only manage to get every other word. I did catch "broken... bloody...Twins..."
Madame Pomfery cut through the mumbling declaring "That nose isn't broken, you've ruptured a blood vessel. That's why its bleeding so much. You'll be right as rain for the next lesson."
I hear the woman tinkering with potion phials before the voices grow distant. The matron soon appears by my side pulling the curtain away from my bed.
"Mr Potter, you are very ill. I can't let you leave any time soon, something is draining your magic, and therefore not letting it regenerate as it usually would. If the cause of this drain isn't located it could prove fatal." she scolded as though it was my fault. It kind of was though. If the bindings were removed I would attack anything with blood nearby without thinking twice about it. That binding added to the glamour's and life replicating charms and my blood loss/ injuries from over the summer all must have drained my magic to dangerous levels. Pomfery hurries off to write the report on my mystery condition that could kill me while I am left lying alone in the hospital bed unable to move or speak. At least at this point I am still able to open my eyes.
So thank you for reading the newest chapter of A New Life (I still don't like the name X( ideas?) I hope I'll get the next chapter out in a couple of days if not sooner, but it could have to wait, I'm starting a new course soon.